Abstinence only: interesting findings

Yes, I agree....I got him the box myself! And told him to keep one in his wallet. ....I was not encouraging him to have sex! But knowing the peer pressure and the teenagers hormones, I felt it wise for him to be prepared. Why he did not use it, I don't know! That's why I called him "a Jerk"!
 
rockin'robin said:
Yes, I agree....I got him the box myself! And told him to keep one in his wallet. ....I was not encouraging him to have sex! But knowing the peer pressure and the teenagers hormones, I felt it wise for him to be prepared. Why he did not use it, I don't know! That's why I called him "a Jerk"!
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Ouch! I missed the part that he had "UN" protected sex! Geez!

No Normal loving parent, would encourage such thing for their teen to have sex.


So I understand what you are saying now. :aw:
 
rockin'robin said:
Yes, I agree....I got him the box myself! And told him to keep one in his wallet. ....I was not encouraging him to have sex! But knowing the peer pressure and the teenagers hormones, I felt it wise for him to be prepared. Why he did not use it, I don't know! That's why I called him "a Jerk"!
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I applaud you for buying the condoms for your son. I also understand how worried you must have been when he told the doctor he had unprotected sex. But we will hope that he learned his lesson, and takes advantage of the fact that he has such a caring mother and use the danged condoms from now on!:P
 
jillio said:
I applaud you for buying the condoms for your son. I also understand how worried you must have been when he told the doctor he had unprotected sex. But we will hope that he learned his lesson, and takes advantage of the fact that he has such a caring mother and use the danged condoms from now on!:P
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I sure hopes he listens to his mother!

:P
 
He better!...Or I'll have to take drastic measures and super glue his thingy to his nuts! HAHA!! :giggle:
 
The only thing Sarah preached on was abortion.. yes, she stressed on waiting til marriage, but she did allow birth control teaching to her daughter. In fact, she supported it. But her daughter is a grown woman who chose differently... But she did keep the child! These days, girls like her would just go to abortion clinic.

I believe people should wait til marriage myself. Not easy thing to do. I know some people wait til they found someone they love and care for instead of marriage...Some girls did want to wait til marriage, and when they found someone they love, they figure they are going to get marry anyway so what's the harm? I think Palin's daughter thought so too. But that's where these girls/guys made a mistake.

Anyway, I still support we should still stress on Abstience til marriage.. but I also feel that we should support birth control teaching too... as long as they treat it as a marriage thing . Such as " If you and your spouse do not want to get pregnant on your honeymoon or one of you are not sure if you have HIV and don't want to be stuck with a child and definitely don't want to go through an abortion, here's what you should do" At least the kids will know what to do if they decided not to wait and yet this could send the message to the kids not to go around and have sex especially while they are still in high school.

I know some people don't want to get marry, and that's their choice. But don't let it prevent school from teaching about marriage (or least deep commitment to each other) for the children who would love to have both mother and father at home , even if it was for a little while (divorce). Because last I check, MOST PEOPLE are going to be parents one day-- married or not.
 
Lighthouse77 said:
The only thing Sarah preached on was abortion.. yes, she stressed on waiting til marriage, but she did allow birth control teaching to her daughter. In fact, she supported it. But her daughter is a grown woman who chose differently... But she did keep the child! These days, girls like her would just go to abortion clinic.

I believe people should wait til marriage myself. Not easy thing to do. I know some people wait til they found someone they love and care for instead of marriage...Some girls did want to wait til marriage, and when they found someone they love, they figure they are going to get marry anyway so what's the harm? I think Palin's daughter thought so too. But that's where these girls/guys made a mistake.

Anyway, I still support we should still stress on Abstience til marriage.. but I also feel that we should support birth control teaching too... as long as they treat it as a marriage thing . Such as " If you and your spouse do not want to get pregnant on your honeymoon or one of you are not sure if you have HIV and don't want to be stuck with a child and definitely don't want to go through an abortion, here's what you should do" At least the kids will know what to do if they decided not to wait and yet this could send the message to the kids not to go around and have sex especially while they are still in high school.
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Well, Sarah's daughter was not a grown woman when she got pregnant. She was a 17 year old teen ager. She took the same risk that kids who are taught abstinence are prone to take. And, she is now a part of the statistics showing the rise of teen pregnancies in kids who are taught sex ed from an abstinence only perspective. There have been several studies that show that kids who are taught abstinence have sex at the same age and the same rate as kids who are taught a comprehensive sex ed. They are just less inclined to use birth control if they are taught abstinence. And it makes perfect sense. "Wait until marraige" is a moral dictate. Therefore, there is a judgement attached. Implied in the absitinence only message is if you don't wait until marraige, you are amoral and bad. Therefore, the kids who get the abstinence only message don't want to be judged as bad, so they go out of their way to hide the fact that they are sexually active...which means not going into a store to purchase condoms, not asking parents to take them to the doctor to get birth control, not visiting a clinic to get it on their own, etc. The result is increased teen pregnancies...something that we are again seeing with the abstinence only programs. We are also seeing an increase in STDs as a result.

