Guests breaking furniture

[shel90]

Recently, my roommate started dating this lady who is over 300 lbs. She comes over almost every weekend which is not a problem. She is really nice and very respectful. However, she likes to sit on my office chair. I didn't think too much of it.

Yesterday, I was struggling to get my office chair to stay up so I could type on my computer. It would go up but as soon as I sat on it, it would go all the way down. I told my husband about it and he said that my roommate's girlfriend broke it the other day. geeez....we found it on Craigslist for free and it was brand new so it is not like we spent a lot of money on it.

So, last night I searched CL for another one but of course, I wouldn't have the same luck as I did so I just ordered a new one from Amazon.com for $55. Not bad and I hope it is comfortable.

However, the question is that I don't want her sitting on the new office chair for fear of her breaking it. Is it rude for me to ban guests to sit on my office chair? If they happen to sit on it and break it, is it rude to ask them to pay for it?

Thoughts?

 

[Frisky Feline]

That is a difficult situation. I have no clue but knowing myself. Anyone who comes, and i hid the favorite chair. or move over in the corner. If someone takes the chair, just let them know, not to take this one. use other chairs with distracting talking? im sorry about what happened to your chair. Surprised that you didnt know, because you were not home at this time? your roommate could have said something to you and discuss about it. If i m your roomie then i will let you know right away and feel awful about the chair. I would have to pay you some for it because this chair is not mine.

 

[shel90]

My husband was there and saw the whole thing and didn't say anything. I feel funny making my roommate pay for it if I got the chair for free from CL?

 

[Frisky Feline]

I would let it go. It would put you both in an awkard situation about money. It appears to me that you guys have not discuss about the rules if anyone live with you and expect to follow. such as, if anyone can use my stuffs, if broke then let me know blah blah you know ? If it is the secnd time then OF COURSE to make the roommate to pay for it. eh

 

[Reba]

Some ideas (no guarantees):

As soon as she gets there, usher her to a sturdy, comfy chair that you have designated for her. Make sure it's in a convenient spot where she won't feel isolate. Also, steer other visitors to their chairs too, so she won't feel picked on.

Don't make your office chair or any other less sturdy chairs available. Have them tucked away or have someone already sitting in them when she arrives. (Maybe use your kids for placeholders until the other guests arrive).

I don't think you can ask them to pay for it you allowed them to sit there. Now, if they sat there against your request not to, that's different. However, any guest worthy of visiting your home should offer to pay for damages immediately without any requests or even hints from you. That's what a gracious guest does. The gracious host politely turns down the offer. (If the guest insists, and seems to feel really bad about it, graciously accept payment.)

It's not rude to steer people away from your favorite chair as long as you have a comfortable option available.

IMO

 

[Reba]

My husband was there and saw the whole thing and didn't say anything. I feel funny making my roommate pay for it if I got the chair for free from CL?

The original chair was free but the replacement was not.

 

[shel90]

Some ideas (no guarantees):

As soon as she gets there, usher her to a sturdy, comfy chair that you have designated for her. Make sure it's in a convenient spot where she won't feel isolate. Also, steer other visitors to their chairs too, so she won't feel picked on.

Don't make your office chair or any other less sturdy chairs available. Have them tucked away or have someone already sitting in them when she arrives. (Maybe use your kids for placeholders until the other guests arrive).

I don't think you can ask them to pay for it you allowed them to sit there. Now, if they sat there against your request not to, that's different. However, any guest worthy of visiting your home should offer to pay for damages immediately without any requests or even hints from you. That's what a gracious guest does. The gracious host politely turns down the offer. (If the guest insists, and seems to feel really bad about it, graciously accept payment.)

It's not rude to steer people away from your favorite chair as long as you have a comfortable option available.

IMO

Yea, just a pain in the butt to have to remember to hide my chair each time I don't use it. I am thinking of moving the computer into my bedroom so I wont have to worry about it but my bedroom isn't big enough to fit the desk and chair. Hmmm...

I don't know if my roommate is aware of it as my husband was all, "So what? Things break all the time." I have a feeling he didn't tell her. However, I will casually bring it up with her saying something about having to order a new chair since her girlfriend broke it. Then, see what my roommate says.

Lately, things around here have been breaking and I am getting sick of it. My husband's attitude is about it is "things break all the time". It makes me furious with that attitude but I cant change it so I am not going to deal it with him.

 

[LoveBlue]

Lately, things around here have been breaking and I am getting sick of it. My husband's attitude is about it is "things break all the time". It makes me furious with that attitude but I cant change it so I am not going to deal it with him.

Just whack him in the nose, and if you break it, just say "things break all the time".

 

[shel90]

Just whack him in the nose, and if you break it, just say "things break all the time".

I just hope something of his that he values breaks and I can give him the same attitude back.

We got a new shed in the backyard 5 years ago and within a year, it was damaged from the blizzards and now it looks like crap. My husband was like "So what...it still stores stuff". It looks AWFUL.

Same thing with other things breaking in the house and he fixes them up with other materials and then the items look crappy. Then my house starts looking crappy. So frustrating.

