Deaf view on a CI kid... its a bummer..

[R2D2]

I notice there are hardly any hearing parents posting on here anymore, even the ones who chose to sign along with using the CI. I wonder if they find that this isn't a very positive place where constructive advice is given?

If I was going to be more positive and constructive and this is how I'd go about doing it.

"Hi parent. I know you love and care about your child very much. I understand that your decision to go ahead with the CI was probably not a choice that was made easily, or without careful thought. I understand that you wish to increase choices for your child in life and for him or her to be a part of your mainly hearing family. That is great and I think that a loving parent for any deaf child is a blessing. While I have personal feelings about CIs on children, I accept that as a parent, you have made this decision on behalf of your child.

There are some things you should know about what it feels like to be deaf. Sometimes a deaf child may feel like they are the only ones like them in their mainstream educational setting and may feel lonely and isolated .......(continue about benefits of being with other deaf children like them either in an after school social setting or educational if that is desirable and possible. Also adult role models could be discussed.)

The CI has been shown to work well in most cases, but in a significant minority of cases it has not benefited the child. For this reason, I think it would be good to have a communication plan that includes this possibility. There are advantages to beginning with sign language prior to the CI for all deaf children. Some studies have shown that in young children, if sign is commenced early on, there is no disadvantage to oral language acquired after the CI and in fact, there are convenient benefits in continuing with the sign language since the child is completely deaf without the CI, such as at bedtime, at the pool and when the child is having down time. The child may later on also appreciate that you have taken the time and effort to learn sign for them and feel special and loved....."

Continue along the same vein. Maybe someone could create a positive constructive thread for parents that could be made a sticky?

I just think that by making statements with the word "lazy" "selfish" etc just turns people off. I know as a deaf person, I would switch off immediately if someone made such statements about deaf people, even if it was made clear that it didn't include me personally. I remember when growing up people used to say "black people....blah blah" and I would say, "me?" and they'd say "no, not you, you're not like them." And somehow I'd leave not feeling very convinced.

At the moment, I just look at the existing threads and shake my head. It's just negative and in practice it probably might hurt the deaf child of those parents who may be lurking because they develop the idea that the community hates them for the choice they made on behalf of their child and as such they will avoid contact with it even if they are open to using sign.

I think people need to appear to be less black and white (even if they feel that way) and more pragmatic and realistic.

 

[Liebling:-)))]

One story I was told by my friend who works with deaf children with CI or without CI about a family who want their child to hear the sound. The child was born deaf. The parents want to fix it!! So, they got their child to get CI surgery and turn it on. Somehow the child couldn't hear at all. The parents weren't happy abt it and want it to be fix then the doctors had to replace the device over and over. It happened few times and the child never hear at all!! CI isn't working for this child!! How could the parents demand to fix it over and over?? Poor child have too many surgeries!! If it's fail then move on. The parents don't accept that! They want their child to be perfect. No one is perfect.

I am not surprised!!!

It's sad that some hearing parents think CI itself can develop language and speech skill which it's not.

They are being brainwashed by doctors who claimed that CI itself can develop language and speech skill... I wish some parents open their mind and take BOTH sides, not one side.

 

[CutePommie]

Hey Fuzzy, it is time for you to let it go and go bed , sleep well

 

[Liebling:-)))]

I simply hate stupidity, people who pretend to be friendly while in reality they merely use their popular status to dirty manipulating their own opinions, I hate when people don't even bother to learn about subject yet dispute it,

I hate the people who negative the people's posts of their life experience and knowledge.

I hate the people who jump and label people dirt without ask them first and find out why they said this.

I hate the people who acussed the people for what they didn't.

I hate the people who think they know everything and belittle anyone.

The people who did to anyone are bitter and angry.

NO I am not against ASL, and

Accord your posts, I do feeling that you are against ASL and defend hearing posters and belittle deaf posters here instead of accept both sides.

yes I am DEAF,

*scratch my head* You consider yourself as a hearing impaired but you said here different. Why?

