Age Gap Relationship

Jezie said:
Have to disagree... some do and some do not... how old do super models look? They are generally in the 13-16 age range... kids I see around me... crazy how young they are... hormones and other crap in food is caui ng kids to mature quicker and earlier... and it is just part of nature...
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Right. And i know a couple of japanse 23 year olds who look like they are 12.
Such is life.
In this age. There is no excuse to not check and verify paperwork.
 
Jezie said:
Matters not about the make up or anything... These are the body sizes and styles that society is told is attractive... Thus women strive to be and others find desierable... I dislike trying to use an absolute or near absolutes... For every pic you show me of a 13 year old that looks younger I can find one that looks older... Makes no difference...

When I was 18, I was working various jobs, paying bills, and struggling just to survive... Had been doing so for serval years by then...And yet, I was and so were everyone else in that age group still just a kid.

I am not arguing their maturity, nor of their age of concent. All I am arguing is that, a 34 year old that seeks out or is with an 18 year old is suspicious to me. Bump the science or even what I see when looking at kids today... My opinion is geared through my life experience...
If one was 28 and the other 44 I would not give a flip... It would not faze me in the least...


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Your suspicion is yours but its not based on facts.
The same can be asked. " what if the 18 year old looked like they were 25?
When i was 18 i looked years older, i was buying boozeand getting into clubs using older peoples ids,that resembled me.
Your suspicion is based like beauty in the eye of the beholder
 
Jezie said:
caz said:
Age does not define a person... That is not my point... Maybe it is a vague line that is hard to see... But it is just my opinion... Not saying it is right or wrong... Just my thought and beliefs.. Like you said, at 18 they need time and then can reevaluate... At what point? No clue... Maybe mid 20s ... Really it is hard because technically they are not that far apart... Just 18... Bearly legal...
Congrats on your up coming annversery... Not many make it to that mark... Awesome awesome!


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That point is for them to decide. No one else. Thats what being an adult is all about.
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hoichi said:
Your suspicion is yours but its not based on facts.

The same can be asked. " what if the 18 year old looked like they were 25?

When i was 18 i looked years older, i was buying boozeand getting into clubs using older peoples ids,that resembled me.

Your suspicion is based like beauty in the eye of the beholder
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My facts are my own and not for a forum debate... But yes, my suspicions are my own... I am not trying to force my opinion on anyone... I state several times that this is my view and option... What others do is their own business... I just would not allow a 34 year old who dates 18 year olds to be alone with my children.... Harsh ....yes, wrong...possibly, but I can think my thoughts and you yours... It is the beauty of being an individual... If we all thought, loved, and lived the same, life would be very dull....


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Jezie said:
My facts are my own and not for a forum debate... But yes, my suspicions are my own... I am not trying to force My opinion on anyone... I state several times that this is my view and option... What others do is their own business... I just would not allow a 34 year old who dates 18 year olds to be alone with my children.... Harsh ....yes, wrong...possibly, but I can think my thoughts and you yours... It is the beauty of being an individual... If we all thought, loved, and lived the same, life would be very dull....


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No. Thats your opinion. And as such i agree not up for debate
Facts are different then opinions. As such facts certainly are up for discussion and debate.

You will act as you act.
But children are not involved in this. 18 year olds are not children.
You can hold all the thoughts you wish..cool.
But our thoughts as best they can when forming opinions of other peoples lifes or actions be grounded in facts.
Anyway
 
hoichi said:
No. Thats your opinion. And as such i agree not up for debate

Facts are different then opinions. As such facts certainly are up for discussion and debate.



You will act as you act.

But children are not involved in this. 18 year olds are not children.

You can hold all the thoughts you wish..cool.

But our thoughts as best they can when forming opinions of other peoples lifes or actions be grounded in facts.

Anyway
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My opinions are based in facts of my life... I get what you say though... Just ...on this... I do not know if there is any research done... It is not a topic I have the stomach to research... Thus it is only my life experiences that I can pull my facts from to form my opinions... When viewing other peoples' lives I do not care what they do... Seems contradictory .... But it's not... People can do whatever they want to, I have different reactions to their actions sure... But as I said... Not my monkeys... Or should I say not my onions? Either way, how people live is not my business... but my reaction also should not be theirs....


