You ever get people who tell you not to use sign language?

Fumasivil said:
Sorry for the long post.

Yeah, it's all too common in the UK. Schools were encouraging deaf people to speak than to sign.

I remember all that BS from the 70's from 'experts' believing that all deaf children should be taught how to speak no matter how bad their hearing or lack of benefit from hearing aids give them.

I had intensive speech therapy from a tiny tot till primary school that the teachers there said that I had a larger vocabulary than the kids there. I was brought up in the total communication method which I found really helpful in understanding things. But my speech therapy was stopped when I left for Oral High school and was deemed 'passable' speech?!?!.

I signed to supplement my speech cos it was making my life hard for others to understand me - and I get this instead 'stop signing, put your hands under your legs, use your voice!' by my parents and other people. I was dumbfounded/insulted so I didn't sign. :shock:

To this day, I still talk more than sign as I saw it was a necessity out there in the hearing world if I wanted to get to places - career wise. At least my speech has improved with better hearing aids but I do fear for those who cannot gain any help from their HA's. I'm getting a CI this year and I hope it'll clarify things up for me as I find HA's muffle alot of the sounds I hear. I'm profoundly deaf by the way. I believe everyone has a choice regardless of the stigma or culture they're in. BSL, ASL whatever IS a language. Heck, they even have sign language terps at the United Nations!.

I had an interesting conversation with my mother about this, she just said that she was going by the advice of the 'professionals' in the 70's and that sign language was deemed limiting and she didn't want that for me and wanted me to speak well. I said to her, don't you find that insulting to those who cannot speak and need to sign in order to communicate?, she said no, but after a further debating about this subject. She now realises it's wrong to take away the deaf person's means of communication - namely sign language from them. As she now starts to see from a deaf person's perspective.

She now apologises profusely for telling me off for signing when I was younger. But she always says she feels left out if I sign to my friends, and my response was, what about me when you all natter together and I can't even follow the conversation and you wouldn't even tell me whats going on by saying 'it's nothing' ?! - She now gets it after all these years - a bit too late in my book but nonetheless the enlightenment has happened!

In my mother's words - she absolutely floored me with this! after debating about Oralism V Sign Language.
'For a deaf person - regardless of their hearing loss - demands an equal access to information/resources (yeah!). This should be provided in the best communicative means for that person - BSL, SSE, ASL, French, Italian etc.. This way the person can take away on board all that information and assimilate it, grow from it and become a better educated person as a result. If that person's means of communication was taken away from them - how do they learn? not much and the end result a frustrated, demeaned and depressed person (sure yeah). If the person has a such drive to well, they'll find ways of getting around/accessing it but it comes at a price. is that true ?'

Who said that we deaf people aren't that creative, heck we are - just to access the same information as our hearing peers! Mebee we all should apply for M16/CIA/FBI :lol:

She's getting there... but she refuses to learn sign language citing old age! no-one's never too old to learn but I'm not pushing it for forsaking our mother/daughter relationship.
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Damn! What a great posting!
 
Fumasivil said:
Sorry for the long post.

Yeah, it's all too common in the UK. Schools were encouraging deaf people to speak than to sign.

I remember all that BS from the 70's from 'experts' believing that all deaf children should be taught how to speak no matter how bad their hearing or lack of benefit from hearing aids give them.

I had intensive speech therapy from a tiny tot till primary school that the teachers there said that I had a larger vocabulary than the kids there. I was brought up in the total communication method which I found really helpful in understanding things. But my speech therapy was stopped when I left for Oral High school and was deemed 'passable' speech?!?!.

I signed to supplement my speech cos it was making my life hard for others to understand me - and I get this instead 'stop signing, put your hands under your legs, use your voice!' by my parents and other people. I was dumbfounded/insulted so I didn't sign. :shock:

To this day, I still talk more than sign as I saw it was a necessity out there in the hearing world if I wanted to get to places - career wise. At least my speech has improved with better hearing aids but I do fear for those who cannot gain any help from their HA's. I'm getting a CI this year and I hope it'll clarify things up for me as I find HA's muffle alot of the sounds I hear. I'm profoundly deaf by the way. I believe everyone has a choice regardless of the stigma or culture they're in. BSL, ASL whatever IS a language. Heck, they even have sign language terps at the United Nations!.

