Advice? We want our son to be mainstreamed. He wants to go to the School for the Deaf

Just let him try. I raised in mainstream school till graduated since the 4th grade because my parents refuse let me stay there because they plan to make me stay 3rd grade for another year just because of my age, I remember I was so down from attending to the mainstream school with the hearies and those deaf students who do the orally and hearing with the hearing aids, and have been begging on my parents to let me go back to deaf school. I remember I was crying many times, but till high school, I tried go back to the deaf school and they happened to not able to teach me because my level are too high for their school, but I went anyway for half mainstream and half deaf school and a few months later I decide to stay at mainstream school till graduated so I can keep my education up.

Sometimes I wish I stayed at the deaf school because of the communication and social stuff.
 
I don't believe that you would be limiting your son in any way by sending him to a deaf school. There's no reason that your son couldn't go to any college or university from a deaf school.

Adolescence is a difficult time emotionally, and attending a deaf school might help his emotional development. He needs to learn about himself and others, and the deaf school would give him more social opportunities.

Choosing the "right" school depends on the needs of the student. I would also give a lot of weight to your son's preferences. He knows what fit feels most comfortable.

I'm a former teacher and mom so I know how difficult choosing a school can be. My son chose which high school to attend this past year and he was very happy. Of course, I knew that if it wasn't a good fit, he could switch for his sophomore year. You have to let teenagers make their own decisions and model flexibility. I took letting my son choose his school pretty well. My son's learning to drive now, and I'm having a lot harder time with adjusting to that! :giggle:
 
I believe you should just let him choose, You know he's not happy there. If he will not be happy at a deaf school then you can always take him back into mainstream. ;)
 
I agree with Kaelei and I was raised in a similar situation. My whole life i went to oral and mainstream schools and my parents were told by a Audiologist that I would need to go to a "regular" school and that "deaf institutions" are not good for education for the deaf. My parents believed him and I had to suffer thru years of terror in a mainstream school. There was a time that I regretted not going to deaf school but now I let it go and went on with my life.

To the original poster, I would say this for advice: Listen to your son, or at least give the deaf school a try. If he likes it then good! If not, then at least you tried right?
 
There is a book called "alone in the mainstream". I think the above comments from former Deaf students tell you good advice. I am deaf in a hearing workplace. That is bad enough. Let him try. Deaf is good, Deaf community is good. It doesn't need "fixing" or mainstreaming. I am late deaf, but believe me, you learn fast. When you are different, it's like a different fish trying to "mainstream" with the salmon run. You can keep up, but you will always be "different" or "special" or "impaired". When you are with others who are deaf, it's nicer, more comfortable. Ah, let the guy try.
 
All the years I have always been in a public school in a program for the deaf and hard of hearing...afew years ago I have kind of wished that I have went to the deaf school so I would've made more deaf friends in person and everything but oh well I only have afew deaf friends which is okay lol

I was raised with something called Cued Speech which is the opposite communication method of sign language. I did not learn sign language until I was in 6th grade in middle school for the first time with other deaf people who only uses sign language so...even now I am still learning sign language and it is taking me a long time to get know the WHOLE thing but so far I am getting better at it than before lol.
 
Thank you my fellow friends at ADers for saving my time typing up the advise. Well said!

I grew up 100% Deaf school, and I came out just fine. I personally am darn glad that I never been in mainstream...

enuff said.
 
I also like your son. Mainstreamed until I reached the age of 14. I wanted to start high school at a Deaf School.

It was the best experience I ever had. I learned ASL and grew to have many friends. The Deaf School I attended still allowed me to mainstream to a public school for a English, Math and Literature. I thought it was great. The rest of my classes was taken at the Deaf School.
 
From a hearing parent and a professional:

Please listen to your son. He is at an age where psycho-social issues are extremely important. The way to insure that he develops the skills and the confidence he needs to be successful in this life is to place him in an environment in which he feels comfortable, accepted, and at ease.

Keeping him in the mainstream when he has already voiced the problems he has experienced there will only exacerbate the psycho-social issues. And those issues, in turn, will interfere with his academic performance.
 
I am offering my advice as someone who is new hoh, was raised hearing but was in Pull-Out Ex. Ed in mainstream for speech and language issues; undiagnosed LD til college and also as someone decided about a school as a kid.....I chose to go to high school I went to because I felt out of place and was physically and otherwise bullied up til high school. I felt alone for long time and felt people didn't understand me in many ways and found things frustrating and confusing. I was pretending to be someone I wasn't and I didn't feel safe...so I chose to go to arts-oriented high school. It was farther than the school I would have gone to. But I decided it was better for me and for the first time I felt "connected". I could be ME. Remember that "limiting" is based on perspective. Maybe in Deaf school your son can actually be FREE. He may end up choosing something else. But at least he was given the chance.
 
