I can understand how you're feeling. I have to go back and forth between the hearing and the deaf world too. I have lived with hearing people my whole life. And my parents also decided that I should be commuicating with the deaf side too. I go to a hearing school, and then I'd go to AD to talk with deaf peers while i can. I also had speech therapy since I was about 4 years old And was learning how to sign at 4 years old. But I'll tell you something, In elementary school and in middle school; those were my worst years. I never had a friend to hang out with, and i never really talked to one hearing person to make me feel more comfortable to talk with.
I was usually the shy one. But I grown up. I started to be more comfortable and started to not be afraid to stand up for myself anymore, not afraid to take a stand for others if they're being in their worst days, and started to communicate with hearing people. But the easy thing is: if you don't understand anybody, all you have to do is ask them to repeat it nice and slow.
What's so hard about that? Tell them that you're learning to lip read. It would take years for a deaf person to master lip-reading. Trust me, Been there-done that. And as for the deaf world, you could tell them that you want to learn to sign. But it will be a process. But now since i'm in high school. there are so much more people than elementary school, and middle school. I'm in the marching band and winter drumline. And I have made so much more friends.
But sure I don't have a boyfriend yet but i'll keep hunting for one along the way
All you have to do is stay positive. Be positive will help you be confident, standing up for yourself, and helping others. I know that other people are in this situation like you are. But as long you're confident, you can achive in ANY situation, even like this one. I hope this helps. I might be off topic (i doubt it haha.) But that is probably what i think you should work on. Being positive.
that's coming from a 15 year old girl whose been in the hearing and deaf world back and forth