Why is it that relationships with age gaps seem to spark such fear in people?

For this reason, I will only date women close to my age. Ill be friends with any nice adult however.
 
My rule of thumb is anybody in the same age group as my parents/grandparents are a big no-no.

Same for younger age bracket the same distance I am from my parents/grandparents are out of limits as well too.

Its kinda revolting in my opinion to be dating your mother/father's friend or whatever.
 
I have friends the had big age gaps when they dated .The wife was 23 and and the husband was 37 . They were married 31 years , the husband dies a few years ago. He was my friend and he told me when when he got married he told his wife that he will try his best to keep up with her and that she will have to slow down when he get to tried! I think there is nothing wrong with going with some older than you, and the worst part one will dies sooner.
My friend was 73 when he dies and his wife was in her 50's .
 
I'm 68 and my GF is 37. We've been together for six years (we think...one day it occurred to us that we were a couple, but didn't know when it happened). We've never had the comments, but can tell from the side-ways looks on some faces what they're thinking! We find it amusing. We're going to get t-shirts that say "She's not my daughter" and "He's not my dad". Perhaps mature women see the young lady as "stealing" a man from their age group, and both sexes cannot understand what we could get from the other. My money/her sexuality are plausible answers, but wrong.
 
I say who cares about age, as long as its legal, do what makes you happy and screw what other people think
 
What is the physical effect of ongoing "aging" past say 50?

Wonder if some of the above are able to answer today on their thoughts since 2009?
 
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I have a man 14 years older than me, we LOVE each other very much.

Age is just a number, if there is chemistry/spark/immediate love then let it be. I am VERY happy with him and vice versa.
 
I am in my 40s, and I have dated someone as young as 23. I PREFER younger women just because they still have that spirit. I'm basically a teenager inside. I prefer someone who is at least 25 because those who are younger sometimes have a tendency to say, "Okay, I'm having problems. I'm breaking up with you, I'm giving away my pets, and I'm breaking up with all my friends and leaving town." So abrupt without thinking of the consequences of their actions from OTHER people's perspectives. I want them to walkabout a bit before dating them.

My Dad was my stepmother's senior by 17 years. She is basically the same age as my half-siblings (they are in their 70s). One time, Dad was married to a woman who was less than half his age! She was about 25, and Dad was in his late 50s at the time.

So, no big deal - oh, and my stepsister, who is in her 50s, lost her husband within the last year. He was past 80, that I know, and they were married for over 20 years.
 
One set of my grandparents had a 15 year age difference between them. No big deal. He was in his thirties and she was in her twenties.

A male friend of mine married a woman 7 years older than him. Seems unusual, but no big deal either. They click very well and hurried to have two children before she turned 40.

Age is a number.
 
~*Kaelei*~ said:
My parents don't get along with him, when they first found out that I'm dating a man who's 16 years older than me, they freaked out....

<snip>

As months went on, my parents keep putting negative comments down on to me, saying how it won't work, how the age difference is too great and so on. ... packed up, moved up to Alaska and I cut all the ties with my family, refusing to talk to them.

After three years without talking to them and We moved back to Washington about a year ago, my Dad found out and he tried to talk to me, trying to make amends. He's willing to start over and get to know Preston better, to see what I see about my husband.

My Husband's parents are another story.... They loved me from the first moment they met me and they approve the relationship. I have tight relationship with them and I'm really close with them. They accept our relationship, in fact they support it. They're glad that I make their son happy and that's what they care about.
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Sometimes, tough love is needed. I've had to do that for very different reasons, and I wasn't even wanted at my Dad's memorial unless I agreed to certain things, which prompted the cutoff. (it had nothing to do with dating someone much younger) Dear, sometimes you'll find out that water IS thicker than blood... It was several years later that the family finally came around, but not before my brother-in-law died. THEN, they invited me to his memorial, which I did go to.

My Mom did the same thing to her Mom when she was complaining about my Dad being Indian and Texan during the Thanksgiving visit in Philadelphia. Mom packed up the bags and told Dad, "Let's go." Mom never saw her again alive, as she died a month later.

