Do I Understand?

[Gamer12]

For example, I've got a severe hearing loss and know a little asl. I also am very oral, but yet, the deaf people in my community (note I didn't say "deaf community"?) don't want to have anything to do with me or my hearing dog. The reason is because I'm too oral. Well, excuse me, but from what I've been told by a friend here in town that lives in D.C., (she's also hoh), she has to order her deaf friends' food when they go out to eat. I told her not to, as did her own mother.

welcome to the club. i have the same/different experience. oralists and ciers in my mainstream school told me to get fucking lost because i'm too deaf for them. i'm not kidding. but they went too far on me -- stealing, pushing, kicking, slandering, making up some lies about me and so on and so on -- before i finally stood up to them and beat the shit out of them.

what's ironic about them is that hearing students and i got along very well but yet oralists and ciers themselves did everything in their power to drive me away from the school or my friends away from me.

 

[jillio]

Okay . . . so, since you and jackie are both educated, as well as shel, perhaps there needs to be a consensus to agree to disagree and leave it as that? Research may show that both ways of educating work. Can this be a possibility?

:topic:

 

[Roadrunner]

Sorry I didn't see your question, Roady. Let me explain. When a person is deaf/hoh and someone else is hearing but wants to be deaf/hoh, they can't. Even when they work with people who are deaf/hoh, they can't experience it.

Ahh...then apparently such comment was worded wrong.


"....But, being deaf/hoh is for someone else, not you, to understand." could be worded like this: '..But, being deaf/hoh is for someone else, not you, to be able to experience firsthand, it's impossible.'


Also...pssttt...as I recall, you have mentioned to someone once before not to be called/named petey...hmm...and now you're calling me 'Roady'....

Tsk tsk--




~RR

 

[deafskeptic]

But, at the same time, jillio, there's no one concensus (sp?) in the deaf/hoh communities. For example, I've got a severe hearing loss and know a little asl. I also am very oral, but yet, the deaf people in my community (note I didn't say "deaf community"?) don't want to have anything to do with me or my hearing dog. The reason is because I'm too oral. Well, excuse me, but from what I've been told by a friend here in town that lives in D.C., (she's also hoh), she has to order her deaf friends' food when they go out to eat. I told her not to, as did her own mother.

I'm fairly oral myself and I'm very PSE/SEE in sign but I try to see it from others pov and not just my own. I've had some problems with some members in the community. Shrug. Can't do much about those people. Just gotta find those who are accepting of you. One of my biggest supporters of me getting a CI is Deaf herself.

 

[highlands]

Inthe thread, District Files Appeal Against Deaf Student, post # 1401, it was said that I do not seek to understand the deaf community at all. I replied that I would leave that question to the deaf members of AD to answer.

So here's the question....do I, as a hearing person, attempt to gain an understanding of deafness from the deaf perspective?

Honest answers, please, as I consider this a learning experience.

Although I do not share the same opinions with you, you have always tried to understand d(D)eaf world and you seem to learn a lot.. I notice that you mostly speak like a Deaf who love sign and its culture. Not all people have same ground and opinions here. There are many different fractions.

Stay here

 

[jackiesolorzano]

Jillo be honest with yourself. You do not seek to understand anybody's experiences. You seek to find people that will agree with what you agree with. You seek to find confirmation of your beliefs of what you think is right. An anybody who disagrees with you is wrong in your eyes.

These are my exact words. You try to find people that agree with you,. You do not try to understand people unless you think they believe in what you belief. This is what I said. I know that you have never tried to understand my point or views because they differ then yours. I know you started this thread and I am not going to argue with you but if you start thread based on something I said then quote me correctly.

 

[jillio]

Firstly, I did not quote you.

Secondly, one can assume "anybody" to be deaf people as well, unless of course you are implying that deaf people are "nobody".

Thirdly, it is not your opinion that is being sought in this thread. It specifically asks for responses from deaf posters. To get another opinion from a hearing person regarding the deaf would be redundant.

Fourthly, I do understand your point of view. It is the same point of view held by oralists everywhere. You mistake disagreeing with your point of view with not understanding your point of view.

And fifthly, I am very glad that you are not going to argue with me. Fromthat I can assume that you will stop responding to my posts in an argumentative way.

 

[pek1]

Ahh...then apparently such comment was worded wrong.


"....But, being deaf/hoh is for someone else, not you, to understand." could be worded like this: '..But, being deaf/hoh is for someone else, not you, to be able to experience firsthand, it's impossible.'


Also...pssttt...as I recall, you have mentioned to someone once before not to be called/named petey...hmm...and now you're calling me 'Roady'....

Tsk tsk--




~RR

I'm sorry, Road Runner. I promise not to call you that ever again.