I had an interesting conversation with my mother about this, she just said that she was going by the advice of the 'professionals' in the 70's and that sign language was deemed limiting and she didn't want that for me and wanted me to speak well. I said to her, don't you find that insulting to those who cannot speak and need to sign in order to communicate?, she said no, but after a further debating about this subject. She now realises it's wrong to take away the deaf person's means of communication - namely sign language from them. As she now starts to see from a deaf person's perspective.

She now apologises profusely for telling me off for signing when I was younger. But she always says she feels left out if I sign to my friends, and my response was, what about me when you all natter together and I can't even follow the conversation and you wouldn't even tell me whats going on by saying 'it's nothing' ?! - She now gets it after all these years - a bit too late in my book but nonetheless the enlightenment has happened!

In my mother's words - she absolutely floored me with this! after debating about Oralism V Sign Language.
'For a deaf person - regardless of their hearing loss - demands an equal access to information/resources (yeah!). This should be provided in the best communicative means for that person - BSL, SSE, ASL, French, Italian etc.. This way the person can take away on board all that information and assimilate it, grow from it and become a better educated person as a result. If that person's means of communication was taken away from them - how do they learn? not much and the end result a frustrated, demeaned and depressed person (sure yeah). If the person has a such drive to do well, they'll find ways of getting around/accessing it but it comes at a price. is that true ?'

Who said that we deaf people aren't that creative, heck we are - just to access the same information as our hearing peers! Mebee we all should apply for M16/CIA/FBI :lol:

She's getting there... but she refuses to learn sign language citing old age! no-one's never too old to learn but I'm not pushing it for forsaking our mother/daughter relationship.
Click to expand...
Awesome post!
 
I was told I shouldn't learn to sign because it'll interfere with my ability to speak by the mom of a deaf son. A friend in high school had deaf parents and I understand how embarrassed some people are of speaking, so I applaud his confidence. At the same time I felt very sorry for her son having to struggle so hard every day because his mom didn't want him to learn sign language. He had a cochlear implant, but his speaking still wasn't very clear and you still had to speak very clearly and slowly while he read your lips. Knowing the problems I have since I don't know sign language yet, I really feel for this boy. His whole life seems to have been a struggle to communicate with everyone because his mother won't allow him to use other methods. No one should have to struggle to understand others with so many easier ways to communicate.

I am going to remember that about muting the tv , someone is always turning off my captions the few times I watch tv. What a great way to make a point!
 
Byrdie714 said:
Same here.

My father was visiting one time and he turned off the close captioning on my television set as it "bothered him". He set the remote between us and I picked it up and hit the "MUTE" button.

"What did you do that FOR? I'm missing out what's being said!"

I looked at him, smiled and said, "My point."

The captions came back on......
Click to expand...

omg that's very good idea! Now I am gonna do that to my stepmom! She alwaysss turn CC off. I was like why?..she said its distract her.
 
Oh yeah, all the time - I had a friend of the wife tell me to stop signing to my daughter, because "It's making her lazy and she doesn't want to talk". :roll: I told her she doesn't know what she's talking about.

There's been people also tutting, shaking their heads, frowning, and even one downright coming up to me and saying "You shouldn't do that there DEAF TALK thing to a child! She won't talk!" :eek3: :shock:

I've even had people mumbling "Excuse me, excuse me, excuse me, excuse me, excuse me" to get past me for something else when I'm signing with the wife or my daughter. :D
 
Byrdie714 said:
Same here.

My father was visiting one time and he turned off the close captioning on my television set as it "bothered him". He set the remote between us and I picked it up and hit the "MUTE" button.

"What did you do that FOR? I'm missing out what's being said!"

I looked at him, smiled and said, "My point."

The captions came back on......
Click to expand...

haha owned
 
I was at the hospital last sunday and the nurses told me if I wanted their help that I had to talk. They refused to assist me if I did not talk. They were trying to force me to talk. My mom actually pushed my girlfriend out of the way who was trying to tell them I had a right to sign. My girlfriend actually got past mom and wrote on the papper, "he has a right to sign".

They said they were going to get me an interpreter but they never did. They refused to give me an interpreter. The nurses actually were talking around me with mom and others and refused to write anything down. They would not inform me on anything.
 
jasin said:
I get people all the time who tell me not to use sign language. I pisses me off :mad::mad2: soooo much!!
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What kind of situation are people telling you not to use sign language? What would they have you do instead?
 