(like Sweetmind) and so on...
for example..

Please point your finger to Sweetmind. She is deaf like us.

hahaha.
isn't that what everybody keeps saying here "WE ARE NORMAL AS HEARING PEOPLE"? some deaf people refuse to be thought of as "disabled".

Do you mean that deaf people are not normal as hearing people?

Oh yes, we (deaf people) are normal and can do anything like hearing except hear. We do not consider ourselves as disabled but we accept our disablitiy is cannot hear.

yes, of course, but HOW MUCH did she had to do?
Not half as much as my HEARING parents did! Did she relocate 3 states like you, a LAZY HEARING PARENT, in order to provide the best for her son? and yet she has an audacity to publicly proclaim that "hearing parents are lazy", but the moment I turned the table on her, what did she do? she tried to pin this on ME!
and YOU, a hearing parent whom she insulted as well, are not only not protesting about such a blatant and untrue statement, you actually seem to be kissing her .. ummm, defendig her?? that is what makes me angry, not my deafness, hon.

Would you say the same thing to hearing parent IF they said the same thing as Cheri's post... ? I don't think so.

And the difference between the amount of work, time and resources the HEARING parent spends on their deaf children is enormously higher than those of the deaf parents! nowhere close to the deaf parents. I have been many times a witness how ruthlessly the deaf parents use their children as interpreters, be it in life situation or telephone conversation, and they never have any other enviroment than the deaf.

You talked positive about hearing parents and negative deaf parents... wow wow wow... when you withnessed deaf parents in real life doesn't mean that every deaf parents do like that. Some hearing and deaf parents abuse/use their children in different way.

somebody knock at the door- here. sweetie, help mommy or daddy understand what this scary man at the door is saying, the telephone rings- here honey, this is not relay and mommy doesn't have a clue.. in the store - ask the lady how much is it, would you honey?

Did you withnessed it in real life?

I was talking about how the the deaf parents are never required to undergo speech therapy in order to communicate with their hearing children.
Of course no deaf would ever go for that, because they are poor deaf victim, aren't they? why would somebody require THEM to obtain speech for her children, it's only the hearing parent who MUST do everything, immediately understand everything about something that is so foreing to him, and HAS TO acquire ASL.

I don't beleive that people (I mean blind, HOH, deaf, CI, severe handicapped or whatever) have to change anything for their children because they are hearing. I beleive that the children should learn to accept what their parents are as the same the parents accept what their children are instead of push them to be like them. I don't push my children to be like me but me is me... I sign with voice to my children since they were babies because I want them know me and my natural character... They would feel something "fake" and not normal when I change anything for them because they are hearing. Simple is ME... and my children are THEM.

CHERI INSULTED HEARING PARENTS. and sadly she is getting away with it. hush hush hush is happening very quickly.
how's that fair? why nobody is doing what is RIGHT?

I do not see that Cheri insult hearing parents here... but talk in general way. I think we should ask Jillo or any hearing posters as a hearing person, do you feel being insult by Cheri's post?

Unbeliveable.... how about a word about what my post was ALL ABOUT:
CHERI INSULTED HEARING PARENTS. and sadly she is getting away with it.
how's that fair?

The problem is YOU.

SHOW me where did you apologized. Or you can't because you DIDN'T???
If you can find the apology I missed, I will apologize to you.

Oh my dear... *sigh* that's because of her writing grammar... I cannot beleive that you pick on Cheri's English grammar and make a fuss over that....

how come nobody is applauding MY hearing parents who were suddenly raising two deaf kids in times where the only choice was deaf school with terrible level of education after which the best prospects for the deaf was to be a menial laborer??? hmmm???

How could we applause your hearing parents when we didn't know much about your hearing parents? We only know that you are angry and bitter person.

wher eare the accolades for HEARING parents who like Jillio are ready to relocate for her son?? or Cloggy who spends time, money, energy on his daughter Lotte? or Jackie? or Ricky?
and you, are you blind, Jillio or what?

money? Public Health insurance cover the cost 100% for CI surgery... All parents do not need to pay cents on CI surgery, therapy, etc. in Europe which is different as in America.

