Thinking of my future and it scares me.

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MelissaWatt

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Does anyone ever think about their future.. when you can't hear and have become elderly to the point you are in the hospital or in a nursing home facility.
I had an eye opener this past few weeks seeing my 84 yr old grandmother who was in the hospital and recently transferred to a nursing home. I saw the treatment she recieved and I honestly became scared about how it would be for me. Having someone help me put my aid in my ears should I lose my ability to do so or change my battery. I actually am scared of what my life will be after seeing the carelessness in my grandmothers care. My hubby thinks I am over thinking this now. I told him, what if you go before me or you lose your ability to help me. The kids may not care or we need to be cared for by someone. This depresses me so much.
:(
 
MelissaWatt said:
Does anyone ever think about their future.. when you can't hear and have become elderly to the point you are in the hospital or in a nursing home facility.
I had an eye opener this past few weeks seeing my 84 yr old grandmother who was in the hospital and recently transferred to a nursing home. I saw the treatment she recieved and I honestly became scared about how it would be for me. Having someone help me put my aid in my ears should I lose my ability to do so or change my battery. I actually am scared of what my life will be after seeing the carelessness in my grandmothers care. My hubby thinks I am over thinking this now. I told him, what if you go before me or you lose your ability to help me. The kids may not care or we need to be cared for by someone. This depresses me so much.
:(
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Please see a psychiatrist.
This is unhealthy thinking for you, and it is going to have an impact on your family also.
 
I can understand how you're feeling , I was a health aide and I saw what happen when a person is no longer able to care for their self . I am not sure how old you're but you can have something written saying just want you want to happen if are no longer able to speak for yourself . I been thinking of my 93 mother yo being bedbound for the last 6 years of her life and that is NOT living to me. I would rather be dead. But you should not keep this from enjoying your life now . If would made you feel better you could talk a lawyer and see you should be doing to get ready for your old age. I really don't person need to see someone right away , but if worry about this for a month and is start to affect their sleep ,job
and married then they may need help. OK I did not see the OP other thread about her HA and I see where you're coming now Bott. Yes she should seek come help .
 
MelissaWatt said:
Does anyone ever think about their future.. when you can't hear and have become elderly to the point you are in the hospital or in a nursing home facility.
I had an eye opener this past few weeks seeing my 84 yr old grandmother who was in the hospital and recently transferred to a nursing home. I saw the treatment she recieved and I honestly became scared about how it would be for me. Having someone help me put my aid in my ears should I lose my ability to do so or change my battery. I actually am scared of what my life will be after seeing the carelessness in my grandmothers care. My hubby thinks I am over thinking this now. I told him, what if you go before me or you lose your ability to help me. The kids may not care or we need to be cared for by someone. This depresses me so much.
:(
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your hubby right you over thinking,put me in glum mood
 
I am having to wait til the end of October to get help. I know I need it, just have to wait til then. I am scared and all the other things going on in my life is another story. I have a husband and three kids who depend on me for things and I know I need to pull out of this. I have been like this since June when I tried the digitals for 8 weeks and then found someone who made custom analog bte for me. They sound different, so close to my old ones that still work.. I have two pairs that work. I can't seem to get them to where I can be happy with them.. stubborn I am being and making myself miserable according to my hubby.
 
MelissaWatt said:
I am having to wait til the end of October to get help. I know I need it, just have to wait til then. I am scared and all the other things going on in my life is another story. I have a husband and three kids who depend on me for things and I know I need to pull out of this. I have been like this since June when I tried the digitals for 8 weeks and then found someone who made custom analog bte for me. They sound different, so close to my old ones that still work.. I have two pairs that work. I can't seem to get them to where I can be happy with them.. stubborn I am being and making myself miserable according to my hubby.
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Perseveration.

It's a pattern of thinking that is part of your mental illness.

The hearing aids are not really your problem at all. Your illness is taking that and making it the focus.

No one here can help you. You really need mental health care.
 
Bottesini said:
Perseveration.

It's a pattern of thinking that is part of your mental illness.

The hearing aids are not really your problem at all. Your illness is taking that and making it the focus.

No one here can help you. You really need mental health care.
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I do agree. Its ok for getting a help.
 
Bottesini said:
Perseveration.

It's a pattern of thinking that is part of your mental illness.

The hearing aids are not really your problem at all. Your illness is taking that and making it the focus.

No one here can help you. You really need mental health care.
Click to expand...

I know.. I see what I am doing and it's really annoying me. I didn't have a care in the world about my hearing aids and my loss until May/June. I felt complete as person. I never did think of myself as profound and nor did I depend on anything. Now it's different that my audi of 14 yrs left me high and dry and trying to find one that will help is a different story. Walking in and being told you have to switch to digital and dealing with the constant changes for 8 weeks and knowing you aren't hearing clearly like you did before.. it was awful.. I was on sensory overload.. it had me hiding from my kids and hubby and not going out to enjoy things. I didn't want to hear the humming of the fridge in the restaurant or the dimming of noise that was normal to me. My kids.. sounded completely different to the point I didn't like my daughters voice. It hurt me beyond what you may understand, in my heart, my feelings, and my ears. I was taught to be independent and not rely on other things.. alarms, dog, lights, etc.. I know I need help.. that I am trying to get.. believe me..
Just wanted input from the general crowd what I should do.. give up and go back to my old analogs and be happy again, or deal with the current custom analog. I know at some point neither of these things will be working or available in the future.. digital will be my future.. unless the aids I have continue to work.. that is the dilemma.. I don't know how long they will work and who can fix them..
 
