The ex bashing/discussion thread

posts from hell said:
Yeah, not many people do. I pay $43 a month on average. I have it prorated though out the year.

I have energy saving lights (these florescent sprialy thingy) in every socket, I don't watch TV, my AC/Heater is energy efficient, I also leave one light in the kitchen on all night. other than that, everything else is off.

During the day my thermo is set at 66 degrees, and I am under a sleeping bag keeping warm atm.

BTW for the rest of your post .... O.o!
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I wish my electricity bill was that low. No matter what we do, it never goes under $150 a month. One winter month two years ago, it went up to around $420. I flipped out. We made a lot of changes around the house to make it more energy efficient and since then, it has never gone over $300. *knock on wood*
 
Dixie said:
My ex had the utilities turned on in my name without my consent. He made sure I never saw a single bill and claimed that he was paying them. He also set double standards such as it was OK for him to go through my mail, but it was federal offense if I went through his mail. It was OK for him to smoke, but not OK for me. Well back to the utilities, he had claimed he was paying the bills and I could have only assumed so because we had electricity. After I kicked him out I call to have them put over into my name and the response I got was "Ma'am these utilities are already in your name and you are behind by 1,200 dollars." I came unglued. I knew right then I had just lost my home. There was no way I could afford to pay that. I had no money, nothing. My parents couldn't help either. So I had no choice but to move back in with them.
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Sounds like my dad when it comes to my mail.
 
rockin'robin said:
This is mental abuse. It affects your self-esteem, self-worth and pride. Been there, too! Took me 13 months to get out of that relationship, too long!...But I was young....now I know the signals....what to look for.
Good luck in court.
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I'm with you on this one. Shel, you have my support. :hug:
 
shel90 said:
I wish my electricity bill was that low. No matter what we do, it never goes under $150 a month. One winter month two years ago, it went up to around $420. I flipped out. We made a lot of changes around the house to make it more energy efficient and since then, it has never gone over $300. *knock on wood*
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Buy a kill-a-watt meter, costs around $20-30. It measures the amount of electricity a device is draining, then with this you can calculate wattage and bill costs using multiplication with kwh - should state on your bill or somewhere how much they charge.

I found out some things plugged in even while off, like the PS3 is draining ~20+ watts every second.. a light being turned on basically.
 
naisho said:
Buy a kill-a-watt meter, costs around $20-30. It measures the amount of electricity a device is draining, then with this you can calculate wattage and bill costs using multiplication with kwh - should state on your bill or somewhere how much they charge.

I found out some things plugged in, like the PS3 is draining ~20+ watts every second.. a light being turned on basically.
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So, even if the game console is turned off, it it is still draining electricity while being plugged in?
 
deafskeptic said:
I'm with you on this one. Shel, you have my support. :hug:
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Thanks DS and RR!

I reached my breaking point and he doesnt scare me anymore unless he has his connections in Mexico go after me! :lol:
 
rockin'robin said:
I can't see anyone having a "business meeting" at a topless bar!....If you want to own one, that's ur business. Many of them get raided....as for you "chilling" at a topless bar, that's OK too...and maybe ur "woman" would accept it....dunno about "ur wife."....
I took my marriage vows seriously, PFH....even the divorse judge sided with me. I took absolutely nothing from my ex...all I wanted was my freedom, a divorse. And he was a wealthy man, I could have taken him to the cleaners, as my lawyer was encouraging me to do so, I declined, and told him to take his $$ and spend it at topless bars and when he got tired of them, to stick the $$ up his arse....To this day, he's a very unhappy, alcoholic man......
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I know a few people who do have business meetings at topless bars. I asked them how do they focus on the meetings while there are naked women dancing and they said that the environment relaxes them and enables them to think more clearly. :hmm:
 
Dixie said:
And I'm having a hard time your electric bill doesn't come to 1200/yr. Doing the math the average bill during that time should have been $200/month.
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Mine is around $360 a year tops. The most expensive is my pc's energy drain, that measures around 60 watts at idle.

But while I stayed in CA it costs more. I believe it's around 13 cents per kwh, compared to 5 cents ish on the eastern side.
 
shel90 said:
So, even if the game console is turned off, it it is still draining electricity while being plugged in?
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You'd be surprised! Happens with other appliances too, but it depends mostly on what.
 
naisho said:
I found out some things plugged in even while off, like the PS3 is draining ~20+ watts every second.. a light being turned on basically.
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Turn it off in the back to reduce the draining.
 
shel90 said:
I wish my electricity bill was that low. No matter what we do, it never goes under $150 a month. One winter month two years ago, it went up to around $420. I flipped out. We made a lot of changes around the house to make it more energy efficient and since then, it has never gone over $300. *knock on wood*
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just do what my ex's mom did.... unplug everything. laptop charger too even if you're not charging your laptop. she even unplug the room lamp, dvd player, etc.
 