I do not see anything that Cloggy whines how work hard with his energy on his daughter. All what I see his posts is POSTIVE posts about her daughter and no once say how stress and energy he is. I would say the same with hearing posters as well... Nobody complaint how enegy they have on their children... Sure, hearing parents spend their time on their deaf children as the same as deaf parents to their hearing children as well. Sure we work hard but we do not whine about this... Why should we? We enjoy ourselves to expose our children in good path because they are our wish children. This is a simple...

I am not angry because I am deaf and HoH or anything.

Accord your posts here and other threads, unfortunlately yes. We see through you.

what makes me angry is this sheer phonines on the forum, the way how some people who are undeniably wrong pat each others back - like the way things ended up with kissing Cheri's behind, which is making me just retch.

The problem is YOU.

 

[Audiofuzzy]

OMG.
This is unbeliveable. If I ever was sorry that my parents decided not to sent me to school for the deaf, and my brother for not giving me a chance to be in the deaf culture, NOW I am ready to kiss they butts since dawn to dusk everyday, were they alive.

I have never imagined in my wildest dreams that deaf community is such a closed minded, self -serving society. All this butt kissing, patting each others backs when innocent people are being wronged. There is no getting thru to you, is there, people?

Accord your posts, I do feeling that you are against ASL and defend hearing posters and belittle deaf posters here instead of accept both sides.

Why do you relay on your feelings then, not on the FACTS? Do you realise how many times I have stated my position on CI, ASL, born deaf children, being deaf and so on? since June 2005.

Do you actually know WHO I AM? what's my hearing loss? What were my circumstances?
what do you CARE?

*scratch my head* You consider yourself as a hearing impaired but you said here different. Why?

And WTF is hearing impairment if not deafness, among other descriptions?

Hearing impairment - Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia

A hearing impairment or hearing loss is a full or partial decrease in the ability to detect or understand sounds.[1] Caused by a wide range of biological and environmental factors, loss of hearing can happen to any organism that perceives sound.

Please point your finger to Sweetmind. She is deaf like us.

What the heck is that supposed to mean???

Do you mean that deaf people are not normal as hearing people?

Jesus H. Christ. a dead horse being beaten again.

You talked positive about hearing parents and negative deaf parents... wow wow wow... when you withnessed deaf parents in real life doesn't mean that every deaf parents do like that. Some hearing and deaf parents abuse/use their children in different way.

when you witness some hearing parents in real life doesn't meant all hearing parents are like that.

No, I do not see that anyone point their finger to insult hearing parents here but share in general way what anyone including me have experience in real life with our hearing parents.

And I DON'T????
no, obviously MY experience doesn't matter. oops, I forgot that.

Did you withnessed it in real life?

No, I've seen in on TV... sheesh.
NOT ONLY I witnessed it in real life, I stood up in defence of some young hearing girl who was dragged into every stupid telephone conversation as translator. she was distraught, because she was expected to explain what people on the phone wanted, and she was unable to do so because it was too "adult" for her. when I said she is but a child, live her alone they said oh come on it won't hurt her. well sure it won't hurt her. so I guess using kids as free translators all the time is Okay, then.

I don't beleive that people (I mean blind, HOH, deaf, CI, severe handicapped or whatever) have to change anything for their children because they are hearing. I beleive that the children should learn to accept what their parents are as the same the parents accept what their children are instead of push them to be like them.

Then why hearing people are expected to change into signing ones while their natural "habitat" is hearing and speaking?

I do not see that Cheri insult hearing parents here... but talk in general way. I think we should ask Jillo or any hearing posters as a hearing person, do you feel being insult by Cheri's post?

I feel insulted, even if I am not a hearing parent, but I am insulted for MY parents. That however is closed chapter - she apologized. End of story.
Anyhoo, best not to make generalizations.

