The gift of hearing....do you cherish it?

[posts from hell]

Who is this "we" crapolo nonsense? And now all of a sudden people come running to the defense saying, "Oh, yeah, we are open to discussion" but it has to be "positive"..??

Oh, really?

*checking past posts*

I am open to any discussion whether it's a negative or positive viewpoint. The crux of it is how one can handle other people's opinions.

If you were open, you would have answered my questions.

 

[kokonut]

If you were open, you would have answered my questions.

You were never open. That's the thing.

 

[somedeafdudefromPNW]

Who is attacking who? The audists attacking Deaf people's way of life or the other way around? Thanks for clarifying.

Both way, actually. A few CI bloggers left because they got tired of sorting out the mess of the ones that disapprove of CIs. Honestly, if you're going to publish your blog on a generalist bloglist like that, you should be expecting someone to be nasty.

The rudest one I got was a blogger who didn't like the fact I put down oralism... clicked on the link under his or her name... and it was some missionary school in India. I would had approved it anyway... but the fact the name was linked to a missionary school made me hold it back since I don't approve of advertising.

 

[shel90]

Both way, actually.

The rudest one I got was a blogger who didn't like the fact I put down oralism... clicked on the link under his or her name... and it was some missionary school in India. I would had approved it anyway... but the fact the name was linked to a missionary school made me hold it back since I don't approve of advertising.

Nothing new under the sun with marketing.

 

[posts from hell]

You were never open. That's the thing.

Show me where. I said I wanted to KNOW, which also means I wanted to learn, which also means .... i'm open.
Shocking, I know.

 

[Berry]

Thanks for the arm chair analysis.

I will run out and buy an arm chair as soon as possible so as to validate your assumption.

My efforts and opinions are not done at an unconscious level. I am aware that some are sensitive and how their sensibilities are easily upset even before I press the submit button.

The first sentence is a statement. Pardon me if I doubt it because the second sentence places the entire burden of your communication on the reader. If they take offense to something you post it is their fault for being too sensitive. You exclude the possibility you could improve the wording of your post to one more neutral.

My question was directed at participants or readers who do have beneficial hearing lleft and whether they do cherish it. Not about trapping people which you seem to be alluding to.

Not sure what beneficial hearing is.

Trapping is not the word I would use. If I thought it were deliberate I would think of it more as verbal bullying and suggest anyone compelled by it to read Suzette Hayden Elgin's excellent work "The Gentle Art of Verbal Self Defense."

But why do you select a few and ask a biased question when it would be just as easy to ask everyone an equally or more informative non biased questions such as "How much hearing do you have and how do you feel about it?"

Are you in fact saying that these things cannot or should not be discussed because AD? And that AD is only for Deaf people? Because I don't see that unless Calvin plan on changing that in the very near future. Kind of like the DeafRead thing. People got all upset because DR allowed links to blogs on cochlear implants, cued speech, hard of hearing issues, pro AGBell, pro-oral/aural, and so on.

That is a derailer. I never mentioned the subject matter, only the manner in which it was presented.

I'm actually trying to be helpful by showing you how and why people are legitimately upset at your post and indicating how the same subject can be discussed in respectful terms rather than in pejorative terms.

Deaf or not we hear your unstated assumptions loud and clear.

 

[kokonut]

If there isn't any, then how can it be shown that you were open? I don't see any evidence of that. Instead, you wanted to play the bandwagon leader.

 

[posts from hell]

If there isn't any, then how can it be shown that you were open? I don't see any evidence of that. Instead, you wanted to play the bandwagon leader.

Funny, Bandwagon leader? I have no idea of that.
I asked you a specific question since you said your hearing enables you to much bigger things in life. That in itself states that you're "better" than the people who are deaf.
I am constantly failing at one thing which is figuring what "much bigger things" I am missing out on. I can't think of any.

*edit* So I am welcoming your help on figuring that out.

 

[Mrs Bucket]

Pride goes before the fall, kokonut and it's going to a mighty long fall for you. I suspect your ego is going to take a mighty long time to heal.

 

[dreama]

The first sentence is a statement. Pardon me if I doubt it because the second sentence places the entire burden of your communication on the reader. If they take offense to something you post it is their fault for being too sensitive. You exclude the possibility you could improve the wording of your post to one more neutral.

I think you've got the wrong end of the stick here.
A lot of posters are like that, but they don't all get attacked in the way Kokonut is.

