That is so bizarre. Jeez. I guess I can sort of understand a less-extreme version: sometimes, I'm jealous of Deaf people, mainly because noise can be so cumbersome, intrusive, and obnoxious. Hearing people can't go anywhere without being bombarded with advertisements, other people's conversations, and music that I'd liken more to vomit on a canvas than a beautiful sculpture. So.. I can understand the appeal of silence occasionally, but we really should appreciate who we are for the unique gems we are, in my humble opinion.
Deaf wannabe!!!!!!!!!!!! So bad
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Anij
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besides the internet and other things that I have stumbled upon.....
some people disgust me not knowing that they are going to get caught soon.
i ran into someone who wants to be deaf is playing this game and is finally getting into more test spending thier money for nothing. its pretty sick. i hope they get help soon. once you say that you are deaf you are deaf even if you are not until you get caught yoy come out with unusual test results and such. this person even tried to get a CI and knew that would make them lose their hearing they exxagerate most of the time if they did have a lost i think it would be mild a little knowledge is good but if you keep this game up then you are stuck
I know for a fact he/she is faking and i feel horrible because they will be found out on day. Should I back away or save him or her now!!!!
if they love deafness that much why didnt they become a doctor or an TERP or something like that....I mean really???? some one explain this to me please
I'm just curious as to how you know for absolutely certain that this person isn't Hoh or doesn't have a severe auditory processing disorder?
Have they explicitly told you "I can hear just fine, but I like to pretend I'm deaf, so I fake not hearing things" ...
I have read about many perfectly sane people who are Hoh or have severe CAPD/APD who honestly feel they'd be more comfortable if they lost most/all of their hearing ... to be clear, this is different than being a "deaf wannabee" because some people who are HOH or have CAP/APD find that their hearing actaully becomes a hindrance because they're not able to understand anything but are bombarded by noise that is constant, confusing - sometimes loud, sometimes painful. For these people the idea of losing more hearing isn't "insane" - it's actaully quiet rational - an end of the auditory chaos (which is tiring, and distracting!) that gets in the way of them being able to focus on other forms of communication including ASL, speechreading, cueing etc
I've also read cases of some "deaf wannabees" (very very few of whom want to learn ASL,I guess they figure they'll just be natural perfect speech-readers or something ??) - and as Jillio mentioned, these people have a mental illness, similar to people who want to be blind, or those who want to be amputees and either "hide" their limbs or actaully intentionally create "horrific accidents" which not only amputates the limb/part thereof but also damages the amputates section preventing anyone from being able to reattach it - even against the patient's will.
These people really need to be treated with medication and therapy ... the problem is that most people effected by this mental illness don't understand that they're actaully ill
due to the type of hearing loss I have, in addition to a mild, APD, as well as other medical conditions that cause the amount of hearing I do have to fluctuate - I've been accused a LOT of being some sort of "Hoh wannabee" - by which I mean, people are absolutely certain that my hearing loss isn't as "bad" as I say it is (I'm profoundly +120db deaf on my right, mild.mod flux on the left).
Even my family , who's SEEN my audiograms, hearing aid etc , occasionally accuses me of "selective hearing" (depending on what side they stand on, how much background noise there is, how I'm physically feeling etc - I may hear almost everything - or almost nothing ... frustrating for me, frustrating for them too!
Because of my experience with being accused of somehow "faking" how much I hear - I'm always VERY VERY careful about doing them same about anyone else... I've learned the hard way that I have days where I'm "almost hearing", but just as many , if not more days when I'm "almost bi-laterally deaf"...I can only imagine what that must seem like to people looking at me "from outside" ....
Steinhauer
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Anij
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I'm not Jillio however,
Basically the core treatment is a combination of 1-to-1 therapy with a mental health professional, group therapy with people facing similar mental health issues, as well as a combination of drug therapy that includes, but is not limited to: anti-psychotics, anti-depressants, as often anti-anxiety medications.
Treatment also has to do what how high or low functioning the person is mentally (ie other than this fixation, are they otherwise "normal", able to hold a job, have socially appropriate friends, etc)
Steinhauer
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What would be wrong with taking this guy out back and screaming "Dude! You are NOT frigging deaf!!" and slap him around until he realizes it?
Just kidding of course ....
Just kidding of course ....
lovezebras
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Anij, I was thinking the same thing. It's strange that you're saying that someone you know is a "deaf wannabe"...it strikes me as odd that whoever you know would even tell you that...
Obviously if the person did tell you this then they have a problem that needs to be addressed and they are telling you for a reason
Obviously if the person did tell you this then they have a problem that needs to be addressed and they are telling you for a reason
WHATTTTTTTT!!!!! why twist my words?
