7 year old girl abducted from my sisters apartment complex!( Updated 12.5.11)

Steinhauer said:
Something happened to my sister when we were kids that I do not feel comfortable discussing here .... Because I do not have her permission. I can say this, when my father found out about it, he took care of it immediately.
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You have already broken your sister's confidentiality by saying what you did. If you aren't comfortable talking about it, and your sister is not comfortable with you posting it on an internet forum, it would have been best not to mention it at all. As it is, you have just told anyone who reads this post that your sister is a victim of childhood sexual assault. That is really not yours to reveal.
 
In regards to the comments concerning extradition, let me ask this. If a crime is committed in a certain area, is it always the "rule" that prosecution for that crime take place where the crime was committed?

What would the point be for long arm statutes?
 
Steinhauer said:
Something happened to my sister when we were kids that I do not feel comfortable discussing here .... Because I do not have her permission. I can say this, when my father found out about it, he took care of it immediately.
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I know how he felt. I talked the DA to drop the charge against me from Assault to Disturbing the Peace. :|
 
jillio said:
You have already broken your sister's confidentiality by saying what you did. If you aren't comfortable talking about it, and your sister is not comfortable with you posting it on an internet forum, it would have been best not to mention it at all. As it is, you have just told anyone who reads this post that your sister is a victim of childhood sexual assault. That is really not yours to reveal.
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First of all, no confidentiality was broken because you can make all the assumptions in the world about what I am talking about and still not know what happened. Because I do not have her permission to discuss it you simply won't know.
 
sallylou said:
quote]

True, that. So many of the victims do not have the resilience necessary to do what it takes to get healthy from something like this. I have had more than one client whose only way to deal with the abuse was to live in the throes of severe mental illness.
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There has to be an extradition treaty with the county in which the crime occurred and the country in which the defendant is present. That's not always the case. That's why you hear people talk about which countries do not have these treaties.
 
Steinhauer said:
First of all, no confidentiality was broken because you can make all the assumptions in the world about what I am talking about and still not know what happened. Because I do not have her permission to discuss it you simply won't know.
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You broke confidentiality by stating that anything happened during a discussion of childhood sexual abuse. Now everyone on this forum knows that something happened to your sister. Again, not even that is yours to tell.
 
Beowulf said:
I know how he felt. I talked the DA to drop the charge against me from:cool2: Assault to Disturbing the Peace. :|
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:lol:

My dad didn't exactly assault anyone. He did have them arrested and prosecuted. I am sure neither my father nor my sister would sue me for breach of confidentiality anyways ...:giggle: besides my sister has breached my "confidentiality" numerous times .... Especially when she and my wife are across the room giggling and pointing at me.
 
sallylou said:
There has to be an extradition treaty with the county in which the crime occurred and the country in which the defendant is present. That's not always the case. That's why you hear people talk about which countries do not have these treaties.
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Right, and it is why criminals with the means that are facing long prison terms will run to a country that will not extradite.
 
Steinhauer said:
:lol:

My dad didn't exactly assault anyone. He did have them arrested and prosecuted. I am sure neither my father nor my sister would sue me for breach of confidentiality anyways ...:giggle: besides my sister has breached my "confidentiality" numerous times .... Especially when she and my wife are across the room giggling and pointing at me.
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It isn't about a lawsuit. It is about respect. And to compare your wife and your sister giggling about you to you stating that she was a victim of a sexual assault is about the most disrespectful thing you could do. Sexual assault should never be minimized, and the victim should always have the power of decision when it comes to revealing even so much as it occurred. To take that away is simply to disempower in the same way that the sexual assault does to begin with.
 
It really is the survivor's decision whether or not to disclose private information. I don't know steinhauer or where he lives, so I don't know this person.

It doesn't help survivors when a man assaults a perpetrator. It would make me feel worse. Supportive family members should allow the survivor to deal with it in her own way.
 
