Observation

[jillio]

Then why did you specifically say that "oralism in any form does not help our children"? That would mean that the oral route does not help our children, therefore if you choose oralism, you are not helping deaf children. Which means if you want to help the children, you must choose something other than oralism.....

Stop trying so hard to make everything say what you want it to say. Perhaps then you will be able to grasp the broader meaning. The problem is not my posts... the vast majority understands exactly what I am saying. It is just a couple of hearing parents that don't.

Now get back to the topic. I did not create this thread to feed your narcissism. Think about someone else for a change and come up with some solutions to the problem or don't post.

 

[faire_jour]

You really are a piece of work. That was an affirmative statement.:roll:

Yeah, because you are never sarcastic about a person who grew up orally and isn't angry or frustrated by it...

 

[Banjo]

There are parents who scream at their adult children to use their voices.

Is this how a parent should treat an adult child?

 

[faire_jour]

Stop trying so hard to make everything say what you want it to say. Perhaps then you will be able to grasp the broader meaning. The problem is not my posts... the vast majority understands exactly what I am saying. It is just a couple of hearing parents that don't.

No, the majority kiss your butt.

There is no misunderstanding. You are against CIs in children and spoken language as the mode of communication at school or at home.

 

[Beowulf]

LOL! What I meant is -- advocating something that REMAINS in an eternal effect from somewhere with STRONG influence, becomes a "standard of procedure" EVERYWHERE. Providing effective options to those who seek for help and providing support for parents who are so defiant to being "something different".

I was just pulling your leg, I knew what you meant. The thing is, ain't no such thing. Someone somewhere is doing all the right things, with pure Love to boot, but there are minorities and majorities screaming at each other loud enough to drown out the person's message. In the end, that person will be long gone before everyone lives in perfect harmony. Such is life, huh?

 

[jillio]

Yeah, because you are never sarcastic about a person who grew up orally and isn't angry or frustrated by it...

The thread is entitled "Observation" and the OP is sufficiently explanatory of the topic. This is not a thread called "FJ vents her anger and turns everything into a battle." We already have plenty of those.

 

[jillio]

There are parents who scream at their adult children to use their voices.

Is this how a parent should treat an adult child?

Of course not. And if they are doing it to their adult children, think what they did to them when they were children.

 

[jillio]

No, the majority kiss your butt.

There is no misunderstanding. You are against CIs in children and spoken language as the mode of communication at school or at home.

Go away. This kind of verbal abuse and personal attacks is the very reason that people dislike you. I refuse to tolerate your behavior in my thread.

 

[Mrs Bucket]

There are parents who scream at their adult children to use their voices.

Is this how a parent should treat an adult child?

Never.

It saddens me when some parents think they can still discipline their Deaf children even when they are independent Deaf adults, productive of making their own life choices/decisions.

It is those "control freak" tendencies that some parents will never give up because they do not see their children for who they are. They see the disability - the deafness- in the children as an excuse to carry on the disciplining into the much older years.

Shameful, IMHO.

 

[LinuxGold]

No, the majority kiss your butt.

There is no misunderstanding. You are against CIs in children and spoken language as the mode of communication at school or at home.

Faire_Jour, Oh, Faire_Jour...

What you are doing with your child is the right thing to do. As long as your child are able to learn, relate and function on her own, that technique is for keeps. Parenting is a hard job, well done, Faire_Jour. Don't let anybody tell you any different.

We are just throwing darts, theorizing and things like that. Those who personally attack you or me or anybody are just mere fools. No two snowflakes are exactly the same, therefore techniques ALWAYS differ. Don't take them to heart, O heart!

 

[jillio]

Never.

It saddens me when some parents think they can still discipline their Deaf children even when they are independent Deaf adults, productive of making their own life choices/decisions.

It is those "control freak" tendencies that some parents will never give up because they do not see their children for who they are. They see the disability - the deafness- in the children as an excuse to carry on the disciplining into the much older years.

Shameful, IMHO.

Just more of that paternal attitude we see from the audists. It is truly a shame.

 

[Banjo]

Never.

It saddens me when some parents think they can still discipline their Deaf children even when they are independent Deaf adults, productive of making their own life choices/decisions.

It is those "control freak" tendencies that some parents will never give up because they do not see their children for who they are. They see the disability - the deafness- in the children as an excuse to carry on the disciplining into the much older years.

Shameful, IMHO.

Exactly. It's a dangerous characteristic trait to carry on throughout the years. It can put a strain on the relationships between the deaf person and its family members and friends.

People need to become more considerate of the child's needs than their own.

 

[Mrs Bucket]

Go away. This kind of verbal abuse and personal attacks is the very reason that people dislike you. I refuse to tolerate your behavior in my thread.

