Deaf Adoption: A Rhetorician's New Family

[jillio]

Somehow I get the feeling I won't hear from him. Insecurity?

Not at all. More like the security of knowing that it is not necessary for him to put himself on display and prove his accomplishments to those who doubt that, as a profoundly deaf individual, he is capable of functioning at the level he does.

 

[jillio]

No accusations... just two possibilities....
I hadn't ... I wish!

So, what's this researchproject you are starting in order to let your profoundly deaf son speak on the phone...???

Where did you get that? First of all, my research has nothing to do with speaking on the phone. And secondly, I don't "let" my son do anything. He is an adult. And thirdly, I don't feel the need to put my child on display to bolster my own ego, as do those who create blogs about their deaf children to attempt to show off their parenting skills for the recognition it brings them as a parent. I don't find it necessary to display my child to the public as a way of using that child to gain sympathy for the work I do as a parent of a deaf child. If you are so insecure that you find it necessary to have your ego stroked inthat way, cloggy, that is your issue to deal with.

 

[jillio]

Um, the referrence about my observations wasn't related to talking people on the phone. It was something else. I made that clear earlier.

I was talking about word discrimination and not sound perception per se. Again, are you denying that there is NO correlation on what you've just now described?

LoL.

And without sound perception, there is no word discrimination, so I see the realtionship between the two, but not a correlation.

 

[Cloggy]

...... And thirdly, I don't feel the need to put my child on display to bolster my own ego, as do those who create blogs about their deaf children to attempt to show off their parenting skills for the recognition it brings them as a parent. I don't find it necessary to display my child to the public as a way of using that child to gain sympathy for the work I do as a parent of a deaf child. If you are so insecure that you find it necessary to have your ego stroked inthat way, cloggy, that is your issue to deal with.

Ah, so that's how you look at it...

Yes, some people like to share information,
others look at it as "display ", "using that child to gain sympathy"

Good to get see how you cannot imagine someone would just want to share information....

You loss.

 

[jillio]

Ah, so that's how you look at it...

Yes, some people like to share information,
others look at it as "display ", "using that child to gain sympathy"

Good to get see how you cannot imagine someone would just want to share information....

You loss.

Ahh, there's the difference. You don't have to put video of your child on the net to share information. As a matter of fact, you can share information without ever mentioning your child.

 

[Cloggy]

Ahh, there's the difference. You don't have to put video of your child on the net to share information. As a matter of fact, you can share information without ever mentioning your child.

Very true.. That's also a possibility.
But then again, we both are proud of our children. There's nothing wrong with using them as examples... like you do, like I do..

So you think having video in the blog is too much...??

I though about posting a video where she speaks with her grandmother in Holland - on the phone...

Would that be too much for in your opinion. ??

 

[Drew's Dad]

...I don't feel the need to put my child on display to bolster my own ego, as do those who create blogs about their deaf children to attempt to show off their parenting skills for the recognition it brings them as a parent. I don't find it necessary to display my child to the public as a way of using that child to gain sympathy for the work I do as a parent of a deaf child. If you are so insecure that you find it necessary to have your ego stroked inthat way, cloggy, that is your issue to deal with.

Someone please help!

I'm feeling a bit down and insecure today and could use an ego boost, some recognition of my parenting skills and a dose of sympathy.

Please visit Drew's blog as quickly as possible!

 

[kokonut]

And without sound perception, there is no word discrimination, so I see the realtionship between the two, but not a correlation.

Er, I wasn't talking about between sound perception and word discrimination. Please show where I said that. You keep twisting my words. A correlation is a single number that describes the degree of relationship between two variables.

 

[kokonut]

Ah, so what we are really talking about here is anecdotal evidence, not correlation.

Er, no. Not entirely.

 

[kokonut]

Not at all. More like the security of knowing that it is not necessary for him to put himself on display and prove his accomplishments to those who doubt that, as a profoundly deaf individual, he is capable of functioning at the level he does.

I was right. Paranoid. Unfounded fears. As I said, a simple phone call. Nothing revealing or revelatory. You're expressing your fear, not his. Probably something has to do with The Post Onpost Interview earlier this year.

A simple phone call.

 

[shel90]

Curious....to those who put blogs and videos of their kids on the Internet..is it because they r deaf? Would u still create a blog about them if they had been hearing?

I have never thought of making a blog about my children's progress on the Internet until I came to this site.

Is that a new trend or it is cuz u want to show the world how great CIs are?

I guess I don't see what the big deal is since I grew up orally with a severe profound hearing loss so to me seeing deaf people develop oral skills, it is not a big deal but I guess for people who don't know about deafness see it as a big deal?