My best friends...or are they?

I'm a senior in high school now. All through my junior year, I have been taking sign language as a class. As I have learned more, I have wanted to use more. My little sister once yelled at me for signing. My boyfriend held my hands together (that only happened once before i told him off). and my best guy friend mocked me.

Here's the thing, I love them all, but sometimes I just don't like them. I have told all of them, because they are all hearing, that I would sign AND voice. My speech is near perfect for my level of hearing loss but if I want to be a part of the deaf community or at least be able to communicate with other deaf people I need to practice no? gosh. sometimes it can be so annoying...

ESPECIALLY when I compromise with THEM...voice AND sign together...I PROMISED...i guess some people will just never understand.
 
alyssabonita1 said:
I'm a senior in high school now. All through my junior year, I have been taking sign language as a class. As I have learned more, I have wanted to use more. My little sister once yelled at me for signing. My boyfriend held my hands together (that only happened once before i told him off). and my best guy friend mocked me.

Here's the thing, I love them all, but sometimes I just don't like them. I have told all of them, because they are all hearing, that I would sign AND voice. My speech is near perfect for my level of hearing loss but if I want to be a part of the deaf community or at least be able to communicate with other deaf people I need to practice no? gosh. sometimes it can be so annoying...

ESPECIALLY when I compromise with THEM...voice AND sign together...I PROMISED...i guess some people will just never understand.
Click to expand...

You would probably be better off seeking out the deaf community to sign.

Your hearing family does not have any motivation to sign if you are able to communicate with voice.
 
that's why i absolutely can not WAIT to go to Gally this summer! one WHOLE month of pure signing. even though my skills are not up to par, I think I will learn SO much this summer that I can come back and use sign and voice simultaneously without stopping.

I've vowed to tell anyone off if they keep me from signing. I don't want to lose my ability to sign. In fact, I want to keep getting stronger and better at it. The only way to do this is by continuing to sign. If only there were some way to get my family and friends to understand this...hmmm.
 
alyssabonita1 said:
I'm a senior in high school now. All through my junior year, I have been taking sign language as a class. As I have learned more, I have wanted to use more. My little sister once yelled at me for signing. My boyfriend held my hands together (that only happened once before i told him off). and my best guy friend mocked me.

Here's the thing, I love them all, but sometimes I just don't like them. I have told all of them, because they are all hearing, that I would sign AND voice. My speech is near perfect for my level of hearing loss but if I want to be a part of the deaf community or at least be able to communicate with other deaf people I need to practice no? gosh. sometimes it can be so annoying...

ESPECIALLY when I compromise with THEM...voice AND sign together...I PROMISED...i guess some people will just never understand.
Click to expand...

People can be assholes when it comes to deaf people wanting to use sign language even though they have good speech. I have been through it too.
 
I love, love, love Byrdie714's way of handling the CC issue!

I grew up hearing, and am now HOH. I'm learning ASL now. My aunt is Deaf from childhood. And everyone -- doctors, teachers -- told my grandparents that signing was bad for her. My aunt learned to sign at school. My parents _forbid_ me to learn sign as a child. Even fingerspelling! Why? They thought my aunt and her husband, who were both Deaf, signed all the time, and have great difficulty communicating by speech, would be "harmed" by it!

The kicker? My family pretty much all lives in the same small town, and my cousin (my aunt's daughter) was my closest friend growing up. I was over at their house all the time!

My mom is starting to get over it a bit and learn a little sign. Why? Because my cousin has two little boys, and my mom adores them. My mom is like a second grandma to the boys. She's over at my cousin's house all the time.

My cousin is making sure her boys, who are both hearing, learn sign. The boys have figured out that my mom and dad don't sign. So the boys feel sorry for my parents, and are teaching them. :lol: It's so cute! The boys are very young -- one's three, the other's two. And as much as my mom has refused to learn sign all these years, she won't refuse the boys. So she's finally learning!
 
ms_redcat said:
I love, love, love Byrdie714's way of handling the CC issue!

I grew up hearing, and am now HOH. I'm learning ASL now. My aunt is Deaf from childhood. And everyone -- doctors, teachers -- told my grandparents that signing was bad for her. My aunt learned to sign at school. My parents _forbid_ me to learn sign as a child. Even fingerspelling! Why? They thought my aunt and her husband, who were both Deaf, signed all the time, and have great difficulty communicating by speech, would be "harmed" by it!

