I'm sorry for this mum feeling hurted, but I guess it can happen sometimes... To hurt, and to be hurted. These are chances of growth, but when you're at the beginning of your child's deaf journey, you feel everything deeper. It still happens to me after 1 year, to be hurt when someone says "Without CI a child will have huge problems with language", or at the opposite "Without early exposure to SL a child will have huge problems with language". We lay in both those circumstances :roll: Yet I do hope my child will do well, and I know that the pain if he will talk, write or read badly will mostly be MINE, not HIS. I am the one who wants his child to be as others. He has no need for this.
That's basically what I don't understand other parents most of the time, and I have a problem to get along with them: is it so hard to admit you do it FOR YOURSELF??? I don't like the word audism, but damn, I know what I would have wanted as a hearing person: a child who is like me. It' human. It's easier, if you can live in your golden dreamy world and believe your children are just like you (at least until teenage
then you find out you were sooo wrong!!). Why do I want him to talk, and possibly listen? It's easier for me. I'm scared at the idea of a SL only child: will I ever be able to sign so well? Will I ever be able to understand him? I am the one who needs to work on his oral language NOW. He has no need for it, and no one in the world knows what his future will be. Is it so bad to admit this? We can't help being hearing just like our children can't help being deaf. The easiest way for them to communicate is SL. The easiest thing to do for us is to teach them to talk. Since we are in love with each other, we try to meet somewhere in the middle... Which, in my opinion, is not bad at all. But I have no problem in admitting the reason I make him wear his HA is for ME, for my well-being, to make me feel like I'm giving him a chance to come closer to my world while I work on myself every day to get closer to his world. He has accepted his aids, and all I have to say to him is "thanks" for that. I know he's doing it for me.
Parents have feelings too, and sometimes you just have to admit you're not able to overcome your feelings. It's ok. But I prefer to admit that this is the reason for my choice of HA or CI. Some parents told me "I do it for his future well-being, as an adult". But you know nothing about that adult. He doesn't exist for me. I have a 2yo, Deaf to the bone, and that's the reality I have to live with. And yes, I need to make him walk a little to meet me in a middle way, as he needs me to do the same. HA or CI is what we ask these children to do FOR US, in my opinion. SL is something we simply owe them.