Well said.

It's very interesting to see where FJ's true colours are coming and her "supporters" aren't coming to her defence.

Hate much, FJ?

 

[Mrs Bucket]

Just more of that paternal attitude we see from the audists. It is truly a shame.

I agree with you there.

Exactly. It's a dangerous characteristic trait to carry on throughout the years. It can put a strain on the relationships between the deaf person and its family members and friends.

People need to become more considerate of the child's needs than their own.

Some people will learn and some people just don't learn. They breeze through life through trial and error without learning which is sad.

The paternalistic attitude jillio mentioned, it is very dangerous if not nipped right in the bud.

 

[Beowulf]

Well said.

It's very interesting to see where FJ's true colours are coming and her "supporters" aren't coming to her defence.

Hate much, FJ?

Awwww, Mrs Bucket. I keep in mind that she is a human being and I instinctively feel like jumping to her defense. She is a mother who loves her daughter, so let's take it easy on her, okay?

 

[faire_jour]

Wirelessly posted

Go away. This kind of verbal abuse and personal attacks is the very reason that people dislike you. I refuse to tolerate your behavior in my thread.

Well said.

It's very interesting to see where FJ's true colours are coming and her "supporters" aren't coming to her defence.

Hate much, FJ?

not at all. It is a pity that so many can't get past their own history and issues to see that so many parents today ARE doing the right things, that kids are thriving.

i'm am truly sorry that so many of you were hurt in the past, by either straight out abuse, or, more often, neglect. I swear that i hear you, and i REFUSE to allow those things to happen to my daughter. Her life isn't, and won't ever be like that. She has 2 languages, involved, educated parents, the best professionals, and a supportive Deaf community. I may not do what you would do, but that doesn't make my choices wrong for MY child.

 

[LinuxGold]

Wirelessly posted



not at all. It is a pity that so many can't get past their own history and issues to see that so many parents today ARE doing the right things, that kids are thriving.

i'm am truly sorry that so many of you were hurt in the past, by either straight out abuse, or, more often, neglect.

I don't recall us saying that we are hurt? But understood why you are apologetic about it. We're fine, really. =)

I swear that i hear you, and i REFUSE to allow those things to happen to my daughter. Her life isn't, and won't ever be like that. She has 2 languages, involved, educated parents, the best professionals, and a supportive Deaf community.

A good move and you are in a good community! Well done! Seriously, I mean it.

I may not do what you would do, but that doesn't make my choices wrong for MY child.

Then do not do it. Angrily attacking us about it will only put more unnecessary friction between us.

Just give us something that WORKS for you and your daughter, we might need it for others! Give us your opinion, we might or might not agree, but as long as it works, do not worry about what we think.

 

[Mrs Bucket]

Awwww, Mrs Bucket. I keep in mind that she is a human being and I instinctively feel like jumping to her defense. She is a mother who loves her daughter, so let's take it easy on her, okay?

Beo! I get you and your good intentions. Just like LG mentioned, the angry rebuttals needs to stop and I agree.

Angrily attacking us about it will only put more unnecessary friction between us.

 

[Megan8987]

Yep, that was me.:P

Ok good, I got it right

 

[deafdyke]

Well, some of the deaf children did succeed taking the non-Deaf route, then what...
There are always the outliers. We are talking about the accepted consequences for the majority. One or two exceptions do not discount what has been found in the majority. So...you may be different from the findings. So what? Still doesn't change the findings

. Exactly.....and a lot of the non Deaf sucesses can be explained by sociological factors.

It is a pity that so many can't get past their own history and issues to see that so many parents today ARE doing the right things, that kids are thriving.

Sorry faire joure but it does seem like the kids are superfically thriving. Yes, some populations are doing really well. But, this generation still has HUGE HUGE social emotional defiects. There are some kids who are basicly "got friends and are only minimal sped accomondations" but you're missing the fact that even the superstars are struggling with social issues. That is a major major thing. You're also missing that while CI kids are doing well.....they are still not doing as well as hearing kids. They're on the level of hoh kids.
That means that some kids are basicly HLAA style hoh....Heck there are hoh folks who don't really identify with ASL and Deaf culture.....but it's very dependent. Heck even a lot of AG Bad kids end up going to NTID. Did you know that at the Clarke School conference BOTH Gally AND NTID had booths?!?!
You really are missing out on the fact that we're venting about oralism and mainstreaming in GENERAL. It is NOT about you! You're chosing to see the "oral sucesses" through rose colored glasses! I also really think that if you'd been in a state with a really strong Deaf School, with a qualified experianced speech therapist you'd be RAVING about bi bi education!