Wow! I don't know what planet your audi is from but that is about one of the most silliest statements I ever heard of.
I've had a CI for > 4 years and my wife uses bounce or whatever the sheet is all during that time. No problem, nothing, nada, zilch.
Static electricity can be a problem but you gotta be working hard on trying to zap your processor. For instance, going down a plastic slide in a playground can be problematical. As long as your head on the implant side doesn't touch or rub down the slide itself, you won't have a problem. In case your processor gets zapped, you just have to get it reprogrammed again. In some cases, maybe you might have a problem with the processor but that probability should be slim to none.
If you have some serious electricity (far beyond static electricity) hit your processor, well yes it will probably be fried and need a new one. At the same time, you may well either be in the hospital or dead.