Mistaken for deaf

ChristineNeely said:
Or if there were more parents like this little girls.

I have a massive idea or theory to introduce to classrooms whenever I have a kid in the future. I think they should start a cultural differences class. i had a special week about it when I was living in Europe in international schools.... May 1st was always May Day and the end of that cultural week where we learned about all the other student's cultures. I think they need a class to tell children from an early age how to say thank you in all different languages, how to assist a person who is blind or handicapped without insulting them, education about mixed families and gay relationships, how to sign the ABC's and basic words in ASL... how to treat a service dog (I had people running after her and scaring her when I worked with one - VERY frustrating) and just how to be a civil person in general. People can be jerks. I think people need to have more sensitivity from a young age.

Most people tease either as children or as adults because they don't understand something. If they had a situation, condition, or stigma working against them I'd love to see how their views changed.
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I had my daughter go to preschool and during snack times my daughter would say "thank you'" to her teacher. The teacher told me she was so surprise to hear a child say "thank you'" Parents are more concerned with being their child best friend than being a parent today, and I heard the parents are talking to their kids less today. And I believe that as when I take my dog for his walks at the park I see mother texting instead of playing with their child.
 
whatdidyousay! said:
I had my daughter go to preschool and during snack times my daughter would say "thank you'" to her teacher. The teacher told me she was so surprise to hear a child say "thank you'" Parents are more concerned with being their child best friend than being a parent today, and I heard the parents are talking to their kids less today. And I believe that as when I take my dog for his walks at the park I see mother texting instead of playing with their child.
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Your daughter is raised right then :)

My parents raised me and my sister without game boys and computer games... I still remember stupid quotes like "Elbows, elbows off the table! We don't live in a horse stable!" and I was taught how not to be rude in different countries before we'd travel - like in England you do NOT knock on the door to the bathroom to see if someone's in there. I'm not saying my sister and I are by means perfect, but I know that when I become a parent some day I'm going to make sure I don't loose touch with how my parents raised me.

Ewww I can't believe I just admitted I'm going to become my mother :giggle:
 
ChristineNeely said:
Your daughter is raised right then :)

I was taught how not to be rude in different countries before we'd travel - like in England you do NOT knock on the door to the bathroom to see if someone's in there.
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I should move to England! I hate it when people knock on the door while I'm in there and I hate even more knocking to see if someone is there. It's like an invasion of privacy. If everyone would just leave the door open when they leave, so we KNOW it's occupied if the door is shut...it would be so much easier for everyone. :D
 
ChristineNeely said:
Your daughter is raised right then :)

My parents raised me and my sister without game boys and computer games... I still remember stupid quotes like "Elbows, elbows off the table! We don't live in a horse stable!" and I was taught how not to be rude in different countries before we'd travel - like in England you do NOT knock on the door to the bathroom to see if someone's in there. I'm not saying my sister and I are by means perfect, but I know that when I become a parent some day I'm going to make sure I don't loose touch with how my parents raised me.

Ewww I can't believe I just admitted I'm going to become my mother :giggle:
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There where no computers around then and I had my child busy learning how swim , ride a bike etc, all the stuff no lone did with or for me as a child.
One of my daughter's teacher in high school told me he wish he had 12 students like my daughter then his job would be so much easier.
 
LadyAbigail said:
I should move to England! I hate it when people knock on the door while I'm in there and I hate even more knocking to see if someone is there. It's like an invasion of privacy. If everyone would just leave the door open when they leave, so we KNOW it's occupied if the door is shut...it would be so much easier for everyone. :D
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HAHAHA I get so paranoid when doors don't lock that someone is going to burst in on me after knocking and I miss it. When I use a bathroom that doesn't lock I intentionally cough every so often so people know it's occupied hahahaha

When I was a really really young kid (kindergarden?) I had a teacher who teased me after I used a bathroom attached to the classroom and would sing to myself.... and the whole class heard. Oops?
 
I love your comments, Christine! :) Something I have noticed is that a lot of times minority groups EXPECT to be victims and use their differences as a crutch or a reason for everything bad that happens to them. Did that person really glare at you because you're black or because you dress and act like a gang member? Did they really not hire you because they think you're disabled or did they just find someone with more experience? Did that person really ignore you because you're gay...or are they just deaf and didn't hear you? :)

If you become obsessed with your skin color, race, deafness, blindness or whatever it is, then you will be seeing the world through those glasses and every seeming slight, which may or may not have anything to do with that, you will interpret as discrimination and you'll end up bitter and angry at the world.
 