I understand you faced that with your issues or whatever being called a faker or whatever from your posts and it triggered your response but I was just sharing something with everyone trying to figure out why a person would want this. It was just shocking that's all I understand people can have hearing losses that change and have CAPD and other things but it was a simple question If it bothers you that much then please dont read my posts. you act like I lack the ability to comprehend...thanks
What would be wrong with taking this guy out back and screaming "Dude! You are NOT frigging deaf!!" and slap him around until he realizes it?
Just kidding of course ....
lol we need a sense of humor with the people getting upset on this board about a simple question (why does it bother them so much? jeez I was just asking?)
I'm just curious as to how you know for absolutely certain that this person isn't Hoh or doesn't have a severe auditory processing disorder?
Have they explicitly told you "I can hear just fine, but I like to pretend I'm deaf, so I fake not hearing things" ...
I have read about many perfectly sane people who are Hoh or have severe CAPD/APD who honestly feel they'd be more comfortable if they lost most/all of their hearing ... to be clear, this is different than being a "deaf wannabee" because some people who are HOH or have CAP/APD find that their hearing actaully becomes a hindrance because they're not able to understand anything but are bombarded by noise that is constant, confusing - sometimes loud, sometimes painful. For these people the idea of losing more hearing isn't "insane" - it's actaully quiet rational - an end of the auditory chaos (which is tiring, and distracting!) that gets in the way of them being able to focus on other forms of communication including ASL, speechreading, cueing etc
I've also read cases of some "deaf wannabees" (very very few of whom want to learn ASL,I guess they figure they'll just be natural perfect speech-readers or something ??) - and as Jillio mentioned, these people have a mental illness, similar to people who want to be blind, or those who want to be amputees and either "hide" their limbs or actaully intentionally create "horrific accidents" which not only amputates the limb/part thereof but also damages the amputates section preventing anyone from being able to reattach it - even against the patient's will.
These people really need to be treated with medication and therapy ... the problem is that most people effected by this mental illness don't understand that they're actaully ill
due to the type of hearing loss I have, in addition to a mild, APD, as well as other medical conditions that cause the amount of hearing I do have to fluctuate - I've been accused a LOT of being some sort of "Hoh wannabee" - by which I mean, people are absolutely certain that my hearing loss isn't as "bad" as I say it is (I'm profoundly +120db deaf on my right, mild.mod flux on the left).
Even my family , who's SEEN my audiograms, hearing aid etc , occasionally accuses me of "selective hearing" (depending on what side they stand on, how much background noise there is, how I'm physically feeling etc - I may hear almost everything - or almost nothing ... frustrating for me, frustrating for them too!
Because of my experience with being accused of somehow "faking" how much I hear - I'm always VERY VERY careful about doing them same about anyone else... I've learned the hard way that I have days where I'm "almost hearing", but just as many , if not more days when I'm "almost bi-laterally deaf"...I can only imagine what that must seem like to people looking at me "from outside" ....
I'm sorry that you had to go through this but I wasn't talking to be mean
True people can have CAPD and fluctuating hearing losses but alot of doctors think thats fake and I agree 100% that it's not fair. Don't worry about your family you know yourself so don't let your family get you down. But I'm sorry I wasn't judging these people but people who are overly curious and have a hearing loss all of a sudden suprise me and stuff but it's okay in this case this is what they did. Only they know and you are right and yes this is a mental illness but I guess they will get help and I wont try to help them. How did your other test come out ? I don't know much about a fluctuating hearing loss but do you use hearing aids?
Anij
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I'm guessing this person you know isn't someone who you know personally, or have met in person then- instead you are referring "in general" to the people that are one Deaf Wannabee sites ?
It's actaully VERY rare for a "Wannabee" to TELL anyone outside of their "group" - ie tell anyone who isn't a "wannabee" themselves - so when I saw your post, I thought it important that if this was someone you'd met in person, or someone that you THINK (based on how the act etc) that they are actaully 100% hearing, but want to be deaf - that they ARE actaully, truthfully a "wannabee" and not just someone who's REAL hearing loss may cause people to doubt they are Hoh (it happens!). There's not a lot that anyone can say to convince "wannabees" that they have a problem ... these people are so fixated on becoming something they aren't (attention grabbers!!) that they are totally oblivious to the day to day realities of what it MEANS to go from hearing to deaf !
