When hearie person said to you something and didn't know you're Ddeaf/Hhoh....

Deafteen90 said:
I get the never mind thing a lot from my mum and sister then they get mad at me. im deaf! not my fault, then if i say never mind or something back to them they get mad at me, and i get shouted at, oh excuse me? why cant i win grr!!
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Oh yeah, that's happened to me a lot. I don't think it's that they're mad at you, I think they're frustrated. Maybe if you told them how to make it clearer-for instance, enunciate or speak slower, there'd be less frustration on both ends. It's gonna last as long as you live, so find a way to deal with it or you'll go nuts. (like the rest of us! ;) )
 
flyingace said:
Oh yeah, that's happened to me a lot. I don't think it's that they're mad at you, I think they're frustrated. Maybe if you told them how to make it clearer-for instance, enunciate or speak slower, there'd be less frustration on both ends. It's gonna last as long as you live, so find a way to deal with it or you'll go nuts. (like the rest of us! ;) )
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The "nevermind" cuts like a knife. Cause it's like I understand you're impatient, but do you think I want to stand here and make you repeat yourself, get the damn marbles out of your mouth.

Getting shouted at is almost as bad, but more an irritation I find, but that's easier to deal with cause most people don't understand deafness so you have to give them that.
 
robro182 said:
The "nevermind" cuts like a knife. Cause it's like I understand you're impatient, but do you think I want to stand here and make you repeat yourself, get the damn marbles out of your mouth.

Getting shouted at is almost as bad, but more an irritation I find, but that's easier to deal with cause most people don't understand deafness so you have to give them that.
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To me, the "neverminds" is like I am not important enough to be included in the conversation or get the information. I hate them...since getting involved with the Deaf community more meaning less involvement with the hearing community, those "neverminds" dont happen as often.
 
robro182 said:
The "nevermind" cuts like a knife. Cause it's like I understand you're impatient, but do you think I want to stand here and make you repeat yourself, get the damn marbles out of your mouth.

Getting shouted at is almost as bad, but more an irritation I find, but that's easier to deal with cause most people don't understand deafness so you have to give them that.
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Getting shouted at is irritating. because when you ask them to repeat themselves then they get frustrated and yell it out of anger. Then I'm like Gawd!

I tell them geez! OK. You don't have to get mad! That is when I give them the "never mind"

so I guess it goes both ways.
 
Once, in high school, a friend of mine who is famous for mumbling sometimes, said something to me, and I couldn't understand her, even after she repeated it 3x. She got frustrated and yelled at me "PAY ATTENTION!" and I got angry and yelled at her "F^&% YOU! If you were deaf, you wouldn't even be able to speak! You probably wouldn't even be able to sign! (she has horrible hand-eye coordination) You wouldn't even be able to graduate elementary school and you know it! So why don't you give me a freakin break?" My friend was speechless and so were the people around us. She never bothered me about it again and we are still good friends after 13 years! We laugh about it to this day.
 
Daredevel7 said:
Once, in high school, a friend of mine who is famous for mumbling sometimes, said something to me, and I couldn't understand her, even after she repeated it 3x. She got frustrated and yelled at me "PAY ATTENTION!" and I got angry and yelled at her "F^&% YOU! If you were deaf, you wouldn't even be able to speak! You probably wouldn't even be able to sign! (she has horrible hand-eye coordination) You wouldn't even be able to graduate elementary school and you know it! So why don't you give me a freakin break?" My friend was speechless and so were the people around us. She never bothered me about it again and we are still good friends after 13 years! We laugh about it to this day.
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Yup!

Then the person will place the blame on you. by saying I wasn't yelling at you I was just repeating myself in a "louder voice"

I would be like...Yeah right! That is why you had the pissed off look while you were doing it.

Like they think we don't know the difference in repeating themselves in a louder tone from repeating themselves out of anger.
 
Yeah happened to me sometimes too, some people thought I ignored them before. So after that, I start to looking around a lot since I grew up because I don't want people think I ignore them. Sometimes I looked at some of teen kids and they gave me attitude with their wide eyes like think I stared at them but I didn't. I just make sure nobody talk or talk to me that's all..whatever. But I still keep looking around at people.