Dixie said:
If you lived with my ex you would have believed it. The house we were in was a 3 bedroom one bath with a den and laundry room. From the information I was able to obtain he had wired around the meter box without my knowledge and had a fake tag placed on the box which he got from his brother that worked for the electric company. This electricity had been bootlegged from September up through the middle of February when I threw him out. He also had wasteful habits such as leaving the TV on 24/7 (he claimed he could not sleep without the TV on). One night I woke up just absolutely freezing my ass off. It was 50 degrees in the house and the heater was running full blast. I got to looking and he was downstairs in the den sleeping with the window right above the couch wide open. He claimed he was hot. He also ran the A/C full blast at all times in the spring and summer.

And I'm having a hard time your electric bill doesn't come to 1200/yr. Doing the math the average bill during that time should have been $200/month. As I said he was extremely wasteful. He could be wasteful because he knew in the end he wasn't the one to have to pay for it anyway. If I had solid proof of what he had done you can bet your bottom dollar I would have taken him to court. Because of what he did my credit score is ruined. Thankfully we were able to talk with the electric company and explain to them the situation and the deal we came to was that there would be a flag placed on the account and that his name and social security number was recorded and placed into their records so that should he try to obtain an account with them in another location he would not be able to do so. However on my end of it, I can never live in that specific address again without having that electric bill paid in full, but I would be able to obtain electric utilities in my name only if I lived at another address. The reason being is because I had obtained benefit of the stolen electricity at that specific address.

At least now I have better sense in:
1.) never fully trust your spouse with personal information - it could come back to bite you. (he somehow managed to use my SSN to get the utilities turned on in my name without my consent)
2.) Check with your utility company regularly if your spouse is claiming the bill is paid and yet you never see a bill come in the mail. Don't just assume that if the lights are on that everything's fine. Had I done this I probably would have caught it early while it was still manageable.
3.) If your the breadwinner of the couple make sure all utilities are in your name and only you can be allowed to speak with the utility company regarding the account. If your spouse wants to help with the bills, ask for cash in your hand this way you are not stuck with a bad check.

After all the shit my ex-pulled I have a hard time believing in marriage. I'm thinking I am probably better off unmarried.
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I just thought of something... late fees. That's probably how you got $$$$$ added to electric bill.
 
Jiro said:
I just thought of something... late fees. That's probably how you got $$$$$ added to electric bill.
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That's what I was thinking when I found out the total was so high. This happened 6 years ago and I'm still trying to find a way back on my own. But between getting laid off from Petit Jean when it closed down and recently getting terminated from Tyson, I'm halfway afraid to do it knowing that no job is for certain especially if you are living paycheck to paycheck. What irritates me is I was making $9.50/hr at Tyson but yet I could not receive assistance because I was making too much per hour to get assistance, even though I was in school. I wish I could find a way in which I could just go to school full time and get this degree finished so I can get a decent job that will allow me to put my life back together again.
 
naisho said:
You'd be surprised! Happens with other appliances too, but it depends mostly on what.
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We unplug most everything at night, only due to the awesome storms we get. My computer stays plugged in but only because of Microsoft updates. MIL's electric bill for having 6 people in the house and only a wall unit A/C hovers around $175 a month. My deep freeze is always kept 3/4 full. If it's not food, it's bags of ice or jugs of water to fill the space. Water heater is used a bunch, 6 showers daily and a dishwasher daily. Then there's the 22 loads of laundry in cold water weekly, but we do use a dryer. MIL will not allow a clothesline. (too unsightly)
 
OK today's rant:

I went over to help a friend pack for her move to her new apartment, when I get a frantic call from my son. He had a half day from school and arrived home to no one home & a locked house. So, my friend and I race over to get him.
OK, crisis averted. I call my ex to tell him what happened and that our son will stay with me until he gets home from work, even though I am not supposed to my son tonight. We help her & her fiance pack some before her own twin daughters come from school. And to show their appreciation they took us out to dinner.
We get my son back to his father's house at around 8:45pm. As he tries the front door we find that it's locked, I whip out my cell and call the house. Nothing. There's no one home AGAIN!. This time I unlock the door, and since my son is 13 I feel he can be left alone. He went straight to bed.

If the reverse had happened. I would have CPS on me so fast my head would spin. The thing is, they could have called me & I would have brought our son home with me, if he had to do some last minute Christmas shopping.
 
Yep sounds like something my ex likely would have done. I'm just glad I have full custody of my DD and that he has nothing to do with her. The more I realize this the more I believe if he had joint custody he would make it incredibly difficult for us. But he just flat out ran out on us. His loss.

BTW - if your ex is the inconsiderate one, he is the one losing because your son is seeing what his dad is really like.
 
Dixie said:
BTW - if your ex is the inconsiderate one, he is the one losing because your son is seeing what his dad is really like.
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Good point! It would explain why Juli and her son's very close. He, obviously, knew she is the only one he can turn to for help and the like.
 
Miss-Delectable said:
Good point! It would explain why Juli and her son's very close. He, obviously, knew she is the only one he can turn to for help and the like.
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Probably a good thing. My father did not model good behavior for me when I went to visit him. As a result, I've realized that one way to be a good parent will be to not do what he did.
 
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