Should Parents Push Kids To Succeed?....

Encouraging and push aren't the same meaning?

I understand that we shouldn't force or verbal abuse or mental abuse kids to do things.
 
Miss*Pinocchio said:
Encouraging and push aren't the same meaning?

I understand that we shouldn't force or verbal abuse or mental abuse kids to do things.
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I see what you mean. To "push" a child to do well could mean the same thing as encouraging them. It's all in HOW you do that. If your encouragement or push causes harm to the child's self esteem, it's bad. If your encouragement or push is meant to build the child's self esteem, it's postive. Its all in what you SAY to that child, and how YOU (as in the parent), reacts to that child's performance that counts.

Moral of story: Aim to build the child's self esteem; not tear it down.
 
Oceanbreeze said:
I see what you mean. To "push" a child to do well could mean the same thing as encouraging them. It's all in HOW you do that. If your encouragement or push causes harm to the child's self esteem, it's bad. If your encouragement or push is meant to build the child's self esteem, it's postive. Its all in what you SAY to that child, and how YOU (as in the parent), reacts to that child's performance that counts.

Moral of story: Aim to build the child's self esteem; not tear it down.
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Exactly. :)
 
I did encourged my little son, try play ice hockey.. become fall in love playing ice hockey.. When his game went lost game.. He felt lousy himself.. I gave him hug and try your best but still I did gave him nice ice cream or McDonald wha..ever..

Sometimes I did bribe him.. Wanna some Ice cream or treat wha..ever.. He do it and try his best effort to play on ice hockey game and went well so far.. and won the game.. I applaud him.. I still spoiling him and after the game then go out somewhere have his treat..
Every Saturday... (chuckles)

My daughter was particapile basketball.. somehow coach cut her off.. I was kinda unpleasant w/coach which it's conflict interest part of school teacher and coach.. that what i'm disagree w/teacher totally...
Will find it out tomorrow BIG MEETING issues my child's welfare..
 
ButterflyGirl said:
I am sure that Tiger Wood's father encouraged him with some kind encouraging words to do his best in golf.

What ^Angel^ and the rest of us are saying is some parents would push their kids with unkind words. Some bad examples that some parents say to their kids are:
"Why did you lose?"
"Why can't you win?"
"You make me feel embarrassed whenever you don't do well in your sport."
"Why can't you be like that athlete who have never lost?"
"You better win the next time or else!"
"If you don't win I will punish you."
"You were too lazy to win."
"You played awful."
"You can't do anything right."
and so on.........

Parents should encourage their kids to do their best. Some good examples parents can tell their kids are:
"I am so proud of you even though you didn't win but you have played your best."
"We will practice some more to improve on your skills."
"You are improving a bit and keep it up."
"Don't give up."
"If something was bothering you that you didn't play well in your sport and need to talk about it then I will be here to listen to you."
and so on...........

Parents should talk with their kids to make sure if it is what they really want to play in the sport or not. Parents should never push their kids to do something that they do not want to.
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:gpost: You nailed it perfectly! ;)
 
ButterflyGirl said:
I am sure that Tiger Wood's father encouraged him with some kind encouraging words to do his best in golf.

What ^Angel^ and the rest of us are saying is some parents would push their kids with unkind words. Some bad examples that some parents say to their kids are:
"Why did you lose?"
"Why can't you win?"
"You make me feel embarrassed whenever you don't do well in your sport."
"Why can't you be like that athlete who have never lost?"
"You better win the next time or else!"
"If you don't win I will punish you."
"You were too lazy to win."
"You played awful."
"You can't do anything right."
and so on.........

Parents should encourage their kids to do their best. Some good examples parents can tell their kids are:
"I am so proud of you even though you didn't win but you have played your best."
"We will practice some more to improve on your skills."
"You are improving a bit and keep it up."
"Don't give up."
"If something was bothering you that you didn't play well in your sport and need to talk about it then I will be here to listen to you."
and so on...........

Parents should talk with their kids to make sure if it is what they really want to play in the sport or not. Parents should never push their kids to do something that they do not want to.
Click to expand...


Exactly Thank you very much Butterfly Girl, you know exactly what I'm talking about here....Very well said too :hug:
 
I agree. There are some parents to who overboard and start thinking about themselves or being the best instead of letting their kids just have fun.

I've read stories of fathers getting in fights with others at hockey games, parents getting banned from soccer games for arguing with the refs, etc...
 
http://espn.go.com/oly/summer00/tennis/s/0913dokic.html

".........Jelena Dokic leads the locals' campaign for women's hardware at the Games. But while fans were in full support of her, they were united in their disgust over her father...................................................."

Jelena Dokic is Australia/Yugoslavia professional tennis player.

http://espn.go.com/tennis/s/1999/0907/43773.html

".....................Likewise, Dokic's father and coach, Damir, has made his share of headlines this year. During Jelena's first-round match at Birmingham, England, he was removed from the grounds for unruly, alcohol-related behavior and placed in a holding tank for several hours for his own protection. The tabloids immediately dubbed him the "Dad from Hell."............".

“ I would tend to think most parents in sports, tennis and golf especially, those parents are half-nuts to start with. ”
— Richard Williams, father of Venus and Serena
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Wow interesting, Thanks Tamara for sharing that story with us....I have heard some had happened here too, but I can't seem to find a story of it.... :dunno:
 
VamPyroX said:
I agree. There are some parents to who overboard and start thinking about themselves or being the best instead of letting their kids just have fun.

I've read stories of fathers getting in fights with others at hockey games, parents getting banned from soccer games for arguing with the refs, etc...
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Yeah I have heard of that too, and I agree what you said above
 
ButterflyGirl said:
I am sure that Tiger Wood's father encouraged him with some kind encouraging words to do his best in golf.

What ^Angel^ and the rest of us are saying is some parents would push their kids with unkind words. Some bad examples that some parents say to their kids are:
"Why did you lose?"
"Why can't you win?"
"You make me feel embarrassed whenever you don't do well in your sport."
"Why can't you be like that athlete who have never lost?"
"You better win the next time or else!"
"If you don't win I will punish you."
"You were too lazy to win."
"You played awful."
"You can't do anything right."
and so on.........

Parents should encourage their kids to do their best. Some good examples parents can tell their kids are:
"I am so proud of you even though you didn't win but you have played your best."
"We will practice some more to improve on your skills."
"You are improving a bit and keep it up."
"Don't give up."
"If something was bothering you that you didn't play well in your sport and need to talk about it then I will be here to listen to you."
and so on...........

Parents should talk with their kids to make sure if it is what they really want to play in the sport or not. Parents should never push their kids to do something that they do not want to.
Click to expand...


:gpost: :werd:

It's exact what we parents for... we should be proud of our children, not matter what...

The parents is the one who push or humliate their children and make them feel failure is selfish... They only worry about themselves, not their children's feeling.
 
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