Deaf or HoH?

In my 30-plus years of wearing hearing aids, I honestly don't think it has ever once come up that I have had to label myself as "hearing impaired," "hard-of-hearing," or "deaf."

If necessary, I'll say "I use hearing aids, I can't hear you from that distance" or "...in this noisy room," or "with the TV on so loud" or "so I need you to face me" or whatever the situation might be.

The exact label just seems irrelevant. What people really need to know is how best to communicate with you. If you can give a person the information they need, that's better than trying to figure out a label that might mean different things to different people.

And if someone EVER smacked me in the back of the head, they would be smacked back, hard, in a heart-beat! Just a reflex. The gall of that guy!
 
Hmm, this is a tricky one. While growing up, I was told by Mayo clinic that I was Hearing Impaired, and while working with DVR I was instructed to explain that I was Hearing Impaired. So for many years that's how I wound up identifying myself. But as I got older, I started having some hearies insist that I was Deaf, others said I was HoH. And it got messier when DVR started instructing me to say that I have "Hearing Loss". It felt I had to use whatever term was fashionable, leading to my confusion as to which I could use to identify myself with.

I found that when I referred to myself amongst the hearing world as HoH, most of them treated me as if I was a senior citizen. I even had a boss who said he would understand me just fine b/c he had a grandfather who wore hearing aids. But when I explained to hearies that I was Deaf, they usually got all weirded out and didn't know what to do with me. Usually simply ignoring me.

So it seemed I had to explain I was HoH (or something similar) to hearies to get along with them better. Even though, for the most part, I felt like the family dog at most gatherings of hearing people. I just didn't seem to fit in because communication was difficult for me in noisy places. Sometimes, even in quiet places I had issues. Hence most hearies choose to interact with others by choice, since I was viewed as simply too much effort.

My first experience of approaching a Deaf group didn't got over so well - I trying to explain to the first individual I met that I was mainstreamed orally with hearing aids but didn't know ASL, and was quickly informed that I was Hearie, this event was for Deaf, and was asked to leave. So am trying a different approach, learning ASL. Would you believe when I asked DVR for some help, one individuals response was 'it's not worth your effort'? It was even recommended that I be denied funding to learn ASL, since in one experts opinion it would harm my chances of getting employed. :roll:

Now I usually just tell people that I have hearing aids and to please bear with me as I may need them to clarify what they said. Then watch for their reactions.
 
cmdrwhitewolf said:
It was even recommended that I be denied funding to learn ASL, since in one experts opinion it would harm my chances of getting employed.
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So... if you knew another language, like Spanish, that would harm your chanced of getting a job? That's crazy!?!

Since when does expanding your language horizons make you less employable?
 
mbrek said:
So... if you knew another language, like Spanish, that would harm your chanced of getting a job? That's crazy!?!

Since when does expanding your language horizons make you less employable?
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when its ASL according to many audists... especially if you are planning on making it your main method of communication...
 
In my *vast* (not) experience, I've only seen it be a problem when it's their ONLY method of communication. As long as you can still read and write English, it should be a benefit. Sheesh.
 
Sometime, I just say I can't fucking hear. It saves me from all of the questions and accusations. It's other people who want to put me in a box. Not only is there life outside the box, there's leg room. :lol:
 
This question "Deaf or HoH?" comes up a lot.

I think there needs to be a third category that fits all those people who are on the edge of both the Hearing and Deaf world. There's something unique about those of us whose hearing loss is much worse than senior people losing some of their hearing (i.e. the typical HoH person) and yet are not accepted as part of the Deaf community. We're outcasts in the hearing world and outsiders to the Deaf world. And on AD I see plenty of us around.
 
Wirelessly posted

To me Hard of Hearing is a term coined by hearing people in an attempt to assimilate people who are deaf into a dominant hearing society. Although I grew up oral and mainstreamed, I have now come home and am an advocating voice-off Deaf.
 
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AJWSmith said:
This question "Deaf or HoH?" comes up a lot.

