my sister & drugs "Paraphernalia and crack-cocain

[Liebling:-)))]

You and I are the same shoes. My sister is a drug addict, has been in rehabs, half-way house, jail you name it..

I’m afraid yes. It’s an exactly what my sister did. She was put in jail few times for mugger, burglar, etc for money to buy drugs. She was put rehab, physical hospital, secure home, etc. for past years.

What I've learned from this is You, your dad, brother and niece are co-dependent.

co-dependent? Honestly, I really don’t know either it’s co-dependency what we did for my mother & sister.… I guess it’s depend on different situation what/how co-dependency lead to.

Well, how could we watch someone we love to death instead of do something to help them?

Let me tell you the example what I had been through in the past.

1. We (my siblings & I) witnessed the horror situation what our mother did due her alcoholic/domestic abusive. What should we do? Should we enjoy ourselves to watch her? No, we do SOMETHING to help her is empty the bottles into toilet. We received physical abuse by her after found out that her bottles are empty. It’s her who drove our love for her away.

2. My hubby & I spend our month vacation at my sister & family’s house in December 1991. We found her 2 little children (6 & 4 years old) waiting in the kitchen for their breakfast. They look scared as I fixed the breakfast for them. I put cereal, toasts, butter, jams and each glass of milk on the breakfast table. They are scared & took them few minutes to touch & eat & drink. My sister & her bf woke up and was panic when they saw us in the kitchen. I calmed her and told her that it’s me who fixed the breakfast for them. She told me off that the milk is suppose for cereal only, not glass of milk & then call me for give them too much milk which it’s too expensive. Her kids knew very well that they are supposed to choose toasts or cereal for their breakfast, not both. If they want to drink something then use water tap with favor powder. I apologized her for inference her children education. We went to food shopping with children to support my sister. We bought anything what the children really like. The children are happy to have milk shakes, plenty of milk that they can drink. Sue was mad when she saw something what she never buy and told me off again and then accused us for “run away” to Germany to laugh her ass to struggle with her upset children with these foods, she doesn’t achieve to. She said that we forget quickly that we have everything what she don’t have. I was like All what I do is apologize her all the time because we only meant good with her & her family. It’s many what we dislike but we swallowed ourselves to witness her & her bf spend money on video rental almost everyday, weekly “Hello” magazine, porcelains collection for her closet until few days before end of our vacation she bitch us again for “spoil” her children. We can’t take it anymore & then tell her something what we think & suggest her to cut her budgets to support her children with better foods. That’s how we fall out because she don’t like what we did with her children is “inference her family life”.

You all are trying to help her to stay out of the drug habit.

Yes, but it’s not just drug habit but problem with her children, too. It’s her children, we consider. They are problematic children. They both also tried with drugs, too. Sue bought cannabis for her son 15th birthday. Now he’s 20 years old and addict to cannabis smoking. Sue allowed her teenage daughter to sniff glue with plastic but it’s good that she’s survived. Now she’s over 17 years old and got a good job. It’s too much for my Dad to take the responsible for her children.

Your dad is doing the right thing by taking your niece. She's the #1 factor that needs to be taken away from a drug addict.

Exactly

I know its hurting you all alot.. but your dad need to stop helping her and move on. Your sister knows that if she goes back again and again, her dad will always come to her rescue. He does need to stop that. Something is going to happen to your sister but she chose to do what she want to do. Maybe one day, something may wake her up and realize what's she doing to herself and her family.. When she has no one to turn to, no one to help her, she'll get to the point she needs help and will want ya'll back into her life but don't let it off real easy. Its very hard to get out of that situation. All you can do is let her know you love her.. but you can't stop her. I'm sorry you're going thru this. just be strong and have faith that things will change to the better.

Yes, I’m not angry with Dad for that because I know he done awful A LOT for her in the past. I can understand him & accept the fact that we have to let her go. It's very hurtful... Yes, Sue know we love her. I saw her again in 2000. I became good listener to her talk about drug problem, how/why she addicted to drugs due stress. I has no problem with her because I'm patience & good listen to her BUT BUT I'm doubt either she will listen me or not since she's heavy drug addicted which it's no good... if I see her again this year.