The problem is YOU.

I insulted hearing parents?

Oh my dear... *sigh* that's because of her writing grammar... I cannot beleive that you pick on Cheri's English grammar and make a fuss over that....

That's interesting, now I have to read minds and know she made a grammar mistake without anybody telling me.

How could we applause your hearing parents when we didn't know much about your hearing parents? We only know that you are angry and bitter person.

Do you WANTED to talk about my parents in the first place?
and who exactly are we discussing, my PARENTs or ME? chose one.

money? Public Health insurance cover the cost 100% for CI surgery... All parents do not need to pay cents on CI surgery, therapy, etc. in Europe which is different as in America.

So what? maybe surgery and some major appliances are covered. but I am sure there is plenty of additional aiding and non- aiding gadgets that one have to pay for. is every audiotaped book covered? is every DVD with songs, poems, or whatever covered?

I do not see anything that Cloggy whines how work hard with his energy on his daughter.

Where did I say he whines?

All what I see his posts is POSTIVE posts about her daughter and no once say how stress and energy he is.

Does that mean he does not spends any energy or never have any stress?
And this EXACTLY what I am talking about- hearing parents work hard for their deaf children, but they are HUMBLE about it and do not complain about stress.

Sure, hearing parents spend their time on their deaf children as the same as deaf parents to their hearing children as well.

Hearing parents spend WAY MORE time and effort on their deaf children. Especially those whith CI.

The problem is YOU.

yes, for saying truth out loud.

How do you feeling when you learn from a girl there?

Do you think Cloggy and other parents are not aware of that? of CI might be suddenly going kaput?

I notice there are hardly any hearing parents posting on here anymore, even the ones who chose to sign along with using the CI. I wonder if they find that this isn't a very positive place where constructive advice is given?

I certainly do NOT wonder why..

Excellent post R2d2.
But does anyone but me took notice, gives a fiddle? NO.

She only did that on purpose because of what I said about hearing parents,

I asked questions about you being a deaf mother to a hearing child.
in no way they were offensive, please show me one offensive remark about you as a parent. I didn't even knew you are a single parent, nor do I care.
You could have addressed my every single comment and question about you being a parent. why didn't you do that?

What exactly did you do that set you apart from millions of other signle, struggling moms?

I myslef was single mom for 4 years. so what? I don't think I did anything more special than my friends- single mothers.

What exactly did you do, Cheri, that helped your children to be hearing?
or were they, simply, NATURALLY hearing?

And you still didn't reply to my question: Do you understand the graph that Cloggy posted, and the "window of opportunity"?

Hey neecy dont need to jump in and support Fuzzy when he can speak it for himself. thank you..

Looks like nobody but ME is capable of speaking for self.


Fuzzy

 

[neecy]

I notice there are hardly any hearing parents posting on here anymore, even the ones who chose to sign along with using the CI. I wonder if they find that this isn't a very positive place where constructive advice is given?

If I was going to be more positive and constructive and this is how I'd go about doing it.

"Hi parent. I know you love and care about your child very much. I understand that your decision to go ahead with the CI was probably not a choice that was made easily, or without careful thought. I understand that you wish to increase choices for your child in life and for him or her to be a part of your mainly hearing family. That is great and I think that a loving parent for any deaf child is a blessing. While I have personal feelings about CIs on children, I accept that as a parent, you have made this decision on behalf of your child.

There are some things you should know about what it feels like to be deaf. Sometimes a deaf child may feel like they are the only ones like them in their mainstream educational setting and may feel lonely and isolated .......(continue about benefits of being with other deaf children like them either in an after school social setting or educational if that is desirable and possible. Also adult role models could be discussed.)