My bf don't look around. He keep facing straight, didn't even look around. Many people tried talk to him behind his back. I tapped him to look at them! That's happened many times. And my bf told people that he's deaf but he just point at his ear but didn't shake his head. People confused and said what? They don't understand what he meaning by point at his ear. I told him to add shake his head.. He said I have to respect his way. He rather just point at his ear. ugh so I had to tell them instead of let him tell them.

Also, at some stores or public, people stand looking at foods, their carts is in the middle of way. I couldn't go through but I couldn't speak and I don't want to touch them as tapping their shoulder cuz some of people wouldn't like it if strangers touch them. I always had to waitinggg till they notice me trying go through. I could tell that they puzzled why I didn't say anything like excuse me. So they moved the cart and let me go.
 
Oh yeah and when I drove then stop the red light. I was looking at my sidekick or daydreaming..then looked at mirror, saw someone got pissed off and waved at me in behind my car, then I looked at the light it's green. I was like ooh OOPS!!!!!! I start driving. I bet they did honked at me but I can't hear it. I always wonder how long I been stay while light green. I felt embarrassed.
 
DeafDoc1 said:
"Sorry".

Sometimes I find myself apologizing for being Deaf..."sorry, I'm deaf". "Sorry, I can't hear." "Sorry, I dont understand". Or worse, when I tell people I've lost my hearing, they say "Oh, Sorry" like I have a terminal disease. I hate that. I hate that I feel like I have to apologize for a fact of life, for the fact that an invisibile difference becomes such a huge barrier.

I just try to tell people that I'm fine, I just can't hear. I also try not to be rude, because I think most people are innocent. I don't think most people intend to be rude or insulting, and sometimes I think they respond out of embarassment and ignorance. I try to educate them so maybe it will be a better experience for the next deaf person they meet.
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I think it's kinda ok if deaf people telling them "I am sorry I can't hear"..I think they meant by couldn't have communicate with them or couldn't understand them cuz we don't have papers and pen with us sometimes. If deaf have paper and pen, they don't have to say sorry. But if no paper and pen then can say sorry cuz there's no any way we could communcation. so they ask wrong person. sometimes I wish I could understand what they saying.
 
Scared_Silence said:
i still remember the first time a hearie told me "nevermind." it was my dad. being just recent deaf, he was talking and i was trying to read his lips and after the third time i asked him to repeat himself, he said "nevermind" and walked away. it was actually kinda heartbreaking. ever since then i resented the word.
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Sorry about that. This is opposite of me and my dad. My dad is hearing and I am deaf, I tried to tell him something, I fingerspelling, he don't understand, then I do it really SLOW! He still don't get it. I was gave up and told him nevermind. He got pissed off and yelling at me, "NO!!! TELL ME!".. I end up had to stand up and went get the paper and pen. Or telling him to get online on computer on aim so we talking on aim through his computer to my sidekick. He always get mad if I say nevermind to him all the times.
 
robro182 said:
The "nevermind" cuts like a knife. Cause it's like I understand you're impatient, but do you think I want to stand here and make you repeat yourself, get the damn marbles out of your mouth.

Getting shouted at is almost as bad, but more an irritation I find, but that's easier to deal with cause most people don't understand deafness so you have to give them that.
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Yes, that knife doesn't get any duller the older you get. It still gets me, especially when people who know me and have had plenty of time to get used to me being deaf use that N-word. :roll:
 
damienmommy said:
Oh yeah and when I drove then stop the red light. I was looking at my sidekick or daydreaming..then looked at mirror, saw someone got pissed off and waved at me in behind my car, then I looked at the light it's green. I was like ooh OOPS!!!!!! I start driving. I bet they did honked at me but I can't hear it. I always wonder how long I been stay while light green. I felt embarrassed.
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I can beat that-a few months ago I was sitting at a stop light daydreaming and then wondered why the cross-traffic wasn't moving. Then I noticed the car in the lane next to me was trying to move over to the curb, and looked in my rearview mirror and there was an ambulance right behind me, lights flashing. It moved to the space created by the car next to me. I felt so stupid. I usually try to remember to keep an eye out for emergency vehicles. I lot count of the times when I thanked God for other people because I might have gone into an intersection just when a fire truck or police car was speeding through.
 