I always saw myself and my friends just normal people living lives like anyone else with just some accodommations..nothing exciting there. The media makes a big deal about writing stories about deaf people being able to play sports, deaf people being able to get jobs and so on. I guess it is a good thing to have the exposure but at the same time, to my friends, co workers and I, we don't get wowed by those stories cuz many of us r doing the same things too. If a deaf person became the US President...ohhh that wud be a HUGE deal!

We r people too and we have the same goals as most hearing people too which r find good jobs we love, family, friends, good health, and have our own homes.

 

[jillio]

Er, I wasn't talking about between sound perception and word discrimination. Please show where I said that. You keep twisting my words. A correlation is a single number that describes the degree of relationship between two variables.

Yes, that is what a correlation is. And that number cannot be arrived at without experimental design, control for extraneous variables, and statistical analysis. And you are the one that brought up word discrimination. Are you now saying that auditory word discrimination is possible without sound perception?

 

[jillio]

Er, no. Not entirely.

Well, it either has to be anecdotal evidence if it is based on your observation, or it has to have an experiemntal design. You say it isn't anecdote, and you say it is not research. So exactly what is it? You are drawing conclusions, and you are claiming correlation. As you claim to have arrived at that correlation without statistical analysis and design, and are basing the relationship you have observed based on various conversations, then it has to be anecdote.

 

[jillio]

Curious....to those who put blogs and videos of their kids on the Internet..is it because they r deaf? Would u still create a blog about them if they had been hearing?

I have never thought of making a blog about my children's progress on the Internet until I came to this site.

Is that a new trend or it is cuz u want to show the world how great CIs are?

I guess I don't see what the big deal is since I grew up orally with a severe profound hearing loss so to me seeing deaf people develop oral skills, it is not a big deal but I guess for people who don't know about deafness see it as a big deal?

I always saw myself and my friends just normal people living lives like anyone else with just some accodommations..nothing exciting there. The media makes a big deal about writing stories about deaf people being able to play sports, deaf people being able to get jobs and so on. I guess it is a good thing to have the exposure but at the same time, to my friends, co workers and I, we don't get wowed by those stories cuz many of us r doing the same things too. If a deaf person became the US President...ohhh that wud be a HUGE deal!

We r people too and we have the same goals as most hearing people too which r find good jobs we love, family, friends, good health, and have our own homes.

Oh, wow!:jaw: Look at that! A deaf personthat can play golf, have children, and live independently! And OMG! A deaf kid that can use their voice!

 

[kokonut]

Well, it either has to be anecdotal evidence if it is based on your observation, or it has to have an experiemntal design. You say it isn't anecdote, and you say it is not research. So exactly what is it? You are drawing conclusions, and you are claiming correlation. As you claim to have arrived at that correlation without statistical analysis and design, and are basing the relationship you have observed based on various conversations, then it has to be anecdote.

Hey, I'll let you know after I get the phone call.

 

[kokonut]

Yes, that is what a correlation is. And that number cannot be arrived at without experimental design, control for extraneous variables, and statistical analysis. And you are the one that brought up word discrimination. Are you now saying that auditory word discrimination is possible without sound perception?

Word discrimination already denotes the perception of sound. What else? As for correlation, that's the "R" or best fit comes in.

Like I said this isn't a rigorous scientific exercise, and it's for my own personal research based on my 20 years of experience talking to other hoh people over the phone who were gracious enough to send me their audiograms I have on file along with some numbers. This is something I've always been curious about. Now, if you don't like what I do, I'm sorry. I'm an extremely busy person here. If you son doesn't want to call me, fine. But please don't let your paranoia about your son get in the way, it's quite telling.

 

[jag]

That's true for YOU maybe, but not me and not many if not most other hoh folks out there for whom hearing aids work well for.........

Actually as one who has used both I have experience both and I can truthfully say that a CI does MUCH MORE then a HA ever could. I much perfer clarity from the CI. Sure beats complaining about not hearing, it beats not having to deal with people who get sick of repeating themselves and then just walk away saying forget it. I like my idea of success better for myself.

I didn't mean to imply that posties don't have issues in the classroom......they do. But my point being is that posties are more like parapelgics who aquire their disabilty, whereas prelingal and perilingal are more like people who've always had to use wheelchairs. .........

Ahh. well since they are SOOO different then just disregard my expericen since i'm sure that nothing that happened to myself or my daughter is relevant on this discussion board. we aren't 'that' deaf I guess.

jag, is your hoh daughter also the one who is MR? [COLOR="red"["COLOR="Red]][/COLOR]NO, but she is also hoh[/COLOR] I know that its notoriously hard to differentate MR from hearing loss. Back in the late seventies a lot of "MR" kids were discovered to simply be hoh. I know too that its hard to figure out what MR folks hear. .........[/QUOTE]

ROFLOL. First time I've heard that one. Perhaps I've dealt with more educated medical personal. Oh let me say that I had lots of experience being hoh in the 60's and 70's, never saw myself or anyone else being treated as MR because we couldn't hear. :/

[quote="deafdyke, post: 822306"]

Oh, and I am NOT being anti MR. I respect people with MR. God, I have a syndrome that can and DOES cause MR. I'm not bashing them. I'm simply saying that their sped needs are COMPLETLY different from kids with sensory and learning disabilites. When I bash the "Ummm who's President Bush?" types I'm talking about the students who clog up sped b/c there's no real other place for them. They are the apatheic ones who really give sped a bad name. They aren't MR..................

