4 years old accused of improperly touching teacher

[Liebling:-)))]

what's next?? if a boy says a girl is pretty.. he's going to be accused for sexual harrassment???

good one...

 

[Eve]

If you've been studying for 14 years, you probably have as much understanding as I do. You don't always have to be in a classroom to learn.

Actually, one thing I found from college classes is that generally more than one perspective was observed. I also find that we never stop learning, whether through courses or personal experiences, so you could say that we all have more than 14 years of studying under our belts.

 

[jillio]

Actually, one thing I found from college classes is that generally more than one perspective was observed. I also find that we never stop learning, whether through courses or personal experiences, so you could say that we all have more than 14 years of studying under our belts.

In life, more than one perspective is observed if one is tolerant and open minded. And not all of us have 14 years studying under our belts, becasue it is obvious that some prefer to close their minds and see no other perspective other than their own, despite the fact that they arepresented with the opportunity to learn and grow.

You were a bit harsh in your comments towards leibling. She was referring to the fact that we are often in agreement, not only regarding this issue, but several other discussions we have both participated in as well.

You seemed to be terribly quick to label this four year old a predator, based on nothing more than your personal experience. Neither of us are priviledged to have all the facts in the case, however, my opinion was not based only on personal experience, but can be supported clinically as well.

No one is discounting your experience with your stepson, and I'm sure that it has been a tragic event in not only your life but the lives of all your family members, stepson included. I do hope that you and your family are continuing to receive help for the issues you have gone through, because, given your defensiveness, and your quickness to discount the opinions of numerous other posters who were expressing opinions on the situation reported, it would be my professional opinion that you have not effectively dealt with your own issues, and as a consequence are allowing your experience to dictate the views of another's experience.

I said it before, and I will say it again, this child did nothing more than hug a teacher and come in contact with her chest in the process. He was not accused of anything other than harrassment. He has been accused of no predatory acts, no attempted rapes, no touching innappropriately--nothing to indicate that he was in any way exposed to explicit sexual material, nor that he had been sexually abused. It is very likely that this child was nothing more than a breast fed baby, and therefore, saw nothing wrong with coming in contact with this area of a woman's anatomy, particularly given that he had developed a trusting relationship with her as a teacher. While it is necessary to correct him, and explain that this is not appropriate, to punish and shame is to do the kind of harm that creates neurosis that will last a lifetime and impair his future judgement regarding sexual behavior.

This child is not a predator. He is not seeking out other children and initiating sexual contact, he is not forcibly touching other children, he is not seeking sexual gratification. He simply hugged a teacher. How many times have you been standing in a crowded room and brushed up against another woman's breasts accidentally? I say that has happen to all of us. Are we deviant because of it? Are we all to be labeled sexual predators because of it? I think not.

To consider that what this child did, as it was reported, could not even be considered something close to harrassment. He did not say, "Hey, Teach! Nice boobs! Can I rub my face on them?" The only thing this child is guilty of is being a child. If anyone is guilty of wrongdoing, it is the teacher who is the accuser, and the school system for giving validity to her ridiculas claim.

 

[Eve]

You seemed to be terribly quick to label this four year old a predator, based on nothing more than your personal experience. Neither of us are priviledged to have all the facts in the case, however, my opinion was not based only on personal experience, but can be supported clinically as well.

Actually, I was quick to point out that it was a possibility, and that we did not have enough knowledge of the facts regarding this specific case to form an informed opinion on the matter one way or the other. Furthermore, you know that with clinical findings there are many times contradictory results from one study to the next.

your quickness to discount the opinions of numerous other posters who were expressing opinions on the situation reported,

I am not quick to discount an informed opinion. I am quick to point out that there are often more than one scenario to any situation. We only have one side of the story here, so how are we to come to an informed opinion?

I said it before, and I will say it again, this child did nothing more than hug a teacher and come in contact with her chest in the process.

Since you were not there to witness the incident, and all we have so far is the word of a 4-year-old, we have no way of knowing that this is all that took place.

It is very likely that this child was nothing more than a breast fed baby, and therefore, saw nothing wrong with coming in contact with this area of a woman's anatomy, particularly given that he had developed a trusting relationship with her as a teacher.

This is also a plausible explanation, but we don’t know this for sure either, do we?

To consider that what this child did, as it was reported, could not even be considered something close to harrassment.

You just hit the nail on the head…AS IT WAS REPORTED. I have seen too many times when the media has twisted facts, given us limited information, all for the sake of propaganda. I tend to follow the American legal system’s belief of “innocent until proven guilty” both for the child as well as for the teacher. I am in support of a full investigation into the matter so that all the facts of the case may be disclosed and an informed conclusion be drawn.

As I said before, IF there was more to the situation than the media has chosen to report, it is still the schools’ responsibility to ensure the safety of the other students as well as the staff.

It is just terribly difficult for me to assume that the teacher would cause such a ruckus over such an innocent act as a hug from a 4-year-old.

 

[Angel]

I have seen too many times when the media has twisted facts, given us limited information, .....

and yet you're still protecting the school?...

it is still the schools’ responsibility to ensure the safety of the other students as well as the staff

From what? over a hug?

 

[Eve]

and yet you're still protecting the school?...

until a formal investigation can collect ALL of the information from all parties involved, yes.

From what? over a hug?

