Making small talk with hearing strangers

LMAO i see it too!! it sure its strange!!


its funny lol

I THINK it may have to do with the forum's 'database's engine' like it may have reached to a certain limit of some kind of string handling? or similar hmm
im not gonna get geeky because I am NOT geeky, for all i can say its often a very simple explanation, if not a one, two explanation then it will be a 'parable type explain; usually conjured up by bored fluky mathematicians...
 
What's this "strangeness" y'all speak of? Computer dummy here......
 
faire_jour said:
Wirelessly posted

TheWriteAlex said:
Stop yourself right there before questioning why we sometimes pretend we can hear/understand when we really can't, or why we don't inform each and every person who attempts to talk to us that we can't hear them and why we can't. Until you've spent years and years without hearing, you won't understand. It doesn't make us dishonest people, or insecure, or lazy, or whatever else. Using your experience going to Deaf community events or your daughter's experience is not a proper analogy. Come back when you've been deaf/hoh your enti
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just testing...
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128700320010705681.jpg


* in the picture says, "eh, wassup doc?" the real grey/white rabbit nibs the carrot. *
 
The reason threads like this confuse me is because everyone here says "being Deaf is great", "parents shouldn't be sad for their deaf children", "I would never become hearing", etc...and then complain that every single interaction is a struggle, being around 99% of the population is hard, exhausting work, and that it isn't even worth it.

So, I guess my real question is: which is it?

Is your deafness, NOT a handicap, something to be celebrated by parents of deaf children, ASL and written language is all you need in life, hearing doesn't matter

OR

Does your deafness limit your ability to interact with people every single day? You struggle to hear and understand people? If you had a lot more hearing these interactions would be easier, and you wouldn't struggle to understand people? And that parents of deaf children have a lifetime of misunderstanding, struggles, and disappointment to look forward to for their children?
 
Which is it? It doesn't have to be one or the other.

Most hearing people are very happy about being able to hear. But that doesn't mean that a crying baby or chalk on a blackboard doesn't drive them nuts. That doesn't mean that not being able to fall asleep to loud neighbors or not being able to tune out the TV isn't annoying. Hearing people complain about the loud bus passenger yapping away on their cell phone, the loud volume of TV commercials, the loudness of city traffic and so on. But does that mean hearing people want to be deaf? Does that mean that hearing is a disability?

Just because Deaf people complain about some daily annoyances doesn't automatically mean that they feel their deafness is a handicap.
 
Oh wow, you're digging yourself a huge hole now. I'm not even going to touch this. Let someone else step up to the plate and knock you out of the park.


faire_jour said:
The reason threads like this confuse me is because everyone here says "being Deaf is great", "parents shouldn't be sad for their deaf children", "I would never become hearing", etc...and then complain that every single interaction is a struggle, being around 99% of the population is hard, exhausting work, and that it isn't even worth it.

So, I guess my real question is: which is it?

Is your deafness, NOT a handicap, something to be celebrated by parents of deaf children, ASL and written language is all you need in life, hearing doesn't matter

OR

Does your deafness limit your ability to interact with people every single day? You struggle to hear and understand people? If you had a lot more hearing these interactions would be easier, and you wouldn't struggle to understand people? And that parents of deaf children have a lifetime of misunderstanding, struggles, and disappointment to look forward to for their children?
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faire_jour said:
The reason threads like this confuse me is because everyone here says "being Deaf is great", "parents shouldn't be sad for their deaf children", "I would never become hearing", etc...and then complain that every single interaction is a struggle, being around 99% of the population is hard, exhausting work, and that it isn't even worth it.

So, I guess my real question is: which is it?

Is your deafness, NOT a handicap, something to be celebrated by parents of deaf children, ASL and written language is all you need in life, hearing doesn't matter

OR

Does your deafness limit your ability to interact with people every single day? You struggle to hear and understand people? If you had a lot more hearing these interactions would be easier, and you wouldn't struggle to understand people? And that parents of deaf children have a lifetime of misunderstanding, struggles, and disappointment to look forward to for their children?
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My answer may seem off the wall, but I believe it to be fate. The challenge is to learn acceptance of it in this life, and I am getting close to the goal. :lol:
A long time ago, about 40 years ago I had a friend who was into astrology. She did my chart, and one day a famed foreign astrologer came to speak at some forum. She gave him my chart and asked his take on it. He told her that I was deaf (among other things, lol). At least, that is what she told me, and I believe her. It is fate.
 
