What Ticks You Off (Most) About Hearies?

Hey, when I was at uni and I could hear that bit better I made a phone call home for a profoundly deaf girl across the hall cos she hadn't got her TTY set up yet. Her mom actually thanked me for agreeing to be her friend "what with her being like she is" - that kind of family "support" you don't need! :shock::shock:

I was thanked again when I went to visit her at home for the weekend, where her family whispered behind hands and constantly excluded her from conversations and pestered her why did she not wear her CI that they had "paid good money for" and took the mick out of her voice. I grew up with a blind parent and there is NO WAY I'd have taken advantage of that. Yeah, we were naughty like other kids, but we did things when my dad was out of the room, y'know, we never ever used the blindness to take advantage of him not being able to see what we were doing. I was shocked to see a family engage in that kind of behaviour.

We later fell out because she turned into a massive drinker, drinking until she fell over and wet herself and stuff, but her parents of course told her how she couldn't expect to make friends at uni, she wasn't capable and should come home.
 
When they use the "deaf people think hearing people are enemies" whenever deaf people defend their opinions about ASL, Deaf education, Deaf culture, and etc.

By saying that alone, YOU MAKE YOURSELF THE ENEMY!!! :roll:
 
shel90 said:
When they use the "deaf people think hearing people are enemies" whenever deaf people defend their opinions about ASL, Deaf education, Deaf culture, and etc.

By saying that alone, YOU MAKE YOURSELF THE ENEMY!!! :roll:
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Yeah, touchy. =/
 
RoseRodent said:
Hey, when I was at uni and I could hear that bit better I made a phone call home for a profoundly deaf girl across the hall cos she hadn't got her TTY set up yet. Her mom actually thanked me for agreeing to be her friend "what with her being like she is" - that kind of family "support" you don't need! :shock::shock:

I was thanked again when I went to visit her at home for the weekend, where her family whispered behind hands and constantly excluded her from conversations and pestered her why did she not wear her CI that they had "paid good money for" and took the mick out of her voice. I grew up with a blind parent and there is NO WAY I'd have taken advantage of that. Yeah, we were naughty like other kids, but we did things when my dad was out of the room, y'know, we never ever used the blindness to take advantage of him not being able to see what we were doing. I was shocked to see a family engage in that kind of behaviour.

We later fell out because she turned into a massive drinker, drinking until she fell over and wet herself and stuff, but her parents of course told her how she couldn't expect to make friends at uni, she wasn't capable and should come home.
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I see your point on that. Her parents does not understand deafness and they have no idea what deaf is like even with CI. They still want her to hear very badly and set on her using the CI to listen as expected. No wonder, she is drinking because of her parents' audist ideas. Also I noticed that her daughter was having a hard time with her parents not able to accept her deafness and she was sad. The parents' behaviors is abhor and terrible to the daughter. What a rotten parents she has. :mad:
 
When they come in this Deaf forum and then start telling the deaf to "STFU". Disgusting.
 
When a hearie suggests 'inventions' to us to 'help' us when whatever invention they have has already been invented and has been for several years.
 
I am new to this board but I'd like to throw in my 2 cents as well. I am a hearie but I have always been fascinated with Deaf culture and ASL. I have 2 kids and while they are both hearing I am teaching (or in my daughter's case, re-teaching) them ASL. It's so wonderful to be able to talk to my 18mo son! I also firmly believe that were I ever to have a deaf child that I would not opt for the CI, just like if I were to have an LP child wouldn't have the bone stretching surgery. It just seems wrong to take a defining part of them away or, worse, to make them deny it by surgically altering them.
 
codiberry said:
I am new to this board but I'd like to throw in my 2 cents as well. I am a hearie but I have always been fascinated with Deaf culture and ASL. I have 2 kids and while they are both hearing I am teaching (or in my daughter's case, re-teaching) them ASL. It's so wonderful to be able to talk to my 18mo son! I also firmly believe that were I ever to have a deaf child that I would not opt for the CI, just like if I were to have an LP child wouldn't have the bone stretching surgery. It just seems wrong to take a defining part of them away or, worse, to make them deny it by surgically altering them.
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Wrong place for this. It needs to be in Hearing AId CI section. The title tells it all. Here deaf complain about hearing.

This was just discussed earlier this week.
 
Seems I posted my latest frustration in a similarly titled thread. I'll C&P here.
My hearing does not change from day to day. If you put forth the effort to make sure I can understand you one day, then you should continue that effort in the future. I know it is an effort, it is for me also. Don't let it slide. That makes me feel unworthy of your time and energy. Makes me feel like crap.
 
How about "You seem to be understanding me OK just now" in a quiet room with a closed door with good lighting and no distractions face to face about a metre apart "Why would you not understand me in a massive lecture hall with the lights off to show a slide show over a dodgy microphone system with 300 other students rustling their papers and talking and having their cellphones ring and latecomers opening and shutting the door when the closest you can sit to me is over 5m away?" - environment is a huge deal.

And of course the perennial problem of the fluctuating loss, yes I heard you yesterday, this is today. I can sneeze and lose the rest of my hearing for 2 hours. I don't "pick and choose" when I can hear.
 