*I have to go home now and will reply some of your posts here within hour later.*

 

[Liebling:-)))]

Oh Liebling, While reading your long post about your sister it brought me tears in my eyes. Your father had done what he knows best, He cannot just run to her rescue every time she is back on drugs. To be quite honest Michelle, I don't know If I could walk away from my son and don't turn back because if something happen to him like ending up dead, I wouldn't live with that.

Your dad has to do whatever it takes to get her off drugs, She is addicted to drugs recognizing that she has a problem (like she said, she cannot help herself, but knows she has a problem) is the first step in getting help, which that would be professional help from a trained drug counselor and get the treatments she needs to get in order to stay alive. If that doesn't help, Call the police let her rot in prison if that is the only way to keep her alive and clean from drugs.

Michelle, I know it's helpless situation, nobody wants to see their loved ones on the edge of dying.

Unfortunlately yes, it´s helpless situation.

Yes, she received A LOT of professional helps in the past. She had been tried to be clean dozen of times but it doesn’t work.

The problem is my Dad is too soft with his heart and wants to win Sue’s trust, that’s how he persuaded the doctors to get her out of physical hospital, rebah, etc. etc. etc. dozen of times because she want it. (I believe that he is guilty to being bad father to us in the past, that’s why he wants to make up to be good father to her & us.) which it´s no good.

 

[Liebling:-)))]

MY sister is in a Rehab too. Her husband had to go to Courthouse and and file for Her to go into a program.. so Judge ordered her into 30 days lock up program for her to get some help.. she does NEED to go for longer program but.. in this world.. None is avilable to help unless the person ask for Help... also Most place are tough with the Insurance it does SUCKS!!!

It’s exacty what my Dad told me what he did awful a lot for her – court house, etc. etc. like what you mentioned…

But Liebling, Believe it or not. Your not alone to go thru this, I Had to draw a line on my sister between us because I WILL not allow her to have my kids to sleep over while she drinks/drunk! She is very verbal abusive, and would do any "Aggresative" attack to anybody who doesn't listen to her also when she does NOT want to listen to any of us she will attack us.. This is very not acceptable.. I can understand..

Yes, it´s understandable. It’s an exactly same problem what Sue did to her children. She also escape to the fantastic world, too. She kept saying that Bruce Willis called her from America everyday telling her how much he love her and want marry her, and then God love her and want marry her… blah blah… It look like drug takes her brain over total. I witnessed the situation what my mother did… I know what it is… Horrible… addiction turn people into aggressive.

Yes, I has to agree for not let anyone who are addict on drink or drugs to babysit my children or stay with us. I told Dad to not bring her over to see us for vacation until she is clean......... I dont want my children see it. That´s time we were in England visit my Dad in 2000. Sue called my Dad and want to see us. I told him to check with her either she is sober or not because I dont want my children see it. My brother check with her and then call us that we can go over. She´s happy to see us. They leave us alone to talk each other. I make her to tell me everything why she do that. She said that she can´t stand anyone who judge her and her children upbringing and said with crazy laugh that Dad became caring & good father for a first time, why can´t he do that in the past. It´s too suddenly to her. She felt it´s too late for him to try to be good father. I told her to forgive him and remember that everyone are mistakes. I forgave him long time ago. I told her that she should be glad to have him who do awful alot for her. We talked & talked.... My niece (that´s time she was 12 or 13 years old) & her friends played with my children in her bedroom. My son Danny came to me & show “glue” on his hand. I was shock and asked him what he do with glue at niece´s bedroom? He said that he should smell it. I look at Sue and asked her that it´s glue with plastic, niece sniff? She said NOTHING. I told her why could she do that to her daughter... I went upstair and saw her sniff the glue with her friends. I knew straight way that it´s no good to continue stay with her until evening. I told her polite that we have to go... She said NOTHING and look like that she need drug badly... Dad is surprised to see us which he thought we arrived at late evening. I told him what happened. Dad told me that Sue allow her children to smoke and also use drugs, too. I told Dad to do SOMETHING to save children but Dad is toooo soft.