The CI has been shown to work well in most cases, but in a significant minority of cases it has not benefited the child. For this reason, I think it would be good to have a communication plan that includes this possibility. There are advantages to beginning with sign language prior to the CI for all deaf children. Some studies have shown that in young children, if sign is commenced early on, there is no disadvantage to oral language acquired after the CI and in fact, there are convenient benefits in continuing with the sign language since the child is completely deaf without the CI, such as at bedtime, at the pool and when the child is having down time. The child may later on also appreciate that you have taken the time and effort to learn sign for them and feel special and loved....."

Continue along the same vein. Maybe someone could create a positive constructive thread for parents that could be made a sticky?

I just think that by making statements with the word "lazy" "selfish" etc just turns people off. I know as a deaf person, I would switch off immediately if someone made such statements about deaf people, even if it was made clear that it didn't include me personally. I remember when growing up people used to say "black people....blah blah" and I would say, "me?" and they'd say "no, not you, you're not like them." And somehow I'd leave not feeling very convinced.

At the moment, I just look at the existing threads and shake my head. It's just negative and in practice it probably might hurt the deaf child of those parents who may be lurking because they develop the idea that the community hates them for the choice they made on behalf of their child and as such they will avoid contact with it even if they are open to using sign.

I think people need to appear to be less black and white (even if they feel that way) and more pragmatic and realistic.

I want to say I agree 100% with what you say - but even this will be picked apart by others and belittled and ignored, and it won't reach the target audience you intended. As much as we try to show the other side, the fact remains that nothing, NOTHING short of 100% ASL immersion and education in deaf schools, within the deaf community itself will please others who don't have CI's or CI implanted children themselves. I've finally realized that even trying to correct mistruths, misunderstandings, confusion and outright lies is an exercise in futility. This is why almost every other parent has left the forum or stops replying in this section. I understand the frustration they feel. Its not worth the stress, and I just give up.

 

[deafskeptic]

I agree that R2D2's post is an excellent one. If I were to meet the hearing parents and they have implanted their child, I'd tell them that their first priority is to make sure that they have a strong first language - not their ability to hear or their speech.

I have seen far too many of my classmates suffer due not not having a strong first language.

 

[Liebling:-)))]

What the heck is that supposed to mean???

Sorry, I forget to add "don't"...

it suppose be "Please don't point your finger to Sweetmind. She is deaf like us".

 

[Audiofuzzy]

it suppose be "Please don't point your finger to Sweetmind. She is deaf like us".

jesus Liebling. I was saying that despite my numeorus corrections, Sweetmind to this day calls me an audist and doesn't believe I am deaf.

Fuzzy

 

[Audiofuzzy]

I've finally realized that even trying to correct mistruths, misunderstandings, confusion and outright lies is an exercise in futility. This is why almost every other parent has left the forum or stops replying in this section. I understand the frustration they feel. Its not worth the stress, and I just give up

You are absolutely right Neecy, and I just painfully learned that.

Fuzzy

 

[Liebling:-)))]

Why do you relay on your feelings then, not on the FACTS? Do you realise how many times I have stated my position on CI, ASL, born deaf children, being deaf and so on? since June 2005.

I am neutral to both fact and feeling... I am interesting about people's feeling than fact.

What the heck is that supposed to mean???

Sorry, I forget to add "don't"...

when you witness some hearing parents in real life doesn't meant all hearing parents are like that.

Nobody says here that ALL hearing and deaf parents but SOME or MANY... Got it? I do not see "some" or "many" in your posts which I thought you mean ALL...

And I DON'T????
no, obviously MY experience doesn't matter. oops, I forgot that.

Can you please show me about your experience with your parents. I must miss it? All what I read your positive post about your parents. ?

No, I've seen in on TV... sheesh.

Oh I see, what you talk here is not FACT but misleading... You beleive in TV more than the people with life experiences. You should say in your first post that you saw it on TV... It look like that you try to mislead hearing posters about deaf's way.

NOT ONLY I witnessed it in real life, I stood up in defence of some young hearing girl who was dragged into every stupid telephone conversation as translator. she was distraught, because she was expected to explain what people on the phone wanted, and she was unable to do so because it was too "adult" for her. when I said she is but a child, live her alone they said oh come on it won't hurt her. well sure it won't hurt her. so I guess using kids as free translators all the time is Okay, then.

