Raising Children

Mrs Bucket said:
I admit to doing this .. I do make a sour face when I see a 3 or 4 year old toddler sucking on a soother. I know parents in this thread will not appreciate this BUT a toddler should not be using a soother when the toddler should be using a sippy cup.
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I agree, I think it's inappropriate for 3 or 4 or 5 years old toddlers using a pacifier.
 
jillio said:
Agreed. One of my nephews used a pacifier until he was 3....consequence: 7 years of orthodontics to correct the damage done. His daughter also was a "binky baby" until she was about 3, and is showing the same type of tooth and bone alignment that he had. No doubt, she will also go through expensive and uncomfortable orthodontics.
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I went through the same thing, jillio.

I was a thumb-sucker until I was 12 years old. Yes, 12! My parents worked hard to make sure I stopped thumb-sucking until I was 10 BUT they didn't know I secretly thumb-sucked until I was 12!

I had a set of braces then the orthodontist wondered why the braces weren't working properly until my parents admitted I was still thumb-sucking and then the orthodontist had to put a thumb guard at the roof of my mouth. It was horrible! Each time I jumped or played sports, I'd puncture my tongue!

I hated it so much and could not eat any candies, if I ate caramel, I had to go back to the orthodontist and have it removed. Forget gum!

This is why I shake my head at soothers/thumbsucking... it's personal experience. Yes, it's nervousness & anxiety.

I was not able to express well although I have Deaf parents, parents need to see what is bothering their children.. not mask or coddle.
 
Mrs Bucket said:
I went through the same thing, jillio.

I was a thumb-sucker until I was 12 years old. Yes, 12! My parents worked hard to make sure I stopped thumb-sucking until I was 10 BUT they didn't know I secretly thumb-sucked until I was 12!

I had a set of braces then the orthodontist wondered why the braces weren't working properly until my parents admitted I was still thumb-sucking and then the orthodontist had to put a thumb guard at the roof of my mouth. It was horrible! Each time I jumped or played sports, I'd puncture my tongue!

I hated it so much and could not eat any candies, if I ate caramel, I had to go back to the orthodontist and have it removed. Forget gum!

This is why I shake my head at soothers/thumbsucking... it's personal experience. Yes, it's nervousness & anxiety.

I was not able to express well although I have Deaf parents, parents need to see what is bothering their children.. not mask or coddle.
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I was very lucky with my own son. As soon as he realized, at the age of 24 hours, that there wasn't anything coming out of that pacifier, he spit it out, and never wanted it! I guess his attitude was, "If you aren't going to feed me, don't be sticking things in my mouth to try and fool me!":giggle:
 
All of my grown up children never had their pacifier when they were babies. I've always held them, talked to them, played with them, took them outside when there was a nice and warm weather. I took them to visit my Christian friends, too. :)

All of them are very socialized and independent.
 
jillio said:
I was very lucky with my own son. As soon as he realized, at the age of 24 hours, that there wasn't anything coming out of that pacifier, he spit it out, and never wanted it! I guess his attitude was, "If you aren't going to feed me, don't be sticking things in my mouth to try and fool me!":giggle:
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:giggle: You have a smart son!

You know, sometimes I think there is a reason why I don't have children yet. If I were to have children, they would never walk! :laugh2: I would just be holding them all the time.

That explains why my niece and nephews just hate it when I kiss them. I don't just kiss, I really "sloppy kiss with a big WET 'mmmmmmwaahhhhhh!" kiss!" :laugh2:
 
Mrs Bucket said:
:giggle: You have a smart son!

You know, sometimes I think there is a reason why I don't have children yet. If I were to have children, they would never walk! :laugh2: I would just be holding them all the time.

