Invite Self Over

jillio said:
Agreed.
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Here's a story for you...

A while ago, this man who is in his 40s has a decent job. He lives with his parents. he has been planning to buy a house for years. To myself, I thought... that's a good thing he's finally moving on.

Then... I was told that he plans to buy a house, then have his parents sell theirs and move in with him. Then that was when I realized, is he doing this to avoid paying inheritance taxes?

I had to bite my tongue.
 
EQL, now that you have seen posts suggesting your friend is a social cripple and all that, let me ask you if you know her well enough to apply that to her vs, say, her being very lonely, maybe even not knowing/forgetting it was Thanksgiving Day, etc....? Again, how well do you know this person? How well do you understand each other, communication-wise (oral, ASL, etc)?
 
Tousi said:
EQL, now that you have seen posts suggesting your friend is a social cripple and all that, let me ask you if you know her well enough to apply that to her vs, say, her being very lonely, maybe even not knowing/forgetting it was Thanksgiving Day, etc....? Again, how well do you know this person? How well do you understand each other, communication-wise (oral, ASL, etc)?
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It wasn't suggested that her friend was a social cripple. That was in reference to a generalized group of people suffering from social ineptness. :roll: Not enough is known regarding the level of social delay experienced by the OP's friend to make such an assumption.

BTW, it was suggested that the OP use this situation to educate her friend regarding appropriate behavior.
 
Banjo said:
Here's a story for you...

A while ago, this man who is in his 40s has a decent job. He lives with his parents. he has been planning to buy a house for years. To myself, I thought... that's a good thing he's finally moving on.

Then... I was told that he plans to buy a house, then have his parents sell theirs and move in with him. Then that was when I realized, is he doing this to avoid paying inheritance taxes?

I had to bite my tongue.
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Quite possible.
 
Banjo said:
I think it's quite disturbing that one would wait for the parents to kneel over and die in order to receive financial security.
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You would be surprised how many do that...deaf and hearing. I hear people say all the time..."Well, when my dad dies, I will get....."
 
Banjo said:
Here's a story for you...

A while ago, this man who is in his 40s has a decent job. He lives with his parents. he has been planning to buy a house for years. To myself, I thought... that's a good thing he's finally moving on.

Then... I was told that he plans to buy a house, then have his parents sell theirs and move in with him. Then that was when I realized, is he doing this to avoid paying inheritance taxes?

I had to bite my tongue.
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isn't that being smart with money?
 
jillio said:
You would be surprised how many do that...deaf and hearing. I hear people say all the time..."Well, when my dad dies, I will get....."
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It's rather sad because one would have to waste a significant amount of its life to receive something. They should be doing something worthwhile with the time they have.
 
Banjo said:
and living with their parents. Don't get me wrong, there is nothing wrong with it. However, to spend your entire life living with your parents, it's not a good way to become independent and self-reliant.

It's not the same as having your parents live with you later when they get older. There is a big difference. People who live a sheltered life often are unable to understand how the real world works.
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is that how it is for ya'all?

Asian culture... so much simpler. It's more of community mindset than individualism.
 
jillio said:
You would be surprised how many do that...deaf and hearing. I hear people say all the time..."Well, when my dad dies, I will get....."
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Geez.

I am not looking forward to when my parents pass away... especially if I have to take care of loose ends from their indebted lives.
 
No, it is not just the deaf culture. Hearing people do it too. Especially when they think they are close friends with you Especially Thanksgiving (weird but true... it's like a holiday similar to NEW YEAR EVE like is a time for friends and family get together and celebrate).

Just say you can't bring her because you are not sure how your family feel about it.
 
Banjo said:
It's rather sad because one would have to waste a significant amount of its life to receive something. They should be doing something worthwhile with the time they have.
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Yep. Always playing the waiting game.
 
Jiro said:
is that how it is for ya'all?

Asian culture... so much simpler. It's more of community mindset than individualism.
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Yes. We could do with a bit more collective cultural practice in this country.
 
Jiro said:
is that how it is for ya'all?

Asian culture... so much simpler. It's more of community mindset than individualism.
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Right...

Us Mennonites may be communal, but we still have a sense of individualism. You live with your parents until you own a property of your own, then you work and share everything with your parents, then when it's time for them to retire... they live with you. I think that's what banjo was referring to, the Canadian sense of individualism and communalism, which is not the same as the American lifestyle.
 
souggy said:
Right...

Us Mennonites may be communal, but we still have a sense of individualism. You live with your parents until you own a property of your own, then you work and share everything with your parents, then when it's time for them to retire... they live with you. I think that's what banjo was referring to, the Canadian sense of individualism and communalism, which is not the same as the American lifestyle.
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Right. Very different.
 
souggy said:
Right...

Us Mennonites may be communal, but we still have a sense of individualism. You live with your parents until you own a property of your own, then you work and share everything with your parents, then when it's time for them to retire... they live with you. I think that's what banjo was referring to, the Canadian sense of individualism and communalism, which is not the same as the American lifestyle.
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Are you a mennonites? you wrote "Us Mennonites"
 
deafgal001 said:
Are you a mennonites? you wrote "Us Mennonites"
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Ethnically, linguistically and culturally, yes. Religiously? No, I am a atheist with a rather unique spirituality (thanks to being infused with Inuit and First Nations mythologies.) However it seems like everyone in Canada has a Russian grandmother, or a Mennonite grandfather or a Ukrainian uncle or a Polish aunt, which their cultural values shaped Canada the way it is today-- the supposed peace-loving/making open-minded stereotypes that the world display us as.

Before the Cold War, Canada was very British, and very hawk-like in their mindsets with American-like individualism, however for some reason Canadian culture took a complete 180 degrees turn after WWII.
 
souggy said:
Right...

Us Mennonites may be communal, but we still have a sense of individualism. You live with your parents until you own a property of your own, then you work and share everything with your parents, then when it's time for them to retire... they live with you. I think that's what banjo was referring to, the Canadian sense of individualism and communalism, which is not the same as the American lifestyle.
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Exactly.
 
deafgal001 said:
No, it is not just the deaf culture. Hearing people do it too. Especially when they think they are close friends with you Especially Thanksgiving (weird but true... it's like a holiday similar to NEW YEAR EVE like is a time for friends and family get together and celebrate).

Just say you can't bring her because you are not sure how your family feel about it.
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Thank god!! :giggle:
 
Banjo said:
I think it's quite disturbing that one would wait for the parents to kneel over and die in order to receive financial security.
Click to expand...

jillio said:
You would be surprised how many do that...deaf and hearing. I hear people say all the time..."Well, when my dad dies, I will get....."
Click to expand...

I've heard that before too. I once knew someone who was always saying "I can't wait !!" (when talking about his parents eventual death.) I was like :eek3: Needless to say, I am not friends with him anymore. Not just because of that, but many other disturbing things he used to say.
 
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