Would you prefer to...

[metalangel]

I tried to date one woman whom I was not attracted to, but felt she had a good personality and knew my party of friends. It was a total disaster and I will not do it again. Not only is this not the right thing to do it is dumb. You are not doing the other person any favors and more harm than good.

There has to be some attraction and physical connection as well as certain personality attributes which attract you. And even with all that, it doesn't stop the other person from creating issues you don't like so you at least should start with something, IMO.

To answer the question: There has to be a mix. I couldn't stay with someone who is hot, but didn't (on some level) have at least common sense in common. And, I couldn't stay with someone whom I wasn't attracted to either.

I think that everyone's definition of 'cute' for a potential partner is different, because what I might find irresistible physically or mentally other people might be put off by. Likewise, everyone functions differently... I have friends where the man and the woman alternate between being devoted and playfully putting the other one down. I just can't understand that sort of thing but they are very happy so who am I to judge? They seem to fit each other perfectly.

 

[VacationGuy234]

I think that everyone's definition of 'cute' for a potential partner is different, because what I might find irresistible physically or mentally other people might be put off by. Likewise, everyone functions differently... I have friends where the man and the woman alternate between being devoted and playfully putting the other one down. I just can't understand that sort of thing but they are very happy so who am I to judge? They seem to fit each other perfectly.

I agree. I'm not a big fan of disrespectful relationships, but some people don't have a problem with it. I think light sarcasm is OK, but I'd never cross the line to calling my partner offensive names, it's just not right.

 

[Jiro]

Sex actually is a fairly important part of a relationship, in fact sometimes it can make or break one. If you're okay with, for an example, buying a new car with out taking it for a test drive, well suit yourself. But you're really not in a position to pass judgements and "disgustings" on people if they consider compatibility in bed also is an issue.

goddamn right. gotta test drive it first before I seal the deal

 

[Reba]

goddamn right. gotta test drive it first before I seal the deal

A human being is not a car.

A relationship is not a "deal."

 

[femme Fatale]

A subjective answer to a subjective question:

[yt]8N2k-gv6xNE[/yt]

"Any Man Of Mine"

This is what a woman wants... Any man of mine better be proud of me Even when I'm ugly he still better love me And I can be late for a date that's fine But he better be on time

Any man of mine'll say it fits just right When last year's dress is just a little too tight And anything I do or say better be okay When I have a bad hair day

And if I change my mind A million times I wanna hear him say Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah I like it that way

Any man of mine better walk the line Better show me a teasin' squeezin' pleasin' kinda time I need a man who knows, how the story goes He's gotta be a heartbeatin' fine treatin' Breathtakin' earthquakin' kind Any man of mine

Well any man of mine better disagree When I say another woman's lookin' better than me And when I cook him dinner and I burn it black He better say, mmmm, I like it like that yeah

And if I changed my mind A million times I wanna hear him say Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah I like it that way

Any man of mine better walk the line Better show me a teasin' squeezin' pleasin' kinda time I need a man who knows, how the story goes He's gotta be a heartbeatin' fine treatin' Breathtakin' earthquakin' kind Any man of mine

Let me hear you say yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah I like it that way

Any man of mine better walk the line Better show me a teasin' squeezin' pleasin' kinda time I need a man who knows, how the story goes He's gotta be a heartbeatin' fine treatin' Breathtakin' earthquakin' kind Any man of mine

You gotta shimmy shake Make the earth quake Kick, turn, stomp, stomp, then you jump Heel to toe, Do Si Do 'Til your boots wanna break "Til your feet and your back ache Keep it movin' 'til you just can't take anymore Come on everybody on the floor A-one two, a-three four Hup two, hum If you wanna be a man of mine, that's right This is what a woman wants...

 

[Alex]

You might want to ask Beyonce about that one.

