What Ticks You Off (Most) About The Deaf Culture?

[JClarke]

Jclarke, that is exactly right. It becomes a habit and it is like a book that is really hard to put down and just want to finish at the end of the story. I have been there and done that. Uh, Jollie_77, I understand your frustration when you need to hurry to do what you have to do. You will just have to tell them that you are leaving and got to run for something that you need to do. But the deaf friends will still stay around to chat some more and that is the Deaf way which is part of Deaf Culture. I hope you understand what I am saying here.

Excatly another metaphor

 

[deafbajagal]

Maybe it is just me...but don't some of your deaf people talk way too much about personal things? Such as details of their bowel movements? "Oh, man. That was a good poop I just had...I feel so better once it passed through my rectum!" Details of their sex (or sexless) lives? And some ask personal questions like - "So - did you two have sex on your date?" "How much money do you make?"

I think there's a fine line between being culturally deaf whereas things are open & straightforward - and just plain rudeness.

 

[JClarke]

Maybe it is just me...but don't some of your deaf people talk way too much about personal things? Such as details of their bowel movements? "Oh, man. That was a good poop I just had...I feel so better once it passed through my rectum!" Details of their sex (or sexless) lives? And some ask personal questions like - "So - did you two have sex on your date?" "How much money do you make?"

I think there's a fine line between being culturally deaf whereas things are open & straightforward - and just plain rudeness.

That's excatly the same thing to a deaf guy in my area and the whole deaf community hates him. Too much talking!!

 

[Buffalo]

Looks like the biggest peeve for you regarding deaf culture is also the biggest peeve many deaf have with hearing culture. Guess there is ethnocentricsim everywhere!

Yes, ethnocentricism is everywhere... even in Deaf Culture.

I know about DST and gossiping. Gossiping is rampant because of small local community of Deaf people. I am sure it is the same in a real small town.

What ticks me off about the Deaf Culture is their immaturity/irresponsibility. They tend to be "fashionably late". I find that they prefer to play than to get serious about something more important. I often wonder why they are like that. Was it Deaf Culture or the result of the years of the way the hearing people treating us like kids. Either that or I am way too serious. Jillio, what is your opinion??

 

[VamPyroX]

I know a lot of people who are HOH and are strongly involved with the deaf community. I think it's a relevant concern that you brought up because that does seem to happen in some places.

Yes, it usually depends on where I am.

At RIT/NTID, it's half-half.

In some places, I'm ignored because I'm not deaf enough. In some places, I'm accepted.

The ones who accept me lightly are the ones who take things seriously. The ones who don't take me lightly are the ones who think I'm trying to push hearing ideals on them.

 

[VamPyroX]

Maybe it is just me...but don't some of your deaf people talk way too much about personal things? Such as details of their bowel movements? "Oh, man. That was a good poop I just had...I feel so better once it passed through my rectum!" Details of their sex (or sexless) lives? And some ask personal questions like - "So - did you two have sex on your date?" "How much money do you make?"

I think there's a fine line between being culturally deaf whereas things are open & straightforward - and just plain rudeness.

That rarely happens around me, but I have noticed that they "talk too much" on other things.

For instance, if we're in a meeting and discussing something... they will repeat everything.

It's more appropriate to bring up something that hasn't been brought up yet. If there was a discussion on a proposal and people were discussing PROs and CONs, then we only need to hear something new once. If what you want to say is what someone else already said, then there's no need to say it. However, in a deaf meeting... everyone has to... I mean... HAS TOO... say something even if it's already been said before.

Proposal: I move for the club to pay $100 for more paper.
Speaker: Let's make a PROs & CONs list.
Person 1: I agree because we have 100 sheets left.
Person 2: I disagree because we have 10 weeks left and only use an average of 5 sheets a week. We have enough.
Person 3: I agree because we are running out of paper.
Person 4: I agree with Person 1 because we have 100 sheets left.
Person 5: I disagree because we usually do our printouts at the computer lab and their printing is free.
Person 6: I agree because we need more supplies.
Person 7: I think we should pass this proposal because 4 people stated 4 good PROs.
Person 8: *thinking the same as Person 2* *says nothing*
Person 9: Since we have 5 PROs and 2 CONs, it's obvious that the PROs outweight the CONs. Let's close this discussion and vote!

Notice that Person 2, Person 5, and Person 8 did it the right way? Unfortunately, the motion was passed because the deaf members considered 5 statements as 5 separate PROs and felt that it was worth spending $100 on more paper.

