What communications do you use while socializing with a group of hearing people?

Grummer said:
no, its political, and you should know that.
this is BS about 'chips on shoulders', and experiencing frustration like this, comes from the ignorance in society which we all know too well about it. if you dont like my opinion, take a hike. go join the CI/hearies freaks group for all i care. "nature of well established?" hic LOL!!, you are Naive , and yes recycled ideas are bad because it recycles poor social tolerance, and even condoning hearing soceity's ignorance. Get real, tolerance on OUR part isnt something we SHOULD put up with, we ought to fight more for real understanding of Deaf Culture, we dont need to 'understand hearing culture" according hearing people self-blinded views....hearing culture can be understood in newer ways...get motivated to learn people!
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It's obvious you feel the need to crusade and make a lot of noise. That's fine, more power to ya! However, I suggest joining a fight club, or maybe finding some protests somewhere you can join. It's a LOT more effective than overreacting on a message board on the internet. You'll probably feel better after you've let off some steam that way. Cheers! :cheers:

Edited to add: Diplomacy is always a more effective tool for change and education than bitterness.
 
Lily7 said:
It's obvious you feel the need to crusade and make a lot of noise. That's fine, more power to ya! However, I suggest joining a fight club, or maybe finding some protests somewhere you can join. It's a LOT more effective than overreacting on a message board on the internet. You'll probably feel better after you've let off some steam that way. Cheers! :cheers:

Edited to add: Diplomacy is always a more effective tool for change and education than bitterness.
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Dont patronise me
i suggest you go find an ALL-HOH.com and stay there.
again, i pity you, Its Obvious that you are sooo Naive, its scary that you dont know what damages you actually brings to Deaf people by parading this 'overcoming' mentality which relates closely to audism.
 
Lily7 said:
It's obvious you feel the need to crusade and make a lot of noise. That's fine, more power to ya! However, I suggest joining a fight club, or maybe finding some protests somewhere you can join. It's a LOT more effective than overreacting on a message board on the internet. You'll probably feel better after you've let off some steam that way. Cheers! :cheers:

Edited to add: Diplomacy is always a more effective tool for change and education than bitterness.
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do you mind, not to refrain from reading into too much, where in the heavens do you find evidence of 'bitterness'. You do play sick mind games, so shoo shoo go away please your audist attitude is worse than flies in the face
 
Grummer said:
Dont patronise me
i suggest you go find an ALL-HOH.com and stay there.
again, i pity you, Its Obvious that you are sooo Naive, its scary that you dont know what damages you actually brings to Deaf people by parading this 'overcoming' mentality which relates closely to audism.
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Grummer said:
do you mind, not to refrain from reading into too much, where in the heavens do you find evidence of 'bitterness'. You do play sick mind games, so shoo shoo go away please your audist attitude is worse than flies in the face
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:giggle:

To OP and others, I am glad to answer any questions anyone has, in a patient, kind and diplomatic matter. As are many others on AD. So to the curious, don't let grumpy people scare ya off. :D
 
My kids use their lap tops as they can type faster than write, i am totally lost in a group conversation. Cant hear a word. Husband brings a white board and marker to write things down for me. Sometimes others will use the board also. Looking forward to using ASL. Long way to go on that, but i started:)
 
when i'm with friends, I lipread. It's exhausting, it makes my eyes tired and sometimes its hard for me to lipread because my eyes strain alot which makes my vision blurry sometimes. If i'm with an individual person i'll lipread, even if its in a quiet room. But if the hearing person knows little sign i'll talk to them. But mostly I don't talk as much when i'm with friends, i'm usually quiet, because half the time they're talking too fast and i can't really follow what they're saying.. When it comes to family, I sometimes rely on my mom because she's the one that really knows sign than my dad. My dad knows little sign but not very fluent like my mom and I. my sister knows nothing. I try to lipread my sister when the ears goes off but i can't lipread her because of her braces, weird i know. But she mostly writes something down on a piece of paper or on my phone. my mom's parents; her dad knows little sign, my grandma does not. My dad's family they don't try as well to really come halfway with me.
 