My mother was on my doorstep drunk with 3 men during midnight, that´s time Danny was 2 years old in 1995. It´s unexpect to see her like this. I wondered how she travel to Germany? I know it´s hard because she is my mother but I stay firm and dont want to let her to destory my life where I build a new life with my family in Germany. I took her back to Embassy on next day to send her back to England. I ignored her nasty name-calling on us. Thank God, Danny didn´t see her. He was at Grandparent´s house.

The reason I must do because my family comes first.

 

[Liebling:-)))]

LieblingDarling, I'm sorry that you and your family have to go through this. I agree with Wendy and her post.

As much as I know you wish to help your dear sister, you can't unless she wants to heal herself first. Just remember that we are here to support you and it is always hard to want to heal your own loved ones when they don't want to be helped or healed, eh?

Very true, I know it’s very hard what I witnessed horror what my mother had through.. now Sue… It´s very helpless situation. We have to let her go and has to make her realize that nobody help her then she will learn to stand her own feet if she REALLY want to be CLEAN.

 

[Liebling:-)))]

I am so sorry to hear that. Yea have your Dad call the police and send her way to the jail. Also do the Tough Love. Plus have your Dad call the child protective service to help with your sweet neice. This way Dad can get a legal guardianship. Good luck and I agree with the ppl above posted.

Yes, Child Protective Service took her 2 kids away to foster family when they were little & her ex-bf is custody of her 3rd child, they produced a child together. (2 kids come from her affair with married man). They put her physical hospital until she is fit. Unfortunately her kids become problematic children. Her son beat her mother up and used weapon to damage her furniture…. Dad call Child Protective Service again to take her son away to secure home to improve his emotional behavior. The court see impossible for Sue to cope with her drug problems so they gave Dad a legal guardianship for her. The money for her from Social Department goes to him, not her. Unfortunately what Dad tried hard is not work because it got her to mug people for the money, also burgle people’s house to buy drugs. She was put in jail but Dad bailed her out. (*sigh*) I believe he’s guilty for being bad father in the past and want to be good father to her… sigh He see no chance to help her with money so he let her to have money whatever she wants which it´s better than got her into criminal...

 

[Liebling:-)))]

Very true! nobody can help addict. The first person who can help an addict is an addict himself or herself. It is the first of 12 steps in recovery. Complete admittance and complete realization of defeatation is the key to true recovery. Without this 1st step, no matter how hard anyone try to help, even the judges, cops, jail, blah blah blah can change this person. That is why it is usually the best way to let this person go on his or her own course to crash and find himself or herself at rock bottom to realize that he or she is in deep Sh*t and sees nobody hands for help, that is where the turn point and start that first magic step. Addiction itself is cunning, baffling and powerful. mind with addiction knew how to play games with people and use them to support their addiction. When the addict find himself or herself with NOBODY to help, he or she knew that he or she can no longer play games.
Libeling, Im sorry to hear your horror. Hope you can find peace and serenity, yet do NOT give up yet! There WILL be one day that there is big turn around.

Very True, I notice that Sue play on Dad in manipulative way because she KNEW he’s guilty & want to be good father. She didn’t realized how hurt she did to us.

 

[Liebling:-)))]

wow, your description about your sister is almost same as my sister due behavior problems... *sigh* I know how you feeling.

Liebling.....
When I finish read the paper that I printed it up.. so I can take my time and response to you in a better way....

*rubbing my hands*

boy, this one is really hard on you and everyone else in your family.. Mostly your neiece who lives with her mother and witness on what she has been thru all of her life.. Your father and you can perhaps figure out what to do with your nieces... Have some kind of guardianship or so... Have him go to courthouse to get some temporirly custody of her.. Unless germany has different age limit to live anywhere...

