Do you think about your mortality?

jillio said:
Believe as you will. And I will believe as I will. And yes, you are indeed being snarky. As usual.
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Nope, not at all. Just asking a straight-forward question. I'll assume your answer is indeed the best you can do.
 
I am certain that my life matters, if only in a small way, to those I love.
 
I don't think about whether my life will make a difference later. I have too much living right now to break focus. :P
 
KristinaB said:
I don't really think about it much. Just enough that hubby and I have talked about what we want and things like that. I was always brought up to believe that once we are gone, there is no more suffering and no more pain. I can look forward to that, but quite frankly, even though I deal with so much pain right now, I am thankful that I have it and can be with the family.

Whatever will be, will be.
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That's pretty much the same view my GF has. I appreciate the fact that she can talk about this and in fact tried to do so last night after her grandfathers funeral at the graveyard. She asked me what kind of tombstone I liked best as we were still at the family graveyard. But I could not talk about it. It was a very private and intimate experience as we placed his urn in the ground ourselves. She took me around and introduced me to about 5 generations of her family. She showed me her uncle who died young, children that she never knew, grandparents of grandparents and where family lines merged and diverted. Even showed me where her plot is and that of the rest of her family that is still living. Her family has some of the healthiest views on death of any family I have ever met. I want her to take me back again sometime this summer when I can be more there with her than I was yesterday.
 
Reba said:
Everyone matters now.

Why on earth would you ask such a personally insulting question? Can't you ever leave anything alone?
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Can't you?

Anything to contribute to the thread?
 
Beowulf said:
I don't think about whether my life will make a difference later. I have too much living right now to break focus. :P
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Last week I probably would have said the same thing. Right now, I envy you.
 
I will tell you what I think:

I hope I will make some sort of positive impact. It might not be a big one. I might not even make an impact at all, but my end goal is I hope I have left people with good memories and helped people in some way along this journey we call 'life'.

At the same time there are things I want to accomplish before I die. I don't want to die just a 'chicken farmer that never quite got it right in life'. I want to be able to leave my DD some things such as being able to continue on in life in a positive way, meaning I want to leave her something meaningful. Something that will make her want to carry on.

What scares me the most? Having to leave my DD behind. At the same time, I also believe a parent should never have to bury their own child, but sadly it still happens due to circumstances beyond one's control such as a car wreck, freak accident, terminal illness, war, natural disasters, etc. I want my DD to out live me. Still, the thought of leaving her for eternity scares the crap out of me.

The things I want to do before I die are lengthy. I want to finish college, get a good job, fly in an airplane or helicopter, travel abroad, go see the sights that this world has to offer such as NYC, London, Sydney. There's also a road trip to visit the lower 48 and the chances to visit both Alaska and Hiwaii. I also want to go see the ocean which I have never seen in my life. I also want to pursue the American dream - own my own home, have a decent car, have a decent job, and have a family.

Will I get to do all these? Not likely at the rate I'm going. It's my belief that my eternity is secured in my faith. So with that taken care of, I just try to live in the here and the now and not worry too much about what I can't avoid.

Like most people, I hope I have peaceful death. I prefer to go in my sleep when I'm old, you know, go lay down for an afternoon nap and step into eternity.

That's just my thoughts on it.
 
That's pretty much the same view my GF has. I appreciate the fact that she can talk about this and in fact tried to do so last night after her grandfathers funeral at the graveyard. She asked me what kind of tombstone I liked best as we were still at the family graveyard. But I could not talk about it. It was a very private and intimate experience as we placed his urn in the ground ourselves. She took me around and introduced me to about 5 generations of her family. She showed me her uncle who died young, children that she never knew, grandparents of grandparents and where family lines merged and diverted. Even showed me where her plot is and that of the rest of her family that is still living. Her family has some of the healthiest views on death of any family I have ever met. I want her to take me back again sometime this summer when I can be more there with her than I was yesterday.
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That sounds like a nice moment.