Really sad, some deaf parents act like that to their hearing children. I disagree to use my hearing children as my interpreters because they are my children.

I feel insulted, even if I am not a hearing parent, but I am insulted for MY parents. That however is closed chapter - she apologized. End of story.
Anyhoo, best not to make generalizations.

Nobody insult you for your parents because your parents are hearing. :roll: We talked general about our life experience what we know about our hearing parents.

I insulted hearing parents?

No, you don't insult hearing parents but deaf parents.

That's interesting, now I have to read minds and know she made a grammar mistake without anybody telling me.

Then accept her apology simply and ignore her English grammar.

Do you WANTED to talk about my parents in the first place?
and who exactly are we discussing, my PARENTs or ME? chose one.

I really don't have idea which choice I should make since you mentioned about yourself and some about your parents in your previous posts. *shrug*

So what? maybe surgery and some major appliances are covered. but I am sure there is plenty of additional aiding and non- aiding gadgets that one have to pay for. is every audiotaped book covered? is every DVD with songs, poems, or whatever covered?

Everything what CI children really needs is cover by public health insurance.

Where did I say he whines?

I didn't say that you said he whines. I only say because you post in different way about Cloggy and his daughter.

Does that mean he does not spends any energy or never have any stress?
And this EXACTLY what I am talking about- hearing parents work hard for their deaf children, but they are HUMBLE about it and do not complain about stress.

Did you know the difference between good and bad stress?

Hearing parents spend WAY MORE time and effort on their deaf children. Especially those whith CI.

It's parent's decision for want to implant their babies/toddler and want to work hard on them to be like their parents.

It's parent's decision for want to accept their child is different as them and want to learn their world...

If anyone who whines about stress and work hard on their children is bad stress...

If anyone who enjoy to work hard on their children is good stress...

This is a difference.

Do you think Cloggy and other parents are not aware of that? of CI might be suddenly going kaput?

It's Bear, I am referring to with my question, not anyone.

Accord your question:
It's parent's decision to accept risk on their babies/toddlers's life that's because they want them to hear or not.

What exactly did you do, Cheri, that helped your children to be hearing?
or were they, simply, NATURALLY hearing?

I answer those question because I am mother of 2 hearing boys. Simple answer: We parents develop our hearing children's brain. Without parent's feed to their brain, they would not speak or learn lanuage skill... Again, did you know that hearing people can't read, speak or writing... ? My repeat question about them are being ignored. Please answer on this...

And you still didn't reply to my question: Do you understand the graph that Cloggy posted, and the "window of opportunity"?

See my response on your post with graph... It's about hear itself... without parental's feed into children's brain, they would not develop language and speech skill.

 

[Angel]

I want to say I agree 100% with what you say - but even this will be picked apart by others and belittled and ignored, and it won't reach the target audience you intended. As much as we try to show the other side, the fact remains that nothing, NOTHING short of 100% ASL immersion and education in deaf schools, within the deaf community itself will please others who don't have CI's or CI implanted children themselves. I've finally realized that even trying to correct mistruths, misunderstandings, confusion and outright lies is an exercise in futility. This is why almost every other parent has left the forum or stops replying in this section. I understand the frustration they feel. Its not worth the stress, and I just give up.

I've seen the frustration coming from both sides, also I seen most deaf members here hasn't been posting in these cochlear implants threads anymore, and many of us tried to correct mistruth, misunderstanding, confusion etc, and yet none of you want to hear it....So please don't look at it from one side, but both sides...Thank you ....


And one more thing, all I've done so far was asking questions, but it seems the questions just upset some of you....

 

[Liebling:-)))]

I've seen the frustration coming from both sides, also I seen most deaf members here hasn't been posting in these cochlear implants threads anymore, and many of us tried to correct mistruth, misunderstanding, confusion etc, and yet none of you want to hear it....So please don't look at it from one side, but both sides...Thank you ....


