Sex Offender's Attacker: 'I Would Do It Again'

[jillio]

When I was a kid, my stepmother had beaten me up the night before school, and then kicked me hard in my back and legs the morning before school. I showed up to school with bruises all over me. My teacher and the school psychologist called CPS. CPS came to my parents' house while I was in school. But, they saw that my parents had a nice big house with a pool and everything, and they decided that I was lying, and closed the case. They didn't even come to my school to look at me and to talk to me. However, I still ended up in foster care a few months later because my stepmother decided she didn't want me and made my dad give me up to the state. I was very glad to leave home, though. I was getting beaten up everyday at home. In foster care I didn't get beaten up so often. I grew up in foster care. I still have PTSD from living with my dad and my stepmother and from what she did to me. I still get very nervous everytime I see a parent yelling at his or her child. I get scared that the parent will hit the child, even though I know it is not likely for the parent to hit the child in public. I really wish the CPS had taken me seriously and took me out of the home right away.

Child abuse can happen in ANY home, in ANY family, doesn't matter if the family is poor or rich or whatever.

I know this is off topic, but I wanted to say all this.

I want to thank you for sharing your story, Lucia. In your case, CPS was negligent in not coming to school and checking you out. They should have done that prior to going to your parents' home. I wish, too, that they had taken you seriously, and they were at fault for not doing so.

You are so right that abuse can happen in any home and any family. No one is immune.

Again, thanks for sharing with us. I know it isn't easy to talk about these things.

 

[Oceanbreeze]

Lucia, I am sorry to hear. I am glad that you stayed away from bitch stepmother. I read your post in other thread about your mom died. I am so sorry. Are you okay?

I have a question for you. Is that illegal for spank to the children if they are being bad? I watched on tv Supernanny Jo Frost. She said spank is not help for children to learn a lesson. The best is sit on naughty stool for an ages minutes.

My cousin's deaf son who have CI. She still do spank on his butt when he was being bad boy. I don't like to see everyone spank on children's butt. Do you think the states need to be legal for parents to spank children or illegal??

No. It is not illegal to spank your kid. It's controversial, but not illegal.

 

[LuciaDisturbed]

Lucia, I am sorry to hear. I am glad that you stayed away from bitch stepmother. I read your post in other thread about your mom died. I am so sorry. Are you okay?

I have a question for you. Is that illegal for spank to the children if they are being bad? I watched on tv Supernanny Jo Frost. She said spank is not help for children to learn a lesson. The best is sit on naughty stool for an ages minutes.

My cousin's deaf son who have CI. She still do spank on his butt when he was being bad boy. I don't like to see everyone spank on children's butt. Do you think the states need to be legal for parents to spank children or illegal??

I am fine now. My mother died when I was 9 years old.

I don't believe in spanking children. When I was a little girl, my dad always spanked me so hard that I almost threw up. He was always excessive when punishing/disciplining me. I won't spank my own children. I will put them in time-outs and other creative ways of disciplining them, instead.

 

[LuciaDisturbed]

Pepsi and Wokamuka, thank you.

 

[LuciaDisturbed]

I want to thank you for sharing your story, Lucia. In your case, CPS was negligent in not coming to school and checking you out. They should have done that prior to going to your parents' home. I wish, too, that they had taken you seriously, and they were at fault for not doing so.

You are so right that abuse can happen in any home and any family. No one is immune.

Again, thanks for sharing with us. I know it isn't easy to talk about these things.

I was punished severely afterwards for CPS coming to my parents' house. I got beaten again. I never had the school call CPS again. I was scared my stepmother would hurt me again.

 

[jillio]

I was punished severely afterwards for CPS coming to my parents' house. I got beaten again. I never had the school call CPS again. I was scared my stepmother would hurt me again.

Your fear was understandable, and no doubt very justified. I am very sorry that the system failed you in that way.

 

[Pinky]

I was punished severely afterwards for CPS coming to my parents' house. I got beaten again. I never had the school call CPS again. I was scared my stepmother would hurt me again.

Your stepmother beat you up. She should go to jail for battery on child.

 

[LuciaDisturbed]

Your stepmother beat you up. She should go to jail for battery on child.