I think there needs to be a third category that fits all those people who are on the edge of both the Hearing and Deaf world. There's something unique about those of us whose hearing loss is much worse than senior people losing some of their hearing (i.e. the typical HoH person) and yet are not accepted as part of the Deaf community. We're outcasts in the hearing world and outsiders to the Deaf world. And on AD I see plenty of us around.
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I mostly agree with this, especially about not being the same as seniors who have lost some of their hearing, but have to say that I have never felt like an "outcast" in the hearing world. It's still the world I live in, 99% of the time (with the exception of the time spent on-line here). I've worn hearing aids for 30-plus years. My audiogram shows a loss way down in the 70 - 100 db range, depending on frequency. (Slight cookie bite configuration, but way, way down on the chart.)

Certainly I'd be nearly deaf without my aids, but that's why I use them, so that I can communicate with family and friends.

Lots of people on AD have talked about feeling like outcasts, so I don't dispute at all that that is the reality for some, but certainly is too strong a term for what I've experienced personally.
 
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Strangely enough, I feel less of an outcast now that I've accepted and embraced my Deaf identity. :hmm:
 
For those of you on the fence... not quite ready to claim full deaf and really not happy with being called HOH...

pick one of the following (they all pretty much mean the same thing):
Hard of Deaf
almost deaf
deaf in training
nearly deaf
not quite deaf
newbie D/deaf
deaf with training wheels
Deaf with training wheels
oral deaf
deaf with speech
mouthy deaf
deaf in search of a community
formerly HOH (but now deaf)
Singularly Deaf
Signing challenged deaf
deaf with SEE
deaf to the Deaf

ok, a couple are a bit of a stretch. Pick your favorite.
 
Cheetah said:
For those of you on the fence... not quite ready to claim full deaf and really not happy with being called HOH...

pick one of the following (they all pretty much mean the same thing):
Hard of Deaf
almost deaf
deaf in training
nearly deaf
not quite deaf
newbie D/deaf
deaf with training wheels
Deaf with training wheels
oral deaf
deaf with speech
mouthy deaf
deaf in search of a community
formerly HOH (but now deaf)
Singularly Deaf
Signing challenged deaf
deaf with SEE
deaf to the Deaf

ok, a couple are a bit of a stretch. Pick your favorite.
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Fake deaf person
 
AJWSmith said:
This question "Deaf or HoH?" comes up a lot.

I think there needs to be a third category that fits all those people who are on the edge of both the Hearing and Deaf world. There's something unique about those of us whose hearing loss is much worse than senior people losing some of their hearing (i.e. the typical HoH person) and yet are not accepted as part of the Deaf community. We're outcasts in the hearing world and outsiders to the Deaf world. And on AD I see plenty of us around.
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According to the deaf community in my town - people like you and me are called HOH - meaning oral deaf and we can hear with hearing aids.

senior people losing some of their hearing would be known as late-deafened.

The outsider thing - I am beginning to believe we're outsiders to the deaf community only if we don't attempt to integrate. I know many graduates of the oral school in my town who are now full fledged signing members of the deaf community. The only distinction made between them and those who grew up in deaf schools is just that - their backgrounds but how they treat one another is the same.
 
Cheetah said:
What are you trying to say??? That I am faking my deafness? :roll:
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I've been accused of that... not by anyone here on ad... but by people who know me... and supposedly love me... "if you are deaf... then how do you know if i walked into a room?" its frustrating... especially when they say I don't need things such as terps... because... to them... I'm not actually deaf... because they still see deafness as something that can be "cured" by my HA's (that happily... I am using less and less!!!)...
 
^^^Tell the ignorants that lipreading isn't a bowl - it's a colander. You aren't paying for school to miss part of the info!
 
ash345 said:
I've been accused of that... not by anyone here on ad... but by people who know me... and supposedly love me... "if you are deaf... then how do you know if i walked into a room?" its frustrating... especially when they say I don't need things such as terps... because... to them... I'm not actually deaf... because they still see deafness as something that can be "cured" by my HA's (that happily... I am using less and less!!!)...
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I have been accused of faking it several times in the past... I try not to get angry but I do. If you know me, it takes a lot to make me angry.
 
Five and a half years going as 100% deaf and I am still accused at least once a week that I am faking it all.
 
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