 

[pek1]

I'm fairly oral myself and I'm very PSE/SEE in sign but I try to see it from others pov and not just my own. I've had some problems with some members in the community. Shrug. Can't do much about those people. Just gotta find those who are accepting of you. One of my biggest supporters of me getting a CI is Deaf herself.

deafskeptic,

I understand. I interviewed a man for a newspaper that, quite a number of years prior, had been in a car accident and less than a week later, woke up one morning and found his hearing totally gone. Later on, he married and had kids. Shortly before he received a CI, his kids didn't even believe their dad was deaf. So, after seeing and interviewing him, as well as reading some stories here, particularly jackie's and yours, I support CI's whole heartedly. Your story, by the way, nearly ripped the insides out of me and when I read your story, it had to sink in overnight before I made a comment. You, my friend, are one brave and strong person, and I commend you highly.

 

[jillio]

deafskeptic,

I understand. I interviewed a man for a newspaper that, quite a number of years prior, had been in a car accident and less than a week later, woke up one morning and found his hearing totally gone. Later on, he married and had kids. Shortly before he received a CI, his kids didn't even believe their dad was deaf. So, after seeing and interviewing him, as well as reading some stories here, particularly jackie's and yours, I support CI's whole heartedly. Your story, by the way, nearly ripped the insides out of me and when I read your story, it had to sink in overnight before I made a comment. You, my friend, are one brave and strong person, and I commend you highly.

Again, this thread is not about support for or non-support for CIs. Let's not reduce it to the same old argument about CIs.

 

[shel90]

Yes, u understand and no, u don't know what it is like to live a life as a deaf person. U really do understand the visual needs of dhh children especially the importance of language devlopment during the deaf child's first 5 years of life and how those years impact the child's academic future.

I wish I can explain more cuz I have a lot more to say but I am so exhausted and busy with returning to work and starting with my new class in addition with the responsibilities of a new house and kids. Internet is still not working.

Maybe next month when things settle down at work and with the house, I will be on more.

 

[shel90]

Yes, u understand and no, u don't know what it is like to live a life as a deaf person. U really do understand the visual needs of dhh children especially the importance of language devlopment during the deaf child's first 5 years of life and how those years impact the child's academic future.

I wish I can explain more cuz I have a lot more to say but I am so exhausted and busy with returning to work and starting with my new class in addition with the responsibilities of a new house and kids. Internet is still not working.

Maybe next month when things settle down at work and with the house, I will be on more.

 

[pek1]

Again, this thread is not about support for or non-support for CIs. Let's not reduce it to the same old argument about CIs.

Duly noted, jillio. I made the comment to deafskeptic.

 

[pek1]

?? I find that statement almost insulting..

I wasn't being insulting, just pointing out to jillio that I respect her.

 

[pek1]

i'm not questioning your opinion but i have to wonder -- we, deaf people, are not allowed to understand the hearing politics, entertainment and dramas too? or we just "cannot" understand them either?

Totally different. When people speak and we cannot hear, we can "hear" them speak by either hearing aids or interpreters. We can understand what they're saying. Sure, they can hear us or see us sign, but they can hear, we can't. They can understand what we're saying. In other words, we can't experience "normal" hearing and they can't experience or even know what the experience is like not being able to hear.

 

[jillio]

I wasn't being insulting, just pointing out to jillio that I respect her.

All due respect, Pete, I think the objection was to your remark saying that it was for others, but not for me to understand. The way it was phrased it sounded as if you were saying that hearing people, or me in particular, had no business even trying to understand the deaf experience. I believe that's what rr, gamer12, jasper and I were referring to.

 

[jillio]

Yes, u understand and no, u don't know what it is like to live a life as a deaf person. U really do understand the visual needs of dhh children especially the importance of language devlopment during the deaf child's first 5 years of life and how those years impact the child's academic future.

I wish I can explain more cuz I have a lot more to say but I am so exhausted and busy with returning to work and starting with my new class in addition with the responsibilities of a new house and kids. Internet is still not working.

Maybe next month when things settle down at work and with the house, I will be on more.

Thanks for taking time to come in and post a response. Looking forward to you coming back for an extended stay.

 

[Tousi]

Yes, Jillio understands and continually seeks to understand. And Pek, for what it's worth adding to your evolving (lol) opinions, did you know that Jillio has a deaf son?

 

[Cloggy]

Inthe thread, District Files Appeal Against Deaf Student, post # 1401, it was said that I do not seek to understand the deaf community at all. I replied that I would leave that question to the deaf members of AD to answer.

So here's the question....do I, as a hearing person, attempt to gain an understanding of deafness from the deaf perspective?

Honest answers, please, as I consider this a learning experience.

From everything you write, you go through great deals to understand the Deaf community...
And when one wants to learn signlanguage perfectly in order to comunicate with your son, it's only natural to become as much involved as possible.

But why do you need to ask the question.... Why the need to get it verified by others??
If you know... isn't that enough... Do you need verification from others?

 

[Cloggy]

Jillio,.............
But . . . you are a hearing person. You may think you have the tiger by the tail, but you don't know all of the story. You see and read our stories as a third party, never the first party. ...........

Being the mother of a deaf child.... wouldn't that be "second party"?
Who is, according to your counting, the "second party". (CODA perhaps?)