"Wall, After Wall, After Wall" by Gerilee Gustason
"It's amazing to me how much anger and bitterness seems to be coming out of deaf persons... and some hearing persons who've taken up the 'cause.' these days. For several years I've been trying to explain to parents where some of this comes from, to help them understand the frustrations that many deaf adults grew up with. I tell them, for example:
not to expect that all deaf adult will be pleased to see them signing with their deaf child. If their own parents did not sign to them- we must remember that hearing parents who signed were very, very rare even fifteen years ago- you would think they would be delighted to see hearing parents now signing to their children, whether they were signing ASL, SEE or the sign language of Mars. But this is often not the case, and hearing parents are attacked for signing anything except ASL...
Why are not more deaf adults delighted to see parents signing, no matter what? Could it be that seeing deaf children communicating with their parents, their family, brings back too many bitter memories of their own childhood where they could not communicate freely? Does that hurt so much that they strike out against the parents they see today? Are they taking out their anger and bitterness against their own family against these families? This could be understandable, but hardly fair..and very, very confusing to present day families who are doing well to sign anything, given the incredible number of pressures in modern day America. But it is, to me inexcusable for anyone to stand in front of a group of deaf students and tell them they cannot communicate with their parents, or to tell parents what a disservice they are doing to their children to sign English to them...
It would be foolish and dishonest to deny that many deaf adults have major problems with English. Of course they do. They couldn't hear it. They couldn't lipread it- it's a horrible language to lipread! Everything seems to look like something else.
But I wonder if there may not be more to it than that? For some adults, I wonder if they look at todays deaf students and feel jealous? For someone whose English papers bled, from someone who didn't want to go home from a residential school because there was no one to communicate with. I wonder if it doesn't make them even more bitter to look at some of todays deaf students? These kids have excellent English. They can communicate with their families...over half the families of profoundly deaf children at least try to sign. These kids can communicate effectively with hearing people...and deaf people too!...
....
Let's get the focus back on the uniqueness of each child, and on each and every deaf and hard of hearing child. Let's stop teaching intolerance of differences. Hearing people are not the enemy.
Deaf and hard of hearing people who sign English are not the enemy. As far as our field is concerned right now, I think Pogo was right when he said, 'We have met the enemy, and he is us.'"
Lots more to the article, just pulled a few pieces that I thought were relevant.