What are you thinking about? Part VI

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Why do people like to have the coffin open at a wake? My daughhter's friend looked really awful the way he was madeup with a ton of makeup on his face and the way his hair was combed. He looked liked an old man and was only 38 yo. I can't get that image out of my head. I am still thinking of it and how sad this is. :(
 
whatdidyousay! said:
Why do people like to have the coffin open at a wake? My daughhter's friend looked really awful the way he was madeup with a ton of makeup on his face and the way his hair was combed. He looked liked an old man and was only 38 yo. I can't get that image out of my head. I am still thinking of it and how sad this is. :(
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Well, at times I feel the same as you do...but it's been on-going for years and years....guessing some people don't realize then can request a "closed coffin"...but it's up to the family to decide that....

My mother also had an open coffin...and heavy makeup (due to gun shot wounds)....It was not for me to say anything, as I was a minor....so, yes...it's been ongoing for many, many years....I'll never forget her face tho'...or the wounds...the makeup was so "cakey"....and heavy.

Hoping somehow, sooner or later...you will be able to overcome this, WDYS....
 
rockin'robin said:
Yes...he's my last one...others are now 21and 18....the time flies...seems like yesterday he was only "6"...and a terror! :giggle:...but he's managed to become a mature, fine young man...and off for college next year....guessing the tears are not gonna stop anytime soon....:wave:
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You know you've been a member of this forum for a long time when you see that posters have kids growing up, off to college, etc., and they were still "young" when we first joined!
 
Since my husband was going to be cremated after the funeral Mass, I didn't have him embalmed. They were able to keep him "on ice" until the viewing (almost a week later). I left it to my girls to decide if they wanted an open or closed casket. We decided on open just for family before the viewing started. Then it was closed before anyone else was allowed in the room.
My dad's casket was open, but my mom wanted a closed casket for herself. It doesn't really bother me either way.
As far as I'm concerned, unless the deceased made funeral requests before they died, the funeral is for the survivors/family. I've told my girls they can do what they want for my funeral, as long as it is respectful.
 
AlleyCat said:
You know you've been a member of this forum for a long time when you see that posters have kids growing up, off to college, etc., and they were still "young" when we first joined!
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True that....and like to think that I was still "young" when I joined!...:giggle:...believe I've been here since 2006...but didn't start posting until 2007 (?)...for some odd reason....but many "newbies" do the same....AD is the best, and feel "so comfortable" here....and hope to keep many more "peckings on my keyboard going"....:wave:
 
rockin'robin said:
Yes...he's my last one...others are now 21and 18....the time flies...seems like yesterday he was only "6"...and a terror! :giggle:...but he's managed to become a mature, fine young man...and off for college next year....guessing the tears are not gonna stop anytime soon....:wave:
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aww I can understand how you feel. I keep saying to my son, " you are my last baby" He hates it when i call him, "baby." i do call my girl, "baby too" but technologically, he's the last baby.

so he will be 17 when he is off to college. oh my... :tears:
 
Frisky Feline said:
aww I can understand how you feel. I keep saying to my son, " you are my last baby" He hates it when i call him, "baby." i do call my girl, "baby too" but technologically, he's the last baby.

so he will be 17 when he is off to college. oh my... :tears:
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you mean technically :giggle:
 
rockin'robin said:
Well, at times I feel the same as you do...but it's been on-going for years and years....guessing some people don't realize then can request a "closed coffin"...but it's up to the family to decide that....

My mother also had an open coffin...and heavy makeup (due to gun shot wounds)....It was not for me to say anything, as I was a minor....so, yes...it's been ongoing for many, many years....I'll never forget her face tho'...or the wounds...the makeup was so "cakey"....and heavy.

Hoping somehow, sooner or later...you will be able to overcome this, WDYS....
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wait what???? your mother was shot??? :shock:
 
Wondering where I got the energy to walk 3 13-min laps at the mall today. Must be from those robin eggs. :p
 
rockin'robin said:
Well, at times I feel the same as you do...but it's been on-going for years and years....guessing some people don't realize then can request a "closed coffin"...but it's up to the family to decide that....

My mother also had an open coffin...and heavy makeup (due to gun shot wounds)....It was not for me to say anything, as I was a minor....so, yes...it's been ongoing for many, many years....I'll never forget her face tho'...or the wounds...the makeup was so "cakey"....and heavy.

Hoping somehow, sooner or later...you will be able to overcome this, WDYS....
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How horrible your mother dies from gun shots. We had a closes coffin for both our parents . I want to be cremated , I do not want to be buried and take up room on the earth.
 
That it is very cool my kindergarten granddaughter can now read and write well enough to text me!
 
For some reason, my father-in-law had an open casket funeral and MIL had not requested it. My husband still cannot get the image of his father in that casket. We did not know how much he wasted away with his cancer. In 2 years he lost 100 pounds and was skin and bones when he died.

MIL is requesting closed only and has begged me to make sure it's closed only. Hubby and I will both be cremated. My mother is also to be cremated. My father was cremated and scattered in the ocean. That's what mom wants now.
 
RR that is horrible and I am really, really sorry you have to live with those memories.

When my son died we thought it would be too much with a tiny little casket. We went with cremation which has it's bad images/memories too.
 
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