Parents apathy in their deaf child's educational progress etc

Thank you all!
I have a friend who has 2 Deaf kids with CI's, (she was the first parent I ever met that I didn't want to smack) she had researched and decided that she wanted to give her children everything, so she implanted them and then used ASL (well, more like CASE, but COME ON, she tried!) at home. She has one child who is totally oral, she signs with him, but he refuses. He is mainstreamed at a local school. Her other child doesn't speak and attends the bi-bi school with my daughter now. She told me she wished she had been brave enough not to implant her kids. She told me she still looks at them and cries, she told me that we "are the family we wished she had been strong enough to be". That was a huge compliment because by all outside observers her son is exactly what people think all Deaf people should become. He is mainstreamed and a hearing/speaking child....and is mother wishes he would sign
 
faire_jour said:
Thank you all!
I have a friend who has 2 Deaf kids with CI's, (she was the first parent I ever met that I didn't want to smack) she had researched and decided that she wanted to give her children everything, so she implanted them and then used ASL (well, more like CASE, but COME ON, she tried!) at home. She has one child who is totally oral, she signs with him, but he refuses. He is mainstreamed at a local school. Her other child doesn't speak and attends the bi-bi school with my daughter now. She told me she wished she had been brave enough not to implant her kids. She told me she still looks at them and cries, she told me that we "are the family we wished she had been strong enough to be". That was a huge compliment because by all outside observers her son is exactly what people think all Deaf people should become. He is mainstreamed and a hearing/speaking child....and is mother wishes he would sign
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You know, I have been told by a couple of members of this board that by not implanting my son and insisting on a bi-bi atmosphere for him that I took the "easy" way out. Of course, they were also parents of implanted children, and were using oral only education and home environment for their chidlren.

My own son is now 22, is a college student with a 3.5 GPA, and has oral skills if he needs them. He prefers sign. He is happy and well adjusted. If he wants to be implanted, he is free to make that decision. However, because he was raised with an environment that gave him skills in both languages, and the ability to achieve no matter the environment he finds himself in, he does not see how an implant would improve the quality of his life. He chooses not to be implanted at this time.
 
faire_jour said:
Easy? Maybe. Right? For sure.
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No doubt. And it was easier for him to acquire language in the manner that was most natural for him. It was easier for him to find his identity when he had role models and others around him who supported who he was, rather than having to pretend to be something he wasn't. Was it easier to raise a deaf child without an implant. Heck, it isn't easy to raise any child! LOL.
 
jillio said:
No doubt. And it was easier for him to acquire language in the manner that was most natural for him. It was easier for him to find his identity when he had role models and others around him who supported who he was, rather than having to pretend to be something he wasn't. Was it easier to raise a deaf child without an implant. Heck, it isn't easy to raise any child! LOL.
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I will never understand how undertaking a new language and culture for your son would be the "easy" way out. That just doesnt make sense at all. :roll:
 
Because we don't out the time and effort into drilling words into our child's head until they are able to parrot them back!
 
the reason I have chosen to give her hearing aids and do speech/listening therapy is because it never hurts to offer. I am giving her the opportunity to develop some oral skills,
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Excellent!!! And I agree.....oral skills are an awesome thing to have! Continue with developing them. Virtually all the orally skilled dhh kids I know are very glad we have that particualr skill. It's just that we are mad that it was our ONLY tool for such a long time. And the opposite can be true too............I know of Sign only teens who wish they'd had the opertuntity to have some oral skills/training as kids.
The key is: Make it FUN! The trouble with speech therapy is that it can get very tedius and boring. Don't over therapize her aquastion of oral skills. Also, don't be afraid to supplement with private therapy, such as some auditory-verbal therapy. You could go and see the speech therapist at your daughter's school, and see what they say, and if they have any ideas or anything.
 
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