What does Deafhood mean to YOU?

[missywinks]

Regarding your "duh earlier. If "Deafhood" is truly an individual experience and not a cultural one, shouldn't we be proud of all people who as individuals chose a path to cope with their deafness. Afterall there are many ways to cope.

I love DeafCaroline's answer.....not because it suits me (it may or may not) but because it suits her. As Jiro said.....



I love that.....that is the way it should be

Would you be just as proud of an individual who chose talking as their path for coping with their deafness? If not wouldn't that be a cultural approach rather than an individual approach?

That itself is a JOURNEY. It is not asking you to JOIN or be a MEMBER of a group. Your experience is the journey itself.

 

[TXgolfer]

As I said, it is not about you being proud of anyone, or me being proud of anyone. It is about the individual being proud of themselves, and comfortable in their own skin.

Excellent! That is what I gathered from the previous posts.

 

[shel90]

My hearing is worst some days and when I can't wear my HA or my HA is not working I feel deaf! This happen today , my new HA did work right and could not hear the person I was talking to! I had my new HA send back to be fixed so I am not sure what going with it!!

Why not make the hearing person do all the accodomations to meet YOUR needs? Why MUST you meet their hearing needs all the time?

 

[KarissaMann05]

Well, here's one worthy tip for you guys. Don't post your rant on FB, no matter how small or big... because I ended up being heavily bit by non-AD'ers in my PMs.

I guess I can't rant about anything is related to deafness issue. FUCK THAT!

Well, I am going to take a break from the Internet.

 

[missywinks]

Well, here's one worthy tip for you guys. Don't post your rant on FB, no matter how small or big... because I ended up being heavily bit by non-AD'ers in my PMs.

I guess I can't rant about anything is related to deafness issue. FUCK THAT!

Well, I am going to take a break from the Internet.

You should be able to be yourself on Facebook. Maybe don't accept certain people to be your friends?

 

[somedeafdudefromPNW]

Well, here's one worthy tip for you guys. Don't post your rant on FB, no matter how small or big... because I ended up being heavily bit by non-AD'ers in my PMs.

I guess I can't rant about anything is related to deafness issue. FUCK THAT!

Well, I am going to take a break from the Internet.

Saw that rant on your Facebook.

I don't see why you can't go off when you want to.

 

[DeafCaroline]

What was the rant?

 

[drphil]

Deafhood-silence. Actual state.

Bilateral deaf since December 20, 2006

Implanted Sunnybrook/Toronto Advanced Bionics-Harmony activated Aug/07

 

[BecLak]

"Deafhood to me is the journey to finally loving myself for who I am instead of trying to be someone I am not and hating myself for it. It has been one of the most positive life-changing experience. "

I totally get this. HOHtopics - to answer your question from the other thread, the reason it took me so long to get around to the business of being here, learning ASL, discovering Deaf people and culture is because until about 2 years ago, I wanted to hear. That was all I ever wanted my entire life was to be able to fucking hear. So I could be like everyone else around me because I didn't know a single deaf person growing up. What was so easy for hearing people was unbelievably difficult for me at times. They could just pick up the phone and call people, their boyfriends, their doctors. I couldn't. They could hear lyrics and people talking in other rooms and what their loved ones were saying in the dark of night in the bedroom. I couldn't.

And I so resented being deaf because of that. I thought it was so unjust and I clearly remember after the first day of kindergarten at a mainstream school, praying to God to please let me wake up being able to hear. To finally let me be happy.

I wanted to be able to hear people. I wanted to understand what they were saying. I wanted to know what they were laughing about. I wanted to stop standing on the outside looking in and wishing that it wasn't so goddamn hard to be in their world.

It was a truly fundamental profound yearning to want to be able to hear that it tainted my psyche and my attitude and how I handled everything.

2 years ago, once I made the decision that now is the time that I am going to deal with all of this, now is the time that I am going to get down to the business of learning who am I as a Deaf person, am I alone in feeling what I feel, is it normal to feel so frustrated and angry sometimes? I want to learn that language that I am able to grasp 100%. Right now I only speak one language but I cant hear most of it. I want for once to be able to have a conversation with someone that is not so hard to understand.

I no longer feel that way. I no longer feel this soul-crushing desire to have what I will never be able to have and it feels wonderful. I feel liberated and now I am generally speaking, a much less grumpy person. It's been incredibly gratifying to hear all of your stories and different points of views, even when they clash till fireworks start off. It's like a light is starting to come on inside me and I'm just really grateful.

