I'm a recently new deaf person, who also went through the process or rigors of trying to find out why. While everyone around who I work with have from go, said get implant and have lost patience or just say I don't know to my questions so they don't have to communicate. It feels like I am whipping boy at work everything is my fault now. But, low man or I am the weakest link in their eyes. The hurtful thing is that I gave yrs and yrs of loyalty through the owners personal problems to growing the business on my own time and expense. I was the go to person now I'm the ignored person or better yet blamed for everything person.. One of the people I work with said I'm lucky not to her it. I said I would rather hear it than see body language or frustration in their movements. Now they urn away to talk so I won't read their lips.
There is always down time and so they conversate I used to read. But, in heir eyes if I'm reading I'm not working, so I get all the looks and tap tap tap on the shoulder or counter or pulling of shirt to get attention to do what they want, while they continue to conversation and do nothing. I don't mind it's the way they tell me to do it. Not once have they asked if their was a way to easily communicate instead they start writing then just say " forget it" or this one wave me off like a kid.....it seems my IQ dropped with hearing. I know I've ever treated any of them with that level of disrespect.
The worst part is nt knowing how I lost hearing. They cannot say even tried to say from smoking..... I don't or haven't had a cigarette since I or sick on one in high school. Here is a funny thing.... The dr's I went to were all past friends who I've known and worked with. All said same thing to just an ear infection. And yes, the path was littered with everyone saying oh sorry, get implant, it is black or white with them. They didn't believe me when I said there was still sound at one pt. I would get mad when they would try to push me into getting CI but don't want anything sewed into my head that is not removable. Even the House clinic told me that I should not have sounds the way I did and must be phantom sounds.
During all of this I would get dizzy spells from certain sounds that would get me dizzy, nauseated . I am more patient now than before but it was long road:roll:
I have same problem, except you still have a job. I was self employed since 2005 then lost 100% hearing in November 2011 to ear infection, and work coming in has slid down to zilch, and moving to Fox, Alaska is my only option at this point.
As for "phantom sounds" yes, I would hear hammers, gunshots, voices that weren't there, and other strange sounds. It's like a phantom limb or as if you had accidentally cut off your finger, you would swear that you were able to feel the finger at times. The brain is hard wired to have all these connections and now one of them is gone, and so the brain is trying to figure out what to do with it and keeps trying to connect. In dreams, I have full stereo sound, voices, conversations, keyboard clicking, road noises, engines, dinner sizzling on the stove, everything. Only to awake to silence and tinnitus sound. It was hard at first, but as time went on the going from hearing clearly in my dreams to silence in the day time has gotten somewhat easier, but no lie- it's not easy.
For the people around you treating you like you know nothing, or are suddenly brain-dead, they are uncomfortable. You look around, and you will find someone who is genuine and isn't scared. That person (sorry to stereotype) will likely be the quiet computer person or the outgoing bubbly person who is unfortunately very lonely in life, and they have no fear of you simply because your hearing don't work. That person is someone who you will discover to be a secretly hidden charismatic, funny, and possibly a future best friend.
Don't do what I did during the hard transition to deafness, I got so fed up with the hearies idiotic things that I grouped them all into one box and pissed on them out of frustration. Yes. It's a two way street. It's NOT easy being treated like trash, and it's very easy and understanding to lash out for being disrespected and stepped on. Every creature on this planet will assert their space, and most don't like being told to back the hell off and treat you like a normal person.
If you ever make it to Alaska, perhaps I can show you how to fast educate a hearie in public so you don't look like an ass, and they don't get offended.
However, I find it funny, and still do, that back when my lungs were burned out by diesel exhaust and I had no audible voice (prior to being deaf), I dated a deaf girl, and we would go to restaurant, and I could hear, and she could speak. Really had a lot of fun there! Poor waiter/ waitress people didn't know what to think about that!
-Chris
I'm also muddling through ASL by myself. Set up a support group around you, and enjoy what you have now. Stay on here, and get comfort from us. We're here, always. What you need to do now is to get a support group like your family and friends, enjoy what you have. Are you going to get hearing aids? What kind of loss do you have now? (Mild, moderate, severe, etc.)
needsleep and soulchill-
I'm sorry you're having a hard time. And thanks for your reply in response to my post before.