It's getting increasingly rare for families to all live and die in the same spot, so I'm guessing that some of these family plots with many generations will get increasingly rare.

That said - on my maternal grandmother's side, we have a plot with both grandparents, my mom's first child (born alive, died a few hours later), my brother, my aunt, and my mom. My mom and brother were both cremated, so that left extra space. There is a plot for my still-living uncle. It is nice to see the family history there, even though that 3-generation space doesn't really go that far back.

My dad's family also has a multi-generational plot, and that tells quite the story of immigration, national service (dad served in WWII and his rank is on the tombstone), and family tradition.
 
Beach girl said:
That sounds like a nice moment.

It's getting increasingly rare for families to all live and die in the same spot, so I'm guessing that some of these family plots with many generations will get increasingly rare.

That said - on my maternal grandmother's side, we have a plot with both grandparents, my mom's first child (born alive, died a few hours later), my brother, my aunt, and my mom. My mom and brother were both cremated, so that left extra space. There is a plot for my still-living uncle. It is nice to see the family history there, even though that 3-generation space doesn't really go that far back.

My dad's family also has a multi-generational plot, and that tells quite the story of immigration, national service (dad served in WWII and his rank is on the tombstone), and family tradition.
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How about keeping the same plot and when a family member dies bury her/him in a coffin. The next one dies, have his/her body cremated and put the ashes on top or perhaps a few inches below ground and put the sod back on top. Repeat this with other family members. And just keep adding the names on a tombstone?
 
kokonut said:
How about keeping the same plot and when a family member dies bury her/him in a coffin. The next one dies, have his/her body cremated and put the ashes on top or perhaps a few inches below ground and put the sod back on top. Repeat this with other family members. And just keep adding the names on a tombstone?
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:hmm:...Ahhh...NO...don't wanna anybody on top of me!...Suppose you had to deal with a relative during ur life time (not getting along)...then having them on top of you when ur dead?.....:roll:

Which comes to mind:....when all my days are over....and my time has come to pass....I hope they bury me upside down....and the World can Kiss My Ass!
 
rockin'robin said:
:hmm:...Ahhh...NO...don't wanna anybody on top of me!...Suppose you had to deal with a relative during ur life time (not getting along)...then having them on top of you when ur dead?.....:roll:

Which comes to mind:....when all my days are over....and my time has come to pass....I hope they bury me upside down....and the World can Kiss My Ass!
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How about having grandma on your ring?
LifeGem - Memorial Diamonds created from a lock of hair or cremated remains / ashes / cremation
 
kokonut said:
How about keeping the same plot and when a family member dies bury her/him in a coffin. The next one dies, have his/her body cremated and put the ashes on top or perhaps a few inches below ground and put the sod back on top. Repeat this with other family members. And just keep adding the names on a tombstone?
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They do something like that in Brazil. It's called "renting" a burial space. (Many are above-ground, in masoleum-type structures.)

The first time I read about it, I thought my Portuguese was failing me, because surely no one would "rent" a burial space. But they do. When the body turns to bones and dust, it's out with the old, in with the new. So to speak. The bones are collected and burned or buried, and the most recent dead body takes its place, again renting the space for a few years before in turn, out they will go to make way for someone else.

Re: being buried on top of another person: also not unusual. They do that in the U.K. quite often. Not surprising, I guess, since it's a very small, densely populated island. My parents-in-law died within a few months of each other, with mom-in-law going first. She was buried normally. When dad-in-law died 3 months later, her coffin was removed, the grave further excavated, and she was re-buried deeper. A layer of soil was then put on it, and he was buried in the same plot, a foot or so above her coffin.

I was startled to learn that was how they did it, but it is indeed very common there, I've learned. That's how those smallish church graveyards can hold a lot more people than you would initially think.
 
Whatever you choose to do, Cheetah, I hope with time and closure you can go back to a peaceful mind state.
 
I do think about death from time to time. I do not stress out over it. I do stress more thinking about losing a love one.
 
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