They're caught up in the "I'll get so much attention, and I'll get disability and won't have to work, and I'll be "special" that they totally miss that NONE of that is a "sure thing" - they'll likely lose their friends (who are tired of putting up with them, they'll likely be un-eligible for most disability funding because they DID IT TO THEM SELF< INTENTIONALLY (which voids most insurance etc) and that once they achieve their goal they'll realize that they're no more "special" than they were when they were hearing.
For me - I don't worry about what they "world thinks" - people will judge you about SOMETHING... I just shake my head at their ignorance and happily carry on with my day!
My fluctuation hearing loss (in addition to constant profound loss on the right side), due to a few things, including that it's almost certain (90%) that I have APD in addition to my hearing loss as well as having Fibromyalgia which in some people causing hearing problems (that vary in amount of loss depending on stress, illness, pre-existing hearing loss etc). I do use a HA (BTE) on my left - lid/mod flux side when I go out etc ... at home I prefer to leave it off unless there's something I "need" it for - it's a 8year old entry level digital BTE ...so it's not great for noise etc. perhaps one day I'll get another, better one that will be more useful in situations where there is background noise (mall, church, restaurants, etc) - however right now it's just not that high-up on my list of "must haves"
P.S. - Seriously, you should apologize to AliciaM!!!
All she did was agree with me that is was "out of character" for someone who's a Deaf Wannabee to tell people that they are "faking" being deaf.
If someone is a "Deaf Wannabee" they tend NOT to tell ANYONE, especially others with hearing loss (unless the person with hearing loss made themself Hoh/deaf). SOOO if this "Deaf Wannabee" is telling someone who has REAL hearing loss (like us) that they are a Deaf Wannabee - that is odd (because most Deaf Wannabees keep that secret, not telling ANYONE else other than Deaf Wannabee groups)
Basically if this person really is a Deaf Wannabee and the told you so they are likely either:
1)accusing you of "faking too" (how rude!!!)
or
2) looking for help because 'deep down' they know they are mentally ill and need help.
.... chewing AliciaM out was TOTALLY rude!!!!! because she didn't say anything mean or rude to you - she was just agreeing that the situation was strange .... maybe you misunderstood what she meant?
lovezebras
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I've never actually been called a faker so I don't know what you're talkin bout ..and I dunno why you're getting your knickers in a knot. ..and did I SAY you lack anything...you apparently are looking for attention and I don't appreciate you speaking to me that way...YOU lack the ability to comprehend what I wrote...All i said was maybe this person is reaching out to you and wants help...but whatever ...btw this is a FORUM..you wanted pples opinions..so i gave mine if you're gonna be so sensitive then either deal with the answers, don't ask them, or don't come to AD
ok im sorry but i guess i could have read your post differently but you have no reason to tell me not to come back here really....
but thats ok i guess and how am i needing attention just because i ask a question? and maybe you are right they probably do need my help
well like I guess I will help then and you have good examples and everything im sorry this board got all carried away with my question and i do know them in person and i used in general because no one wants their name on a board and it will be fine i wont bring it up again because these werent my intentions to make it seem like i was all upset my mouth just dropped because everyone was defensive when i was just trying make sure I was doing right by other people and getting advice from ALLDEAF
jillio
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There are meds that can be prescribed for secondary symptoms, but the fact of the matter is, long term therapy is necessary for this form of illness. If the person is not ready to address the issues honestly,then there is nothing that can be done for them. Unfortunate, but true. The worst thing that can be done for them, however, is to enable them with their distortions.
thank you jillio
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Not all people with CAPD have a hearing loss that is notable. My daughter has been diagnosed (by 5 different doctors, no less) that she has CAPD. She has a very, very mild case of hearing loss. She can hear the sounds of all pitches and such, her problem is that her ear was not formed correctly and it's all messed up inside. Only a little deformity on the outside that she hides with her hair. All sounds in that ear are "fuzzy". Over the years, she has learned to compensate and can deal with it, so even though she has CAPD, she still can hear very well, just not clear all the time.
are people with CAPD labeled deaf if they have no hearing loss that is interesting many people recently on Alldeaf have brought up CAPD?....do hearing aids or FM's help her? wish the best for you both
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She hasn't been labeled as deaf ever. HA's will only make the "fuzzy" sound louder, not clear it up.
She does quite well. Her speech is not good, but that due to her not hearing things right. She had 9 years of speech therapy, both in public school and in an outside clinic. They got her talking enough for SSI to stop her payments, but it still isn't real clear. If she takes her time and is thinking about what she is saying, then she gets her diction correct about 50% of the time. Mostly her diction is at about 20-25%. We can deal with it. I look at it as , this is the way G_D must have intended her to be since her therapy "didn't stick" so that's the way she is. She's a happy well adjusted 16 y/o.