Well if you don't want me to continue to tell you to stop quit spelling speical the way you do. And quit with the scarcasm when discussing your parents decision to leave you in a program that was not appropriate for you. Those kids with speical needs deserver respect just as much as you think you should have had it when growing up. They were not the ones who were responsible for your placement so they don't deserve to be put down as you do. And I will call you on it every time I see it. It's one of those times when you need to remember that unless you can say it without disrespecting those not responsible for your treatment maybe it's best to not say anything at all.

Oh, and what does infant screening have to do with anything? Lots of people here were dx as dhh even without it. Hey, I WAS,(dx at 18months, has at three) and I have pretty much the same sort of loss as you do (reverse slope loss) I know it was really common for hoh kids to be dx somewhat late in the past.........but boy its hard to believe that someone would fall throu the cracks so easily....I mean usually people noticed around kindergarten and first grade.........

Whatever. I really don't care what you think. btw, did I say that the hearing loss would have been severe/profound when we started school. Nope.

 

[rick48]

Curious....to those who put blogs and videos of their kids on the Internet..is it because they r deaf? Would u still create a blog about them if they had been hearing?

I have never thought of making a blog about my children's progress on the Internet until I came to this site.

Is that a new trend or it is cuz u want to show the world how great CIs are?

I guess I don't see what the big deal is since I grew up orally with a severe profound hearing loss so to me seeing deaf people develop oral skills, it is not a big deal but I guess for people who don't know about deafness see it as a big deal?

I always saw myself and my friends just normal people living lives like anyone else with just some accodommations..nothing exciting there. The media makes a big deal about writing stories about deaf people being able to play sports, deaf people being able to get jobs and so on. I guess it is a good thing to have the exposure but at the same time, to my friends, co workers and I, we don't get wowed by those stories cuz many of us r doing the same things too. If a deaf person became the US President...ohhh that wud be a HUGE deal!

We r people too and we have the same goals as most hearing people too which r find good jobs we love, family, friends, good health, and have our own homes.

I do not have a blog about my child and her ci but my child recieved her ci in the pre-internet era.

I do not think you are curious at all about why parents are choosing to share their experiences with others, I think it is clear from the tone of your post that you disapprove of these blogs.

Even today there is still so much misinformation about cochlear implants that parents and others who are seeking information about cochlear implants often get sidetracked. These blogs are yet another wonderful resource to help parents learn, gather information and meet others who have or who are considering cochlear implants for their children.

Kudos to all the parents who are taking the time and making the effort to creat and maintain these blogs as they are making a difference and they are helping others.

Instead of putting these parents down, perhaps you and your co-workers should actually read them. You might actually learn something.

 

[rick48]

Actually as one who has used both I have experience both and I can truthfully say that a CI does MUCH MORE then a HA ever could. I much perfer clarity from the CI. Sure beats complaining about not hearing, it beats not having to deal with people who get sick of repeating themselves and then just walk away saying forget it. I like my idea of success better for myself.



Ahh. well since they are SOOO different then just disregard my expericen since i'm sure that nothing that happened to myself or my daughter is relevant on this discussion board. we aren't 'that' deaf I guess.



ROFLOL. First time I've heard that one. Perhaps I've dealt with more educated medical personal. Oh let me say that I had lots of experience being hoh in the 60's and 70's, never saw myself or anyone else being treated as MR because we couldn't hear. :/



Well if you don't want me to continue to tell you to stop quit spelling speical the way you do. And quit with the scarcasm when discussing your parents decision to leave you in a program that was not appropriate for you. Those kids with speical needs deserver respect just as much as you think you should have had it when growing up. They were not the ones who were responsible for your placement so they don't deserve to be put down as you do. And I will call you on it every time I see it. It's one of those times when you need to remember that unless you can say it without disrespecting those not responsible for your treatment maybe it's best to not say anything at all.




Whatever. I really don't care what you think. btw, did I say that the hearing loss would have been severe/profound when we started school. Nope.

Great Post!!!!!!

 

[rick48]

...I don't feel the need to put my child on display to bolster my own ego, as do those who create blogs about their deaf children to attempt to show off their parenting skills for the recognition it brings them as a parent. I don't find it necessary to display my child to the public as a way of using that child to gain sympathy for the work I do as a parent of a deaf child....

No, you just use this forum to do that.