Grummer said:
i really cringe at new threads with this sort 'how do you cope with deafness' xxxx...you lazy newcomers/hearies use the search and find out yourselves. also it realy annoying that 'we' have to 'explain ourselves' like its we 'own' these so called communicatin issues....really xxxxx...come on folks get a brain, tell the other to sod off, we already know whats it like, and we ought to think about how to make it better rather than saying it as a 'fact' like really its not 'facts' it is more a social problem, which Means IT INVOLVES HEARING PEOPLES IGNORANCES!!!
this is to say, 'coping mechanisms or 'how do we handle groups' is a cop-out , cut the xxxx, get real its not what we wanting right? we want people to LEARN, not US to learn how to deal with it, we already know it doesnt work 'on our own'...grrrrrr
sorry folks but i had to say this, it is NOT on......

it is time to start thinking about all this differently.....
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You are so right Grummer, (minus a few words :P), I couldn't have posted it better.
 
Basically, I lead the conversation so I know what is being talked about. I didn't even know I was doing it until a good friend pointed it out to me. This can be annoying to hearing people, but I'm lucky because my friends put up with it.
 
kokonut said:
she would talk into my ear and I do the same because even for a hearing person it's loud, too.
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I can relate to this. When I used to go to dance clubs the slow songs were awesome because you can only talk into each others ears over the music(I was in the zone!). Sadly, I now need to look at people so that doesn't work out as well, but still like the slow dances.
 
Mostly lipreading cos don't have much of choice cos family won't do any other way except lipreading.

This year (xmas 2011) my uncle (not related to me) got new itouch with front camera. He been using auto to text app, he speak and it change to text, I read and I speak back to him normally. Thankfully he really like doing that cos it very hard to lipread him. First time ever got mini proper convo after 24 years!
 
i love it when a hearing person in a very noisy room bends down close to my deaf ear and shouts out what they are saying. The first time this happens, I say LOUDER! and so they do it again... Then I smile and remind them that I am in fact very deaf and they could get a bull horn and I still would not understand. Funny thing is, I can lip read well enough to do better in a music blasting room than the hearing people. All they need to do is talk to me in a normal way and they are stunned I can understand them. I've even had a few say they thought I had super hearing that I could understand them. Na, just good eyes!!!
 
Cheetah said:
i love it when a hearing person in a very noisy room bends down close to my deaf ear and shouts out what they are saying. The first time this happens, I say LOUDER! and so they do it again... Then I smile and remind them that I am in fact very deaf and they could get a bull horn and I still would not understand. Funny thing is, I can lip read well enough to do better in a music blasting room than the hearing people. All they need to do is talk to me in a normal way and they are stunned I can understand them. I've even had a few say they thought I had super hearing that I could understand them. Na, just good eyes!!!
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I should try that tactic the next time someone does that. :lol:
 
My daughter has said that she refuses to go with us to MIL's family reunions anymore. She went this last May and overheard quite a few people there who were whispering and talking that they shouldn't be talking to me since I was deaf and not able to communicate properly. Personally, I sat at a table with MIL's cousins and had a ball. Daughter, after hearing the third or fourth person saying that, just stomped her feet and yelled, "people get a grip, she may be deaf, but she can read lips, she can talk, she is a live human person and she's my mom. Just shut up about her!" I was so proud of her that I had no time to feel humiliated. I wouldn't even go, except that I have to do the driving. It's about a 2 hour drive and hubby can never find the place.
 
