VERY Loud!

[Cloggy]

Can you hear when he's loud? If you can, then tell him that he's being loud. If possible, discipline him when he's loud. For instance, first time is warning... second time is quiet time in his room... third time is take away something from him.

In my experience it was worst when Lotte was happy. I don't think disciplining a child for it's happiness is the way to go. That would be a confusing signal.
Fortunately, when she started hearing with the CI (she was 2¼ years old), the high-pitched sounds/noise/screaming disappeared...

(Added after I read your last post....)
As in the previous post..
with the mapping of CI, loud noises are "taken away" by the software, which is very nice to prevent the child from being scared by loud noises. He might not realise he's making soo much noise. He doesn't hear it.!

 

[Cloggy]

You have got to be kidding?! :roll: Look, if the neighbors don't like it, tell them to sue, file a complaint, call the police, whatever. Let the kid be a kid and you need to get a life. Between the answer VamPyroX gave and peoples' cell phones ringing loud enough to wake the dead, you really need to get a life, cduskey. Some peoples' parents! Sheesh!! Only a hearie would give an answer like that, VamPyroX. Why discipline the boy? I honestly can't believe this one. Thank God you've got a child, cduskey, some people don't and would love to have one!

So, in your world, explaining the situation to the neighbors is not an option... wow.... is that the American way?
And you want to be a lawyer..... well OK, but please, don't become a parent!

 

[farmerjoe]

So, in your world, explaining the situation to the neighbors is not an option... wow.... is that the American way?
And you want to be a lawyer..... well OK, but please, don't become a parent!

I think Pek1 is trying to say that no one should give a damn about what the neighbors think. IF the neighbors ever complain tell them to go to hell or something. ... or tell them to sue and have their case thrown out in court and let them publicly humiliate themselves in the process,. If it's a dog, or a stupid punk playing music too loudly then the neighbors would have a right to complain but complaining about the noise from a small child? pfft!

in order to correct the loudness problem you need to give the child an alternative behavior. what I mean is that the child knows no other way of life than to be loud. If he is slamming the door, for example, teach him how to shut the door softly, then praise him every time he does it correctly. don't put too much effort into correction or punishment, 1) he may not yet be able to see the difference between loud and not-loud actions, 2) children love attention, if you give him attention only for being loud it will just re-enforce that behavior, even if the attention is negative.

 

[Kaitin]

When you live in an apartment, you have to be considerate of your neighbors. It is not like having your own house. And kids need to learn the rules. No discipline is not kind to a kid - he will have rules all his life and he has to learn to get along with others.

But please don't punish a toddler for either happy sounds or for something he can't know he is doing wrong! There is a difference between stopping a bad behavior and showing a kid what to do and punishing him for a behavior that shows he is happy or that he is unaware of.

I was not very loud as a kid. But I do make noise when I am excited. My parents (hearing) told me about "inner happiness" - you can be wildly happy inside and not have others see or hear it. My (hearing) sister and I made up a sign for inner happiness when I was little - you just put both hands in front of your chest and jumble them all around with each other. She calls it the "signing squeel". If I was loud as a kid, they would get my attention, smile at me, and sign "loud" with a funny grimace on their faces. At times they just gave me that look and didn't even have to sign it. But they always smiled and said they weren't mad or didn't understand. I'm sure I was more loud than I remember or know. I am glad they didn't punish me when I was making excited, happy noises or I would have become more self-conscious.

I also remember that when I was little (third grade?) I had HAs that hurt if I made a very loud sound when they were turned up to hear voices. Maybe Pete was right - his CIs need to be turned up. But I wouldn't turn the volume up without asking the audiologist.

I just reread the reply that said he got his CIs 2 months ago. I'm sure that seems like a long time to your neighbors, but he is still adjusting. Two months is not a long time for such a big change. Hopefully, he will learn with consistent patience work with you.

For ideas: Does your son go to speech therapy or see someone regularly about his CI? If so, you maybe want to talk to that person. They might have experience with loud kids and CIs and ideas for gentle lessons.

to you and your son.

 

[pek1]

I think Pek1 is trying to say that no one should give a damn about what the neighbors think. IF the neighbors ever complain tell them to go to hell or something. ... or tell them to sue and have their case thrown out in court and let them publicly humiliate themselves in the process,. If it's a dog, or a stupid punk playing music too loudly then the neighbors would have a right to complain but complaining about the noise from a small child? pfft!

in order to correct the loudness problem you need to give the child an alternative behavior. what I mean is that the child knows no other way of life than to be loud. If he is slamming the door, for example, teach him how to shut the door softly, then praise him every time he does it correctly. don't put too much effort into correction or punishment, 1) he may not yet be able to see the difference between loud and not-loud actions, 2) children love attention, if you give him attention only for being loud it will just re-enforce that behavior, even if the attention is negative.

farmerjoe,

This is the best response yet from everyone, including me and yes, that is what I meant. I wouldn't care what the neighbor's say, why would I? Removing the doors would be a last resort if the slamming doesn't stop, but the parents (BOTH of them) need to be in agreement with this. Another thing . . . if the doors can't be removed, can the door handles? Let him slam them all he wants, but if they can't connect shut, plan backfired. There's gotta be a way to disable the door without damaging it and that it doesn't slam.