I would talk to you more see if it help but time difference and late for me now.hope you get resaloution asap
 
Why do have to wait so long to see someone can you to find someone else to see , I think you should go see your primary doctor and let them know what is going and see if they can speed things up for you. I think it's nuts having someone wait a whole month to get mental health care.
 
whatdidyousay! said:
Why do have to wait so long to see someone can you to find someone else to see , I think you should go see your primary doctor and let them know what is going and see if they can speed things up for you. I think it's nuts having someone wait a whole month to get mental health care.
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I am a military retiree dependent. I don't even see the same PCM for me every time I go in. The doctors are on rotation. Mine just left me and I have not been reassigned a new doctor yet. I saw a NP for the time being. I was referred in.. that takes two business days and then you have to call in for your appt. Then the appt calendar is usually full from the previous month from other patients needing care. They book up fast and the active duty personnel are first on the list and their dependents.When you retire.. the story changes for the dependent, not the actual retiree.. My hubby can get his care immediately if needed or the VA will take him in. It's really messed up system.
 
MelissaWatt said:
I am a military retiree dependent. I don't even see the same PCM for me every time I go in. The doctors are on rotation. Mine just left me and I have not been reassigned a new doctor yet. I saw a NP for the time being. I was referred in.. that takes two business days and then you have to call in for your appt. Then the appt calendar is usually full from the previous month from other patients needing care. They book up fast and the active duty personnel are first on the list and their dependents.When you retire.. the story changes for the dependent, not the actual retiree.. My hubby can get his care immediately if needed or the VA will take him in. It's really messed up system.
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Call Obama and tell him to fix the mess.
 
no.. call Congress. I doubt Obama can do anything to change any of it all by himself. Plus that's not going to help. Nobody in government will me of much help right now anyway.

Hopefully once you get it, things will go smoother for you Melissa.
 
MelissaWatt said:
Does anyone ever think about their future.. when you can't hear and have become elderly to the point you are in the hospital or in a nursing home facility.
I had an eye opener this past few weeks seeing my 84 yr old grandmother who was in the hospital and recently transferred to a nursing home. I saw the treatment she recieved and I honestly became scared about how it would be for me. Having someone help me put my aid in my ears should I lose my ability to do so or change my battery. I actually am scared of what my life will be after seeing the carelessness in my grandmothers care. My hubby thinks I am over thinking this now. I told him, what if you go before me or you lose your ability to help me. The kids may not care or we need to be cared for by someone. This depresses me so much.
:(
Click to expand...

My father cared for a man that had lost his wife years ago, he was near blind and unable to care for himself. His daughter came to care for him on weekends (she lived out of state). His dog was the light of his life. He fell and had to go to a nursing home. His daughter needed to sell the home and he had to give up the dog. His days and nights were spent in one chair and then the bed with a man that was senile and woke him during the night. He passed only a few weeks back. I'd rather go quick. I take care of my parents but I have no one so when they go, I'm alone and that scares me. I have no friendships or relationships. I'm getting my promotion at work on the 6th and I'm working hard to get another job with more income. I'll never allow my parents to end up in a home and go through that like that poor man did.

Laura
 
I understand your fear, but pull yourself together. We're not exactly helpless here.

Dealing with the issues of old age is not a deaf thing, it effects everyone.

Just relax and go visit your relatives. When they know people come to visit they take better care of the patient.

You'll be OK.
 
VacationGuy234 said:
I understand your fear, but pull yourself together. We're not exactly helpless here.

Dealing with the issues of old age is not a deaf thing, it effects everyone.

Just relax and go visit your relatives. When they know people come to visit they take better care of the patient.

You'll be OK.
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You don't just pull your together when you have depression and anxiety . My ex husband had anxiety attacks and felt like he could not breath and worried about his health all the time. He could not get over it like a common cold. Mental illness is not something you just snap out of.
 
I think I understand your situation of feeling depress and worried about your future of being old and not be able to take care of yourself. You want to know if someone will come and take care of you instead of going into nursing home. I had noticed many times on videos or pictures having Elderly patients being abused and not being properly taken care of. Nursing homes are hard to find good ones. There might be few nursing homes in good standing and better care for the Elderly patients.

For me, I would suggest you might tried to go see a Social Worker or Counselor about your problem of being fear and worry about your future. They are suppose to be good listeners and would help you solve your fear of being in a nursing home.

I know that if I can not take care of myself and find myself going into the nursing home, then I don't have any choice. There is nothing I could do about it. I just hope I will be in a good nursing home someday. It is not easy. :(
 
why do people go to nursing homes? its cheaper. some places are so cheap on labor and dont care about real quality life so you dont see the problem till too late.

do you want to be in complete control of this for your future ?! easy .. it starts with money and resources. its not gonna be found later and in nursing homes.
you see - you gotta be rich, or work hard and save every penny and not enjoy life at all and then hire private staff to take care of you 24/7 the way you want to be.

Lets see -- work hard and not enjoy life? what kind of life is that?! what if you die before you are old enough to lose your mind? what a waste. I'd would enjoy life NOW and tell my kids when I lose my mind - make sure i dont get abused, etc.
 
MelissaWatt said:
Does anyone ever think about their future.. when you can't hear and have become elderly to the point you are in the hospital or in a nursing home facility.
I had an eye opener this past few weeks seeing my 84 yr old grandmother who was in the hospital and recently transferred to a nursing home. I saw the treatment she recieved and I honestly became scared about how it would be for me. Having someone help me put my aid in my ears should I lose my ability to do so or change my battery. I actually am scared of what my life will be after seeing the carelessness in my grandmothers care. My hubby thinks I am over thinking this now. I told him, what if you go before me or you lose your ability to help me. The kids may not care or we need to be cared for by someone. This depresses me so much.
:(
Click to expand...

how would you like to be taken care of when you become an elderly? a nicer retirement community?
 
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