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Jezie said:
My opinions are based in facts of my life... I get what you say though... Just ...on this... I do not know if there is any research done... It is not a topic I have the stomach to research... Thus it is only my life experiences that I can pull my facts from to form my opinions... When viewing other peoples' lives I do not care what they do... Seems contradictory .... But it's not... People can do whatever they want to, I have different reactions to their actions sure... But as I said... Not my monkeys... Or should I say not my onions? Either way, how people live is not my business... but my reaction also should not be theirs....


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Alright.
But we do form opinions in life based on facts as we see and frame them. But it adds something an opinion.
Like a classic example
A person is mugged by a black guy, the person takes a fact, the nmgging, the race, and forms n opinion not based on it. An example, avoid blacks, they will mug you.
The plm with the above fact based opinion is it ignores a fundimental truth of the situation. Only one black giy mugged you, that one black guy is not every single black guy...
So on...it can be said for any situation.
I knew a guy in his 30 had fun with an 18 year old. He was a creep. Thus all guys in their 30s who have fun with 18 year olds are creeps. Or
I knew an 18 year old slut, she had fun with a 40 year old, all 18 year olds who have fun with 40 year olds are sluts...so on
But the above betray serious issues not based on the actual facts.
 
hoichi said:
Alright.
But we do form opinions in life based on facts as we see and frame them. But it adds something an opinion.
Like a classic example
A person is mugged by a black guy, the person takes a fact, the nmgging, the race, and forms n opinion not based on it. An example, avoid blacks, they will mug you.
The plm with the above fact based opinion is it ignores a fundimental truth of the situation. Only one black giy mugged you, that one black guy is not every single black guy...
So on...it can be said for any situation.
I knew a guy in his 30 had fun with an 18 year old. He was a creep. Thus all guys in their 30s who have fun with 18 year olds are creeps. Or
I knew an 18 year old slut, she had fun with a 40 year old, all 18 year olds who have fun with 40 year olds are sluts...so on
But the above betray serious issues not based on the actual facts.
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Agreed... A single individual in a population is a faulty idea... However.... How many pedos have shown attraction to 18 year olds or younger than actual age person?


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Jezie said:
Agreed... A single individual in a population is a faulty idea... However.... How many pedos have shown attraction to 18 year olds or younger than actual age person?


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Since pedophelia is the attraction to children before the onset of puberty, it has no bearing on someone who is attracted to adults. As 18 year olds are.
Pedophelia doesnt mean or describe bieng attracted to someone younger, that is not what it is. It is spacific and defined as an attraction to children prior to the onset of puberty
 
hoichi said:
Since pedophelia is the attraction to children before the onset of puberty, it has no bearing on someone who is attracted to adults. As 18 year olds are.
Pedophelia doesnt mean or describe bieng attracted to someone younger, that is not what it is. It is spacific and defined as an attraction to children prior to the onset of puberty
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Pick and choose what terms you like... While I know you are correct on the true vocabulary child predators are generally all lumped in with them. You know my meaning and the intent of my question... Curious...What is your answer?


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Jezie said:
Pick and choose what terms you like... While I know you are correct on the true vocabulary child predators are generally all lumped in with them. You know my meaning and the intent of my question... Curious...What is your answer?


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Your the one choosing the terms. Terms hwve meaning. We cant just take a teem and peg our own meaning to it.thats fine to mudsy discussion. But the term itself has valid and true meaning. It defines something. A spacific something.
Child predators are by definition pedos.
18 year olds are not children.
What quwstion?
How many pedos are alao attracted to adults younger them?
How the hell would i know that?
Who does?
 
hoichi said:
Your the one choosing the terms. Terms hwve meaning. We cant just take a teem and peg our own meaning to it.thats fine to mudsy discussion. But the term itself has valid and true meaning. It defines something. A spacific something.

Child predators are by definition pedos.

18 year olds are not children.

What quwstion?

How many pedos are alao attracted to adults younger them?

How the hell would i know that?

Who does?
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How many child predators have shown attraction to people 18 years old or those that appear younger? Not younger than their self... Young as 18 or younger than 18...
Who does? Police, their records, and their victims.... For they would not have gotten popped and had to carry the charge of child predictor if someone did not talk or their traits were not picked up on....

Then kindly provide the terms, for I admit I do not know all the finer technical terms.