That explains why my niece and nephews just hate it when I kiss them. I don't just kiss, I really "sloppy kiss with a big WET 'mmmmmmwaahhhhhh!" kiss!" :laugh2:
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My great nephews and nieces call those "Aunt Jillio's power kisses!" They now return them to me when they see me!
 
jillio said:
My great nephews and nieces call those "Aunt Jillio's power kisses!" They now return them to me when they see me!
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Heh heh! My littlest nephew does that! I call them 'razzies' and just love holding them & feeling their soft skin when they were so tiny.

See why I know I would never let little kids walk.. I'd be holding them all the time.

Gosh, I'm such a hypocrite about soothers yet carrying them around & not letting them walk! :laugh2:
 
yea i notice some people give their dirty faces when they see other parents who allow kids to have pacifers. for me, i dont care as long as its their concerns, not mine. I still dont get it why some people HAVE to give their dirty faces to STRANGERS WITH THEIR STRANGERS KIDS. It is of their businesses, not mine. i guess they HAVE problems themselves, not the parents with kids who suck the pacifers. :shrug:
 
Mrs Bucket said:
I went through the same thing, jillio.

I was a thumb-sucker until I was 12 years old. Yes, 12! My parents worked hard to make sure I stopped thumb-sucking until I was 10 BUT they didn't know I secretly thumb-sucked until I was 12!

I had a set of braces then the orthodontist wondered why the braces weren't working properly until my parents admitted I was still thumb-sucking and then the orthodontist had to put a thumb guard at the roof of my mouth. It was horrible! Each time I jumped or played sports, I'd puncture my tongue!

I hated it so much and could not eat any candies, if I ate caramel, I had to go back to the orthodontist and have it removed. Forget gum!

This is why I shake my head at soothers/thumbsucking... it's personal experience. Yes, it's nervousness & anxiety.

I was not able to express well although I have Deaf parents, parents need to see what is bothering their children.. not mask or coddle.
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Wow. My cousin stopped suckin her thumb till 18 years old. Her front 2 tooth is big and look like rabbit.
 
Frisky Feline said:
yea i notice some people give their dirty faces when they see other parents who allow kids to have pacifers. for me, i dont care as long as its their concerns, not mine. I still dont get it why some people HAVE to give their dirty faces to STRANGERS WITH THEIR STRANGERS KIDS. It is of their businesses, not mine. i guess they HAVE problems themselves, not the parents with kids who suck the pacifers. :shrug:
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Exactly. And I am not even aggressive or have any guts to go to stranger and telling them that they do it wrong. What if they would beat me up or something. I couldn't believe that stranger actually came to me. Very strange.
 
I can't remember using a pacifier. I can't remember seeing one in any of my baby photo's either.

I've known a 4 year old who had a pacifier. I've even know a 16 year old who had one. It doesn't shock me. I don't know what the big deal is.

When I was growing up I used to chew all sorts of things like my hair, my pencil's, my clothes. They all had my teeth marks on them. I did that until I was about ten as I was a very nervous kid. I wonder if a pacifier would have saved on so many damaged items.

I don't see how teeth and pacifiers have any corilation. Since teeth are damaged by too much junk food. Nothing to do with pacifiers. My parents always insist on feeding us health foods and limiting sweets. I still have fairly good teeth.
 
dreama said:
I don't see how teeth and pacifiers have any corilation. Since teeth are damaged by too much junk food. Nothing to do with pacifiers. My parents always insist on feeding us health foods and limiting sweets. I still have fairly good teeth.
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Baby teeth have thinner enamel than adult teeth. A pediatrician would tell parents that pacifiers and sucking thumb would make infants/toddlers front teeth uneven after their teeth grow at 6 months to 12 months, that's why pediatricians recommend to stop using the pacifiers at 6 months of age. :)
 
dreama said:
I can't remember using a pacifier. I can't remember seeing one in any of my baby photo's either.

I've known a 4 year old who had a pacifier. I've even know a 16 year old who had one. It doesn't shock me. I don't know what the big deal is.

When I was growing up I used to chew all sorts of things like my hair, my pencil's, my clothes. They all had my teeth marks on them. I did that until I was about ten as I was a very nervous kid. I wonder if a pacifier would have saved on so many damaged items.

