Is this cheating?

whoever says I was forcing? I was just trying to get people understand some people
 
Lighthouse77 said:
I think that's the whole purpose of this thread.. Should a person move on with their life because emotional cheating or not? And how can one tell someone is not into him/her?
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WHAT???? How can you ask that question without giving more information as to what really happened. Why not start by reading my recent post and answer the questions so we can give you our diverse opinion about what you or your friend should do next (like this place is a good place to find some answers).

:roll:
 
DoDaDew said:
WHAT???? How can you ask that question without giving more information as to what really happened. Why not start by reading my recent post and answer the questions so we can give you our diverse opinion about what you or your friend should do next (like this place is a good place to find some answers).

:roll:
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actually, she was asking if this is emotional cheating... she wanted to know how we feel about it. no different than asking if we think cybersex is cheating.
 
Lighthouse77 said:
actually, she was asking if this is emotional cheating... she wanted to know how we feel about it. no different than asking if we think cybersex is cheating.
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cybersex is easy to answer while you are married or in a relationship. But asking us if it is emotionally cheating when a girlfriend saw her boyfiend in a picture with a female. You did not explain what was in the picture....

What were the boyfriend and female doing in the picture?

My questions in the first post were valid and you appears not wanting to answer them.

You want my honest opinion? The girlfriend and boyfriend were having arguments. The boyfriend told his girlfriend he is going to a concert with his friends who is a couple. He more likely did not know that the female was invited. Someone took a picture of them all together. The girlfriend saw a new female in the picture and got jealous. Accused him of things he did not do and was just innocently going to the concert with his friends who is a couple.

There is no physical cheating and no emotional cheating. The girlfriend overreacted and got jealous. End of story!

That is my final answer, unless you are willing to explain the whole story. :roll:
 
DoDaDew said:
WHAT???? How can you ask that question without giving more information as to what really happened. Why not start by reading my recent post and answer the questions so we can give you our diverse opinion about what you or your friend should do next (like this place is a good place to find some answers).

:roll:
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oh and another thing, that post was to reply to shel. Reba explain about emotional cheating. Shel says then it is not meant to be, and I'm trying to say, if there no physical cheating, then how do we know some relationship is not meant to be and it is time to move on? then that's why we ask if this emotional cheating? or does cheating always have to be a physical thing.

But I think it is more about two people not able to communicate with each other rather it is due to personality differences, trust, not wanting to settle down with certain girl because she isn't the right one even though he keep hanging on to her for no reasons, etc.

one guy I went out with had cybersex... and he also had another girl who he talked to on the phone ALL the time. I felt neglected by him. as if he rather talk to her than me. Call it jealousy, but sitting there watching your boyfriend doing that was not an easy feeling. He says they are just friend.. and I do believe they were just friend. I didn't care about her. I cared about our relationship.
 
DoDaDew said:
cybersex is easy to answer while you are married or in a relationship. But asking us if it is emotionally cheating when a girlfriend saw her boyfiend in a picture with a female. You did not explain what was in the picture....

What were the boyfriend and female doing in the picture?

My questions in the first post were valid and you appears not wanting to answer them.

You want my honest opinion? The girlfriend and boyfriend were having arguments. The boyfriend told his girlfriend he is going to a concert with his friends who is a couple. He more likely did not know that the female was invited. Someone took a picture of them all together. The girlfriend saw a new female in the picture and got jealous. Accused him of things he did not do and was just innocently going to the concert with his friends who is a couple.

There is no physical cheating and no emotional cheating. The girlfriend overreacted and got jealous. End of story!

That is my final answer, unless you are willing to explain the whole story. :roll:
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it's a common that people go double date when they go out with a couple... because the couple will be too busy talking to each other, so an extra friend is usually brought along to keep the other person company. I think he did not tell her about the concert at all.
 
Again it is not something we can assume.


Reason?

We only got one side of the story.


I am really curious of "his" side of the story

Can make accusations all day long!

In all honestly. I do not know what is going on.
The only thing we have is. "she said" have yet to hear what "he said".
 
Mmmmmaybe she is extra paranoid because she is cheating on him... with his shifty-eyed father that has a giant mole on the cheek!! Gasp (cues soap opera music) yeah, due to insufficient details our imagination is merely left to run rabid :B
 
jinxedkitten said:
Mmmmmaybe she is extra paranoid because she is cheating on him... with his shifty-eyed father that has a giant mole on the cheek!! Gasp (cues soap opera music) yeah, due to insufficient details our imagination is merely left to run rabid :B
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LOL, actually people really do that...
 
Well IMO once you get past a certain age(about 22), people should be allowed to date whoever they want until they get something official (engagement)
 
Maybe my BF and I are different. I most of my friends are guys...and my best friend is actually an ex bf! My BF has all girls as friends. I am not jealous at all.
Now on another point, my ex husband did emotionally cheat on me. Then had the nerve to accuse me of having an affair on him with his friend when I left him. Which had nothing to do with his cheating.
*shrugs*
 
Yes and no.

Physically cheating? Probably not. If he was doing it as friends, then that's not physically cheating. There's nothing wrong with going out with friends. I have a girlfriend, but I also have female friends.

Mentally cheating? Likely. If he was planning on telling her some day, then fine. If he wasn't planning on telling her, then he probably should have.

However, we can't expect him to tell her every single thing he does. If he was expected to tell her every single thing he did, then that's like she's got total control over their relationship.

Sure, communication is important... but there's also such thing as too much communication where one tells another EVERYTHING. Doing that can get a bit tiresome.