Kidding aside, I think it's all about the inner qualities a person has that is important, and not necessarily looks. Well, maybe if the girl had ugly feet, then that's a different story. LOL

 

[metalangel]

I agree. I'm not a big fan of disrespectful relationships, but some people don't have a problem with it. I think light sarcasm is OK, but I'd never cross the line to calling my partner offensive names, it's just not right.

It might be a British thing, they're not the only ones I know, and it's playful disrespect. Then again, I'd never seen quite so many couples shrieking at each other in genuine anger out on the street until I moved here.

 

[SneakerNet]

I think I created on the post before and reading all of your post above, let me ask you this...to allow to think about yourself. Talking about your mind.. your mentality. The way it developed from birth.
So, about physical attraction, if you saw a person (male or female doesn't matter) and you instantly locked on this person, and your heart pumped and your feeling wanting to date her... (pressing pause button) What causing this person instantly attracted to him/her?

(there will be more after this questions)

 

[Irish]

How about I pick a guy that is both attractive and has a good personality? It's important to me to be both physically and emotionally attracted to someone if I am to start dating or enter a relationship. I will not pick an ugly guy with a good personality or an attractive guy with a bad personality. That'd just be a waste of everyone's time.

I know you might enjoy asking philosophical questions like that, but usually these questions aren't quite realistic. It's not an "either or" situation like someone pointed out earlier. Usually there are plenty of other choices/decisions to make and factors to take into consideration.

 

[Marie579]

Personality can make someone attractive, if you get to know someone, where you thought they weren't attractive at first, they become attractive after knowing them. And the same is true in reverse, someone's personality can make them ugly, thinking they are nice looking, but after knowing them, they repulse you. I've only went out with a few guys on their looks and it ended badly or at least in a lesson learned lol, and I learned to date for attraction to personality only, of course now I'm married and I don't have to worry about those things. Good luck!!!!

 

[Steinhauer]

ωhα† ïƒ ψ⊕u mαrrïεd †hε h⊕††εš† šp⊕ušε ⊕η †hε pιαηε†, ε∀εrψ†hïηg ωαš ƒαη†αš†ïς, ïηςιudïηg ψ⊕ur šεx ιïƒε?

†hεη, ⊕ηε dαψ, ψ⊕u ß⊕†h gε† ïη α h⊕rrïßιε ςαr αςςïdεη†, αηd ψ⊕ur šp⊕ušε'š ß⊕dψ ïš ς⊕∀εrεd ïη 3rd dεgrεε ßurηš?

m⊕η†hš ια†εr, ჆εr muςh hεαιïηg, ψ⊕ur šp⊕ušε gεηε†αιïα ωαš š⊕ dαmαgεd ïη †hε ƒïrε †hα† ï† d⊕εš η⊕† šεxuαιιψ ƒuης†ï⊕η ...

тнê вuяnS нêål, вuт Scåя тlSSuê cоvêяS 98% оf yоuя SpоuSê'S воDy ...

wЇ∠∠ yΘυ ∠∃Æ¥∃ τΗ∃m?

(I wouldn't - I based my marriage on love and promised my wife's family to love her till the day I die - beauty is fleeting - better base your relationship on something a bit more solid IMHO)).

 

[ambrosia]

What if a frog had wings? It wouldn't bump it's ass when it hopped. That's what my mom always said when I asked her "what if". Nobody's talking about basing their relationship on attractiveness or sex.

 

[soulchill]

 

[VacationGuy234]

It might be a British thing, they're not the only ones I know, and it's playful disrespect. Then again, I'd never seen quite so many couples shrieking at each other in genuine anger out on the street until I moved here.

I have friends who go at it like cats and dogs and they are still together while other couples have divorced. It makes me uneasy sometimes. I believe it is rare that two people can be OK with it without one of then getting hurt at some point, but it does exist.

 

[dereksbicycles]

I have friends who go at it like cats and dogs and they are still together while other couples have divorced. It makes me uneasy sometimes. I believe it is rare that two people can be OK with it without one of then getting hurt at some point, but it does exist.