Beowulf said:
My answer may seem off the wall, but I believe it to be fate. The challenge is to learn acceptance of it in this life, and I am getting close to the goal. :lol:
A long time ago, about 40 years ago I had a friend who was into astrology. She did my chart, and one day a famed foreign astrologer came to speak at some forum. She gave him my chart and asked his take on it. He told her that I was deaf (among other things, lol). At least, that is what she told me, and I believe her. It is fate.
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I know what you are saying, i agree it's fate. why change all of it?
 
Frisky Feline said:
I know what you are saying, i agree it's fate. why change all of it?
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Speaking as a mom of a deaf child-- since I don't have first hand experience of being deaf-- That makes sense-- I believe Adam was born the way he was supposed to be-- which is deaf-- just as some kids are born w/Down Syndrome for example- I don't think he'd be any 'better' if he could hear, infact he wouldn't be ADAM he'd be a totally different child. Do I want him to be able to communicate w/me and the people around him?? You bet your butt I do (especially since I talk alot LOL) and it might be a challange for him at times-- and he'll have obstacles, but in truth, who doesn't??? It might not be your ears, but who is perfect?? Who hasn't struggled with something in their life?? AND either accepted the situation or 'fought' their way thru it???

Like I said I can't speak from experience of being deaf-- and I don't pretend to, this is just my perception as a parent of a deaf child-- who is growing up w/hearing aids, speech and sign-- everything I can give him w/out CHANGING who he is. (BUT, if he wants to make that change in a few years I'll support him)
 
faire_jour said:
The reason threads like this confuse me is because everyone here says "being Deaf is great", "parents shouldn't be sad for their deaf children", "I would never become hearing", etc...and then complain that every single interaction is a struggle, being around 99% of the population is hard, exhausting work, and that it isn't even worth it.

So, I guess my real question is: which is it?

Is your deafness, NOT a handicap, something to be celebrated by parents of deaf children, ASL and written language is all you need in life, hearing doesn't matter

OR

Does your deafness limit your ability to interact with people every single day? You struggle to hear and understand people? If you had a lot more hearing these interactions would be easier, and you wouldn't struggle to understand people? And that parents of deaf children have a lifetime of misunderstanding, struggles, and disappointment to look forward to for their children?
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Its not one way or the other. Being hearing is not all peachy as well. I am sure you guys have your own set of struggles. Its just that we have this "hearing issue"... I don't recognize my "issue" or whatever it is.

I understand where you are coming from. People do all sorts of the oddest stuff. I see it all the times.

Its the social norms we're having an issue with in this thread. Being polite and such. Not every situation is the same.

If I just cut people off, they will think im an asshole.. compared to just nodding and smiling - So, which is the lesser of two evils?

Then there's the years of feeling that we have to make an effort for them, why not the other way around?

I don't feel this way as strongly as other people in this thread because I honestly believe I live in the perfect place for who I am. I feel like that everyone makes an effort to communicate. However, I do see how the others feel.

To be honest - I don't feel limited by my abilities. I feel others are limited. That is the most frustrating part.
 
TheWriteAlex said:
Oh wow, you're digging yourself a huge hole now. I'm not even going to touch this. Let someone else step up to the plate and knock you out of the park.
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Why? Because I ask a genuine question? Parents want to know what their children's lives will be like, and if they hear "I can't communicate with hearing people", "I get frustrated everyday when people talk to me", "i just pretend to hear and understand people", it scares them. They think that deafness will limit their child and they seek out ways to give their children more hearing, so they won't have these experiences.

I want to better understand.
 
Adamsmomma said:
Speaking as a mom of a deaf child-- since I don't have first hand experience of being deaf-- That makes sense-- I believe Adam was born the way he was supposed to be-- which is deaf-- just as some kids are born w/Down Syndrome for example- I don't think he'd be any 'better' if he could hear, infact he wouldn't be ADAM he'd be a totally different child. Do I want him to be able to communicate w/me and the people around him?? You bet your butt I do (especially since I talk alot LOL) and it might be a challange for him at times-- and he'll have obstacles, but in truth, who doesn't??? It might not be your ears, but who is perfect?? Who hasn't struggled with something in their life?? AND either accepted the situation or 'fought' their way thru it???

Like I said I can't speak from experience of being deaf-- and I don't pretend to, this is just my perception as a parent of a deaf child-- who is growing up w/hearing aids, speech and sign-- everything I can give him w/out CHANGING who he is. (BUT, if he wants to make that change in a few years I'll support him)
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(I don't know how a deaf person could change themselves, so I don't know what you are talking about at the end...but other than that)


I totally agree. I wouldn't change my daughter, but I do want to give her every possible tool or skill that will make her life easier. If she hadn't lost her hearing, and had ASL as her first language, she would be a different child. I wish I could take the hurt and pain and struggles away, but I don't wish that she was hearing.
 
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