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Jezie said:
Matters not about the make up or anything... These are the body sizes and styles that society is told is attractive... Thus women strive to be and others find desierable... I dislike trying to use an absolute or near absolutes... For every pic you show me of a 13 year old that looks younger I can find one that looks older... Makes no difference...

When I was 18, I was working various jobs, paying bills, and struggling just to survive... Had been doing so for serval years by then...And yet, I was and so were everyone else in that age group still just a kid.

I am not arguing their maturity, nor of their age of concent. All I am arguing is that, a 34 year old that seeks out or is with an 18 year old is suspicious to me. Bump the science or even what I see when looking at kids today... My opinion is geared through my life experience...
If one was 28 and the other 44 I would not give a flip... It would not faze me in the least...


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That makes sense, thanks for the clear up. I think we're actually of the same opinion. I think 20s and 30s is OK but i agree 18 and 30s is kind of questionable. But it absolutely depends on the people involved, life station, and all the other circumstances. It's just too hard to say its always OK or always wrong. We're just both arguing slightly off neutral and mostly agree I think.
 
Jezie said:
How many child predators have shown attraction to people 18 years old or those that appear younger? Not younger than their self... Young as 18 or younger than 18...
Who does? Police, their records, and their victims.... For they would not have gotten popped and had to carry the charge of child predictor if someone did not talk or their traits were not picked up on....

Then kindly provide the terms, for I admit I do not know all the finer technical terms.


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18 are not children. Sobi doubt any poloce records are kept re them and who they decide to slewp with.

The terms are agreed upon terms in medical literature. Thus should be used properly.
 
Nic said:
That makes sense, thanks for the clear up. I think we're actually of the same opinion. I think 20s and 30s is OK but i agree 18 and 30s is kind of questionable. But it absolutely depends on the people involved, life station, and all the other circumstances. It's just too hard to say its always OK or always wrong. We're just both arguing slightly off neutral and mostly agree I think.
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I believe we are... I am not saying all people who like an 18 year old is wrong nor am I saying they are all pedo/child molester/sex offenders in waiting....


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I have a cousin who married a WAYYYY older woman, I mean its like a kid married a grandma.... they are happy, but it is VERY odd to see...
 
hoichi said:
18 are not children. Sobi doubt any poloce records are kept re them and who they decide to slewp with.

The terms are agreed upon terms in medical literature. Thus should be used properly.
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18 are not childern ... and of the age of concent... I have never said otherwise... Pedo... is not a medical term... pedo is... in best, a slang term that covers everyone medical, criminal, and the line flirters who sees excessively younger people, generally female, sexually attractive.
 
The Diagnostic and Statistical Manual is the primary publication used in the United States to define psychological conditions. The DSM defines Pedophilia as follows:

Etiology

A large percentage of individuals with this disorder were sexually abused as children, although the vast majority of adults who were abused do not develop pedophilia or pedophilic behaviors. There is also those who argue pedophilia results from feelings of inadequacy with same age peers, and therefore a transfer of sexual urges to children.

Symptoms

This disorder is characterized by either intense sexually arousing fantasies, urges, or behaviors involving sexual activity with a prepubescent child (typically age 13 or younger). To be considered for this diagnosis, the individual must be at least 16 years old and at least 5 years older than the child.


Just so we all have our terms straight. While one person may find it creepy or abnormal for two people aged 18 and 34 to have a relationship, it may seem perfectly normal to the two individuals involved. Perhaps is it best to actually KNOW the two individuals involved before coming to some type of judgement. Shouldn't that be the consistent view of the Deaf Community? Don't we want to be seen as individuals, rather than having judgement passed on us because of some kind of stereotype? If the 18 year old in question does not want the relationship, that becomes a different discussion. Do you know how this particular 18 year old feels? Do you know anything about this particular 34 year old?
 
MMcC said:
Perhaps is it best to actually KNOW the two individuals involved before coming to some type of judgement. Shouldn't that be the consistent view of the Deaf Community? Don't we want to be seen as individuals, rather than having judgement passed on us because of some kind of stereotype?
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Yep... so why judge others for a comment that has been vastly blown out of proportion?
Have stated it is none of my business, have also stated that what people do with their lives is their own business... at no point did I state the 34 year old was a pedo... nor anything of the sort... but I made the mistake of giving a personal view... you disagree and that is fine... we each have our own views, opinions, and life... but ..... just because we see things differently does not mean that we have to force the other to agree....
 
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