A loving, balanced family is such where each individual is respectful of another, respect his individuality, his personal space,
is supportive, compassionate and considerate of each other.
That doesn't mean of course saying witlessly "yes" to everything,
but recognizing wrong for wrong and right for right.
These guidelines are universal.
Fuzzy
Not universal. Not even in the U.S.
Depends on your religion, culture, etc.
You definition is really and ideal, and like most ideals almost unattainable.
If you happen to have parents who represent all of these traits that is NO guarantee the children will share them.
btw you are supporting my point - if somebody had an 'horrible experience', which obviously can not be then "loving and supporting"
for these just exclude each other - then that person may later seek the drugs as a way to escape the horrific memories.
Fuzzy
You seem to think somehow someone has control over this and somehow someone can "create" this wonderful environment.
The parents have the most control so I shall assume you believe they have the power to do this.
Unfortunately you forget the power of children.
So if two parents have two sons, one gay and one straight, and are supportive of both of them all should be well and fine, right?
Except there is NO warranty, express or implied, that the straight son is going to accept either his brother being gay or his parents acceptance of it.
Now who is living in hell?
And I know a drug addict and the horrible experiences she relates concerning her father are both insightful and unsettling.
You see in her words her father is "A stupid bastard who NEVER gets upset about anything." When They owed money instead of getting upset he said, ""I'll find a way to earn a few more dollars this week." When she got an "F" he said, "No problem. You can make it up in summer school." When she got pregnant his attitude was, "Lots of girls get pregnant. What do you want to do?"
To a woman like her, who understand the TRUE importance of EVERYTHING -- And gets upset about ALL of it -- Growing up with such a father was intolerable.
When I first met her I asked how a person with such a kick back, relaxed father could have such an uptight offspring -- She launched into a tirade on the shortcomings of people who are unable, or unwilling, to understand that things are IMPORTANT and you should not be calm and relaxed about them.
No. I am not supporting your point.
I'm saying family dynamics does not work like that.
And it gets more tangled the more family you include. Aunts, uncles, grandparents, cousins...