KristinaB said:
My daughter has said that she refuses to go with us to MIL's family reunions anymore. She went this last May and overheard quite a few people there who were whispering and talking that they shouldn't be talking to me since I was deaf and not able to communicate properly. Personally, I sat at a table with MIL's cousins and had a ball. Daughter, after hearing the third or fourth person saying that, just stomped her feet and yelled, "people get a grip, she may be deaf, but she can read lips, she can talk, she is a live human person and she's my mom. Just shut up about her!" I was so proud of her that I had no time to feel humiliated. I wouldn't even go, except that I have to do the driving. It's about a 2 hour drive and hubby can never find the place.
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Awww...give a BIG BIG hug to your daughter!!!!!
 
KristinaB said:
My daughter has said that she refuses to go with us to MIL's family reunions anymore. She went this last May and overheard quite a few people there who were whispering and talking that they shouldn't be talking to me since I was deaf and not able to communicate properly. Personally, I sat at a table with MIL's cousins and had a ball. Daughter, after hearing the third or fourth person saying that, just stomped her feet and yelled, "people get a grip, she may be deaf, but she can read lips, she can talk, she is a live human person and she's my mom. Just shut up about her!" I was so proud of her that I had no time to feel humiliated. I wouldn't even go, except that I have to do the driving. It's about a 2 hour drive and hubby can never find the place.
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Woohoo!! Way to stand up for what's right!!! :D
 
lipreading, face to face/one on one conversation, looking straight into the eyes and close enough. when it is a large group i just sit and watch everyone and try to catch something but its exhausting and frustrating not being able to catch everything =( but i always try to engage in the gathering.
 
KristinaB said:
My daughter has said that she refuses to go with us to MIL's family reunions anymore. She went this last May and overheard quite a few people there who were whispering and talking that they shouldn't be talking to me since I was deaf and not able to communicate properly. Personally, I sat at a table with MIL's cousins and had a ball. Daughter, after hearing the third or fourth person saying that, just stomped her feet and yelled, "people get a grip, she may be deaf, but she can read lips, she can talk, she is a live human person and she's my mom. Just shut up about her!" I was so proud of her that I had no time to feel humiliated. I wouldn't even go, except that I have to do the driving. It's about a 2 hour drive and hubby can never find the place.
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thats fantastic wish my brother /sisters is more supportive but they wont cuz they dont want make a fuss. so now i dont like my family that much. Last Christmas (a week a half ago) all i got from a 'one big gift per person plan on a draw from a jar, i got 3 fucking T-shirts and guess where from? Australia cuz clothes are cheap there, Id Never ever gift to my sister (the one did that) again, also they are quite wealthy. it really shows what they think hmmmph doesnt it?

anyway, back to this post im quoting, WAY TO GO!! Id' say!! that rocks!
glad even it wasnt for me, at LEAST a Deaf person got stuck up for, somewhere in the world, triumph over hearing asshole actually exists ! this made my day just reading this.
Cheers
 
I use a CI, so generally not a problem. Before, no I wasn't literate in ASL, but I encouraged someone to spell. They got it down quickly and spelled things out in an abbreviated way, but it definitely beats isolation.
 
Grummer said:
no, its political, and you should know that.
this is BS about 'chips on shoulders', and experiencing frustration like this, comes from the ignorance in society which we all know too well about it. if you dont like my opinion, take a hike. go join the CI/hearies freaks group for all i care. "nature of well established?" hic LOL!!, you are Naive , and yes recycled ideas are bad because it recycles poor social tolerance, and even condoning hearing soceity's ignorance. Get real, tolerance on OUR part isnt something we SHOULD put up with, we ought to fight more for real understanding of Deaf Culture, we dont need to 'understand hearing culture" according hearing people self-blinded views....hearing culture can be understood in newer ways...get motivated to learn people!
Click to expand...

I know you've got a bug up your ass about some kind of arrogance you think I have, but dude, it seems to me that you and I have more in common than not. Clearly, we both want life to be better for deaf people. We are both very vocal about it, albeit from different perspectives.

What if, instead of butting heads with everyone you meet, you stop for a minute and listen to what they have to say? The more of us who bond and band together, the more we can accomplish to make a better place for deaf people in the world. :cheers:
 
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