Oh yeah, did I mention... this group went broke and had no more money for the rest of the year? The year ended and they hadn't even touched any of the paper they bought. :roll:

I've worked at a Parliamentarian for a group before and have often had people ignore me because I was doing it the wrong way. They believed they were doing it the right way because a videotape told them so. Unfortunately, I saw the videotape and they misunderstood the video.

 

[VamPyroX]

Yes, ethnocentricism is everywhere... even in Deaf Culture.

I know about DST and gossiping. Gossiping is rampant because of small local community of Deaf people. I am sure it is the same in a real small town.

What ticks me off about the Deaf Culture is their immaturity/irresponsibility. They tend to be "fashionably late". I find that they prefer to play than to get serious about something more important. I often wonder why they are like that. Was it Deaf Culture or the result of the years of the way the hearing people treating us like kids. Either that or I am way too serious. Jillio, what is your opinion??

I deal with DST and gossip all the time at RIT/NTID.

A lot of them think that DST is "cool" and often compete to make DST worse and worse.

When I first came to RIT, DST was considered 5 to 10 minutes after the appointed time. As the years went by, DST got later and later. At one point, DST was 30 minutes later.

That was why a lot of events had a difficult time succeeding because deaf students were showing up late. In order to ensure that everyone had a good time, the events had to be planned as 3 to 4 hours long instead of the usual 2 hours.

As for gossip, that's something that's always messed up.

There's a difference between rumor and gossip. Rumor is usually something that is to be confirmed. Gossip is usually something that is based on a fact and is often done as a method of harming another's reputation.

For instance, this guy is no longer working at the computer lab. No one knows why he's not there. Some think it's cuz he was fired. Well, I would like to confirm if that's true. So, I ask an appropriate person... "I heard that he was fired from his job. What's up with that?" Notice how I said... "I HEARD..."? I'm just saying what I heard. It could be true or it could be false. It's something that can be confirmed by someone else. However, someone else doesn't know it's true... but passes the news around in a gossip manner. "Did you know he got fired from his job?" Yep, "DID YOU KNOW..." is a way of saying that it did happen. Now, if a deaf person hears it as "I HEARD..." but passes it on as "DID YOU KNOW...", then the harm has now been done.

That's why I usually keep rumors and gossip to myself unless I absolutely trust the person enough to have common sense to know the difference between I HEARD and DID YOU KNOW.

 

[CCfan]

It ticked me off that my favorite TV programming or DVD aren't not captioned, anyone in family didn't interpreter too much.

 

[jillio]

Yes, ethnocentricism is everywhere... even in Deaf Culture.

I know about DST and gossiping. Gossiping is rampant because of small local community of Deaf people. I am sure it is the same in a real small town.

What ticks me off about the Deaf Culture is their immaturity/irresponsibility. They tend to be "fashionably late". I find that they prefer to play than to get serious about something more important. I often wonder why they are like that. Was it Deaf Culture or the result of the years of the way the hearing people treating us like kids. Either that or I am way too serious. Jillio, what is your opinion??

Well, that "fashionably late" thing does seem to be prevalent in Deaf Culture. And since cultural values are passed from one generation from another, it could very well be that the older deaf developed the practice of controlling what time they arrived to counteract the fact that control over their language and other aspects of their lives was taken away from them. Then that practice was passed from generation to generation until it has become a value of the culture. That is a very insightful proposition, Buffalo.

 

[CCfan]

Wow! I agree with you 100%, I'm glad I'm not alone in this, same here I have a hard time mingling with the deaf world also because I sign SEE most of the time, and I never attended school for the deaf, so to them, I'm not deaf enough but, however I think we should be thankful that we know sign language no matter whether its ASL/SEE/PSE, I don't understand why do we have to be like everyone else?

I happened with my SEE during I went in summer deaf school. I had problem with deaf school, because they not understand what I signing. But not deaf community because I haven't involved in deaf community yet.

I tried to signing with my mother, and sometimes she didn't understand what
I saying. That sometimes it make me frustrated that she has complicated
with my own ASL language. So I explained to her again, so she would understand what I said. That is problem solved. It make me happy to be satisfied with communicate to her.

 

[deafbajagal]

For instance, if we're in a meeting and discussing something... they will repeat everything.

VamPyroX, I never thought about it before - but you're totally right! This happens to me when I'm in one of those godforsaken meetings with deaf people- they would spend a good four hours discussing things - over and over again. I don't bother going or participating in those meetings anymore because I was starting to go bats.

 

[AquaBlue]

I am so glad I created this thread and the other one about hearies. Both are so insightful.