Don't be silly. I know hugs are not evil, but what I don't know is whether this was just a hug or not. I would like to hear the teacher's side before forming an opinion on the matter.

 

[Eve]

this is just an example of how conclusions can be reached when all the information has not been presented:

years ago when I was teaching in inner-city Dallas, one of my students told his mother that I had called him a "monkey". The mother came to the school demanding my job and head on a platter. The principal, being a wise man, and knowing that there must be more to the story than what the child had told his mother, decided to call all the parties together for a conference to get to the bottom of the matter. The mother was steaming out her ears and ready to physically attack me for the wrong she believed I had inflicted upon her child. When it was my turn to talk, I explained how her precious son (who I truly did adore) had been acting out in class and when I would ask the class a question, he would jump up and down in his seat, going "oooooooo ooooooo ooooooo" and I merely told him to stop acting like a monkey and raise his hand quietly. The mother immediately looked over at her son and said "I know she's tellin' the truth, cuz' you do that at home too!" It was all a matter of perception. While the student had not actually lied about the incident, his take on the situation was far different than mine. Furthermore, the mother had the opportunity to come into my classroom and see a picture of my gorgeous biracial daughter on my desk. That was enough for her to realize that my statement was not intended to be a racial slur.

Situations such as this are why I try to get all sides to a story before I come to any conclusions.

 

[Angel]

until a formal investigation can collect ALL of the information from all parties involved, yes.

I'm sorry but this doesn't make any sense Eve, again you're still protecting the school when we don't have enough information from both parties...yet you telling us we are jumping to conclusions when most of us said that the school did was wrong by suspended this 4 years old child for hugging his teacher aid...

Don't be silly. I know hugs are not evil, but what I don't know is whether this was just a hug or not. I would like to hear the teacher's side before forming an opinion on the matter.

Honestly, I'm not trying to be silly here Eve, I'm trying to understand what is the school trying to protect from this 4 years old child?...

 

[Eve]

we don't know, do we?

 

[Angel]

this is just an example of how conclusions can be reached when all the information has not been presented:

years ago when I was teaching in inner-city Dallas, one of my students told his mother that I had called him a "monkey". The mother came to the school demanding my job and head on a platter. The principal, being a wise man, and knowing that there must be more to the story than what the child had told his mother, decided to call all the parties together for a conference to get to the bottom of the matter. The mother was steaming out her ears and ready to physically attack me for the wrong she believed I had inflicted upon her child. When it was my turn to talk, I explained how her precious son (who I truly did adore) had been acting out in class and when I would ask the class a question, he would jump up and down in his seat, going "oooooooo ooooooo ooooooo" and I merely told him to stop acting like a monkey and raise his hand quietly. The mother immediately looked over at her son and said "I know she's tellin' the truth, cuz' you do that at home too!" It was all a matter of perception. While the student had not actually lied about the incident, his take on the situation was far different than mine. Furthermore, the mother had the opportunity to come into my classroom and see a picture of my gorgeous biracial daughter on my desk. That was enough for her to realize that my statement was not intended to be a racial slur.

Situations such as this are why I try to get all sides to a story before I come to any conclusions.

Of course children lies so do teachers, parents etc etc.....

 

[Angel]

we don't know, do we?

Right , but still you are protecting the school Eve ....even we don't know if the school is handle this situation in the right way, and still you think the school IS....I don't get it...

 

[Eve]

Of course children lies so do teachers, parents etc etc.....

But this child wasn't lying, he just had a different perception of the situation than I had.

 

[Eve]

Right , but still you are protecting the school Eve ....even we don't know if the school is handle this situation in the right way, and still you think the school IS....I don't get it...

because here in America we have this thing called "innocent until proven guilty". This goes for the teacher/school as well as the child.

 

[Liebling:-)))]

Why can´t you open your mind to see the pretty logic, Eve... *sigh*


*A*M*E*N* jillio

 

[Eve]

Why can´t you open your mind to see the pretty logic, Eve... *sigh*

Because your form of logic doesn't seem to coincide with the logic exhibited by the U.S. justice system.

 

[Angel]

because here in America we have this thing called "innocent until proven guilty". This goes for the teacher/school as well as the child.

Right but what made the teacher and the school think this 4 years old is guilty?

But this child wasn't lying, he just had a different perception of the situation than I had

I re-read your post again, I apologize for misunderstanding you...

 

[Angel]

Because your form of logic doesn't seem to coincide with the logic exhibited by the U.S. justice system.

I'm sure that Liebling is aware that her country and the US justice system may be different but that doesn't mean she has a lack of knowing how our system really works here....

Let's be nice....

 

[Eve]

Right but what made the teacher and the school think this 4 years old is guilty?

We don't know, because we haven't heard from the teacher and the school yet.

I re-read your post again, I apologize for misunderstanding you...

Thank you, Angel.

 

[Eve]

I'm sure that Liebling is aware that her country and the US justice system may be different but that doesn't mean she has a lack of knowing how our system really works here....

Let's be nice....

I was being nice. I simply stated that logic comes in all forms and that doesn't necessarily mean that I was being illogical as Liebling was indicating.

 

[rockdrummer]

Damarcus Blackwell's four-year-old son was lining-up to get on the bus after school last month, when he was accused of rubbing his face in the chest of a female employee.

WOW.. that is either one tall four year old or one very short Teachers aid if his face was in her chest. Geeze!!