It´s not Germany, but England.

The problem is my Dad is toooo SOFT!!!!!!!!! my niece is supposing to live with her foster family until she is 18 years old but she left too early to go back to live with her mother because she know her mother allow her EVERYTHING what her foster family doesn´t.
I persuaded my Dad to call Children Protection Service about this because of her safety but Dad do not listen me and hopes to have Sue´s trust and give her chance to have her daughter to live with her. Now Dad see himself how worst is.

However, to answer your father.. It has to be come out of your heart, your mind, your emotions, etc..

I got his fax again today asking me what I think of his reaction on Sue at 2 days ago. I´m going to answer his fax today telling him that he doing right to let her go and learn her own way to see either she want the help or not. It hurt him alot because he do awful alot for her & her problematic children for past YEARS.

I could understand this, I have lives with this for many years too... My sister has a problem with her drinking but she doesnt do drugs.. except for medications from her doctor.. Understand this.. she also DOES have biopolar aka Mania Despression... these thing don't work well when you drink with it.. she physically abused to herself, she verbal threat to her own husband and to some of family.. My family has shut her off (told her not to contact us at all until she is sober for long time)... This is very hard too.. But we all have learn to live with what we can do... I do not know if in Germany has a program called Al Anon... These type of meeting that has a group where you can sit down and listen, share your experiences etc how to deal with, how to support with a person who has drugs/driinking problem. For me.. I just told my sister, if she want to see my kids she has to come to MY house, and If I see any booze on her or smell on her I will NOT let her come near my kids.. I have yelled at her few times... I have witness cops coming to her house and my house so many times.. That was E N O U G H... now I am in another state.. away from this Crap.. and I feel so much better.. My father called my mother, and my mother told me that she's in some lock up hospital to get some help! because the Judge agree that she was danger to herself and to her husband from her drinking.. she always called my mother. asking for help. my mom tells her "you have to do this on your own, I can't help you anymore, IM tired of listening this.. " etc you name it all. We all have been thru this... 25 years I believe... She was sober for 9 years I believe and start drink again.. that was "enuff"
So WHAT can you do? nothing, just support your dad, your niece.. make sue to know that You want nothing from her until she stop.. Unless she is Danger to herself or others.. then go to court.. I don't know if Germany does that.. but I do know that there's some kind of program that you can "interevene(spell?)" with counselor, social worker, families together sit down to talk with her. if that success she goes in, If that doesn't success then shes unable to go in..

Yes, I heard good reputation about Al Anon here in Germany. I searched to find out either they have Al Anon in England or not until I found right link. I emailed my brother with Al Anon link straight way today and gave my Dad UK Al Anon´s address by fax.
http://www.al-anonuk.org.uk/contact.php

Yes, I agree everything what you said... What you doing is right to protect your family like what I mentioned in my earlier response post on your post.

*sigh* I know it... My mother & sister kept saying that they give their habit up and want to be clean... Again... Again... Again... Again.... *sigh*

Yes, I know it´s very hard since I found out how kind of drugs she used is dangerous but I has to let her go... I has to give my Dad right because I know he did awful alot for her in the past. He spent quite alot of money on her. *sigh*

She have counsellor, etc. etc. who try to help her... but it´s still the same because Dad is tooo soft to help her out of professional helps they did for her.

But Liebling, You have my email... If you need a chat.. Email me... Or aim me at my cellphone WLBCell.. (Sorry moderators) I best to go back and lay down and rest... and I do wish you and your family a well.. your father and brother are doing the right thing for sue's daughter.. and He did right thing by kick these people out..

