PFH, I don't want to go there because I don't really know which behavior you are talking about.
I stopped reading a thread last night when I couldn't watch any more of a grown professional baiting and mocking an unformed 18 YO who has just gone through a traumatic and life-threatening accident that will change the way he interacts with the world forever and who has newly reached out to the deaf community. It's possible that the thread continued to deteriorate (hard to believe as it was pretty gruesome already) and he and/or others behaved very well, very badly, or somewhere in between -- but it makes me ill to review those last few pages, and my stomach needs to be in top form tonight. So I can't speak to his behavior beyond what I've read.
But I do know this: Don't most people who suddenly and permanently lose something they value feel pain? You have a young man suffering pain and loss. And the big concern here -- apparently -- isn't reaching him, a young deaf man, letting him know there's a community that he can be a part of, that this experience is opening up new worlds, that there are others who have experienced the same. The outrage expressed here is that feelings are hurt because he sees his situation as limiting and as the loss of a sense? He hasn't said anything against ASL, rejected Deaf Culture, promoted oralism, invoked AGBell or what have you. And people leaped in to mock his beliefs, his spirituality, his lifestyle choices, his age, his education, his knowledge of the medical field, his passion for music, his fears, and his hopes.
Aren't you a bit stronger than that as a community -- can't you take the unknowing offense of thinking that a sudden loss of hearing at 18 is actually a "loss" and be there for him, make him part of this group, so he has the opportunity to see things from his newly acquired deaf perspective?
