Racial identity is different from a person's ancestory. I look white (very pale), and I identify as a white person. That's the culture in which I grew up. If you were too "trashy," you weren't "white." Whatever those things mean?!? My family was insecure as poor, white people. Race and class intersect.
Wanting to know about ancestry is normal. Finding out that I had a NA ancestor does not make me NA. It does give me an appreciation of how race affects our families and society.
It makes me sad that my ancestor married a white man and pretended like she wasn't NA. Like Berry mentioned, I believe that the official records are incorrect. I can have appreciation for my ancestor though. She must have been a strong woman to survive on a farm in Oklahoma and rear a large brood of kids. All women are left out of the history texts. Sometimes, we need to "resurrect" women and give them their rightful respect and honor.
I got interested in researching my family's genealogy mostly because there was so little information - and lots of secrets. Want to find out a bunch of stuff? Go to a family funeral or wedding. Secrets and gossip!
My Dad never talks about family past - and it's fraught with "stories" that seem made up. I know many family names got changed at Ellis Island - but I never got a straight story of why my Dad's name is spelled different from his family's.
Found out my grandmother on my mother's side had 10 kids - but 3 of them have a different father. Try finding that in the birth records or census records. Nope.
And the denial of things! My father's family comes from Germany - but DARE mention any Jewish ancestry - wrong move. On my mother's side, I only heard whispers "of course he drank heavily - like all indians". Geesh.
Still, I find it interesting. I'm who I am no matter what, but I find it all fascinating.
Secrets, secrets. On all sides.
Many Jewish people, Irish too, and others, kept their true blood lines a secret. And why not? When you escape persecution in one place you don't seek it out in another.
My mother never revealed herself to outsiders as "Indian": she always claimed what was tolerated, be it Italian, French, whatever. She was a Free Jack. She could pass for almost anything and did.
And the culture you identify with -- and why.
An ancestor of mine, several greats back, was kidnapped by some whites and sold on the slave block in the south. After a few years she came wandering back into the tribe. She knew the way, but she was weak, and talked two big strong black slaves into escaping with her -- Promising them membership in the tribe, which I understand was no problem at the time.
What is not talked about is that she was traveling, and in hiding, with these two men for months, maybe a year or more.
How much you wanna bet one of them is my great great great grand pa?
I have some white cultural aspects, though I don't identify as white, and I definitely have some NA cultural aspects as many of my beliefs are based on those I was raised with. Now my best friend was CODA so you can toss some Deaf Cultural identity in there too. I also had an honorary aunt an uncle who were Irish, complete with brogue. So toss in a dab of the old sod.
But I also share some Black cultural aspects and identity, and not just because when I was young I lived in a predominantly Black neighborhood. Not just because this is where I learned to dance and play pool and hang out, but because one of my ancestors was a slave too.
Gives a guy pause for thought, and a slightly different slant on the world.