[UPDATE BELOW] In a TV interview this month, Mitt Romney's wife Ann insisted, "There's a wild and crazy man inside of [Mitt Romney] just waiting to come out." How wild and crazy is he? Well, when he was a teenager at boarding school in 1965, he was so crazed by a fellow student's slightly long hair that he organized a wild mob that held the boy down while Romney cut off the offensive locks, as his victim wept. Which we guess isn't that wild and crazy when you compare it to that one time a young George W. Bush branded a dude.
Today the Washington Post has a long article (by Internet standards) about Romney's days at the Michigan private school Cranbrook. Reporter Jason Horowitz corroborated the haircut incident with five former students who gave their accounts independently of one another. Romney was never disciplined, but the recipient of the trim, John Lauber, was later expelled. Back in 1965 he was a shy teen who was teased for "presumed homosexuality." Things got worse when he returned from break with bleached-blond hair that draped over one eye—a look that stood out at Cranbrook, which was largely favored by briefcase-carrying Republicans. According to what Horowitz pieced together:
“He can’t look like that. That’s wrong. Just look at him!” an incensed Romney told Matthew Friedemann, his close friend in the Stevens Hall dorm, according to Friedemann’s recollection. Mitt, the teenaged son of Michigan Gov. George Romney, kept complaining about Lauber’s look, Friedemann recalled.
A few days later, Friedemann entered Stevens Hall off the school’s collegiate quad to find Romney marching out of his own room ahead of a prep school posse shouting about their plan to cut Lauber’s hair. Friedemann followed them to a nearby room where they came upon Lauber, tackled him and pinned him to the ground. As Lauber, his eyes filling with tears, screamed for help, Romney repeatedly clipped his hair with a pair of scissors.
"It happened very quickly, and to this day it troubles me,” said [Thomas] Buford, the school’s wrestling champion, who said he joined Romney in restraining Lauber. Buford subsequently apologized to Lauber, who was “terrified,” he said. “What a senseless, stupid, idiotic thing to do.” ... "It was a hack job,” recalled Phillip Maxwell, a childhood friend of Romney who was in the dorm room when the incident occurred. “It was vicious."
Lauber was later kicked out for getting caught smoking a cigarette, and went on to lead a peripatetic life that included getting an embalming license and touring with the Royal Lipizzaner Stallion riders. He died of liver cancer in 2004, but in the mid-90s one of the students who witnessed the incident ran into him in an airport. “Hey, you’re John Lauber,” David Seed recalled saying. "I’m sorry that I didn’t do more to help in the situation." (And by "more," he presumably means "anything.") After a pause, Lauber admitted it was "horrible," that he was "terrified" during the incident and had thought a lot about it since.
It's unclear how much that wild and crazy Romney has thought about it. His campaign refused to let Horowitz interview the candidate for the article—saying simply that Romney didn't recall the incident. We're guessing he doesn't recall any of the other incidents relayed by classmates, including how Romney once guided a nearly blind teacher into a closed door on purpose and how his expression appeared to sour when a classmate said he was from East Detroit and his father was a school teacher. You can read the article in full here—it's an edifying look at formative years of the man who might very well be president. SPOILER ALERT: He's kind of an asshole.
Update 10:45 a.m.: In a radio interview this morning, Romney commented on Barbergate, offering a typical hedged "boys will be boys" non-apology apology:
Romney on WAPO piece on pranks: "Back in high school I did some dumb things and if anybody was hurt by that or offended by that I apologize"
Romney on high school pranks: "If I did stupid things, I'm afraid I've got to say sorry for it. "
Classic. Why on earth is it so hard for politicians to straight-up apologize like decent human bei—oh, right.