 

[VamPyroX]

You have got to be kidding?! :roll: Look, if the neighbors don't like it, tell them to sue, file a complaint, call the police, whatever. Let the kid be a kid and you need to get a life. Between the answer VamPyroX gave and peoples' cell phones ringing loud enough to wake the dead, you really need to get a life, cduskey. Some peoples' parents! Sheesh!! Only a hearie would give an answer like that, VamPyroX. Why discipline the boy? I honestly can't believe this one. Thank God you've got a child, cduskey, some people don't and would love to have one!

I've talked with several of my friends who are teachers in elementary school. They said that they have some loud deaf students who make noises all the time. When told that they were being too loud, their responses were usually that their parents said nothing when they were loud at home.

Being loud is not a right, it's a privilege. We can't just say, "Oh, so what... let them scream. They're not hurting anyone." We need to teach them that being loud is a sign of something else. Do they need help? Are they looking for attention? Are they hurt? Why are they doing it?

Ever heard of the boy who cried wolf? Let them do it over and over, then when they do it for a different reason... we'll never know what is really happening.

 

[Tousi]

I've talked with several of my friends who are teachers in elementary school. They said that they have some loud deaf students who make noises all the time. When told that they were being too loud, their responses were usually that their parents said nothing when they were loud at home.

Being loud is not a right, it's a privilege. We can't just say, "Oh, so what... let them scream. They're not hurting anyone." We need to teach them that being loud is a sign of something else. Do they need help? Are they looking for attention? Are they hurt? Why are they doing it?

Ever heard of the boy who cried wolf? Let them do it over and over, then when they do it for a different reason... we'll never know what is really happening.

If the teachers are really good (parents, too), now would be a good time for the school and the home to work hand in hand with specific behaviors that need to be worked on with positive behavior modification and some things might take a while but it's a good starting point.

 

[jag]

VamPyroX started it and I have to say, if parents have to discipline their children for everything . . . "better be good or I'll get the stick!" like my ex-sister-in-law did with my nephew, no wonder he's a drunk!

Any ideas? Yes, as I suggested, to ask the boy to hold it down, or, manually turn up the volume on the CI so he can hear how loud he is. He'll get the drift when his ears start hurting and gets a headache because of all the loud noise he's doing.

Actually it isn't that bad of an idea to include some type of disapline if the problem continues. But then one needs to choose ones battles. A few reminders before disapline is always a good idea with any child. Especially when you are trying to teach them something. All children should be expected to have good manners and have respect for those around them. Not being so loud it disturbs the neighbors is just respectful. BUt then one has to also concider the time of day the noise is taking place.

The parent needs to look at the child and find the best way to train him to be quiet. If the problem is he isn't quieting down after repeated reminders a different approach is needed. But just as disapline can be chosen so to can the reward approach be used. (a sticker for remembering not to be so loud for a certain amount of time, start with a short period of time...once the boxes are all filled some type of treat) I can tell you that with my youngest child many things did require the disapline approach rather then the reward, sadly until we really really got into her face (so to speak, but sometimes literally) she would go right back to doing what she had been told to stop. Each child is different so one has to learn what works best for that child.

Hmmm, the carrot or the stick?

 

[Dixie]

I was loud as a kid, but everytime I slammed a door I had to go back and re-shut it quietly 10 times. Finally it got so annoying having to reshut the doors all the time that I just started shutting them quietly the first time around.

If talked loudly, I was simply interrupted and told to start over but quietly in a normal tone or not say it at all. It took a while to learn how to regulate my voice and I still have trouble sometimes.

If I was just being loud in general - mom would make me go play outside if it wasnt storming, I couldnt come back in until I decided to be quiet. On cold days, it didnt take long for me to decide to be quiet!

Of course that last bit was possible to do because we lived in rural area with a large fenced in backyard so mom knew I would be OK for a little bit.

 

[pek1]

I was loud as a kid, but everytime I slammed a door I had to go back and re-shut it quietly 10 times. Finally it got so annoying having to reshut the doors all the time that I just started shutting them quietly the first time around.

If talked loudly, I was simply interrupted and told to start over but quietly in a normal tone or not say it at all. It took a while to learn how to regulate my voice and I still have trouble sometimes.

If I was just being loud in general - mom would make me go play outside if it wasnt storming, I couldnt come back in until I decided to be quiet. On cold days, it didnt take long for me to decide to be quiet!

Of course that last bit was possible to do because we lived in rural area with a large fenced in backyard so mom knew I would be OK for a little bit.

You know, Dixie, the first year I had hearing aids, a friend of mine at school mentioned to me that I was too loud once. I considered him a friend and respected him, so I toned it down. Never had to have someone tell me to hold it down since. I still talk a little loud, but not ear piercing loud. I also drop pitch and volume sometimes, which drives even my parents crazy when I do that. I also have a high reliance on body language and facial expressions and watch everything.