Mom's side of the family, as well as a half-relative line next to them, are very open and welcoming to me, even though I have seen them only twice in my life (I've been going up there the last two summers and will go up there again to visit). I am considering moving there to leave behind the family situation here in Texas, which is basically they almost NEVER visit me. I have to visit them. Once in a while, my stepmother visits (make that once a year, I believe), but nobody else in her family visits me, even my stepsister who was living right here in the city for a couple of years. One time, I got an email from her about some real estate business deal (she's in real estate), and I replied back, "That was what the email was about? I thought you were saying hi and wanted to see about getting together." She never replied back. It's more like the tolerate me rather accept me.
 
DeafBadger said:
Age is a number.
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That begs the question - what was it like for the First Generation of humans, and the next thousand generations before they figured out a calendar year and started placing age restrictions on themselves? What was it like if you didn't have language, tools, nor science yet? Did it really matter?
 
Grummer said:
LOL at novemeber gypsy and Shel90, yah, geees me even I am guilty of 'what's shes older than you too ? two years!
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How about THIS??? What if I was 19, and she was 15, but only two grades apart?

The problem is THIS. Society has built in some crazy hang-ups about sex and age. If you know about the Ori in Stargate, that is the problem we have, except that the "Ori" are our own people who grew up physically just like the rest of us did.

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The Ori (play /ˈɒraɪ/)[1] are fictional characters in the science fiction television series, Stargate SG-1. They are a group of "ascended" beings who use their advanced technology and knowledge of the universe to attempt to trick non-ascended humans into worshipping them as gods.
------------------

"Hallowed are the Ori..." Indeed!

That was from wikipedia, by the way. It's like the message I'm getting in Houston is, "Stephanie, we are out to GET YOU!! We're going to take away your friends by getting them into church, and they're either have you go to church with them, or you'll lose them! Ha ha ha... Yee eeee ehehehe ah ah ah ah HAHAHAHA!!! Eventually, you'll have no friends left in Texas. We're gonna get you one day... You'll be like the rest of us! Resistance is futile, prepare to be CONVERTED!!" The Modern Inquisition, as it were... I have these people, seemingly nice people stop by twice or thrice a year and knock on my door, wanting to talk about Jesus and God. I say that I'm not interested and that I am cavewoman, please leave me be and have a good day (because it goes NOWHERE!!!). What is strange is that all the people in my family mentioned here live/lived here in Texas at the time of marriage and lived here the whole time. In fact, it was accepted! I guess different parts of the country have their hangups. We have hangups here about eating dogs and cats, and people in India have hangups about eating cows, etc. People in Texas usually have hangups about anyone not being Christian or being cavewoman.
 
Maria said:
I mean, if you are a woman at the age of 47, goin' to be 48 soon and your man is 22. Will it affect your perspective and opinions ? Or doesn't it really matter ? Just curious. I would like to know from other ADers for their opinions as well.
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I've been in that situation before, except that it was with a woman still going to college. She was more mature than I! :shock: For as long as it lasted, it didn't really matter. I'm very young-minded because of how I grew up in the first years of childhood.

But now, I'll speak as someone looking into a couple's relationship in which the woman is much older than the man, and I can see a few feet away that there is SOMETHING GOING ON between them, if you KNOW WHAT I MEAN!... :naughty:

I'm like, "Damn, she must be HOT!! She sure likes 'em YOUNG! Teaches them FORBIDDEN THINGS." And then I laugh at myself when I remember I was in a similar age situation. I've been in such a relationship twice.
 
I'm 29, my husband is 40. I married him when I was 20. I had people, friends (even my best friends...) and my family on my butt, warned me. They teased that our marriage will not last any longer. Well, we are still going on for 10 years with three children.

People don't like it? Ehhh, who cares.
 
If age is just a "number" what happens as we get "older"? No difference physical wise from 20 to 80?
 
drphil said:
If age is just a "number" what happens as we get "older"? No difference physical wise from 20 to 80?
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Sure, the aging process is real.

But when it is said that "age is just a number," when it comes to romance, it means that when people are in love, age doesn't matter. It doesn't mean that aging doesn't happen. It just means it doesn't matter in love.
 
Pinto2020 said:
I'm 29, my husband is 40. I married him when I was 20. I had people, friends (even my best friends...) and my family on my butt, warned me. They teased that our marriage will not last any longer. Well, we are still going on for 10 years with three children.

People don't like it? Ehhh, who cares.
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I agreed. My wife and I are 13 years apart. We love each other so much.
 
n "interesting" question- what happens to "love" when the physical effects occur-say extreme weakened muscles or relevance here-DEAFness over a weekend?
Only "love counts"?
 
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