 

[Reba]

Yea, just a pain in the butt to have to remember to hide my chair each time I don't use it. I am thinking of moving the computer into my bedroom so I wont have to worry about it but my bedroom isn't big enough to fit the desk and chair. Hmmm...

I don't know if my roommate is aware of it as my husband was all, "So what? Things break all the time." I have a feeling he didn't tell her. However, I will casually bring it up with her saying something about having to order a new chair since her girlfriend broke it. Then, see what my roommate says.

Lately, things around here have been breaking and I am getting sick of it. My husband's attitude is about it is "things break all the time". It makes me furious with that attitude but I cant change it so I am not going to deal it with him.

Maybe this roommate needs the rules of the house explained. It might be a good time for a calm sit-down around the table to go over house rules.

 

[Reba]

...Same thing with other things breaking in the house and he fixes them up with other materials and then the items look crappy. Then my house starts looking crappy. So frustrating.

Uh, oh, redneck duct-tape refurbishing.

 

[shel90]

Maybe this roommate needs the rules of the house explained. It might be a good time for a calm sit-down around the table to go over house rules.

So, it wouldn't be rude of me to tell my roommate that her girlfriend is not allowed to sit on my new chair?

 

[Reba]

So, it wouldn't be rude of me to tell my roommate that her girlfriend is not allowed to sit on my new chair?

It's your house, you can set the rules.

A roommate is not the same as a guest. Different rules for roommates and guests. However, as a roommate, she's responsible for the actions of her guests. If she lets the roommate sit in the chair and it breaks, then the roommate pays replacement cost. That puts the ball in roommate's court. That is, roommate can decide how to handle the guest seating because roommate will pay for any damages that happen.

Sample rule:

Roommate is financially responsible for any damages caused by roommate's guests. The costs of these damages will be determined by the owners.


Put all the rules on paper. Have everyone read and sign the paper, then make copies.

It should clear up any vagueness about things.

 

[green427]

Awkward situation, yes....

300lbs is much more than most furniture is designed to hold.

I've been in a similar situation....and came up with a good excuse....I would tell the heavy guest that there is something wrong with a piece of furniture, and NO ONE is allowed to sit in it, not even any kids...this way, the heavy guest will not feel like she is 'singled out'.

We had some friends awhile back, he weighed 400lbs, she was close to 300. They bought new furniture every other year, had no choice. Of course they blamed the furniture on shoddy quality.

 

[shel90]

It's your house, you can set the rules.

A roommate is not the same as a guest. Different rules for roommates and guests. However, as a roommate, she's responsible for the actions of her guests. If she lets the roommate sit in the chair and it breaks, then the roommate pays replacement cost. That puts the ball in roommate's court. That is, roommate can decide how to handle the guest seating because roommate will pay for any damages that happen.

Sample rule:

Roommate is financially responsible for any damages caused by roommate's guests. The costs of these damages will be determined by the owners.


Put all the rules on paper. Have everyone read and sign the paper, then make copies.

It should clear up any vagueness about things.

Wow, she has been living here for a year and half and that would be awkward to set this up. HMm...

I will mention about her girlfriend breaking my chair and that I had to purchase a new one to see what she says. If she says nothing, then I will tell her that if she breaks any more furniture, I would expect her to pay for it.

 

[shel90]

Awkward situation, yes....

300lbs is much more than most furniture is designed to hold.

I've been in a similar situation....and came up with a good excuse....I would tell the heavy guest that there is something wrong with a piece of furniture, and NO ONE is allowed to sit in it, not even any kids...this way, the heavy guest will not feel like she is 'singled out'.

We had some friends awhile back, he weighed 400lbs, she was close to 300. They bought new furniture every other year, had no choice. Of course they blamed the furniture on shoddy quality.

I have never been morbidly obese but wouldn't it be the obese person's responsibility to be careful about what furniture to sit on?

 

[Lau2046]

We cleaned a house once (not after this situation, thank God) the woman mentioned that she had a guest to her home that was so overweight, she broke the toilet using it. I'm not sure how to handle asking for payment, but pay for the toilet, absolutely. Other furniture, I don't know. I would offer her a seat and explain that she needs to use that because the other furniture won't support her weight....

Laura

 

[Reba]

Wow, she has been living here for a year and half and that would be awkward to set this up. HMm...

I will mention about her girlfriend breaking my chair and that I had to purchase a new one to see what she says. If she says nothing, then I will tell her that if she breaks any more furniture, I would expect her to pay for it.

Does the roommate pay rent? Normally this kind of contract would be set up as part of the original agreement to move in. It really helps to avoid any misunderstandings. That way, there's no awkwardness.

 

[Reba]

I have never been morbidly obese but wouldn't it be the obese person's responsibility to be careful about what furniture to sit on?

You would think so. You would think that a person wouldn't want to take the chance of falling down on a piece of furniture.

 

[dereksbicycles]

What makes office chairs so special? If I were to visit, I would rather sit in a sofa or couch over office chair. ALWAYS!!!

I'm sure there is couch or sofa available for guests. They would always sit in that.

Other idea-----no one uses your computer but you, right? If that chair was placed under desk by computer, no one would use it, or will they?

Now, I don't know if your roommate was on lease or not, but if this happens again, you can always kick her out. PRONTO!!