your childhood about deaf/hoh issues

simple question

  • No

    Votes: 16 55.2%

  • Yes

    Votes: 8 27.6%

  • Sometimes

    Votes: 4 13.8%

  • Others ~ explain

    Votes: 1 3.4%
  • Total voters
    29
DeafCaroline said:
You have a point there. I was called a bitch at a party a week ago. Some guy apparently was trying to hit on me when I didn't see him standing next to me and he went up to the host of the party (who is a very good friend of mine) and said "what's up with her? Why is she being such a snobby bitch?"

When he told him why, then he was like "oh!" but you know what, i'm glad that happened because people need to stop assuming the entire planet can hear and that there's a good reason why some people don't respond so maybe the next time he'll think twice.

Another woman yelled at me for not hearing her ring her bicycle bell as she was coming up behind me on the sidewalk. She crashed into me and of course it was all my fault.

I told her that she shouldn't assume everyone can hear. Maybe she learned her lesson.
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I get that often in a grocery store. I would be looking at what I want to purchase. People behind me would yell!! Excuse me!! In an irratated voice. I know the person must have softly said it a few times before getting frusterated with me not moving :giggle: I wear my hair up often and so I would point at my hearing aids and they would immediately apologize to me. Some get so embarassed and turn the other way and start walking. :lol:

I just shake my head. It is no ones fault really. They do not know we are deaf..and we do not know they are speaking to us.
 
No one's fault at all but I think it's important for them to realize that some people ARE deaf and that they need to be more careful about making assumptions next time someone is "ignoring" them. I have to admit when dealing with a particularly unpleasant person that I do get a bit of pleasure at seeing their guilty reaction when I explain I'm deaf.
 
DeafCaroline said:
No one's fault at all but I think it's important for them to realize that some people ARE deaf and that they need to be more careful about making assumptions next time someone is "ignoring" them. I have to admit when dealing with a particularly unpleasant person that I do get a bit of pleasure at seeing their guilty reaction when I explain I'm deaf.
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Some people are deaf, some actually ignore, some simply do not care and are rude. A person wanting to get by can not distinguish the difference. People will continue to assume people are rude and ignoring you. Especially if they have never been exposed to a deaf person.

I do not get worked up over it. Which is why I do not mind if people tell others I am deaf.
 
I don't get worked up about it either. Life is too short for that. I used to be very angry but when I was 27, I consciously made the decision to get that chip off my shoulder, put it in a box and bury it deep in the closet. I wanted to be happy and enjoy life and in order to do that, I had to change my attitude big time.
Nor do I assume everyone will know better, but I do hope that those who yelled at me will think twice next time and if they don't, well, that says alot about their character. Nor am i ashamed about being Deaf nor do I feel compelled to hide it. I have very long hair but it's always in a ponytail. My hearing aids are fully visible and obvious. But on the other hand, I don't feel compelled to introduce myself to everyone as "I'm Caroline and I'm deaf" excepting when I feel it's absolutely necessary to do so.
 
I do no introduce myself as being deaf to everyone either. I mainly do it in social gatherings so people are aware.

If someone else tells a person that I am deaf, it does not bother me. For an example. I would be at the store with my teenage daughter. Some one would try to get pass me. My daughter would say she is deaf, and then tap me to let me know that the lady wants by. Simple as that.

It does not bother me like it does with some people. It is not like everywhere I go, my daughter runs around saying she is deaf!!! she is deaf!!!
 
People will not learn about deafness if people do not share it with others. It creates awareness. IMO.

My parents raised me to not hide my deafness and at one point as a child I did hide my hearing aids with my hair. Then I realize I am not hurting anyone but myself by hiding it. So that is when I decided to let people see my hearing aids and ask questions. Of course certain children and adults can be cruel. I learned to ignore the idiots and weed them out of my life.
 
that's great, I have no problems with people seeing my hearing aids or asking me questions. I'm glad it's different for you than for me because I find if I say Im deaf right off the bat, they don't ask questions but walk away which kinda defeats the whole "promoting awareness" thing. But then again, I find Americans far more friendly and open than Canadians so it could also be a cultural thing.
 
