What is it like to be hearing?

[Hear Again]

Could you please clarify? Recruitment to what? I guess maybe since I don't know that means, then no, I don't have the "condition" you speak of.
All I can think of is that perhaps the government rewards companies to enlist the impaired for a tax advantage. Is that what you mean?

Recruitment is when a d/Deaf or HoH person experiences pain when hearing normal sounds. They may also perceive normal sounds as being too loud.

After checking the website below, I learned that people with normal hearing cannot have recruitment:

Recruitment from Hearing Loss

 

[heariepaul]

Recruitment is when a d/Deaf or HoH person experiences pain when hearing normal sounds. They may also perceive normal sounds as being too loud.

After checking the website below, I learned that people with normal hearing cannot have recruitment:

Recruitment from Hearing Loss

Thank you very much. That was an interesting article. No, I don't have that condition, but I now am more sensitive to it and will take that into consideration in talking to someone with that condition.

 

[aglaeca]

You may be surprised at the number of hearing people that crave true solitude because, although certain sounds can be 'tuned out' the ears do actually stay on. The sensitivity varies from person to person.

This is a huge reason I moved out to the country. In an apartment you often hear all of your neighbors' conversations. I guess a good analogy would be to imagine that the people around you were running up to you without warning and signing right in your face. When I have to leave the woods I spend a lot of time with headphones on, just to drown out the ambient noise. I don't mind being hearing when I can have my solitude, and when silence is a choice, but in the city it can be a curse.

I have a friend who's a synesthete (experiences one sense as overlapping with another), and she sees swirls of color that move and change shape when she hears music. It's not like watching something on a screen; it's always in front of her when music is on. We hearies experience music no matter which direction we're facing, whether or not our eyes are open--someone mentioned smell further up the thread, and that's about right. Some music is particularly harsh, like a bright, grating color, or like a handful of chopped garlic, but even that can have its charm if it's done right. Miles Davis' "Bitches Brew" is a mess, but it's a wonderful mess.

I think a lot of the hearie perspective is colored by imagining what it'd be like to not hear music anymore. Me, I look at it as similar to my allergies. I'm allergic to chocolate (chances of that are about one in 500,000, by the way). I never ate chocolate growing up, because the last time I had a chocolate chip cookie (I was three) I ended up in ER. Now if I taste chocolate accidentally (which happens surprisingly often--I carry Benadryl) it tastes horrible to me. Even the smell is horrible. But every time someone finds out I can't eat it, their reaction is pity, which is annoying, and the whole culinary culture surrounding chocolate really just mystifies me.

 

[Jolie77]

I think a lot of the hearie perspective is colored by imagining what it'd be like to not hear music anymore. Me, I look at it as similar to my allergies. I'm allergic to chocolate (chances of that are about one in 500,000, by the way). I never ate chocolate growing up, because the last time I had a chocolate chip cookie (I was three) I ended up in ER. Now if I taste chocolate accidentally (which happens surprisingly often--I carry Benadryl) it tastes horrible to me. Even the smell is horrible. But every time someone finds out I can't eat it, their reaction is pity, which is annoying, and the whole culinary culture surrounding chocolate really just mystifies me.

You know, I find it interesting when you compared the "culture" thing because most of the time, deaf people go through the same thing as you do with the chocolate. We often get comments such as "Oh, I'm so sorry" so and on when we tell them that we are deaf.

It is mystifying, that is for sure. When you were saying about how the pities were given, That struck me and it opened my eyes because I love chocolate and I absolutely can't live without chocolate and now I'm thinking, in a sense I understand why hearing people values music and sounds; For both, chocolate and the sounds are - soothing, satisfying, bitter, sweet, pleasant, so and on.

 

[SimplyMints]

You know, I find it interesting when you compared the "culture" thing because most of the time, deaf people go through the same thing as you do with the chocolate. We often get comments such as "Oh, I'm so sorry" so and on when we tell them that we are deaf.

It is mystifying, that is for sure. When you were saying about how the pities were given, That struck me and it opened my eyes because I love chocolate and I absolutely can't live without chocolate and now I'm thinking, in a sense I understand why hearing people values music and sounds; For both, chocolate and the sounds are - soothing, satisfying, bitter, sweet, pleasant, so and on.