After I went into foster care, she started beating my sister, too. I didn't know she beat my sister until about 4 or 5 years ago, but too late, my sister was already an adult when she told me about it. It made me sad. I wish my stepmother went to jail! I don't like her, I wish my dad would divorce her!

 

[LuciaDisturbed]

Your fear was understandable, and no doubt very justified. I am very sorry that the system failed you in that way.

Thank you. The foster care system in Wisconsin is very broken. I spent most of my years in foster care in different towns around Wisconsin, and then spent my last year in one foster home in Milwaukee. I was lucky that the last foster home I was put in, was a good home. My foster mom is deaf and she is a school psychologist, and she has known me since I was 5, and she took good care of me. Other foster homes weren't very good. Some were very horrible.

 

[jillio]

Thank you. The foster care system in Wisconsin is very broken. I spent most of my years in foster care in different towns around Wisconsin, and then spent my last year in one foster home in Milwaukee. I was lucky that the last foster home I was put in, was a good home. My foster mom is deaf and she is a school psychologist, and she has known me since I was 5, and she took good care of me. Other foster homes weren't very good. Some were very horrible.

The foster system as a whole needs a lot of improvement. When they lowered the criteria to make it easier to qualify as a foster family so there would be more homes available, they unfortunately lowered the quality of care at the same time. I think the rules need to be very strigent. After all, chances are a foster family will be caring for a child that has already been traumatized by the home environment. Placing them in another home that is as bad, or worse, than the one from which they removed is a step backward, not forward.

 

[LuciaDisturbed]

The foster system as a whole needs a lot of improvement. When they lowered the criteria to make it easier to qualify as a foster family so there would be more homes available, they unfortunately lowered the quality of care at the same time. I think the rules need to be very strigent. After all, chances are a foster family will be caring for a child that has already been traumatized by the home environment. Placing them in another home that is as bad, or worse, than the one from which they removed is a step backward, not forward.

I agree.

 

[jillio]

I agree.

I have a friend who is a registered therapuetic foster care provider. The kids that get placed with her come from horrid backgrounds, and have extreme behavior and emotional problems. She has 3 children of her own, and usually 2 foster placements. I have observed how the whole family works together to help these kids adjust to a normal family environment, and have been amazed at how patient and tolerant the whole family is toward these kids. She is really a dedicated individual, and has taken the time to explain the situation to her biological children, and instill a sense of social responsibility in them. Her biological kids have grown up with the attitude that we all have an obligation to do what we can to make this world a better place for those that have suffered.

Unfortunately, not all foster families are this caring and nurturing. I truly wish there were more like her and her family.

 

[LuciaDisturbed]

I have a friend who is a registered therapuetic foster care provider. The kids that get placed with her come from horrid backgrounds, and have extreme behavior and emotional problems. She has 3 children of her own, and usually 2 foster placements. I have observed how the whole family works together to help these kids adjust to a normal family environment, and have been amazed at how patient and tolerant the whole family is toward these kids. She is really a dedicated individual, and has taken the time to explain the situation to her biological children, and instill a sense of social responsibility in them. Her biological kids have grown up with the attitude that we all have an obligation to do what we can to make this world a better place for those that have suffered.

Unfortunately, not all foster families are this caring and nurturing. I truly wish there were more like her and her family.

I wish that, too. Your friend and her family sounds wonderful.

 

[Wokamuka]

The grass is, always, greener on the other side?

 

[Liebling:-)))]

Lucia, I´m very sorry about what and how you had bad experience with your step-mother and CPS. I can´t beleive that CPS care about house than protect you and your feeling...

 

[LuciaDisturbed]

Lucia, I´m very sorry about what and how you had bad experience with your step-mother and CPS. I can´t beleive that CPS care about house than protect you and your feeling...

Thank you, Liebling. Yeah, I couldn't believe it, either. I guess they think that abuse doesn't happen in well-off families. Well, they're wrong. It can happen in ANY family, ANY type of home, ANY income brackets.

Offtopic, I love your avatar. It made me laugh!

 

[shel90]

Thank you, Liebling. Yeah, I couldn't believe it, either. I guess they think that abuse doesn't happen in well-off families. Well, they're wrong. It can happen in ANY family, ANY type of home, ANY income brackets.

Offtopic, I love your avatar. It made me laugh!

Same here...love Liebling's avatar...