And one more thing, all I've done so far was asking questions, but it seems the questions just upset some of you....

Exactly!!!

 

[Maria]

And, I've seen that the " deaf " people like ADers here are too strong for some hearin' parents, because deaf people stands for their ASL to continue without givin' up. Deaf ADers like me aren't that easy to back down, because of their beliefs in ASL. I believe that the ASL should remain to back up everythin'. The ASL is GOOD for the both sides.

 

[Liebling:-)))]

I notice there are hardly any hearing parents posting on here anymore, even the ones who chose to sign along with using the CI. I wonder if they find that this isn't a very positive place where constructive advice is given?

Not just hearing parents but deaf parents as well. We (deaf people) feel that hearing people get misinformation about deaf people and listen doctor's side instead of accept both sides between professional and HA and CI users.

If I was going to be more positive and constructive and this is how I'd go about doing it.

"Hi parent. I know you love and care about your child very much. I understand that your decision to go ahead with the CI was probably not a choice that was made easily, or without careful thought. I understand that you wish to increase choices for your child in life and for him or her to be a part of your mainly hearing family. That is great and I think that a loving parent for any deaf child is a blessing. While I have personal feelings about CIs on children, I accept that as a parent, you have made this decision on behalf of your child.

We have no problem to respect parent's decision on their child when we have different view as them.

I do not see anyone negative hearing posters here but we beleive that the child should accept both world because they are deaf and have hearing parents like what we deaf parents accept both world because our children are hearing. I am sorry when hearing posters can't accept the fact.

The CI has been shown to work well in most cases, but in a significant minority of cases it has not benefited the child. For this reason, I think it would be good to have a communication plan that includes this possibility. There are advantages to beginning with sign language prior to the CI for all deaf children. Some studies have shown that in young children, if sign is commenced early on, there is no disadvantage to oral language acquired after the CI and in fact, there are convenient benefits in continuing with the sign language since the child is completely deaf without the CI, such as at bedtime, at the pool and when the child is having down time. The child may later on also appreciate that you have taken the time and effort to learn sign for them and feel special and loved....."

I accept the fact that CI is better but it is not alway work on some children but HA. I really can't say that HA is better than CI but depend on child's moviation.

I just think that by making statements with the word "lazy" "selfish" etc just turns people off.

I am sorry if it turns hearing posters off but we did not point our fingers to them that's because they are hearing... They should use their common sense instead offensive or whatever... It's understandable if the finger point direct to them... I would stop them but they talk general way about their experiences and what they know... It's not about them but we know from our life experience. When I said that it's common for some hearing parents did like that which doesn't mean that we talk about hearing posters... I was like wow when hearing posters registered Deaf forum to know us better which our parents doesn't. I must say that their children are lucky to have hearing posters who like to expose deaf world.

 

[flip]

"The CI has been shown to work well in most cases, but in a significant minority of cases it has not benefited the child."

You want me to lie, oppose research and say stuff like this to parents? Ok, if you think that will help, I'll do my best

 

[Sweetmind]

Hearing aid, Cochlear Implant, and other hearing devices ARE NO GOOD for anyone exspecially for Deaf children.

CI and HA are the biggest SCAM that doesnt make you hearing at all. It doenst make you able to hear everything that wastes of my time

FOR YOUR INFO, I can hear the bird singing in a quiet environment that s all there is to it. DUHIE! YOU LIES about us not able to hear HA device.

CI children is totally deaf because they have no RESIDUAL HEARING so therefore they are (D)eaf because they are totally deaf on both ears. SO THERE! DONT LIE about us and our deafness anymore.

Hearing/Deaf oralism with a very negative audist attitude parents are too much ignorant and dont understand what s it like to be deaf itself. Scoffs!

HA and CI are the same behavioral patterns as is. DONT TELL ME I am wrong. MIND YOU!

