Why does this happen?

Steinhauer

Steinhauer

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Ok, a trend I have noticed ever since VP's have become commonplace, is that when a deaf couple is having an argument, they immediately want a VP audience to watch their argument.

Ok .... arguing is normal. What I do not find normal, is a trend for a couple to want voyeurs to their argument.

What is up with that? I am not talking about the educated deaf, I am talking about the grassroots deafie deafs. Its like .... Jerry Springer influenced entertainment or something.

Anyone else been a victim of this?

This situation has happened to me on a number of occassions. The conversation usually goes like this:

Me: "Hey, how ya doing?"

anon #1 : "That G-d$%^& motherf^^^ing bastard did it again! LOOK - RIGHT THERE!"

Me: "Um ... why do you think this is my business?"

anon #2 : "SEE! You are bothering him .... Now you witness this b_tch do this all time"

(both successfully dragged me into it)

Me: "I can't help you, sorry, call me back when you both calm down"

Anon #1 & 2 continue arguing

Me: "Bye ..... ... "
 
Trying to enlist allies. It happens everywhere, not just deaf.
 
Glenn said:
Trying to enlist allies. It happens everywhere, not just deaf.
Click to expand...

I think I found the "hearing" alternative:

When Couples Fight on Facebook, Everyone Knows the Score - NYTimes.com


All I am saying is that ever since VP's have become common, this type of behaviour has increased within the deaf community. VP's are being used (not always) much the same way Facebook is used in the above linked article.

Except .. it happens live, and usually, the victim is dragged right into it kicking and screaming.

Resistance is futile.
 
You're not the victim. That implies you had no control over what happened.

Just leave the situation. Simple as that. It happens because people participate. You can choose to participate or walk away.
 
Glenn said:
You're not the victim. That implies you had no control over what happened.

Just leave the situation. Simple as that. It happens because people participate. You can choose to participate or walk away.
Click to expand...

I have always chosen to hang up.

Then I get called every 5 minutes. I ignore the call. Then a roommate answers the phone and I am like "NOOOOOOOOOOO!"

Just when I got out .... they drag me back in!

Never fails.
 
Use discretion in choosing friends and giving your phone number out.

That is way more drama than I would ever tolerate. I used to have friends who were like that, but decided long ago it simply was not worth any of it.
 
These are not people I deem "friends". They are "friends of friends". With the close knit deaf community in these parts, everyone knows everyone else.

I can understand some of the calls. For example, one caller was someone I deemed a "friend" that wanted me to witness what his hearing roommates were doing to him. I advised him to call 911. When the police got there, I told him to tell the officer to call his VP with his cell phone so he would have the convo interpreted right there in his room. It took the officer several minutes to figure out what was going on, but once he made the call and saw that the convo was being interpreted, my friend was able to explain with clarity what was going on.

That ... I can understand.

However, I have "recently" been getting calls from people I barely know, and are friends of my roommates. There are specific couples that tend to want to argue publicly via VP. That is what I do not get. It seems that these couples want as many people involved as possible.

What motivates this? And yes, it is much more drama than I am willing to tolerate. However, it does seem to be an increasing trend. It used to be rare.

edit to add: I also suggested ... several times ... that 911 needed to be called to dissolve a volatile situation. The answer I would often receive was "Nah ... I don't want to do that, I don't want to get the police involved" to which I replied, "So why the hell are you calling me? I can't help you".

I don't understand the motivation for this.
 
posts from hell said:
Never seen such thing.
Click to expand...

It happens. Just not "all the time". Takes 2 very specific personalities interacting in a specific way. Most people don't seek out audiences to their arguments, whether they are deaf or hearing.
 
jillio said:
It happens. Just not "all the time". Takes 2 very specific personalities interacting in a specific way. Most people don't seek out audiences to their arguments, whether they are deaf or hearing.
Click to expand...

Like PFH, I haven't seen this. I don't care much for drama which is why I loathe reality shows.
 
Glenn said:
You're not the victim. That implies you had no control over what happened.

Just leave the situation. Simple as that. It happens because people participate. You can choose to participate or walk away.
Click to expand...

You always have a choice, and every choice has a consequence.
 
I haven't either, but that is because I distance myself from these kinds of situations.
 
Glenn said:
I haven't either, but that is because I distance myself from these kinds of situations.
Click to expand...

Exactly. Those of you who have never seen something like this simply choose not to participate in things like this. Those that see it all the time are generally right in the middle of it enjoying the drama.
 
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