I've long held to the truth that "You like what you eat." This means, if you cease to eat something that tastes delicious but is bad for you, and you begin to eat something that is good for you but tastes bad to you, you will eventually learn to like it if you give it enough time. If in all that time, you never eat what's bad for you, you can try it after your good-for-you food has begun to taste good to you, and certain flavours will come out in the foods you used to eat that are utterly repulsive. Even the smell might cause you to lose your appetite. Your correlation to this with "pity for the deaf" also brings to mind that not only do we pity people for not being able to experience the things that we enjoy, but we don't realise that the things that we enjoy when not experienced may actually be repulsive, even repugnant. I spent between 20 and 30 years of my life with some measure of hearing, and I was immersed in music. I couldn't imagine life without music. I spent tens of thousands of dollars during the last ten years of my hearing trying in vane to save it. When I finally lost my hearing, I was certain I would go completely mad without music. I was sure that within a week, I'd be in a padded cell searching desperately for something hard against which to pound my head. Here it is several months into being totally deaf, and I have yet to lose my sanity. About a week after picking up some usable sound from my hearing aids for the last time, I began a period during which I did miss music to the point where I did all sorts of crazy experiments to try to "hear" music, which ultimately failed. But I got over it! I came up with a perceivable way music could be written for late profoundly/totally deaf people, though such technology is never likely to be developed because it would take human creativity to manually adapt every piece of music that was ever written to this technology. But by that point, it didn't bother me that I couldn't hear the music.

Honestly, there is one piece of music in the whole world that might tempt me to undergo a procedure if its only result would be that I could hear that one, just that one piece of music written by Jeff Burak for an album called Change of Pace. I don't remember the name of the particular song, but it had some sounds of some animals making cute little sounds in the background at times. It was a really sad day for me when I discovered I could no longer hear those animal sounds. I remember the whole track in every detail in my head, but of course I can't write it out here. Somehow, I've been able to finally re-capture that feeling, though, by looking at pictures of small, cute, and baby wild animals in their natural habitats while recalling the music in my head. It's so cheesey, huh, rofl!

 

[aglaeca]

You know, I find it interesting when you compared the "culture" thing because most of the time, deaf people go through the same thing as you do with the chocolate. We often get comments such as "Oh, I'm so sorry" so and on when we tell them that we are deaf.

To be fair, I imagine deafness comes up a little more often There's no real cultural analogue to it, either; we don't have a "chocolate allergy culture" running parallel to mainstream culinary culture, other than maybe in our immediate families, in part because there are so few of us (I've never met anyone else with it) and in part because it comes up so infrequently in comparison. But I'm glad the similarity struck you, too. Anything that increases understanding...

If in all that time, you never eat what's bad for you, you can try it after your good-for-you food has begun to taste good to you, and certain flavours will come out in the foods you used to eat that are utterly repulsive. Even the smell might cause you to lose your appetite. Your correlation to this with "pity for the deaf" also brings to mind that not only do we pity people for not being able to experience the things that we enjoy, but we don't realise that the things that we enjoy when not experienced may actually be repulsive, even repugnant.

If I suddenly found out I could eat chocolate, I can guarantee you I wouldn't run right out and start wolfing down M&Ms. This is why I would never wish hearing on someone who was deaf. It would be frightening, disorienting, nauseating... like an unexpected, repugnant flavor except that you can't turn it off. Losing my hearing would feel like death to me, but for a deaf person losing their deafness would no doubt feel just as horrible.

 

[SimplyMints]

If I suddenly found out I could eat chocolate, I can guarantee you I wouldn't run right out and start wolfing down M&Ms. This is why I would never wish hearing on someone who was deaf. It would be frightening, disorienting, nauseating... like an unexpected, repugnant flavor except that you can't turn it off. Losing my hearing would feel like death to me, but for a deaf person losing their deafness would no doubt feel just as horrible.

Yes, I thought it would be as good as death to me too, hence the $30,000 I blew on trying to save it. Now, I wouldn't take back my hearing if it were offered to me freely. I know that's weird. Big turn around, but I love being deaf. I pity people who have lived to be my age in love with music and have recently lost their hearing, but I think they'll adjust, and most of them will come to enjoy being deaf, and if the entire world population were to be born deaf from this day forward, I don't think they would be missing anything. I think human creativity would adjust, and our entertainment (and survival) needs would be met easily. I'd love the $30k back! That would be awesome!

 

[Hear Again]

Losing my hearing would feel like death to me, but for a deaf person losing their deafness would no doubt feel just as horrible.

I grew up with progressive hearing loss and I felt the same way you do -- especially since I'm totally blind. Imagining what it would be like to be unable to see or hear really frightened me.

However, after I lost my hearing, I learned that it wasn't the end of the world. I learned how to cope using various communication methods and realized that being unable to hear wasn't as scary as I thought it would be. In fact, I found myself enjoying the silence.

