Suicide, especially by people who don't have terminal diseases, causes a lot of trauma, pain, hardship and anguish for the family and friends they leave behind. It's terrible.
My analogy to Hochi some threads ago and here is it seems simple on the outside. You slant your arm and gently wham (oxymoron?) the stone into the water. It hits with a quiet blast and bounces repeatedly and the ripples go on further and further out. I felt affected by his horrible story and felt truly sad and it stirred up my own recent past. I felt as you said and I didn't know the guy who hung himself.
The problem becomes what one of Grummer's links had in it against physician-assisted suicide. My problem with that one article was the focus was on the end of life not while the person is living w/out a terminal illness (if anyone wants the article as a source, I will add it). So, it didn't have the credibility I needed.
If a person exists in mental anguish for year after year after year (I learned why after she died). You know they are given drugs to put a band aid on it. They may go to therapy for years. Do they work? Sometimes. Are the the drugs worth it with everything else they do to you. The side effects that can be deadly AND the side effects are quickly flashed on the tv screen to desensitize us to them - again, Parenti, "Inventing Reality." So the industry has us saying, "Oh ALLL drugs have side effects." Yes, and we can minimize them or not take the drug and that is happening with me more and more. It isn't worth what it can do to me and to friends more often than not - pharms a big industry.
Therapy has become really weird/different. Therapists come up with new therapies du jour and they keep changing - to make a living (saw it in the computer field) or to help people? Probably both. "I'm glad you're here so I can hopefully pay off my house before I retire." I've seen therapists nod off while the patient was talking. I believe the intent is true for many in the field but there is no magic solution. Therein lies one of the problems.
We now we see those people living in horrible situations who need to be helped but they often aren't. See Hochi's example exponentially w/out my getting into details and I can refer to my stepmother who slowly and painfully died by 61 where she took steps to cause this (perhaps unconsciously but she was smart so probably very well aware of what she was doing).
I know what happens to those who remain within my own experience and from others but I am no expert. Reba, I see your pain ring out. But what about the person living in a nightmare ... Lastly, when my mom was dying of lung cancer and said, "I'm lost in the woods and can't get out. Help!!!" What would I have done if she said that during her life at a much younger age. Therapy? Lets say she was going. Drugs, to make her or others catatonic ... I've seen that. I don't have the answers. Can I say there is no quality of life? I was in a nursing home where a lady had had a stroke. She was darn catatonic. But Marcus and I persisted and I remember the first time she reached out and petted him. It was a m a z i n g . We persisted and she would be more alert now and then. But it doesn't happen with everyone.
I think I can end this by saying safely
that while I'm not religious, it does have its purpose in life. It provides hope. It provides meaning. It provides life. I believe that captures the end of a final paper I wrote in 11th grade on Darwin. I believe in the purpose of religion. But not everyone believes. We're stuck again.
Thanks for your input as always, Reba. I agree with you. But the one thing that's missing is what about the person living in that nightmare and stuck. Your focus is on the ripples caused by if they commit suicide or in this discussion are allowed to. I don't always see an answer to their problems, so their nightmare continues but ours don't.
In peace.