ChristineNeely said:
HAHAHA I get so paranoid when doors don't lock that someone is going to burst in on me after knocking and I miss it. When I use a bathroom that doesn't lock I intentionally cough every so often so people know it's occupied hahahaha

When I was a really really young kid (kindergarden?) I had a teacher who teased me after I used a bathroom attached to the classroom and would sing to myself.... and the whole class heard. Oops?
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LOL! I hate those non-locking doors! Hehe, no one ever taught me how to lock those doorknobs that you push in and turn to lock it. Had no idea that you could do that (who thinks to teach that to their child?) until my boss's son almost walked in on me once. Now every time HE uses that bathroom when I'm there he says, "I think I'll lock the door!" :D
 
ChristineNeely said:
HAHAHA I get so paranoid when doors don't lock that someone is going to burst in on me after knocking and I miss it. When I use a bathroom that doesn't lock I intentionally cough every so often so people know it's occupied hahahaha

When I was a really really young kid (kindergarden?) I had a teacher who teased me after I used a bathroom attached to the classroom and would sing to myself.... and the whole class heard. Oops?
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I hate when people knock and I can't answer back.

A perk to having no voice... nobody has heard my bathroom singing, no matter how poorly my memory of the word or how enthusiastically I sing it. :P
 
LadyAbigail said:
I love your comments, Christine! :) Something I have noticed is that a lot of times minority groups EXPECT to be victims and use their differences as a crutch or a reason for everything bad that happens to them. Did that person really glare at you because you're black or because you dress and act like a gang member? Did they really not hire you because they think you're disabled or did they just find someone with more experience? Did that person really ignore you because you're gay...or are they just deaf and didn't hear you? :)

If you become obsessed with your skin color, race, deafness, blindness or whatever it is, then you will be seeing the world through those glasses and every seeming slight, which may or may not have anything to do with that, you will interpret as discrimination and you'll end up bitter and angry at the world.
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Oh good grief! :mad2:

I wish you would experience being deaf for a five year period and see what you think then,

Although late deafened isn't the same, you might still get a little inkling of what it is like.
 
LadyAbigail said:
I love your comments, Christine! :) Something I have noticed is that a lot of times minority groups EXPECT to be victims and use their differences as a crutch or a reason for everything bad that happens to them. Did that person really glare at you because you're black or because you dress and act like a gang member? Did they really not hire you because they think you're disabled or did they just find someone with more experience? Did that person really ignore you because you're gay...or are they just deaf and didn't hear you? :)

If you become obsessed with your skin color, race, deafness, blindness or whatever it is, then you will be seeing the world through those glasses and every seeming slight, which may or may not have anything to do with that, you will interpret as discrimination and you'll end up bitter and angry at the world.
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Exactly! It's such a pessimistic way to view things. I'd hate everyone lol
I had a class called "Mind Matter & God" in undergrad and one of the final papers was a 15 page paper and you got to pick the topic. I picked the topic "Does freedom of choice exist?" - I argued that there is no such thing as freedom of choice because everything comes back to an experience you had way long ago that made you act one way or choose something. Like if you're getting ready for a sultry date you might pick a dress you had gotten a compliment on in the past.... or you pick a meal because the alternative had been less enjoyable because the last time you ate it you were fighting with your friend or something. Every decision is based on past experiences.

So if you think that you don't get a job because of your hearing problems and you start to hate your hearing problems it's this crazy vicious cycle because thinking its about you and your disability (if you define yourself by it to knock you down and find reason to fail I think its a disability - personal opinion of course) you enter your next interview with less confidence. Of course if you think you're not worthy and you're hesitant and you haven't already figured out ways to confidently get the job you're going to look like a weak hire.
 
ChristineNeely said:
My opinion is that if someone can hear an anti-deaf comment and they respond by using a snarky comment or act negatively it's only going to continue a nasty cycle of anti-deaf bashing. Nice responses beget nicer stereotyping down the road.
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That is why I try to answer politely - even if I'm really ticked off.
I don't want my attitude to worsen somebody's sterotypical view of somebody else.
 