I will never forget what a deafblind woman said to me during my training at my local deafblind center. She said that although you think you'll feel a certain way after acquiring a disability (in my case, deafblindness), you might be surprised to learn that you reacted completely differently than you expected. You might also be surprised to learn how well you adapt and accept your disability. She was exactly right. After I lost my hearing, I began to learn sign, use a Braille display for computer use and utilize alternative cooking techniques for the deafblind. I also attended a convention of the AADB (American Association of the Deaf-Blind) where I could meet other deafblind people like myself. Once I learned these skills and associated with other deafblind people, my world began to expand and I no longer felt limited by my deafblindness.

I've been asked by many sighted-hearing people whether or not losing my hearing changed who I am as a person. I always respond by telling them, "Yes. The experience made me a stronger person. Thanks to my deafblindness, I appreciate the small things in life and greatly value the relationships I have with others."

I wouldn't have told you this 10 years ago when I lost my hearing, but I'm glad things turned out the way they did. Long story short, I wouldn't be the person I am today if it weren't for my deafblindness.

 

[tikka]

I tried not to read the replies to this thread yet, I was wanting to give my own account without knowingly repeat other people.


Times that I dislike being able to hear:

When my mother talks to me quietly, I try to lip read because she is almost inaudible sometimes, alongside background noise and my mind being elsewhere. Frustrates me because I have to use a lot of mental processing and entirely halt what I was doing in order to accomodate her chit-chat.

I hate that on the London underground, that through some sections of the system there are very loud and uncomfortable sounds. They are sharp, unpleasant and sometimes last a long time.

When I am trying to concentrate on something, people talking can really drive me nuts, I can't really listen to much music while I work either for similar reasons - Eventually I have enough.

I hate trying to sleep in when I can hear people in my house or neighbourhood, going about their day to day stuff, with no concern about those of us who enjoy a good sleep. Being able to hear every tiny sound, be it a door closing, footsteps, light switches, talking, moving stuff and dogs barking can almost be like a poke in the ribs (softer sounds are like being rocked with the intention to wake you - you know they are there but wish they would just go away).

Times when I find it useful to be able to hear:

When I an too lazy to check for traffic when crossing the road.

When I am on the wrong train and there is an announcement explaining that the train is taking an alternative route.

Watching / listening to lectures, I can continue doing other things such as talking in text on the internet while listening to a lecture.

Some of favourite hearing moments:

I love being wrapped in the sound of someone I love, maybe its their breathing as they sleep, the sound of them laugh, even the comfortable silences.. also certain other private moments I find to be enhanced by the sounds.

Some one singing, especially if its someone I care about singing, it blows me away sometimes and provokes so much emotion, can be too intense to even know what to do with those feelings.

When I create music on the computer, scratch on my turntables or make beats with my mouth.. There is a part of me that has a deep connection to what I perceive as being music.

Hearing an adorable sounding little girl say something so unbelievablly cute that your heart just melts and you want to have one of your very own someday.

Listening to someone doing hypnosis, even when I hear myself do it, I can find it to be such a comforting experience that I will sometimes give in entirely to the urge to space out and feel great for no reason at all.

Today I met 2 of my nephews for the first time and one of them called me Borris, which isn't quite right, lol, my name is Morris. I found it quite funny, it made me reflect on when I was a kid and couldn't stand anyone calling me more Borris.. or Dorris.. Grrrrrr! Kids could be soo mean haha.

 

[tikka]

off topic:

Oh and something that popped into my head was that, about.. 9 years ago I had spent so much time online using text to communicate, barely socializing with anyone vocally and avoiding family as much as possible.. I began to lose the ability so speak fluently, often seeking to find words and experiencing great difficulty while trying to pronounce newer words which I would type frequently because I hadn't yet tried to say them out loud.

 

[tikka]

This part is interesting, As many of you said, there is virtually no way to shut down the noises (if you even wanted to); How is it that you guys are able to bear with it? While it filters the noise, the noise is still there regardless. So, How do you find ways to be able to get to the point where you try to cope with this?

I think the closest example I can give is like wearing a watch, or a something which is new to your body.. at first you will always notice it, but eventually you will no longer notice it until something changes, like it has rotated or got caught on something.

For example I have a desktop fan by my window, it is quite loud.. it can be heard outside of my room, in the garden, half way up the stairs with closed doors.. Yet I am about 2 or 3 feet away right now and unless I think about it, it doesn't really seem to be there, ... until there is a fluctation in electricity then I hear the fan change speed and it grabs my attention again suddenly.

I think the body becomes desensitized to its surroundings...

Like now, notice your breathing, the rate at which you are blinking, the chair pushing up from underneath you.. the smell of the room.. the taste of a soda.

