What did you learn today? Part II
- Thread starter Calvin
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Well - it's mostly on how well she takes care of herself from here. It could be anytime now to 10 or 15 years. She come from a family know for their longevity, but she does have all kinds of issues.
DeafCaroline
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rolling7 is probably going to show up to hit me over the head with a Bible and yell at me not to advise people to commit murder when I say this but any chance you could just like sneak up behind her and scare her to death?
I'm kidding! really, rolling7, please don't freak out.
I'm kidding! really, rolling7, please don't freak out.
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Wow...why? What makes her want to do something like that?
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Ah well - I am trying to look at the positive in this situation. Hubby is just trying to act like an ostrich and bury his head. Kids are okay right now and accepting of the whole situation. I am heartbroken, but at least I still have a roof over my head. I have to be thankful for the small things in life I guess. Cherish what I can. I will not let MIL know how much she upset me and I will remember the saying, "Kill them with Kindness" and "Keep a smile on your face, they will wonder what you're up to".
I just can't believe she did this after all the money that was spent on the surveyor and architect. Also, now we get to get all of our stuff back out of storage. Maybe now, I can have it better organized in the garage.
I just can't believe she did this after all the money that was spent on the surveyor and architect. Also, now we get to get all of our stuff back out of storage. Maybe now, I can have it better organized in the garage.
AlleyCat
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So that's it? This construction project is not getting built? I say it's time you guys packed up and moved out. You know I love you, but after reading all this, she is preying on you and taking full advantage of it. My heart goes out to you!
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That is the only advice that makes sense in this situation.
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I have to agree with AlleyCat. It is not worth putting your life and happiness on hold.
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She feels it is hubby's responsibility to be here for her until her dying days. She also has never really liked the fact that he married me and that we moved to Missouri to begin with. She is one to hold grudges for a long time. She lost a chance to take my kids from me years ago due to her stupidity.
She hired an attorney to take them from me since she was sure I was an unfit mother. My kids went to a black Jamaican lady for their baby sitter and a different Jamaican couple are my daughter's God-parents. She is very, very prejudiced. How hubby managed to not be is beyond me. She gave the attorney a list of names and a retainer. After 2 weeks, he returned her money and said she would never get the kids from me at all. The names she gave were her family members and my co-workers. Of all the people he interviewed, none were willing to say she would be better. they all told the attorney to make sure she never got the kids and this included her own family members. She's a real "peach", ya know? NOT!
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Wow...that's a tough one. My heart goes out to you.
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I will try and make the best of it, but thanks everyone.
Some will respect our decision and others will just say that we are wrong, but all in all, we have to do what we can and not push for more. Hubby is going to try and talk to her doctor to see if she is actually totally competent or not. I think she is, but she tends to forget. Her short term memory is also messed up due to medications. Nine different prescription bottles and some are 4 times a day stuff.
Some will respect our decision and others will just say that we are wrong, but all in all, we have to do what we can and not push for more. Hubby is going to try and talk to her doctor to see if she is actually totally competent or not. I think she is, but she tends to forget. Her short term memory is also messed up due to medications. Nine different prescription bottles and some are 4 times a day stuff.
deafbajagal
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Have you seen the will, on paper? I would make sure it was in writing. :/
DeafCaroline
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If it's any consolation, I really believe good things will happen for you eventually. You so deserve some good karma coming your way.
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Yes, we did see it shortly after FIL died. His baby sister was here and wanted to know what was what in his will. His stated all went to MIL unless she predeceased him, then it all went to hubby. If he predeceased him, then it was split 50/50 to my kids and nothing to me. Current will, and I have not taken her to get it changed) states that it will all go to hubby or if he predeceases her then to the kids. She has verbally stated that if we leave, then she will have it changed and all sold at her death and it will all go to charity. It would be split between the church, the Alzheimer's Association and the American Cancer Society.
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I pray for you support team I expect to courage to help support advise explaint to role strong respect to her!, I courage to her I respect to her, my personal I can help you issues I hope be courage to help you value and friends continue keep help solve! I understand huge on group who know friends with Kristina i respect to her! she is very suffer pain on health! I know!
I Pray for you hugs!
deafbajagal
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Please excuse my unsolicited advice, but I would suggest seeking legal counseling regarding your personal situation. There are laws available to protect caregivers, and in this case, it's you. You can draw up a contract to assure that you will be given compensation for your care.
My two older half sisters were promised (and they saw the will with their own eyes) that only my oldest sister would get everything from their grandparents because she agreed to devote herself to caring for her grandmother, which she did. She made so many sacrifices that made me cringe. My other other sister had nothing to do with them and hardly spoke to them for years. When their grandparents died, my oldest sister only got a fraction of what was promised. The lawyer told her she should have had a signed agreement of sorts.
No money is ever worth mental and emotional distress and abuse. Your husband needs to put a stop to it, immediately. It's his place as it's his mother. I wish I could give you a hug.
My two older half sisters were promised (and they saw the will with their own eyes) that only my oldest sister would get everything from their grandparents because she agreed to devote herself to caring for her grandmother, which she did. She made so many sacrifices that made me cringe. My other other sister had nothing to do with them and hardly spoke to them for years. When their grandparents died, my oldest sister only got a fraction of what was promised. The lawyer told her she should have had a signed agreement of sorts.
No money is ever worth mental and emotional distress and abuse. Your husband needs to put a stop to it, immediately. It's his place as it's his mother. I wish I could give you a hug.