BUt tell them. If sue yelled or ask for help.. Have the police go to her house.. so they can see the drugs on the table or anywhere.. that way she can get a wake up calls (sometime with that it might help...)

to your family from me

Yes, I find great what my Dad & brother did to get my niece out of her mother but I think Dad & brother are very lucky because 4 druggies do nothing on them. Normally the druggies would use weapons to hurt my Dad & brother if they threaten them to get out. You know that druggies could be very aggressive when they were out of their head on drugs. I will tell Dad to not do that again in next time to think about his risk life. My opinion, Dad & brother should go to Sue´s place to get my niece without word to Sue & druggies and then call police on Sue and 4 druggies which it´s safety than threaten druggies... You never know one of them are drug dealer and could kill them... I will tell him to call police on her and then put her in jail or whatever because it´s better than let her to death.

Yes, I would love to chat with you via AIM. I will call you if I see you are not on the online in my buddy list.

 

[Liebling:-)))]

wow, Luckysmile23 - it must be awful for you through like this to face your drug deal brother... I´m glad that he stay in jail for long, long time. I´m sorry to hear about your sister & friend.

Dear Leibling,

I am very sorry that you and your family are going thru such an awful time with your sister's addiction. I will pray for you all.

You know that you have much support from everyone at AD, and many ADers posted good suggestions from their experiences.

The bottom line for your sister is she needs to make the decision to get clean, and stick with it. Until she is ready to admit her addiction and need to change, there is a limit to what you and your family can do. The important thing to do right now is focus on rescuing your niece. Also, it is important to not feel guilt about your sister.

You might be able to get some help from:

http://www.al-anon.de/

It is part of Alcoholics Anonymous but they have support groups for family members and teens that have addicts in their families. Much of their support is the same for the families of drug addicts.

Yes, it´s true. I faxed my Dad with those UK address of Al Anon and also emailed my brother with UK Al Anon´s link, too.

Yes, she knows that she is heavily drug addict but why cant she let us help her?

Also, no more trips to Turkey. If anyone in your family is caught with a tiny bit of drugs, even accidentally, it means life in Turkish prison. They are very, very strict against foreign people using, buying, selling, or transporting drugs. Keep your family safe.

Reba

You hitted my head very hard over Turkey´s law because I know about their strict law. I remember Dad´s fax of last month that he took her to Turkey for reward her to be clean from drug. I faxed my Dad straight way after read your post asking him about this. He answered today. I read Dad´s fax for you.
"About our holiday in Turkey, Sue didn´t go, she pulled out a couple of weeks before we left."
It look like that she knew about Turkey´s law.

 

[Liebling:-)))]

Aw Liebling ...

I'm truly sorry to hear what you and your family had gone thru over the years with your sister's drug issue....I competely agree with everyone in this thread, your sister has to be the one to help herself, you and your family can not help her, she has to see that she is addict to drugs, and she needs to take the step to get the help herself without relaying on her family to be there....Your dad did his biggest part by helping her get the help she needed, but now he has to stay back and let her do this on her own....

Your father did the right thing Liebling, I know I've seen families stuggle on trying to get their child some help, but as you can see it's not helping the situation as she still going back on drugs again...and she is the one hurting her family....

I'll be sure to pray on this, hopefully she will turn around and get the help she needs and stay clean and not to go back onto drugs again.....

She has to wake up one day and relized that she is not just hurting herself but the people around her who cares and love her very much....

I´m afraid yes, she should get the help herself... I´m also agree with everyone here.

Yes she hurt her family...

We don´t know either we see good chance for her to get the help because she is in deep & very heavily drug addict now. I am going to suggest Dad to call Police on her and put her jail or whatever for long, long time to save her from death INSTEAD of get doctors to let Sue go or bail her out of jail what he did for her dozen of times... LEAVE HER ALONE to help herself without our help.

 

[Liebling:-)))]

((((((((Liebling)))))))))))

I unds where ur at right now. My brother and his wife had to kicked their daughter, my step neice out of their home and told her never to come home again few months ago because she was stealing their stuffs and she went crazy from being high on meth. It had been so hard on them. My husband told my brother few years ago that she was on drug and my brother denied. Now it hits them hard.

Nothing we can do for her unless she decided to go to rehab and stay sober. It has to be her choice.

Really sad and I am sorry u are dealing with her also.