Teaching about birth control and sexuality is simply imparting knowledge. Abstinence only is adding a moral judgement to that knowledge that has no business being there. Morality is a personal condition.
 
ok we should tell kids, go ahead and have sex, it's a wonderful thing. come to me for birth control. (btw, sex is beautiful when you share it with someone you love)

I think kids are going to hide it from their parents anyway.. it's a privacy thing.

I mean, would you like your mother come with you to your gyn doctor now that you are a grown woman? I don't teens would either. As sex will always be a private matter.

Sadly, people are able to pull this off with smoking and drugs, but can not tell kids to wait on sex.
 
Lighthouse77 said:
ok we should tell kids, oh sex isn't bad... go ahead and have sex.. come to me for birth control.
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No one said that we should tell them to have sex. What I am saying is stop telling them to wait until marraige when it is evident that they will not. As far back as the Kinsey study, it has been shown that people have sex outside of marraige. With people waiting longer and longer to get married, to expect them to wait until marraige is unrealistic.

And, yes, we should tell kids that sex isn't bad....because it isn't. Why lie to them about it? All that does is make them not trust anything you say when they have sex and discover it's is pretty danged good, and you lied to them. And yes, it promotes responsibility if you let them know that they can come to you for assistance in getting birth control. You can also tell them that you would rather they wait until they are mature enough to handle the complications that being sexually active will bring into their life, but if they are dead set on becoming sexually active, you will make sure that they have what they need to protect themselves not just from unwanted pregnancy, but from diseases that can rob them of their life.
 
I'm sorry but it is not unrealistic, people just want to think it is.

(btw, sex is beautiful when you share it with someone you love. It's only bad when you do with someone you don't care about or you regret it)

I think kids are going to hide it from their parents anyway.. it's a privacy thing. At least hide their first time from their parents.

I mean, would you like your mother come with you to your gyn doctor now that you are a grown woman? I don't teens would either. As sex will always be a private matter.

Sadly, people are able to pull this off with smoking and drugs, but can not tell kids to wait on sex.
 
Lighthouse77 said:
ok we should tell kids, go ahead and have sex, it's a wonderful thing. come to me for birth control. (btw, sex is beautiful when you share it with someone you love)

I think kids are going to hide it from their parents anyway.. it's a privacy thing.

I mean, would you like your mother come with you to your gyn doctor now that you are a grown woman? I don't teens would either. As sex will always be a private matter.

Sadly, people are able to pull this off with smoking and drugs, but can not tell kids to wait on sex.
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kids tend to hide it from their parents when their parents are close-minded about it. My friend's gf's mom knows the whole facade about youth and sex which is why her mother told her about protections. The mother knows she is in relationship with my friend which is why she asked her if she wants birth pills and she got some. Now that's one of the right way to deal with unwanted pregnancy and moral issue with abortions.
 
Lighthouse77 said:
I'm sorry but it is not unrealistic, people just want to think it is.

(btw, sex is beautiful when you share it with someone you love)

I think kids are going to hide it from their parents anyway.. it's a privacy thing.

I mean, would you like your mother come with you to your gyn doctor now that you are a grown woman? I don't teens would either. As sex will always be a private matter.

Sadly, people are able to pull this off with smoking and drugs, but can not tell kids to wait on sex.
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And some kids still sneak around to do drugs, smoke, just like they do when they have sex.

That is why they need to be taught, to protect themselves, and to prevent unwanted pregnancy/diseases.
 
If my child come up to me, I tell him it is not too late .. he still wait. everyone make mistakes. I will tell them about diseases and such. I will tell them about birth control too because as far as I'm concern, they can get marry anytime... with or without the legal document. I'll give him/her a driving license at 16 and they can take themselves to their doctor. I'm going to start giving them privacy the moment they start driving.

I guess that's not open-minded enough for kids... not with everyone's attitude toward people with a moral beliefs. I'm a parent, not some sort of kid sister. of course i'll push my moral beliefs on them.. just like all parents do. Some push college on their kids, some push this or that.
 
Babyblue said:
And some kids still sneak around to do drugs, smoke, just like they do when they have sex.

That is why they need to be taught, to protect themselves, and to prevent unwanted pregnancy/diseases.
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There's no such thing as safe smoking, that's why people attitude of "SAY NO TO SMOKING" is acceptable, but not asking kids to wait on sex.

i bet you that if condom did not protect people from diseases, people would support abstiences to this day. btw, why should I push "Condom til marriage" when not everyone will use a condom EVERY single time they have sex. Isn't that unrealistic as abstience? Everyone had unprotected sex in their lifetime. look at all those babies.
 
Jiro said:
kids tend to hide it from their parents when their parents are close-minded about it. My friend's gf's mom knows the whole facade about youth and sex which is why her mother told her about protections. The mother knows she is in relationship with my friend which is why she asked her if she wants birth pills and she got some. Now that's one of the right way to deal with unwanted pregnancy and moral issue with abortions.
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Exactly. If a parent tells a child sex is bad, and then the kid has sex, they aren't going to tell their parents because they feel their parents will judge them as being bad. Tell the kid the truth...sex is great...but you need to be mature enough to handle the complications that can arise from a sexual relationship. Let them make an informed decision.
 
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