These things may not have been important to you a few seconds ago but now they are very much in your awareness.. I think hearing is kind of similar to this when you have a constant sound floor like background music for extended periods.

I notice I keep mentioning hypnosis today, but hmm.. I find it has a lot of uses in day to day life, or at least, I noticed ways in which it relates and is useful for me to express thoughts..

Such as, While doing hypnosis with someone it is very common to give 'suggestions' of blocking out any sounds with the exception of the operator's voice (operator being the hypnotist). Then suggestions of being able to achieve full alerness in a time of emergency, being perfectly calm, rational and able to function appropriately to ensure their safetly..

The suggestion is normally worded as, " everyday sounds around you cannot disturb or bother you ".. I normally word it in a way that implies those external sounds are not useful right now and that if by any chance they can be heard they simply enhance the process of hypnosis rather than causing it to abruptly end...

The main reasoning behind this is that during hypnosis, its kind of like being half awake and half asleep, the mind is able to process information exceptionally well.... also senses are hightened.. a gentle touch on the tip of a person's nose would be enough to make them jump and can even pop them out of hypnosis... So a sharp sound, can feel extremely unpleasant and panic the individual. Once the suggestions are taken care of, anything that would normal be a concern no longer affects them and most people report being unable to hear anything besides my voice.. A few report hearing stuff but not really caring and just interested in my voice.

 

[tikka]

Interesting thread... I remember asking my audi a similar question the last time I saw her. I noticed that if I'm not really paying attention to the radio that I can make out the many of the words but not always get what the topic is all about. I have to pay close attention to the radio to get the topic.

I wondered if hearing when they listen to the radio have to listen closely to it or if they can get most of what it says even if they're not paying attention.

I almost always find it hard to seperate words of a song from the intruments, its kind of like a blurr for me and I guess I have great hearing...

Listening to a talk radio station, if I am doing other things it can slowly fall to background noise until something interesting pops up that catches my attention, or times when I lay there really enjoying the topic and find that I don't need to try and follow the words because it is very perfectly clear and can start my imagination going wild.

 

[Jolie77]

It's been a while since this thread has been active and we have a lot of more hearing newcomers joining in on this forum. So, I thought it'd be great to get more opinions/feedback to chime in.

 

[Megan8987]

Cons:
My 2yr old Niece telling me she loves me, and her laugh
Listening to music
Great singers
Rainstorms

Cons:
Hearing the neighbors upstairs getting it on
Someone who thinks they can sing but cant
Screech of a chalkboard...gives you goosebumps and hair on end
Someone talking in monotone, where you have to drown 8 cups of coffee to stay awake

There's the good times and the bad, I think if I had to lose one of my senses it would be my hearing.

 

[CJB]

I am late-deafened hard-of-hearing.

I almost always find it hard to seperate words of a song from the intruments, its kind of like a blurr for me and I guess I have great hearing...

I never was able to tease out the lyrics in a song without paying close attention, even with perfect hearing. I had to always focus very hard to understand the lyrics.

Now I can't understand them even if I focus.

Being hearing was nice because everything sounded so clear compared to now. At the same time loud noises were so painful to me and now they're more bearable.

 

[Ribs]

Its both wonderful and terrible at the same time. Terrible in the fact that you hear everything, cant block anything out even if its something you'd rather not hear, like neighbors having a fight. But the wonderful part is music. i love listening to music, its like the most beautiful painting you can, but for the ears. Even if its for the latter i'd much rather keep my hearing than lose it.

 

[JamieLynn]

What I actually like about hearing is watching movies without captions, being able to talk on phone and listening to music. For the rest, I wish I could just tune out whenever I want to, but I can't!!!

 

[mariano]

At the end of the day, life is the same thing, but with less complications. Truth be told, the people that I have met who are blind or deaf are often times happier than the average person. In addition, they are more down to earth. Then again, I guess it is all relative to the individual.

 

[Lissa]

There are some days where I really have a bad day and wish I was hearing. I usually think so much about it but them bad days are slowing going

There's nothing I can do about it, I'll never be hearing. Of course I love hearing with the CI and HA. I especially love being able to remove my hearing

 

[CJB]

At the end of the day, life is the same thing, but with less complications. Truth be told, the people that I have met who are blind or deaf are often times happier than the average person. In addition, they are more down to earth. Then again, I guess it is all relative to the individual.

I don't know, I've met some blind and deaf and deafblind people that are way high up in the air!

But all joking aside I understand what you mean. We might have some minor differences and do things differently, but in the grand scheme, we're all human and are all just going about our lives.