Yes, I know... it´s same problem with my sister & her son, too. They steal Dad´s money & also their friends´s house, too to buy drug stuff.

What your brother doing is right. Yes, it´s very hard to lose someone you love but we has to let her go and have her choice either she want to stay survive or not. She hurt us badly...

 

[Liebling:-)))]

Leibling,
My husband's sister is a drug addict. Somehow she has never gone to rehab or been arrested. While her father was alive, he bailed her out of all her trouble. After he died, she took out several credit cards in his name, ran up $60,000. Unfortunately, her mother did not turn her in. She just paid off the $. My husband and I told his sister 5 years ago that we love her but we can't be a part of her life until she gets sober. She calls occasionally and leaves a message but we don't call back.
My best friend of 25 years decided that crack was more important than her 2 yr. old daughter. She gave full custody to her exhusband and 6 years later she is still using drugs. She doesn't try to contact me because she knows I won't give her $. She does know that I have stayed involved in her daughters life. I want her daugther to know that once a upon a time, her mother was a great friend and a good person.
You can't change your sister. She has to want sobriety. It's not easy, but you must take care of yourself.
Bearmom

$60,000... Oh dear!

Yes, Sue knows we love her.

Yes, addiction turn people into criminal & aggressive because they need money badly to buy drug stuffs.

Yes, I know nobody can´t change my sister until she want to help HERSELF...

 

[Liebling:-)))]

Thank you everyone again for your loving support...

I´m truly sorry what you had through with your beloved one who hurt you all badly thru their addiction... I feel sad after read most of your sharing posts about your beloved one. I thank you for sharing your experience with us here. I appreciate it very much

 

[Reba]

Liebling,

I suggested the German link to al-anon because it is a useful group for the families of addicts, not just the addicts themselves. They have counselors and groups that can help you know how to cope with your sister's problems. Their group helps the clean non-addict families know what to do about the addicts.

I know that in the U.S., AA provides interpreters for their meetings.

 

[Liebling:-)))]

Liebling,

I suggested the German link to al-anon because it is a useful group for the families of addicts, not just the addicts themselves. They have counselors and groups that can help you know how to cope with your sister's problems. Their group helps the clean non-addict families know what to do about the addicts.

I know that in the U.S., AA provides interpreters for their meetings.

Oh yeah, thank you for link but my British family can´t read German link so I googled to find English link for them. I found link that they have al-anon in England so I emailed link to my brother and faxed the address & phone/fax number to Dad.

Yes, we have al-anon here in Germany. I heard it´s good reputation to build families & friends with self-estreem. It´s great that British have al-anon in London that Dad can connect with them. I told him that it would be great if Sue want the help.

I faxed him again few minutes ago tell him that he doing right to limit himself to help her...

She is my thought & prayer...

 

[FreeWoman77]

i read some are closest relatives, sister/brother/e.t.c. what about husband and wife? wife is sober never using any drugs devote her life to work and faith in family with 2 children but her husband is drug addict he loves his wife afraid of losing her and kids, begs wife not leave him he so much in love with her, even he quited meth only pot, wife got tired of him for being lying if wife knows what he needs money for, pot? she wouldnt help but others he would yell for no reason so wife just hell with him gave money to him that often he cant be off for 1 day or 2 he must have smoking every day 2 or 3 times a day too much she thinks when they got broken she cant help her husband he would loan or pawn she worked hard to pay back for him that often she said she is enough, wanna to divorce for good, but she still loves her husband always in her heart but dissapoint he thinks alot of himself as his pot is his first top of all, family is second they would have wounderful family if husband takes balance pot and family, what u think? i have read or seen people say pot is nothing than meth or cocaine but pot same cause problem in family

 

[Liebling:-)))]

I got a PM from a person. We shared our PM until one of our PMs that he/she gave me permission to open his/her PM here. I respect her/him for not open his/her name here. She/He want to tell you what she/he had an experience to being drug addict in the past.