Bottesini said:
Oh good grief! :mad2:

I wish you would experience being deaf for a five year period and see what you think then,

Although late deafened isn't the same, you might still get a little inkling of what it is like.
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No, late-deafened isn't the same.... but I still sign in public and I still have to ask people to repeat and many other things that you also experience. If someone was observing me in public there's nothing telling them that I didn't experience deafness at birth. To an observer who doesn't know us, we're very similar.

I didn't experience bullying in grade school from kids who didn't get it and I had a different experience being raised. So yea, I might not have a similar gut instinct about why people stare at me when I sign or a similar reaction when people are staring. We're different, but no one knows that by looking at us on the street.

I know a girl who is half blind and her face is different looking compared with other people. When we were out she thought someone was looking at her because of her face and how it looked..... after a few minutes they introduced themselves and they were staring at her tattoo, and wondered who had done it. If someone gives you a funny look you have NO idea what they're thinking. And along the same lines you have no idea why you're not a good hire or why someone gives you the cold shoulder or doesn't want to try to talk to you or date you. Any number of situations - you can't know what they're thinking.
 
ChristineNeely said:
people stare at me when I sign or a similar reaction when people are staring.
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When I'm signing with someone and people are staring, I'll look at the staring people and sign with a smile "Hi! How are you?".
Most of the time, they stop staring. :D
 
Bottesini said:
Oh good grief! :mad2:

I wish you would experience being deaf for a five year period and see what you think then,

Although late deafened isn't the same, you might still get a little inkling of what it is like.
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I know the woman think she is an expert about all minorities just by losing her hearing . I knew a lot of minorities living in Boston and in Berkeley and my friends did not feel that they where victims .
 
whatdidyousay! said:
I know the woman think she is an expert about all minorities just by losing her hearing . I knew a lot of minorities living in Boston and in Berkeley and my friends did not feel that they where victims .
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Clarify please? Are you referring to an event in Boston and Berkeley?
And if you're talking in the third person about me thinking I'm an expert about all minorities I totally apologize if I came off that way... I love studying people, literally. My undergrad was in social psychology with courses dedicated on stereotyping and human interaction - this post and topic is definitely the sort of topic I love thinking about. I'm a complete bookworm and anything that comes out of my mouth or gets put into my posts is usually part personal experience, part bookworm, and part analyzing and conversation :) I never mean to be offensive.
 
ChristineNeely said:
Exactly! It's such a pessimistic way to view things. I'd hate everyone lol
I had a class called "Mind Matter & God" in undergrad and one of the final papers was a 15 page paper and you got to pick the topic. I picked the topic "Does freedom of choice exist?" - I argued that there is no such thing as freedom of choice because everything comes back to an experience you had way long ago that made you act one way or choose something. Like if you're getting ready for a sultry date you might pick a dress you had gotten a compliment on in the past.... or you pick a meal because the alternative had been less enjoyable because the last time you ate it you were fighting with your friend or something. Every decision is based on past experiences.

So if you think that you don't get a job because of your hearing problems and you start to hate your hearing problems it's this crazy vicious cycle because thinking its about you and your disability (if you define yourself by it to knock you down and find reason to fail I think its a disability - personal opinion of course) you enter your next interview with less confidence. Of course if you think you're not worthy and you're hesitant and you haven't already figured out ways to confidently get the job you're going to look like a weak hire.
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My post was not about you . So I have nothing to explain to you.
 
CuriouslyMute said:
I hate when people knock and I can't answer back.

A perk to having no voice... nobody has heard my bathroom singing, no matter how poorly my memory of the word or how enthusiastically I sing it. :P
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Maybe you could carry some rocks with you and when a person knock on the door throw a rock at the door. That should tell them someone is using the bathroom. I hate it when someone try to break the door down , I had women trying to force their way when the door is lock. And sometime there sign on the lock saying it's occupied .
 
whatdidyousay! said:
Maybe you could carry some rocks with you and when a person knock on the door throw a rock at the door. That should tell them someone is using the bathroom. I hate it when someone try to break the door down , I had women trying to force their way when the door is lock. And sometime there sign on the lock saying it's occupied .
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HAHA imagine the muscles you'd get carrying your rocks in your purse for when you have to go to the bathroom.....
 
whatdidyousay! said:
Maybe you could carry some rocks with you and when a person knock on the door throw a rock at the door. That should tell them someone is using the bathroom. I hate it when someone try to break the door down , I had women trying to force their way when the door is lock. And sometime there sign on the lock saying it's occupied .
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Can I just throw the rocks directly at the stupid people? :giggle:
 
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