PTSD and abuse.

[Hear Again]

Read again...

"So, I'm not saying we should blame ourselves or blame society."

if you are saying differently, i would appreciate an explanation clarifying exactly what you mean.

 

[Hear Again]

some people still don't get it. *shrugs*

 

[Jiro]

He made statements that greatly upset alot of us. If we misinterpreted what he was saying, then OK. But, I think he needs to clarify what he meant because he offended many of us; myself included.

I clarified for him and he agreed with my clarification. Vampy simply misspoke.

 

[SFShawn13]

vampy is a guy? lulz i thought he was a chick.

 

[Jiro]

vampy is a guy? lulz i thought he was a chick.

how did you come to that conclusion? :scratch:

 

[SFShawn13]

lol idk

 

[Jiro]

lol idk

 

[Mrs Bucket]

lol idk

 

[SFShawn13]

 

[Tousi]

Vampy, I'm glad they didn't get their pint of blood out of you today. Some folks here are ever-ready to pounce on others at the slightest hint of an insult and it isn't healthy. There are other sites for this. The recent explosion of these kinds of threads here in AD is driving folks away.

 

[SFShawn13]

Vampy, I'm glad they didn't get their pint of blood out of you today. Some folks here are ever-ready to pounce on others at the slightest hint and it isn't healthy. There are other sites for this. The recent explosion of these kinds of threads here in AD is driving folks away.

Oh brother. All Vampy had to do was clarify his opinion and it's no big deal. :roll:

 

[LuciaDisturbed]

It took a long time, and a lot of work, but I feel like I'm moving on. I have my girl, and while things went very badly that day, it could have turned out much worse.
When we went to trial of the malpractice in December, I had to listen and relive the whole thing....that was exhausting. It wasn't great to hear the defense blame me but I made it through.

And your girl is incredibly cute! I left a comment on your public profile.

 

[Hear Again]

Vampy, I'm glad they didn't get their pint of blood out of you today. Some folks here are ever-ready to pounce on others at the slightest hint and it isn't healthy. There are other sites for this. The recent explosion of these kinds of threads here in AD is driving folks away.

all any of us asked for was an explanation from vampy. nothing more, nothing less.

 

[LuciaDisturbed]

Lol. So a 3 year old who watches his father beat up his mom can't "handle" stress well, so it's the 3 year old's fault right?


*barf*

Yeah, I highly doubt a 3 year old can watch his dad beat up his mom and not be scared and start crying. :roll:

A 3 year old cannot help but get very frightened when he or she sees somebody being hurt badly. That's extremely natural for such a small child. It's naturally SCARY for that child, or for anybody for that matter. I know I would be FRIGHTENED at ANY AGE if I saw my dad beat the shit out of my mom, and even worse if it happened on a regular basis. So, no it is NOT that child's fault for developing PTSD from seeing what happened, especially if it happens on a regular basis, and then can't deal with stress very well as a result.

Caution - Physical child abuse details:

I was physically abused from the age of 10 until 16 (placed in foster care at age 13) by many different abusers, including my dad and his wife, and some people in certain foster placements. I continued to be in foster care until I was 18, but when I was 16 my case was handed over to a private catholic foster care agency from the county (thank goodness), and as a result, I was taken out of the last abusive foster care placement, and placed with a deaf foster family. I still was shuffled between several foster homes, but all were much safer than the ones I was in before my case was handled by the private foster care agency. I didn't stay with the first deaf foster family for very long, but my PTSD did not surface until six months after I arrived at the first deaf foster family's home. Everything was fine, I was happy, etc. Then I went to Gallaudet for a summer program, and something happened there, and then I came back, and I proceeded to begin to fall apart due to PTSD from previous foster care abuse and from my dad and wife abusing me. And the end result was being sent to another foster home because the first deaf foster family I was with was not prepared to deal with my PTSD issues, and could not help me. I don't blame them. I went to stay with a deaf foster mother who had known me since I was a small child, and who is a school psychologist, so therefore she was able to help me, and was able to keep me.