For how long have they been together for?

As to the OP's question, it does not really matter about look and personality. If you find someone, then you can figure how to work things out. See, I don't need to lose weight, but my girlfriend does have to. I get curious about best ways to lose weight because of my girlfriend. I would not look them up if it was just me. So, it's not just personality and look. As you dive deeper and deeper in a relationship, you will see. I've been with my girlfriend for a little more than 1.5 years. Those who are or were in a long term relationship will understand what I am talking about.

 

[CrazyPaul]

Nothing is predictable. For example. you marry someone with a good personality, then a few years later your spouse gets arrested for stealing alot of money from his/her employer. "I can't believe that my husband/wife did that." Another example: serial killer BTK - his family was shocked, even though he had a good personality with his wife. People with good personality can be tricky. It actually happens everywhere. So be careful when you find someone new with a good personality.

 

[caz12]

i met this guy once good looking kind and rich everything you want from a guy,then he told me the the clincher he was woman awaiting for surgery,i am one those people no hang ups but i just could't go for that relationship he was italian..the full package apart from important package.part of me shamed i felt like that but time gone on i still could not go for it but i would encourage another person not be shallow like i was,but a penis do help

 

[Marie579]

You should just pay attention to what a person is and what they are telling you and if it makes sense to what they are and if they have family around them that ignores them or loves them, sometimes the signs are there, not always, but sometimes.

 

[Marie579]

ωhα† ïƒ ψ⊕u mαrrïεd †hε h⊕††εš† šp⊕ušε ⊕η †hε pιαηε†, ε∀εrψ†hïηg ωαš ƒαη†αš†ïς, ïηςιudïηg ψ⊕ur šεx ιïƒε?

†hεη, ⊕ηε dαψ, ψ⊕u ß⊕†h gε† ïη α h⊕rrïßιε ςαr αςςïdεη†, αηd ψ⊕ur šp⊕ušε'š ß⊕dψ ïš ς⊕∀εrεd ïη 3rd dεgrεε ßurηš?

m⊕η†hš ια†εr, ჆εr muςh hεαιïηg, ψ⊕ur šp⊕ušε gεηε†αιïα ωαš š⊕ dαmαgεd ïη †hε ƒïrε †hα† ï† d⊕εš η⊕† šεxuαιιψ ƒuης†ï⊕η ...

тнê вuяnS нêål, вuт Scåя тlSSuê cоvêяS 98% оf yоuя SpоuSê'S воDy ...

wЇ∠∠ yΘυ ∠∃Æ¥∃ τΗ∃m?

(I wouldn't - I based my marriage on love and promised my wife's family to love her till the day I die - beauty is fleeting - better base your relationship on something a bit more solid IMHO)).

I would take care of him, love him and never ever leave him, I love him, for better or worse , in sickness and health, til death do us part. And death only parts us, I'd still love his dumb butt!!! He wouldn't repulse me, and we'd figure things out...but I've loved him since I was 14, so I can say that, I'm almost 40 now.

 

[Reba]

I would take care of him, love him and never ever leave him, I love him, for better or worse , in sickness and health, til death do us part. And death only parts us, I'd still love his dumb butt!!! He wouldn't repulse me, and we'd figure things out...but I've loved him since I was 14, so I can say that, I'm almost 40 now.

Yes. Many military spouses have already experienced this with their wounded warriors. Many others who have ill or injured spouses from many causes continue to love them.

When my son-in-law had his leg amputated last year after a terrible accident at work, my daughter told me, "Yes, this is tough to go thru but I love *****, and he is not just body parts."

I also know several spouses who spend years taking care of their loved ones who are disabled by Alzheimer's or brain injury. They don't even have the pleasure of sharing their loved ones' personalities, much less their bodies. Yet, they still love and care for them.

There is more to love than the physical or the personality.