So, HOHtopics, I hope this answers your question.

Today, I walked into a store and switched for the first time. I signed in public for the first time. Not signing because I was speaking with another Deaf person but signing to a hearing person. And it felt right. For the first time, I am making them meet me halfway. For the first time, I'm not feeling apologetic but equal.[/QUOTE]


Like Shel, I too, can say this is similar to my story too (note bolded), I was not so much an angry person, I was happy generally, but frustrated and most often than not quiet and withdrawn, hiding the struggle I had everyday. Like you, I started learning sign language 2 years ago. It is so much easier and now, I can go voice-off without taking the effort to speak, nor do I have to lipread all the time. It is indeed liberating and I like the last statement "For the first time, I'm not feeling apologetic but equal".

 

[dogmom]

I am learning a lot from everyone, and I have these examples here of people born deaf, or deaf as young kids, coming up and going on this path and coming to the point where Shel, Caroline, for example - and now you feel proud and un-apologetic. This helps me cause I'm new on my journey as I started losing my hearing couple of years ago <as far as I know....back situation to that is??> and I can remember now what folks here write/say and take this into me as part of learning about who I am. Due to my learning disability and processing issues I had to learn to advocate for myself and tell people ways of working with me to accommodate ME. While this practice has functionally given me some background in relation my hearing "loss", the actual EMPOWERMENT I am learning about comes from people on this board and Deaf people I know personally.

I was talking with a friend of mine. She is in her 60's and at some point in her life lost hearing due to surgery for brain tumor. She does not sign. We had met with a bunch of other people at a restaurant which was un-expectedly very crowded and hard for us to hear in. I was signing what I could in the conversation < since I'm still learning> . She asked if I was signing for her. I said, no I'm signing for me.....

....here I am on my journey.....

 

[drphil]

As for the "journey of deafhood" it is
a state-now what to do about it=-for the rest of your life?

There isn't too many options- learn/practice ASL/BSL et al OR consider getting a Cochlear Implant-assuming one fits the criteria/and getting it paid for. Doing nothing is very quiet but what will be the reactions of those around you-for the rest of your's life?

The above from many discussions at Cdn Hearing Society/Toronto.- classes-dealing with YOUR hearing loss.

Your choice.

Implanted Sunnybrook/Toronto Advanced Bionics-Harmony activated Aug/07

 

[jillio]

As for the "journey of deafhood" it is
a state-now what to do about it=-for the rest of your life?

There isn't too many options- learn/practice ASL/BSL et al OR consider getting a Cochlear Implant-assuming one fits the criteria/and getting it paid for. Doing nothing is very quiet but what will be the reactions of those around you-for the rest of your's life?

The above from many discussions at Cdn Hearing Society/Toronto.- classes-dealing with YOUR hearing loss.

Your choice.

Implanted Sunnybrook/Toronto Advanced Bionics-Harmony activated Aug/07

If you are focused on the hearing people around you, you are focused on the wrong thing. You make decisions regarding how to deal with your deafness based on what is best for you, not them.

 

[drphil]

Jillio- I did. That is why I checked on whether I "fit the Cochlear Implant option". I did and no regrets. Remember- I am still deaf.

Implanted Sunnybrook/Toronto Advanced Bionics-Harmony activated Aug/07

 

[jillio]

Jillio- I did. That is why I checked on whether I "fit the Cochlear Implant option". I did and no regrets. Remember- I am still deaf.

Implanted Sunnybrook/Toronto Advanced Bionics-Harmony activated Aug/07

I am well aware that you are still deaf. I hold no hope for you ever becoming Deaf, however.

Why would you recommend that anyone considering a CI based their decision on those around them, then, if you did not do same?

 

[AJWSmith]

I didn't say this thread. I said OTHER thread.

and.. I'm sorry but no you don't get to tell me "Now if you don't mind..." when you disrupt the OTHER thread which is about exactly same thing as this thread.

http://www.alldeaf.com/our-world-our-culture/91087-deafhood-8.html#post1837913
http://www.alldeaf.com/our-world-our-culture/91087-deafhood-8.html#post1837945

now back to business... I've never heard of deafhood either but I've taken a genuine interest in it and read some threads to learn more about it.

"Deafhood" to me is a journey for deaf person to re-discover his/her own identity to accept deafness - culturally and individually. There are other deaf people who feel same. Together, we share a common thing - oppression and discrimination because of our deafness. Some choose to wear CI/HA and some choose not and that's fine. Some choose to talk and some chose to use ASL and that's fine. As long as we accept ourselves as deaf people... we're one big happy group. no more self-denial.