RoseRodent said:
How about "You seem to be understanding me OK just now" in a quiet room with a closed door with good lighting and no distractions face to face about a metre apart "Why would you not understand me in a massive lecture hall with the lights off to show a slide show over a dodgy microphone system with 300 other students rustling their papers and talking and having their cellphones ring and latecomers opening and shutting the door when the closest you can sit to me is over 5m away?" - environment is a huge deal.

And of course the perennial problem of the fluctuating loss, yes I heard you yesterday, this is today. I can sneeze and lose the rest of my hearing for 2 hours. I don't "pick and choose" when I can hear.
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Amen!
 
What makes me mad about hearing people is when i don't understand people, they would open their mouths and try and talk louder and slowly like a retard.
aka for example: " CAN YOUU HEARR MEE?!! IS THIS LOUDD ENOUGH FOR YOU?!" this would make me mad, i would say something whatever they did to me back at them. But apparently it doesn't help at all, they still do it.

and then another thing is this one freshman whose in my section in band with me, has learned all the bad words in ASL. and he signs those swear words to me and i didn't like it. i have told him times and times again to stop doing that but he kept on doing it. Then my good friend talked to him and told him that i didn't appreciate it and he ended up practically begging me for my forgiveness via text.

Another thing that i didn't like is when hearing talks really fast and i can't read their lips, then they would blame me for not paying attention. well i mean hello i'm deaf.
 
coolgirlspyer90 said:
What makes me mad about hearing people is when i don't understand people, they would open their mouths and try and talk louder and slowly like a retard.
aka for example: " CAN YOUU HEARR MEE?!! IS THIS LOUDD ENOUGH FOR YOU?!" this would make me mad, i would say something whatever they did to me back at them. But apparently it doesn't help at all, they still do it.

and then another thing is this one freshman whose in my section in band with me, has learned all the bad words in ASL. and he signs those swear words to me and i didn't like it. i have told him times and times again to stop doing that but he kept on doing it. Then my good friend talked to him and told him that i didn't appreciate it and he ended up practically begging me for my forgiveness via text.

Another thing that i didn't like is when hearing talks really fast and i can't read their lips, then they would blame me for not paying attention. well i mean hello i'm deaf.
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What you are experiencing is exactly what I experienced as a kid and still do sometimes as a soon to be 40 year old. As a kid, I thought once I became an adult, all those issues would stop. Well, it doesnt happen as often but it still happens.
 
shel90 said:
What you are experiencing is exactly what I experienced as a kid and still do sometimes as a soon to be 40 year old. As a kid, I thought once I became an adult, all those issues would stop. Well, it doesn't happen as often but it still happens.
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Same here but since leaving high school and coming into the adult world - I've found that these incidents happen far less frequently and those who continue to do it are only showing off their lack of maturity and understanding rather than intelligence (or the lack therof).

I've also surrounded myself with hearing people who at least make the effort to care, they don't judge and instead of making me feel retarded or incapable they help me. Like Sunday I plan to go to a Sunrise service, if it's going to be outdoors I will ask that we sit close to the speaker if at all possible. I also like how my friend's church provides a powerpoint with the sermon so I can actually keep up.
 
Wirelessly posted

Some hearing people don't understand our pagers are the way communication and get accussed of ignoring them when they talk to us. My stupid sis in law got mad at me on this way sheesh! Jerk!
 
Rose Rodent, not only does the environment matter but so does my physical state (whether I'm tired or in pain). While I can keep up a one-on-one conversation in a quiet environment, it is very tiring and I can only do it for so long. Because I can do it sometimes, hearing people accuse me of just "not listening." I am listening and that's why it's so exhausting. When I was hearing, hearing took no effort at all. Hearing people don't know how hard it is to listen when you can't hear everything (my former hearing self included).
 
sallylou said:
Hearing people don't know how hard it is to listen when you can't hear everything (my former hearing self included).
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How true! I tell people to imagine they are doing a crossword. I get bits and pieces of the puzzle, and if it's close quarters with a familiar person on a known and established topic then that's a lot like doing a junior crossword. If it's an unfamiliar person and I'm not sure what the topic of conversation is then I'm trying to do the Times crossword. Add in background noises and several people having a conversation amongst each other and I have to do several crosswords all at once against the clock, then work out which is the correct crossword to submit to a crossword judging panel. It may be that sometimes I can manage this, but when it's been a long day I can't hold several crosswords in my head any more, I don't want the clues, I want the answers.
 
RoseRodent said:
How true! I tell people to imagine they are doing a crossword. I get bits and pieces of the puzzle, and if it's close quarters with a familiar person on a known and established topic then that's a lot like doing a junior crossword. If it's an unfamiliar person and I'm not sure what the topic of conversation is then I'm trying to do the Times crossword. Add in background noises and several people having a conversation amongst each other and I have to do several crosswords all at once against the clock, then work out which is the correct crossword to submit to a crossword judging panel. It may be that sometimes I can manage this, but when it's been a long day I can't hold several crosswords in my head any more, I don't want the clues, I want the answers.
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You got my head spinning with all that. :giggle:
 
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