 

[Chase]

A lot of them think that DST is "cool" and often compete to make DST worse and worse.

When I first came to RIT, DST was considered 5 to 10 minutes after the appointed time. As the years went by, DST got later and later. At one point, DST was 30 minutes later.

That was why a lot of events had a difficult time succeeding because deaf students were showing up late. In order to ensure that everyone had a good time, the events had to be planned as 3 to 4 hours long instead of the usual 2 hours.

I taught at three Montana colleges near native reservations where it's culturally cool to be late. Many professors found what you said, VamPyroX, that if you waited 10 minutes to begin, then some came 15 minutes late and so on until half the class period was eaten up by students straggling in.

Many teachers put in their syllabi that classfroom doors will be locked a certain number of minutes after class had begun. The tribes paid educational stipends based on attendance, so the late ones lost money. I didn't lock doors, but I sent the sign-in sheet to the office 10 minutes into class. Too late was too bad.

Lots of other ideas can reward promptness, like drawing door prizes at meetings after 10 minutes or so.

 

[rockdrummer]

Firslty, please expand on what your definition of "The deaf culture" is. Then I might be able to better answer the question

 

[VamPyroX]

I taught at three Montana colleges near native reservations where it's culturally cool to be late. Many professors found what you said, VamPyroX, that if you waited 10 minutes to begin, then some came 15 minutes late and so on until half the class period was eaten up by students straggling in.

Many teachers put in their syllabi that classfroom doors will be locked a certain number of minutes after class had begun. The tribes paid educational stipends based on attendance, so the late ones lost money. I didn't lock doors, but I sent the sign-in sheet to the office 10 minutes into class. Too late was too bad.

Lots of other ideas can reward promptness, like drawing door prizes at meetings after 10 minutes or so.

Some professors at RIT do the same thing.

One professor said, "If you're going to be 5 minutes late, don't bother coming at all."

Even interpreters had similar problems. It was usually 10 minutes of waiting before they leave, but some students would show up 11 to 12 minutes later. So, interpreters changed their waiting time to 15 minutes. Again, students showed up 16 to 17 minutes later. The last couple years I was at RIT, the interpreters had to wait 20 minutes. Of course, there would be a few stubborn interpreters who say "10 minutes or I'm gone." cuz they take their jobs seriously.

 

[Jolie77]

Uh, Jollie_77, I understand your frustration when you need to hurry to do what you have to do. You will just have to tell them that you are leaving and got to run for something that you need to do. But the deaf friends will still stay around to chat some more and that is the Deaf way which is part of Deaf Culture. I hope you understand what I am saying here.

It's not a problem. I totally understand what you're getting at. I'm not trying to be prude or anything like that. I even am guilty at some point by extending my stay much longer after the event/gathering ends. I just find it ironic because when someone says "I have to leave now" and yet, I still see that same person in that same spot an hour later.

Granted, I do sometime get myself so immersed into a conversation to a point where time has already passed. By then, I'd realize that I'm supposed to go to somewhere else.

 

[Byrdie714]

Some professors at RIT do the same thing.

One professor said, "If you're going to be 5 minutes late, don't bother coming at all."

Even interpreters had similar problems. It was usually 10 minutes of waiting before they leave, but some students would show up 11 to 12 minutes later. So, interpreters changed their waiting time to 15 minutes. Again, students showed up 16 to 17 minutes later. The last couple years I was at RIT, the interpreters had to wait 20 minutes. Of course, there would be a few stubborn interpreters who say "10 minutes or I'm gone." cuz they take their jobs seriously.

I had a professor that told me the same thing.

I told him in front of the entire class, "Who is providing you with a paycheck?"

 

[JClarke]

I had a professor that told me the same thing.

I told him in front of the entire class, "Who is providing you with a paycheck?"

I bet that'll shut the professor up

 

[Chase]

I had a professor that told me the same thing.

I told him in front of the entire class, "Who is providing you with a paycheck?"

Had just that thing happen more than once. I answered, "All students--not just the few who disrupt. Many here tell me and other faculty they appreciate classes starting on time and limiting disturbances."

Every time I got applause from serious students who wanted their money's worth.

 

[VamPyroX]

I had a professor that told me the same thing.

I told him in front of the entire class, "Who is providing you with a paycheck?"

Yes, but remember... it's not just him getting a paycheck. It's the students getting their education. The students paid to get an education, not to be disturbed by a student showing up for class late.

I've had classes where students would show up late and they walk in front of the whole class to get to their seat. It's noisy, distracting, and bothersome. I'm there to watch the teacher, not to watch some kid walking in without respect and making noises.