I don't believe it has anything to do with capital D, deaf militant, deaf pride, etc. I don't know what's up with that but I believe it's just some silly fascist-like deaf group quibbling around just as much as deafies who are oralist/audist, obfuscating the true meaning of deafhood.

I like this definition of Deafhood as it's inclusive. But if you read the other Deafhood thread, you'll see that I discovered that Paddy Ladd, who coined the term Deafhood, seems to disagree with this definition. According to him Deafhood is just for Deaf people, and oral deaf people are considered as hearing people (see page xviii of his book). As far as I can tell, Deafhood for Paddy Ladd is an aspirational term for Deaf people to create a way of living that's bigger and better, and breaks out of all the constraints the hearing world places on Deaf culture, including the way hearing people define "deafness".

As I said at the start, I prefer Jiro's definition. Speaking frankly, I reject Paddy Ladd's label of myself as "hearing" and hold on the label "deaf". Along with Deaf people, I experience oppression and discrimination from hearing people. I want to see deaf & Deaf people standing shoulder-to-shoulder making this a better world for us all.

 

[DeafCaroline]

"I want to see deaf & Deaf people standing shoulder-to-shoulder making this a better world for us all. "

Me too!

 

[jillio]

I like this definition of Deafhood as it's inclusive. But if you read the other Deafhood thread, you'll see that I discovered that Paddy Ladd, who coined the term Deafhood, seems to disagree with this definition. According to him Deafhood is just for Deaf people, and oral deaf people are considered as hearing people (see page xviii of his book). As far as I can tell, Deafhood for Paddy Ladd is an aspirational term for Deaf people to create a way of living that's bigger and better, and breaks out of all the constraints the hearing world places on Deaf culture, including the way hearing people define "deafness".

As I said at the start, I prefer Jiro's definition. Speaking frankly, I reject Paddy Ladd's label of myself as "hearing" and hold on the label "deaf". Along with Deaf people, I experience oppression and discrimination from hearing people. I want to see deaf & Deaf people standing shoulder-to-shoulder making this a better world for us all.

I posted a reply to you in the other thread about Paddy's definition. Paddy was developing a sociological theory, and in doing so, had to come up with an operational definition. Just because this was the definition used in theory development doesn't mean that is the way it plays out in application, however. Please remember, when Paddy came up with his concept of Deafhood, it was a completely revolutionary concept that had never been put into practice. What is on paper is generally not what you see in practice. As a sociologist, I'm certain Paddy would tell you the same thing. Theory development is, by nature, restrictive.

 

[TXgolfer]

If you are focused on the hearing people around you, you are focused on the wrong thing. You make decisions regarding how to deal with your deafness based on what is best for you, not them.

But that is his personal journey. He has a right to experience deafhood the way he chooses.

No offense but it seems that in both threads you are blurring the definitions of deafhood and deaf culture even though you did state the difference. In fact, though it is possible for you to experience deaf culture, it isn't possible for you as a hearie to experience deafhood. I mean you can observe it but that is nothing like experiencing it. How about we let everyone describe their own journey without judgement.

 

[flip]

But that is his personal journey. He has a right to experience deafhood the way he chooses.

No offense but it seems that in both threads you are blurring the definitions of deafhood and deaf culture even though you did state the difference. In fact, though it is possible for you to experience deaf culture, it isn't possible for you as a hearie to experience deafhood. I mean you can observe it but that is nothing like experiencing it. How about we let everyone describe their own journey without judgement.

I've not got hold of Ladd's book yet, but is it deafhood if I refuse to gang up with other deaf people? Like, abandoning the deaf culture, ASL and the view of myself as something different than hearing people, and instead just one of 5 billion individuals, that happens to have a hearing loss. Is that still deafhood? Is the only qualifier to be part of the deafhood a severe hearing loss?

 

[TXgolfer]

I've not got hold of Ladd's book yet, but is it deafhood if I refuse to gang up with other deaf people? Like, abandoning the deaf culture, ASL and the view of myself as something different than hearing people, and instead just one of 5 billion individuals, that happens to have a hearing loss. Is that still deafhood? Is the only qualifier to be part of the deafhood a severe hearing loss?

I haven't picked up the book either. I am using the definition given by DeafCaroline, missywinks and Jiro. I also liked what deafy had to say. And Daredevel for that matter. Even Jillio expessed in response to me that deafhood was about the individual and deafculture about the group (although rudely of course).