I think that it's more a question of wether you accept the status que or not. If you have differant views then you will get attacked however they are worded, and besides some people are plain speakers and are no good at mincing their words. I'm no good at that either, but I do feel I have a right to express myself and so does Kokonut.

You mention bullying, but I don't see Kokonut as being a bully here. I see it more a case that people are very quick to get offended by his posts and have made some really rude comments.

I very strongly disagree with Kokonut when it comes to Audism, but I won't jump on the band wagon since I've noticed so much attacking going on recently. I felt attacked and for a while I got so sick of it all that I stopped comming so frequently.

Deaf or not we hear your unstated assumptions loud and clear.

Kokonut is also deaf.

 

[kokonut]

my quotes in bold..

I will run out and buy an arm chair as soon as possible so as to validate your assumption.

Was that supposed to be a repartee'?

The first sentence is a statement. Pardon me if I doubt it because the second sentence places the entire burden of your communication on the reader. If they take offense to something you post it is their fault for being too sensitive. You exclude the possibility you could improve the wording of your post to one more neutral.

No, not exclude the possibility. Rather, I am conscious of my choice. I see my hearing (what's left of it) as a gift and I cherish it. Simply put. And you want me to make it as neutral as possible? Ok. Let me just simply throw that one out the window and proclaim my hearing (what's left of it) is a curse then?

Not sure what beneficial hearing is.

Anything that you can derive beneficial use out of it may it be for communication use, the enjoyment of music, etc

.

Trapping is not the word I would use. If I thought it were deliberate I would think of it more as verbal bullying and suggest anyone compelled by it to read Suzette Hayden Elgin's excellent work "The Gentle Art of Verbal Self Defense."

It is exactly that word. The concept describes it exactly so in your earlier example. Either way you answer it, "yes" or "no", you end up looking the worse off.

But why do you select a few and ask a biased question when it would be just as easy to ask everyone an equally or more informative non biased questions such as "How much hearing do you have and how do you feel about it?"

Because I decided to specifically choose that question whether one cherishes his/her hearing (what's left of it regardless of how much).

That is a derailer. I never mentioned the subject matter, only the manner in which it was presented.

I'm actually trying to be helpful by showing you how and why people are legitimately upset at your post and indicating how the same subject can be discussed in respectful terms rather than in pejorative terms.

Thanks for your help. Because it's funny, I asked a very similar question in a forum of mostly hard of hearing participants some years back and as far as I could tell most if not all of them stated in the positive that they, too, cherished (i used a different word but it had the same flavor) what they had left and make the best out of it. But no backlash with the "How....*sputters*... dare you!!" But, hey, if they want to make this into an only Deaf forum where only Deaf topics shall be discussed in a manner consistent with Deaf idealogy and such, then that's fine. I can leave and not worry about asking those questions..

Deaf or not we hear your unstated assumptions loud and clear.

such as??

 

[posts from hell]

I think you've got the wrong end of the stick here.
A lot of posters are like that, but they don't all get attacked in the way Kokonut is.

I think that it's more a question of wether you accept the status que or not. If you have differant views then you will get attacked however they are worded, and besides some people are plain speakers and are no good at mincing their words. I'm no good at that either, but I do feel I have a right to express myself and so does Kokonut.

You mention bullying, but I don't see Kokonut as being a bully here. I see it more a case that people are very quick to get offended by his posts and have made some really rude comments.

I very strongly disagree with Kokonut when it comes to Audism, but I won't jump on the band wagon since I've noticed so much attacking going on recently. I felt attacked and for a while I got so sick of it all that I stopped comming so frequently.



Kokonut is also deaf.

Dreama,
I'm not trying to attack him. I'm trying to ask him a few questions - over and over - which he wouldn't answer.
That's the issue for me. He throws a controversial topic and evades questions that is specific so it can be clarified when he says something.

It's getting old for me.

 

[kokonut]

Funny, Bandwagon leader? I have no idea of that.
I asked you a specific question since you said your hearing enables you to much bigger things in life. That in itself states that you're "better" than the people who are deaf.
I am constantly failing at one thing which is figuring what "much bigger things" I am missing out on. I can't think of any.

*edit* So I am welcoming your help on figuring that out.