Did they talk about it? Can't really give advice when you don't know if they talked it out or not.
 
I think the only thing that was wrong is that this photo made it's way onto a social site. BUT nowhere in the OP does it say its a social dating site.
 
Wirelessly posted (Sidekick LX: Mozilla/5.0 (Danger hiptop 4.6; U; rv:1.7.12) Gecko/20050920)

No. I don't consider it is cheating.

I think any boyfriend should have fun time and that's all.

Well, I had a boyfriend once, so.. usually, he goes to somewhere else that I don't interest/like to visit. He can go somewhere without me. That's fine with me, as long as he don't invovle a such stupid thing. :) Usually, he told me a few days or weeks after he visited some place with his friends. It didn't bother me.

But it would be nice if he invites me to my favorite place if he wants to go there. :D Otherwise, I will be disappointed if he goes to there and doesn't tell me anything. :squirt: I wanna go to my favorite places!! :D
 
DoDaDew said:
WOW!!! Some of you are too quick to make a judgment based on insufficient information. There is not enough information to draw a conclusion. Some of you are making assumptions. I questions how you support such positions you took with so little information presented. Based on the limited information, there are more questions than answers......

Does the boyfriend know the female?
Did the boyfriend know that the female was coming?
Was this a "blind date" arranged by the couple?
Did the couple invite their own friends (the husband invited his male friend and the wife invited her female friend)?

All we know is that they all went to concert together. The boyfriend may not know who the female friend is and may not know that she was invited.

Did the boyfriend told his girlfriend that he is going to a concert?
Did the boyfriend say who he was going with?
Why would he mention about the female if he doesn't know she was invited or didn't know her personally?
Did the boyfriend not want the girlfriend to go to the concert?
Was the girlfriend busy that she could not go to the concert?
Did they have an extra ticket because the girlfriend could not go?

I would assume that the boyfriend told his girlfriend that he went to a concert with the couple otherwise his disappearance would be questionable and it is a common courtesy to communicate to your significant others about your whereabouts.

What did she saw in the picture?
Was it a group picture (boyfriend standing next to husband and female standing next to wife)?
Was it a picture of the boyfriend and the female friend?
Did the picture show anything obvious between the boyfriend and the female friend such as holding hands, hugging, arms around waists and so forth)?

I would assume that the girlfriend saw another female in the picture with him and the couple and did not like the idea that there was another female in the group.

Did she ask the boyfriend about who the female was in the picture or did she react quickly and called the boyfriend a cheater?
When the girlfriend asked, did the boyfriend tried to cover it up? If he covered it up about the female then something might be going on between those two and that might be cheating. If he was honest and say, "oh that is jane doe" and explained who she is and why she was there (such as a friend of the wife) then, No, he was not cheating.

Since additional information was provided later on....they are having some issues. This could be a classic case of insecurity and trust issues in the relationship.

More information would be helpful!
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:gpost::gpost::gpost:




Reba said:
Emotional cheating is very real. It doesn't have to be a physical act to be unfaithful. In fact, many cases of infidelity start out as an emotional connection then evolve into a physical relationship. Whether it's emotional, physical or both, known or unknown, it's destructive to a marriage.
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Interesting. I have a friend who believes infidelity begins with talk, conversation -- So the minute you see a man talking to your woman you need to knock him down and do it quick. He has lived up to his word several times.

So I make it a point to flirt with his women, especially when he is around to see if he will try to knock me down -- But he hasn't and he told people he won't cuz I'm just being an ass.




souggy said:
When you start replacing your wife with someone else for romantic interactions aka going to the theatre, having lunch and so on. A lot of people do it without realizing it, then fall out of love with their spouse and end up dating the other person when divorce is filed. No sex or physical intimate contact is required.
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Maybe it is just my age but I don't think of movies or lunch as romantic. Especially movies: there are some my wife just won't go see: But then again at my age there are daughters and grand daughters to go with.
 
Wirelessly posted (Mozilla/5.0 (compatible; Teleca Q7; Brew 3.1.5; U; en) 320X240 LGE VX9200)

yes this is cheating by omission.
 
For those who said it was cheating by omission. Please justify that and how do you know it is an omission when the OP did not provide enough information?

Did the boyfriend not tell the girlfriend he is going to the concert?
Did the boyfriend tell the girlfriend he is going to the concert but not who he is going with?
Did the boyfriend tell the girlfriend he is going to the concert with the couple but not about the female?
Did the boyfriend actually know the femaile in question?

I really do not see how you can make judgements without more facts.
 
Driving Miss Daisy said:
The boyfriend went out with a couple and their female friend to a concert.
The boyfriend never told his girlfriend about it. Three weeks later, his girlfriend found out by some social website, saw a picture of them from a concert.

Is this mentally or emotionally cheating?
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I went back to the orginal post and I noticed this...

The boyfriend went out with a couple and THEIR female friend so how is it cheating if the female friend is a friend of the couple?
 
DoDaDew said:
For those who said it was cheating by omission. Please justify that and how do you know it is an omission when the OP did not provide enough information?

Did the boyfriend not tell the girlfriend he is going to the concert?
Did the boyfriend tell the girlfriend he is going to the concert but not who he is going with?
Did the boyfriend tell the girlfriend he is going to the concert with the couple but not about the female?
Did the boyfriend actually know the femaile in question?

I really do not see how you can make judgements without more facts.
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I definitely don't think this is cheating. Well, at least there is no proof of cheating. I said lying by omission, but I was one of the people who assumed that she knew nothing. I don't think you need to tell your partner everything, but I have found that when things like that get left out, there is a reason.
 
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