I just had to pm you after I read your post about your sister. I am a recovering drug addict and I think I should tell you a bit about how your family should deal with your sister.

First of all, this month is my 5th year sober and it is NOT easy. There are bad days when I feel like using again but I refuse to allow myself because I have a great future ahead of me and my kids look up to me. They need a mom who's there for them.

Your sister needs tough love right now. She needs to hit bottom before she asks for help. When she asks for help, give her a list of treatment centres and their phone numbers. She has to call them. Not you or your dad or anyone in your family. She needs to work for her soberity. Your family can only encourage her. Do not ever give her money or bail her out of trouble. If she ends up in jail, don't bail her out. Let her face herself there. If she's serious about getting help, she will get it.

Meanwhile for you and your family, you all need to accept that she may get worse. She may die or end up in jail or mental hospital. She may decide to turn her life around. It will be very hard on you and your family either way. And I do understand. I really do understand your sister and how powerful the drugs are. They are so powerful that they have a very firm grip on people. But it is possible to break that grip.

I really wish I could give you a great big hug because it is a very hard thing to go through. Oh and also, do not ever forget your sister the way she was before she became an addict. Because somewhere deep inside her, she is that person.

 

[Liebling:-)))]

Thank you for share your wonderful & support PMs.

First of all is congrats to you to being sober for 5 years with your strong willing. You want to save your kids being suffer. I admire you for that. It's sad that my sister neglect her 3 kids when they were little. Now they are 20, 17 & 13 years old. Thanks God that my sister ex-bf left her with their 13 years old son to back to his mother when he was toddler... He turn into good lad, not as 20 & 17 years old nephew & niece. Sad. They were trouble with police dozen of times for thief, drugs, mugging, etc.

I feel sad after read my nephew's statement at police office that he really don't know why he did that as my niece, too. Now my 17 yrs. old niece is a good person & has a job. My 20 yrs. old nephew addict to cannbias smoking & job hater... I feel sad for him because no future for him... I'm mad with my sister sometimes after what she do to her children. *sigh* I can't do anything anymore. Yes, I has a good memory about her during our childhood time. We are very closed sisters...

Yes I aware that it's very hard to be clean from drugs.

 

[diehardbiker]

Thats good one, forgot to mention that. Thanks for the reminder.

Liebling,

I suggested the German link to al-anon because it is a useful group for the families of addicts, not just the addicts themselves. They have counselors and groups that can help you know how to cope with your sister's problems. Their group helps the clean non-addict families know what to do about the addicts.

I know that in the U.S., AA provides interpreters for their meetings.

 

[Cookie Monster]

Oh and also, do not ever forget your sister the way she was before she became an addict. Because somewhere deep inside her, she is that person.

To who ever sent that PM, thank you so much because it is true. I've watched documentaries but I know they don't even scratch the surface of the real life horror of being a drug addict. Thank you for sharing your PM with Liebling and thank you Liebling for sharing that with us. We' re all here for you Liebling!

 

[MsGiglz]

Liebling))
Huggs.. I am sorry that you are going through that..

but let me tell you something.. you might disagree with me.. or not.. but its hard.. that what TOUGH LOVE is..

I went through addicts when i was young.. my family.. my sister.. my brother.. gave up on me.. it was tough love..
then.... I tried to quit.. but addicts are hard.. till I married my first ex husband... I less and went to addict support group.. and aa.. i discovered that i was pregnant.. I decided to gave up the addicts.. but stay smoking cig.. ever since.. its been 16 years .. sober.. its NOT easy..
My dad never gave up on me.. his love so strong... he passed on.. that the reason i gave up addicts and the pregnant too..
My mom still loves me but still have trouble to bring the past to present.. like she press buttons.. my brother gave me other chance and became very close.. my sister wont give me other chance, act like that she dont have sister...
Friends and Family gave me other chance after long years soberity.. its hard to trust addict person.. but draw line if that person still addict.. cuz it make your life miserable or get you in trouble too..

hang in there.. huggs..