Listen to Jason, At 13 he knows what he wants. I wish I had the option to go to an all deaf school for secondary, I spent all my time with deaf peers and did not really mix with hearing peers.
 
I was mainstreamed all my life. I have excellent signing, speaking and lipreading skills. However I absolutely hated being mainstreamed. I did not fit in whatsoever. I was "that deaf kid". I was bullied, poked at, and outright ignored. I asked my parents so many times to let me go to another school, whether it was the deaf school or another mainstreamed program that had a large volume of deaf students (we have some in our area that have 20-30 deaf kids) because they don't stand out anywhere near as much as that one deaf kid. Yet my parents refused. I'm 38 now and I still have a great relationship with my parents, but I still hold social issues today around hearing people because of how rough my first 18 years were.
 
In high school I was mainstreamed for all class with maybe 2 other deaf people my age or sometimes on my own for the majority of the time. I was able to communicate with hearing peers but was forced into doing it by teachers of the deaf because they felt i should mixed with hearing kids instead of deaf kids. Even if I wanted to communicate with them i still feel left out and isolated because I could not communicate with them properly, I didnt feel like i fit in but I knew I fit in with my deaf peers because they were just like me, they were deaf and struggling with the same stuff as I was, e.g the hearing world, mainstream classes etc
 
I can only imagine the emotional roller coaster ride you must be having regarding your sons education. The journey continues. :) Your situation I am sure is creating all kinds of questions for you. These are simply a few that I can think of, and I am not you . You are his parent and know what is best for your child. :)

Have you:

1. Researched the deaf school as far as quality of education?
2. Can you be provided accurate information regarding grade level achievements for all core subjects?
3.How does the mainstream school quality of education compare to that of the deaf school?
 
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According to the OP, this is more about addressing psycho-social aspects of the educational environment. Those, in turn, effect a child's ability to function academically in a very direct way.
 
loml said:
I can only imagine the emotional roller coaster ride you must be having regarding your sons education. The journey continues. :) Your situation I am sure is creating all kinds of questions for you. These are simply a few that I can think of, and I am not you . You are his parent and know what is best for your child. :)

Have you:

1. Researched the deaf school as far as quality of education?
2. Can you be provided accurate information regarding grade level achievements for all core subjects?
3.How does the mainstream school quality of education compare to that of the deaf school?
Click to expand...

Iam curious..if the child is so miserable in the mainstreamed program, doesn't that count for something?

Have u ever experienced feeling completely isolated while mainstreamed?
 
thanks everybody

Hi this is jason, my mom and dad started the thread and let me read the answers. i wanted to thank every one for telling them that i should get to do what i want to do. :D

Im not miserable where i am now, i just dont fit in. i just feel like i never know whats going on cause ppl think its too much trouble to let me in on it. its like every body else got told about the party but nobody figure out that i didnt hear ppl talking about it so i didnt know about it so i didnt get to go. nobody figured out that they couldve sent the deaf kid a note or something. there are some other reasons i dont like school where i am too. it would probly suck even if i was hearing.

My favorite thing is wrestling but I do that at the highschool next door and not at the middleschool I go to. the highschool kids are pretty cool with me but thats probly because i helped them win a state championship. :D

we dont live in michgan, our deafschool doesnt suck but thanks for letting me know. :D

thx again everybody,

jason
 
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You are welcome, Jeremy.

Good luck with everything! :wave:
 
sevenhudsons said:
Hi this is jason, my mom and dad started the thread and let me read the answers. i wanted to thank every one for telling them that i should get to do what i want to do. :D

Im not miserable where i am now, i just dont fit in. i just feel like i never know whats going on cause ppl think its too much trouble to let me in on it. its like every body else got told about the party but nobody figure out that i didnt hear ppl talking about it so i didnt know about it so i didnt get to go. nobody figured out that they couldve sent the deaf kid a note or something. there are some other reasons i dont like school where i am too. it would probly suck even if i was hearing.

My favorite thing is wrestling but I do that at the highschool next door and not at the middleschool I go to. the highschool kids are pretty cool with me but thats probly because i helped them win a state championship. :D

we dont live in michgan, our deafschool doesnt suck but thanks for letting me know. :D

thx again everybody,

jason
Click to expand...

Several deaf schools have wrestling.

Check out the athletic dept as well. Since you are into wrestling.

Good luck, with where ever you end up going.
 
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