Thanks, Jillio. I didn't want to discuss something that should be confidential.
 
jillio said:
It isn't about a lawsuit. It is about respect. And to compare your wife and your sister giggling about you to you stating that she was a victim of a sexual assault is about the most disrespectful thing you could do. Sexual assault should never be minimized, and the victim should always have the power of decision when it comes to revealing even so much as it occurred. To take that away is simply to disempower in the same way that the sexual assault does to begin with.
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I certainly respect my sister and my family. But, you are already making assumptions on what happened by claiming it was sexual assault. Her confidentiality is still intact and this will not turn into a guessing game.

In fact, I never said it didn't happen to me either. Should I respect my own confidentiality?
 
I'm wondering what good can come out of this little girl's death. Her death is tragic if it's meaningless. How do we make sure she didn't die in vain?
 
sallylou said:
I'm wondering what good can come out of this little girl's death. Her death is tragic if it's meaningless. How do we make sure she didn't die in vain?
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I have been thinking about your question all morning. It is tragic and meaningless. I can't think of anything "good" that can result of it. A little girl's life has been snuffed out by a monster.

The only thing I would suggest, is that she be remembered and honored.

[ame=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=U5W4RjTW3zQ]Celine Dion - Fly - YouTube[/ame]
 
Steinhauer said:
I certainly respect my sister and my family. But, you are already making assumptions on what happened by claiming it was sexual assault. Her confidentiality is still intact and this will not turn into a guessing game.

In fact, I never said it didn't happen to me either. Should I respect my own confidentiality?
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You brought up something happening to your sister and your father's response to it in light of a discussion on children being sexually asaulted. Your meaning was quite clear. You were not as subtle as you thought you were being. You assume that just not giving details is respecting confidentiality. You are incorrect. Simply stating that something happened is breaching your sister's confidentiality. No one needs to guess. You told more than you even suspected you did by the timing of your comment and your willingness to state that "something happened" happened to your sister.

You can release any information you wish about yourself. It is yours to tell. However, it is not yours to tell anything about anyone else, including dropping little lead ins like, "Something happened to my sister."

So, no, your sister's confidentiality is not still intact. And yes, it is disrespectful to her to comment, at all, on something that is not yours to tell. But, I really don't expect you to understand this. You seem to have a problem with boundaries, and somehow think that because you know someone, their experience becomes your experience, as well. Hoever, I can see that others understand this issue, and as a consequence, will think twice before disclosing anything that is not theirs to disclose.
 
sallylou said:
I'm wondering what good can come out of this little girl's death. Her death is tragic if it's meaningless. How do we make sure she didn't die in vain?
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That is a good question, sallylou. We may not know for some time what good can come from this. I think everyone has to get past the shock and the grief before we can even begin to look for meaning. I am certain that meaning will be found; just not today or tomorrow.
 
jillio said:
You brought up something happening to your sister and your father's response to it in light of a discussion on children being sexually asaulted. Your meaning was quite clear. You were not as subtle as you thought you were being. You assume that just not giving details is respecting confidentiality. You are incorrect. Simply stating that something happened is breaching your sister's confidentiality. No one needs to guess. You told more than you even suspected you did by the timing of your comment and your willingness to state that "something happened" happened to your sister.

You can release any information you wish about yourself. It is yours to tell. However, it is not yours to tell anything about anyone else, including dropping little lead ins like, "Something happened to my sister."

So, no, your sister's confidentiality is not still intact. And yes, it is disrespectful to her to comment, at all, on something that is not yours to tell. But, I really don't expeict you to understand this. You seem to have a problem with boundaries, and somehow think that because you know someone, their experience becomes your experience, as well. Hoever, I can see that others understand this issue, and as a consequence, will think twice before disclosing anything that is not theirs to disclose.
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Jillio, I have already addressed this and made it quite clear that I am respectful of my sister and my family. Your attempts to further berate me are failing. Please take it to another thread. Thankyou.
 
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