The kicker? My family pretty much all lives in the same small town, and my cousin (my aunt's daughter) was my closest friend growing up. I was over at their house all the time!

My mom is starting to get over it a bit and learn a little sign. Why? Because my cousin has two little boys, and my mom adores them. My mom is like a second grandma to the boys. She's over at my cousin's house all the time.

My cousin is making sure her boys, who are both hearing, learn sign. The boys have figured out that my mom and dad don't sign. So the boys feel sorry for my parents, and are teaching them. :lol: It's so cute! The boys are very young -- one's three, the other's two. And as much as my mom has refused to learn sign all these years, she won't refuse the boys. So she's finally learning!
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Better late than never. :) I'm glad your family knows sign so you'll find it easier to cope with your late onset deafness. It's awsome.
 
ismi said:
If a Deaf person doesn't ID as disabled, I don't have a problem with that; I think that's perfectly justifiable. But to justify that lack of identity by implying that disability makes someone helpless or unable to live a 'normal' life is just offensive, and it is even more frustrating when you realize that Deaf people experience - and fight against - the same sort of negative attitudes from the hearing world.
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That's how I feel as a deafblind person
 
Fumasivil said:
Sorry for the long post.

Yeah, it's all too common in the UK. Schools were encouraging deaf people to speak than to sign.

I remember all that BS from the 70's from 'experts' believing that all deaf children should be taught how to speak no matter how bad their hearing or lack of benefit from hearing aids give them.

I had intensive speech therapy from a tiny tot till primary school that the teachers there said that I had a larger vocabulary than the kids there. I was brought up in the total communication method which I found really helpful in understanding things. But my speech therapy was stopped when I left for Oral High school and was deemed 'passable' speech?!?!.

I signed to supplement my speech cos it was making my life hard for others to understand me - and I get this instead 'stop signing, put your hands under your legs, use your voice!' by my parents and other people. I was dumbfounded/insulted so I didn't sign. :shock:

To this day, I still talk more than sign as I saw it was a necessity out there in the hearing world if I wanted to get to places - career wise. At least my speech has improved with better hearing aids but I do fear for those who cannot gain any help from their HA's. I'm getting a CI this year and I hope it'll clarify things up for me as I find HA's muffle alot of the sounds I hear. I'm profoundly deaf by the way. I believe everyone has a choice regardless of the stigma or culture they're in. BSL, ASL whatever IS a language. Heck, they even have sign language terps at the United Nations!.

I had an interesting conversation with my mother about this, she just said that she was going by the advice of the 'professionals' in the 70's and that sign language was deemed limiting and she didn't want that for me and wanted me to speak well. I said to her, don't you find that insulting to those who cannot speak and need to sign in order to communicate?, she said no, but after a further debating about this subject. She now realises it's wrong to take away the deaf person's means of communication - namely sign language from them. As she now starts to see from a deaf person's perspective.

She now apologises profusely for telling me off for signing when I was younger. But she always says she feels left out if I sign to my friends, and my response was, what about me when you all natter together and I can't even follow the conversation and you wouldn't even tell me whats going on by saying 'it's nothing' ?! - She now gets it after all these years - a bit too late in my book but nonetheless the enlightenment has happened!

In my mother's words - she absolutely floored me with this! after debating about Oralism V Sign Language.
'For a deaf person - regardless of their hearing loss - demands an equal access to information/resources (yeah!). This should be provided in the best communicative means for that person - BSL, SSE, ASL, French, Italian etc.. This way the person can take away on board all that information and assimilate it, grow from it and become a better educated person as a result. If that person's means of communication was taken away from them - how do they learn? not much and the end result a frustrated, demeaned and depressed person (sure yeah). If the person has a such drive to do well, they'll find ways of getting around/accessing it but it comes at a price. is that true ?'

Who said that we deaf people aren't that creative, heck we are - just to access the same information as our hearing peers! Mebee we all should apply for M16/CIA/FBI :lol:

She's getting there... but she refuses to learn sign language citing old age! no-one's never too old to learn but I'm not pushing it for forsaking our mother/daughter relationship.
Click to expand...

Great post.
 
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