flyingace said:
I can beat that-a few months ago I was sitting at a stop light daydreaming and then wondered why the cross-traffic wasn't moving. Then I noticed the car in the lane next to me was trying to move over to the curb, and looked in my rearview mirror and there was an ambulance right behind me, lights flashing. It moved to the space created by the car next to me. I felt so stupid. I usually try to remember to keep an eye out for emergency vehicles. I lot count of the times when I thanked God for other people because I might have gone into an intersection just when a fire truck or police car was speeding through.
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I've had that happen to me, and have had some awful looks from ambulance drivers too.
 
oh lord Molly! I laughed hard when I read your message. I can hear lots of mumbling too and if I try to guess I usually get what they've said wrong.... sometimes it is really funny. One time a student asked me "is the test online" and I whipped around and said "did you just ask me if I have sex on time?"! Luckily they tend to think my interpretation of what they've said is hilarious. "Is there a quiz" sounds way too much like "dare a whizz"... :P

A lot of my mishearings involve swear words too! and sex words. What is with that?
 
I subbed for another prof's class last semester and explained to the class that I had a hearing loss. The lecture got underway and towards the end of the hour I asked if anyone had questions or comments. One kid looked straight at me and said "why should we say anything if you won't hear us?" His friends around him started laughing. So I said "well, I suppose that's one way of looking at it, but I can read lips - so fire away!". I tried to smile and take it in stride but as soon as the class was dismissed I went to my office and just cried my eyes out. Why are people so freakin' mean?

The next semester a student who was in that class happened to be enrolled in one of mine. After the first lecture she came up to the podium and apologized to me about that incident, saying "that kid was a jerk". The fact that someone remembered that slight from months b4 - and realized my feelings were probably hurt by it - was quite touching. I went back to my office and cried in a good way.
 
Oh Nika! I would have a very hard time not getting rude with that one - how can people confuse being blind vs deaf? I would have to tell them: "why are you shouting at my eyeballs? you may as do an interpretive dance to show me what you're saying!"... and that would be quickly followed by telling them to "go outside and play hide and go f+ck yourself".

And as for people who think blind/deaf means dumb, they can go play in traffic. I love every chance I get to make people call me "Dr. R" and then say "what? can you repeat that please"?
 
eatinganesh said:
I subbed for another prof's class last semester and explained to the class that I had a hearing loss. The lecture got underway and towards the end of the hour I asked if anyone had questions or comments. One kid looked straight at me and said "why should we say anything if you won't hear us?" His friends around him started laughing. So I said "well, I suppose that's one way of looking at it, but I can read lips - so fire away!". I tried to smile and take it in stride but as soon as the class was dismissed I went to my office and just cried my eyes out. Why are people so freakin' mean?

The next semester a student who was in that class happened to be enrolled in one of mine. After the first lecture she came up to the podium and apologized to me about that incident, saying "that kid was a jerk". The fact that someone remembered that slight from months b4 - and realized my feelings were probably hurt by it - was quite touching. I went back to my office and cried in a good way.
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So, what's a bad way of crying?
Happy New Year!
 
Hear Again said:
one of my sisters says this to me whenever i ask her to repeat herself (she is very softspoken) and it bugs the h*ll out of me. :mad:

i also get people who say they're sorry because i can't see. my response to that is, "why be sorry? i'm not, so why should you be?"

besides, blindness is something i've always known and you can't miss what you never had.
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yeah My sister is very softspoken too. Usually I'll ask her to repeat it and she'd be still soft spokened. And I wouldn't understand her at all and she'd just give up and say: "Never mind"

Typical

But When we're fighting. She uses this hurtful words: "Dumb Deaf Girl!" And I'd call her back: "Stupid Hearing kid" Honestly she KNOWS that will cut me to the core of my heart. Because I'm proud of being deaf. But at most times I don't because It makes me jealous that hearing people don't judge on hearing people. But they do on people who has special needs or people that has divisibilities. But mostly I'm always jealous of my sister whose 12 years old in the 6th grade. From the past 6 years she always brought straight A's home, And I was a average kid that got B's or C's. But I wanted to get straight A's. I felt like My sister was more of a perfect kid than I was. I still feel like that.

Sometimes I wish life were more simpler and easier for all of us.
 
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