DeafCaroline said:
that's great, I have no problems with people seeing my hearing aids or asking me questions. I'm glad it's different for you than for me because I find if I say Im deaf right off the bat, they don't ask questions but walk away which kinda defeats the whole "promoting awareness" thing. But then again, I find Americans far more friendly and open than Canadians so it could also be a cultural thing.
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I am glad to see you here. It has helped me a lot to share stories. I am not saying I had a perfect life growing up. I just look back and find it wasn't so bad after all. I have had the teasing and was picked on as well. I was also a scrapper, that did not take crap from people. It was the boys, I would beat up. Other girls knew better to bother me :lol:

I've had my moments where I would break down and cry in frusteration. etc. I'm sure we all have.
 
Babyblue said:
I am glad to see you here. It has helped me a lot to share stories. I am not saying I had a perfect life growing up. I just look back and find it wasn't so bad after all. I have had the teasing and was picked on as well. I was also a scrapper, that did not take crap from people. It was the boys, I would beat up. Other girls knew better to bother me :lol:

I've had my moments where I would break down and cry in frusteration. etc. I'm sure we all have.
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I'm sure we've all dealt with that! My older sister told me that when I was in grade 3, boys in sixth grade were warning each other to stay away from me after I beat the crap out of a sixth grader when he came to me during recess, shoved me hard enough to make me fall on my ass and said "you're ugly." "Why?" "cause you're "death" and retarded." Oh boy, I did not take that kindly at all. Let's just say afterwards, his mother actually called mine to complain about me. Hahaha!

I do have to say though that as much as i wish I had a happier childhood, I am glad that my grade school experiences taught me to be tough as nails. It served me well in life.
 
I have been HoH since birth, and I was always told to "act normal" because of that I learned to just nod my head when talked to if i couldn't read their lips... my mom always kept my hair long from the time I first got my HA's, to hide them. Its hard, its still hard. My parents still aren't quite ok when we go out and I can't understand someone, so i ask 3 or 4 times for them to repeat themselves, then eventually just hand them a piece of paper and a pen. They are coming along, but still not quite ok with it. I keep my hair short now, so people can see my HA's and so they know I can not always (more often than not can't) hear them.
 
as far as I can remember I didnt have sign language till i was 5, and before that was just a big blur of garbled speech..crankling hearing aids...so werid..and then was cut off from Deaf unit when i was 8 thenremoved form that school when i was 9...it was strangely 'ok' but the pain was hard to describe, even if i couldnt feel it because i though no body else has the same pain so i was deluded to beliebe it was no pain just sacrifying time for speech to be like hearing adults when i grow up, took long long LONG time to 'wake up' to this, even now its stil too much to try look back see how i felt, i get massive scare...
 
In my early teens, I'd take my hearing aid off before I go inside a gas station,movie theater,movie rental place,etc.... Not all the time...

Today,I love my hearing aid. I am bald and most ppl can see my aid. I think I am so cool b/c not very many people are bald and wear an aid in his left ear. :) It is all about confidence. I think it is important for people to see your hearing aid(s) so they can have your full attention.
 
DeafCaroline said:
You have a point there. I was called a bitch at a party a week ago. Some guy apparently was trying to hit on me when I didn't see him standing next to me and he went up to the host of the party (who is a very good friend of mine) and said "what's up with her? Why is she being such a snobby bitch?"

When he told him why, then he was like "oh!" but you know what, i'm glad that happened because people need to stop assuming the entire planet can hear and that there's a good reason why some people don't respond so maybe the next time he'll think twice.

Another woman yelled at me for not hearing her ring her bicycle bell as she was coming up behind me on the sidewalk. She crashed into me and of course it was all my fault.

I told her that she shouldn't assume everyone can hear. Maybe she learned her lesson.
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This happen to me too , I was not called a bitch but a guy was hitting on me at party when I was younger and he asked the host what was 'wrong' with me! the guy lost interests in me when he find out I was HOH! I had people get mad at me b/c I did not answer them! A woman was trying to ask me driving direction , and I had Finlay with me and I did not want go into the street with my dog, I told the woman I could not hear her and she got really pissed of at me for not helping her! What a bitch she was, I hope she got lost!
 
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