Now, I get nervous if I see a parent yelling at a crying small child, or if I see a parent at a mall smacking her 8 year old daughter in the face, or if I see a couple arguing at a bus stop. I even immediately begin to walk away from the area if I see a gang fight about to start (I can tell very easily - the shouting and then flashing of the gang signs - time to go bye bye!) and stuff like that. I don't like tense situations. I don't like arguments. I can't handle seeing a parent yell at her or his child while I am visiting their home, because then I get afraid that the parent will end up taking the child to another room and then end up hitting the child, as that was what often happened to me when I was younger. I even often get shocked at how children act around their parents at the mall or the grocery store or a restaurant or school or whatnot, even though it is considered normal "rude" behavior that normally should only warrant a time-out (such as rolling their eyes, back-talking, making faces, being impolite, wandering away from the parents, laughing, the way they dress, language - even non-cussing, etc), because I knew that if I acted like that around my dad or his wife or at school, I would be BEATEN UP as soon as we/I got home. I end up worrying about that child I saw acting up, and I hope that child didn't get hurt later that day for her or his behavior.

I also have more PTSD resulting from MANY other things as well, but they are things that I do not wish to discuss here on AllDeaf, as they are even more personal.

So, yeah, I'm annoyed with people who thinks they understand PTSD but really don't understand it.

 

[LuciaDisturbed]

Yes, and no. If there is a comorbid diagnosis of depression, then SSRIs may be used. But panic attacks, as a free standing and independent diagnosis, are the result of an anxiety disorder, not a mood disorder.

You are right. I have panic attacks, and SSRIs wouldn't help me when one comes on, because SSRIs are usually an once-daily medication meant to treat depression and general anxiety (not attack, just anxiety in general). When I have a panic attack, I need something I can take right away that will take effect in about 20 minutes so I can calm down and be able to breathe normally. I used to think my panic attacks were asthma attacks years ago before I even knew anything about PTSD and panic/anxiety attacks, and I tried asthma medications, and none of them helped. I couldn't understand why. They feel a lot like asthma attacks because when they occur, I can't breathe very well. It was only a few years ago that I only began to understand, and now I take benzo's such as Xanax for my panic/anxiety attacks, because I can take benzo's several times a day depending on how often the attacks happen. Fortunately, they do not happen that often, but I also have other situations where I still need the benzo's anyway in order to stay calm. So, for panic/anxiety attacks, I would recommend benzo's such as Xanax, Klonopin, Ativan, and many others. They take effect much quicker than SSRI's, and can be taken several times a day depending on how often someone has an attack.

 

[LuciaDisturbed]

I'm not doing the blame game. I'm just saying that different people do respond differently to different situations.

I do have a few friends who can't handle different things. One of them usually snaps and gets into an argument whenever someone brings up a deaf-related argument. Her reason? She was raised with deaf-only ideals and anything that she feels makes deaf people look bad... she blows her top. Another usually snaps when someone brings up something about blacks. One person said that he didn't want to join a black club because of how the members acted. So, this person blew up saying that it was the "black way" and that the other person had no right to say it. There's another who can handle stress with one club very well, but she collapses with another club because her position involves real work and not play work like she does in her other club. (Yeah, she quit this club cuz she couldn't handle the "workload".)

So, I'm not saying we should blame ourselves or blame society. It's like the nature versus nurture argument. I'm not going to go there. A psychiatrist is best suited to answer that kind of question.

All I'm saying is that it could be anything. You can't just say "Oh, it's because of family" to all PTSD victims. It varies.

Do you have PTSD? Yes or no?

 

[LuciaDisturbed]

Why not read this?

Posttraumatic stress disorder - Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia

Wiki is not a good source.

 

[LuciaDisturbed]

I think Vampy said it correctly. It is anything.

I'm sorry but sometimes some members here are uncomfortable "flowering up their words" because some members here are not able to tolerate the posts.

Do you have PTSD? If not, then you have absolutely no idea.

 

[LuciaDisturbed]

Don't you think if some members were being careful keeping their trigger words to themselves in the first place? By not revealing way too much information about themselves and their disorders in the very first place, they would NOT be very susceptible to the trigger words in this site.

How would that work? There are so many triggers on this website, and no one has to say anything about their own triggers and their own disorders in the first place in order to be triggered. They can be triggered without even saying ANYTHING.

Now how's this for being considerate, I share my feedback, you attack me instead of attacking my approach. STFU.

No, how about this? You don't know anything about PTSD. So, you STFU.

 

[Tousi]

This "private room" idea is looking better with each passing volley here....