It's a misconstruct on your part to see it that way. What my hearing provides it allows me greater access to sound and communication opportunities than without it. My hearing, what's left of it, is enabled with the help of a technolgy called "hearing aid" which enables me to enjoy and take advantage of the sound around me in a variety of ways. I am stating it from an advantageous point of view. It's something that I have cherished always. However I put it people will continue to twist what I say as to mean "better than you."

 

[kokonut]

Dreama,
I'm not trying to attack him. I'm trying to ask him a few questions - over and over - which he wouldn't answer.
That's the issue for me. He throws a controversial topic and evades questions that is specific so it can be clarified when he says something.

It's getting old for me.

The thing is you have constantly been on the attack in the past. Why would I give you the benefit of a doubt and answer your question in the first place? In short, lend my ear.

 

[kokonut]

Pride goes before the fall, kokonut and it's going to a mighty long fall for you. I suspect your ego is going to take a mighty long time to heal.

Well, I've always believed in communication access in a variety of formats and modes to all people with hearing loss, I don't see how that is pride when we're all in the same boat. I have a set of beliefs and passion that I go by, so, if you want to call me an audist just so you can feel better, then go ahead. I won't stop you.

 

[Berry]

I will run out and buy an arm chair as soon as possible so as to validate your assumption.

It could be called repartee. Calling my post an armchair analysis implies dismissal of it as coming from someone not qualified to speak on the issue. I chose to make a joke out of it rather than become offended.

Trapping is not the word I would use. If I thought it were deliberate I would think of it more as verbal bullying and suggest anyone compelled by it to read Suzette Hayden Elgin's excellent work "The Gentle Art of Verbal Self Defense."

It is exactly that word. The concept describes it exactly so in your earlier example. Either way you answer it, "yes" or "no", you end up looking the worse off.

When people feel trapped into agreeing to things, or taking actions, they would really rather not then it is bullying. Salesmen do it all the time and call it good salesmanship.

It is a way of offering choices so the one the person would instinctively choose seems inappropriate.

Deaf or not we hear your unstated assumptions loud and clear.

such as??

You state it here very well yourself:

I see my hearing (what's left of it) as a gift and I cherish it. Simply put.

Here you state how you feel. No frills, no verbal games. No implication that anyone else has an obligation to feel or think the same. It is a statement that cannot be disagreed or argued with and I doubt if anyone would try to change you.

I wonder what the response would be if you had said that at the beginning and asked how many people feel the same way.

And you want me to make it as neutral as possible?

You just did it and did a wonderful job of it.

 

[Berry]

A lot of posters are like that, but they don't all get attacked in the way Kokonut is.

You are probably right.

I think that it's more a question of wether you accept the status que or not. If you have differant views then you will get attacked however they are worded, and besides some people are plain speakers and are no good at mincing their words. I'm no good at that either, but I do feel I have a right to express myself and so does Kokonut.

To a degree you are right, and to a degree it is too complex a subject to discuss without hijacking the thread. I am here because after lurking around a while I decided I was in agreement with prevailing points of view here.

To me being polite is telling a woman "I prefer your other dress."

Not mincing words is telling her "I don't like that dress at all."

But it is just plain rude to tell her "Your dress is an eyesore." even if you think so.

Saying "Don't you wish you had better taste in clothing" or "Maybe you should allow me to pick out your dress next time." is uncalled for and falls under verbal abuse.

You mention bullying, but I don't see Kokonut as being a bully here. I see it more a case that people are very quick to get offended by his posts and have made some really rude comments.

My studying of linguistics tells me he consistently uses words in ways designed to draw out an emotional reactions rather than well thought out intellectual responses.

Kokonut is also deaf.

My comments have nothing to do with who is deaf or who is not. Nor do they have anything to do with the subject matter.

My comments are on the manner of presentation.

 

[jillio]

If you ever visit B.C., I will get you all the salmons you ever wanted... either that or you can opt for some West Coast special brownies.

Smoked salmon? I'm on my way!!! And the midwest does some great special brownies as well. I'll be happy to share my recipe privately.:P

 

[jillio]

No. I was responding to Mrs Bucket about how I may become completely deaf someday but that idea wasn't lost on me. Hence, my not taking my hearing for granted but as a gift to be cherished today.

Scares the hell out of you, too, doesn't it?

 

[saywhatkid]

Smoked salmon? I'm on my way!!! And the midwest does some great special brownies as well. I'll be happy to share my recipe privately.:P

Oh no....Space Cake!