 

[Cheri]

yes, of course, but HOW MUCH did she had to do?
Not half as much as my HEARING parents did! Did she relocate 3 states like you, a LAZY HEARING PARENT, in order to provide the best for her son? and yet she has an audacity to publicly proclaim that "hearing parents are lazy", but the moment I turned the table on her, what did she do? she tried to pin this on ME!
and YOU, a hearing parent whom she insulted as well, are not only not protesting about such a blatant and untrue statement, you actually seem to be kissing her .. ummm, defendig her?? that is what makes me angry, not my deafness, hon.

I don't need to move to different area for the education for my kids because they're hearing, they don't have needs. Jillio moved for her profoundly deaf child because he has needs. When I was speaking about hearing parents, I did not say "All", I was only speaking about those who refused to use the method of signs to communicate with their deaf child. And Jillo is not one of those parents, She've signed to her profoundly deaf son.

I have been many times a witness how ruthlessly the deaf parents use their children as interpreters, be it in life situation or telephone conversation, and they never have any other enviroment than the deaf. somebody knock at the door- here. sweetie, help mommy or daddy understand what this scary man at the door is saying, the telephone rings- here honey, this is not relay and mommy doesn't have a clue.. in the store - ask the lady how much is it, would you honey?

I'm one of those parents that don't reply on my children for assistance. I use the Ip Relay or VP relay to contact a hearing person, I use my voice to communicate with hearing people out in the society, I inform hearing people that I'm deaf and would like this person to speak slowly for me to read their lips, I can also hear the door and my dog does bark when someone is knocking the door. I do have sign language interpreters with me to any appointments only that If I need it.

CHERI INSULTED HEARING PARENTS. and sadly she is getting away with it. hush hush hush is happening very quickly.
how's that fair? why nobody is doing what is RIGHT?

Again I did not insulted those hearing parents, I spoke the truth. Wake up and smell the coffee the world isn't black and white.

Yay!! excuse me, but what it excatly is that Cheri did besides what millions and millions of other single moms did and are still doing?

So, and your point? Stop being a bitter person and have a heart for others.

what makes me angry is this sheer phonines on the forum, the way how some people who are undeniably wrong pat each others back - like the way things ended up with kissing Cheri's behind, which is making me just retch.

Nobody is giving me a pat on the back, You are just seeing my opinion in a different way than they are. You see it as an insult, while they see it as the truth. It did happened in this world and it's no lie.

 

[Cheri]

If I were to meet the hearing parents and they have implanted their child, I'd tell them that their first priority is to make sure that they have a strong first language - not their ability to hear or their speech.

Right, I’ve met some deaf people who are developmentally delayed because they were denied a language in their early years, Doesn't matter either implant children or deaf children should not denied a language in their early years, Language development is very important also need access to some kind of spoken language also for reading and writing.

 

[Cheri]

There was many numeric of times, I've brought up an important advice to those hearing parents of deaf children on this board to have access to natural sign language, I've read by those parents that they have use the natural sign language, but then stopped using it because it was no needed for it anymore because of that the child reply on speech. If they're turned off on how we are so much against cochlear implant on children, it's the same way with some of us who are turned off on how they don't want to use signs anymore because it's no longer in needed.

It's great that implant children can reply on speech, but what ever happened to compromise? Parents should keep using signs because their child language will development to a higher level. Parents should never choosing one mode of communication and rejecting others, It won't work.

There are many and many parents out there who made inappropriate decisions on doing what's right for their child, and thinks this is the best decision. But, it's not always the truth. Sometimes it's worth listening to others . I know parents have tried their best; but that doesn't mean their best always successful, sometimes it'll go downhill. That's why there are many options of communication that is offer to them. They have to try as many communication as possible to determined which is best. One mode of communication is not always better.

Those children who are implant are not going to be able to communicate on the same relaxed, free level as hearing peers no matter how hard you try. No one can predict the future, but those parents have a chance to use all communication skills with their child, the early they do it, the more successful of their child's language will development for the better.