I don't see how teeth and pacifiers have any corilation. Since teeth are damaged by too much junk food. Nothing to do with pacifiers. My parents always insist on feeding us health foods and limiting sweets. I still have fairly good teeth.
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The constant sucking motion of a pacifier distorts not just the tooth position, but the growth of the bone supporting the teeth as well. It is much more than a correlation, it is cause and effect. Children who use a pacifier into their toddler years develop what is known as an "open bite". That means that the only point that their teeth come together is at the very back. This interferes with their ability to properly chew foods. If not corrected, it can also lead to problems with digestion, because the food cannot be chewed properly.

Cheri is also correct about the enamel on baby teeth. A child who continues to use a bottle instead of a cup after their teeth have come in is at risk for getting what is known as "Nursing Bottle Caries." ("Caries" means cavities.) When a child uses a bottle, the liguid stays in their mouth longer, and settles around the teeth. Even milk has a large amount of sugars in it, and will cause cavities when taken from a bottle instead of a cup.
 
Both of my kids used a pacifier until they were 18 months old. I took all the bottles and pacifiers away from them and both adjusted to life without them pretty well except for when my son saw other kids with pacifiers. He would go up to them and take their pacifiers away from them and try to put them in his mouth. I always thought that was so funny but now, at 3..he doesnt even think about them anymore.

I give my daughter an allowance for household chores. Is that a bad thing to do?
 
shel90 said:
Both of my kids used a pacifier until they were 18 months old. I took all the bottles and pacifiers away from them and both adjusted to life without them pretty well except for when my son saw other kids with pacifiers. He would go up to them and take their pacifiers away from them and try to put them in his mouth. I always thought that was so funny but now, at 3..he doesnt even think about them anymore.

I give my daughter an allowance for household chores. Is that a bad thing to do?
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We were never given an allowance when we were kids. We were just expected to clean our room and do light chores around the house. My sister was expected to help Mom load and unload the dishwasher. I was expected to help my sister set the table.

That said, I don't see any harm in giving a kid a weekly allowance for chores done. It teaches them about money management. I don't know the latest thinking on this, but if that is something that works for you, I wouldn't question it. Your her Mother and how you teach her responsiblity if your call. No one elses. :)
 
shel90 said:
Both of my kids used a pacifier until they were 18 months old. I took all the bottles and pacifiers away from them and both adjusted to life without them pretty well except for when my son saw other kids with pacifiers. He would go up to them and take their pacifiers away from them and try to put them in his mouth. I always thought that was so funny but now, at 3..he doesnt even think about them anymore.

I give my daughter an allowance for household chores. Is that a bad thing to do?
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I wouldn't say it's a bad thing. I would only say that if you give an allowance for chores done, you should also with hold allowance if the chores do not get done. That teaches a child that you only get the benefits if you do the job.
 
jillio said:
I wouldn't say it's a bad thing. I would only say that if you give an allowance for chores done, you should also with hold allowance if the chores do not get done. That teaches a child that you only get the benefits if you do the job.
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Oh I hold her allowance. My mom gave us an allowance for doing household chores so I am just following her footsteps.
 
shel90 said:
I give my daughter an allowance for household chores. Is that a bad thing to do?
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Of course not, allowance is different from bribery. An allowance teach kids about responsibilities and skills that will help them later in life when they have a job in the future or when they live on their own, their moms are not gonna be there to clean after themselves. :giggle: so they might as well know how to clean the house now while they can earn $$. :)
 
well i dont have a child of my own but i m in a serious relatinoship with a woman that have her own daughter and i d like to think of myself as a step father or father whichever works

anyway i think punishment works better via boredom or taking away they love the most like for example if they love videogames or hanging out if they break a rule take those away and ensure they wont have any 2ndary distractions like cell phones they need the moment to think waht they ve done
and if they did well like good grades depending on age they should either get a candy or a good reward on what they wanted ( within reason)
 
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